Chapter 83
Chapter 83
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Translator: penny
Chapter: 83
Chapter Title: Side Story - Memories of a Certain Princess (7)
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#11 Their Circumstances: The Circumstances of a Certain Villain.
This little brat really is completely insane. No, a crazy bitch.
"If you keep that up, I'll seriously ask His Majesty the Emperor for marriage."
Is it because of my carelessness last time when I showed her I was flustered?
When this kid finds herself at a disadvantage, she brings up marriage.
"Your Highness, no matter how much you insist, what's not allowed is not allowed."
"Really? For real? Yeah? No helping it then. In that case, I'll really tell Father that I want to get married."
"The laws of the Empire do not yet permit Your Highness's marriage."
"Heh~ I heard you've been frequenting the imperial library whenever you have free time lately. Were you studying imperial law?"
This kid used to nag me with an expressionless face before, but lately, she's learned somewhere to pressure me with a sly look.
"Yes, learning is always necessary."
"Yeah, then you must know that while marriage might be impossible under imperial law, an engagement is at least possible?"
She knows it well enough. Among noble families, engagements are often arranged even before children are born.
An engagement at around ten years old would be a decent age.
But the condition is just too bizarre.
"Your Highness, isn't the reason you're discussing something as important as an imperial engagement—something vital to the imperial family and the Empire itself—just too flimsy?"
The reason Her Highness the Princess, who would normally back off after seeing me squirm a bit, is pushing like this...
It's simply...
"You're threatening me with an engagement just because you don't want to eat carrots and cucumbers."
"Ast. I don't like them, so I don't want them."
That's right. The princess was blackmailing me with her own marriage over vegetables: carrots and cucumbers.
Her Highness the Princess, frowning and throwing a massive tantrum, might look her age, but to me—who knows the true nature lurking inside—it's nothing but repulsive acting!
So here, I need to stand firm.
"No matter how much Your Highness threatens me, as Your Highness's exclusive butler, I must look after your health, so I cannot fulfill such a request."
"It's just skipping carrots and cucumbers—it's not like that will harm my health."
Of course, since the imperial family feeds her all sorts of nutritious things, skipping cucumbers and carrots won't cause any health issues.
But for the princess who constantly pesters me with annoying tasks, this mealtime is the only chance for righteous revenge.
I can't let this moment slip!
"Your Highness. Among the duties of an exclusive butler is the obligation to raise you properly. To correct Your Highness's picky eating..."
I tried to persuade (trick) Her Highness the Princess with what seemed like a reasonable excuse, but from the side, Lady Lea—who was eating a sandwich as a light snack before lunch—took a bite and shouted.
"Ah! Hold on, Sir Ast! Your own sandwich doesn't have cucumber, yet you're only saying that to Her Highness—doesn't that undermine your persuasion?"
Tch, caught.
"But why are you eating my sandwich, Lady Lea?"
"Because I finished mine."
"Does that mean it's okay for a lady to just take someone else's?"
"Oh my, when did I ever get treated like a lady around here?"
Lady Lea, casually eating my sandwich with an indifferent expression, had undoubtedly grown stronger.
Not in terms of physical power. She was already a swordmaster when we first met, so her strength was always there.
But in the past month, her mental fortitude had grown so dazzlingly it hurt to look at.
This, this must be the mental strength gained from being rejected by all fifteen men I introduced her to!
"Ast, it's fine to play around happily with Lea, but don't you have something to say to me first?"
While I was admiring Lady Lea's growth, Her Highness the Princess—who had been watching me with the occasional glance—spoke to me. She had been looking at me with that gaze.
What gaze? The look you give hopeless trash beyond saving?
"Your Highness. Cucumbers are irredeemable ingredients. Cooking is about combining different ingredients to create flavor, but cucumbers infect other foods with their taste and smell, ruining them. They're a terribly bad ingredient."
"Yeah, I think so too, Ast. So why do you put them in my food but not in yours?"
That? That's obvious.
"Your Highness, I'm an adult. Children mustn't be picky for the sake of growth, but adults whose growth spurt is over don't need to eat cucumbers."
"What kind of nonsense is that?"
"In other words, Your Highness is still in your growth phase, so you mustn't be picky, but I've finished mine, so it's fine for me to be picky."
"Do you even realize what nonsense you've been spouting since earlier, Ast?"
Even I know it's bullshit, but admitting it means getting devoured by that monster in the form of a young girl.
Damn it, in another world, guys treated similarly are orphans turned soldiers who have to take shit from superiors.
But our monster Highness has princess status—no superior telling her to take shit.
"Your Highness. I lost my parents young, and soon after, my stupid lord blew up the territory and the country."
"So, want me to say you're pitiful?"
What a heartless Highness.
Of course, if she actually treated me pitifully, that'd be creepy in its own way.
"No, I don't want to blame others for my bad luck. It's just that because of that childhood, I never got to be picky as a kid."
"Sir Ast..."
Lady Lea looked at me with deeply sad eyes.
But isn't that sandwich in her hand mine? I only ate one bite, and half my portion is already gone?
"So?"
"Because I wasn't picky as a child, I grew up well like this. Therefore, Your Highness mustn't be picky either."
"Ah, I see?"
Her Highness the Princess nodded as if understanding my words, then smiled slyly at me.
"Cut the bullshit and stop it. Swap yours with mine, Ast."
And as soon as she finished speaking, her hand shot out toward my sandwich!
Smack!
"I refuse."
I extended my hand, slapped away Her Highness's, and protected my sandwich.
"Are you insane? Striking an imperial hand?"
"Your Highness. Imperial law clearly states that those attending young royals—like exclusive butlers and wet nurses like me, or tutors for education—may administer light corporal punishment."
"You memorized all that annoying stuff. But does picky eating fall under things needing corporal punishment?"
"Your Highness. Picky eating can also fall under dietary education."
Her Highness, glaring at me—or rather, my sandwich—with narrowed eyes, soon turned to Lady Lea.
"Lea, did Ast's sandwich have carrots in it by any chance?"
Munch... "Yes? Oh. You mean Sir Ast's sandwich?"
Caught off-guard by Her Highness's sudden question, Lady Lea forced down the sandwich she was munching and nodded.
"Yes, it did."
Well, I hate cucumbers but not carrots much, so I kept the carrots in.
"Good, Ast. This time, I'll fix my carrot pickiness. You start small and improve gradually, right? So swap your sandwich with mine."
Oh! Declaring on her own to fix the carrot pickiness that failed last time thanks to Lady Lea!
"To say you'll fix your pickiness yourself—commendable, Your Highness."
"Right? So..."
Her Highness spoke with a slightly aggrieved expression.
I cut her off and continued.
"But I refuse!"
"Why?!"
Why? Obviously!
"Because I hate cucumbers, Your Highness!"
"...Grind."
After a brief blank expression at my words, Her Highness the Princess ground her teeth and ordered Lady Lea.
"Lea, I command you as your lord. Bring Ast's sandwich to me."
"Yes, Your Highness."
Huh? Hold on.
"Lady Lea?"
"I'm sorry, Sir Ast. But it's my lord's command."
At the word "command," Lady Lea's demeanor completely changed.
In the not-short time I've observed her, I've seen this only once before.
It was during that real-combat mock battle with Her Highness, when she unleashed magic bombardment.
The difference was that this time, it was right in front of me!
"Lady Lea. This is crucial for Her Highness's growth..."
"Yes, I know. But Her Highness's command takes precedence."
Wow, people can change this much. Normally, she'd brush it off with "I-is that so?"
"Do you really have to go this far?"
"My sword is dedicated to Her Highness. So even if His Majesty the Emperor commanded it, I must prioritize Her Highness's orders."
At this point, I started to worry.
Could I beat Lady Lea as she is now?
No way.
Could I protect my sandwich from her?
Also impossible.
So there's only one way.
"Lady Lea, if you're going to be like this, then I'll get serious."
"Yes, Sir Ast. I heard you train with the sword every day regularly."
Right, symbols of fantasy.
To survive in this fantasy world without magic or summons, I at least need to handle a sword.
My past life and this one aren't so different.
I need to swing something familiar like a sword.
That's why I've never let go of my sword, not once.
Even the organization acknowledged my swordsmanship; in every life I remember, the sword was always in my hand.
Shing.
Lady Lea drew her sword from her waist, emanating such intense pressure that my whole body tingled as she stared at me.
"I didn't expect it like this, but I've wanted to see Sir Ast's swordsmanship."
I also took a slight step back. And reached out.
For the sandwich.
"Huh?"
"Eh?"
Lady Lea, who had been staring at me intently, and Her Highness the Princess, who had been watching us with keen interest—both just blankly watched my mukbang.
"W-wait, Sir Ast! Wasn't this heading toward a sword clash between us?"
Sword clash? With the Princess of Swords?
Honestly, in pure swordsmanship, I have confidence I won't lose to Lady Lea.
No matter how genius she is, my sword experience from past lives totals over 40 years.
But I don't have the guts to challenge her when she's in full serious mode.
Why is the Sword Emperor, among the Five Sword Titles, the most respected by swordsmen?
Because they hold the pinnacle position in the field of swordsmanship.
Yet, the Sword Emperor is rated as the weakest among the Five Sword Titles.
Because most who become Sword Emperors compensate for lack of mana with swordsmanship.
Sword aura uses mana.
And sword beam compresses that aura, consuming a filthy amount of mana.
So even after breaking through swordmaster walls, insufficient mana means you can't even use sword beam a few times.
In fact, among past Sword Emperors, there was one with just enough mana for a single sword beam.
That's why, to purely evaluate sword ability, fights to inherit the Sword Emperor title ban mana use.
But in real combat, that doesn't matter.
In real fights, mana reigns supreme. Even in wuxia novels, protagonists go invincible with internal energy, not external techniques, right?
Train external arts all you want; one sword beam sends you packing in the martial world.
In short, I'm a master of external arts and sword; Lady Lea is a master of internal energy and sword.
No matter how much I swing my sword to build strength, one sword beam from her will slice me—and my sword—in half.
But this fight isn't between me and Lady Lea.
"Delicious. Thanks for the meal."
Thanks to Lady Lea, I crammed the few remaining bites of sandwich into my mouth and swallowed them down.
The reason for this fight was Her Highness ordering Lady Lea to bring me my sandwich.
"So, Lady Lea. Now there's no reason to fight, right?"
Thus, as long as the sandwich doesn't reach Her Highness's hands, it's my victory!
No need to fight—just eat it all!
"Y-you, Sir Ast... Don't you have any pride as a swordsman?"
"Before receiving the honorary knight title, I am Her Highness's exclusive butler. Correcting Her Highness's pickiness takes priority over my pride."
Honestly, it's to flip off Her Highness big time, but packaging it like this minimizes backlash.
"And Lady Lea. If anyone's pride should be hurt, isn't it you?"
"Ugh."
Lady Lea stiffened at my words.
"Because you failed to carry out Her Highness's command."
Looking at her, I flashed the rotten grin a certain notebook god once wore.
"I-I'm sorry, Your Highness."
Even as her eyebrows twitched at my words, she bowed to Her Highness.
"No, it's fine."
Crunch.
"You both did it for me, after all."
Munch munch.
'Sh-should I have just given it up?'
As Her Highness glared at me while furiously brushing her teeth—no, furiously mukbanging the sandwich in rage—cold sweat started dripping down my back.
"Yeah, right. It was for me, after all. I should understand." Her Highness, ignoring imperial etiquette, chewed viciously on the sandwich in her hand. Her eyes looked anything but understanding.