The Wildcat Young Master
August, 189 AD
A few days had already passed since I started working at Chwiwharu.
Yu Bi helped me as if the work were her own, and the job itself had been simple from the start, so settling in did not take long at all.
"Ah... Do Yeop, two dumplings left over today!"
In the small hours after the tavern had closed, once the cleaning was done, Yu Bi came over and showed me the dumplings cupped in both her hands. Meals came with the job, but pocketing leftover food like this was its own quiet little pleasure.
They were not the meat dumplings most people picture, though — just lumps of wheat flour, a kind of flower bun. Probably because Zhuge Liang and Zhang Zhongjing had not invented jiaozi yet.
Drip, drip...
So we sat side by side in the stable where the rain leaked through the eaves, chewing our cold dumplings in forlorn silence.
I was working because I had to eat to survive — but at this rate, when was I ever supposed to receive a Yuedanping and get commissioned into Cao Cao's army?
"What are you thinking about?"
"Just wondering whether it's all right to live like this. The age of chaos is almost here, and here I am eating cold dumplings in a stable..."
"An age of chaos... what do you mean by that? The Yellow Turban remnants are still stirring up trouble here and there, true, but the court is still functioning, is it not?"
"That's only because you don't know better, Yu Bi. By now the court's authority probably doesn't reach the provinces at all — the local great clans are already administering things in its place. And more than that, the Ten Eunuchs would never just leave He Jin alone after he monopolized power like that."
"I-is that so? I had no idea... oh dear..."
Well, of course you didn't — you're a waiter scraping by meal to meal. But those eyes of hers, round as saucers and ready to pop, were so endearing that I found myself rambling on without meaning to.
"Something big is going to break at court soon. And if the court's power falls into the hands of some violent outsider, even the Son of Heaven's safety might be at risk."
"Hup... then that's terrible, isn't it? We have to do something — but what... what do we do..."
Yu Bi fell into a full-blown panic, fretting with nowhere to put her hands. That's the politicians' job. You just need to clean well and take orders properly, don't you?
"Come to think of it, Yu Bi — do you have a goal in life?"
"A goal in life? Sigh... I used to have one, but now I'm not sure anymore. I just hope the realm finds peace, that's all..."
"That's a pretty grand goal, you know. Mine is simpler — find a good lord, anyone will do, and live the rest of my life in comfort."
"What!? Why would you settle for such a petty dream? A proper man should strap on a great sword, ride the battlefield, and rise above others, should he not?"
"What's that supposed to mean... Ambitious people can do that, sure, but I don't have it in me. Whatever I try, I can't even manage half of half of what other people do... You probably wouldn't understand what I mean, Yu Bi."
With a total stat sum of a hundred, just surviving is already an achievement. Separate from that, though, Yu Bi clearly did not care for my single-minded pursuit of personal safety.
Flash!
In that instant, a tremendous light flared outside. Yu Bi stopped mid-bite and blinked.
"A sudden great light shone upon us. Could it be an auspicious omen?"
"That's lightning. Any moment now—"
CRACK!
—the thunder, slower than light, would arrive. Yu Bi had been so completely off guard that she startled and dropped the dumpling in her hand.
"Kyaa!!"
Then she made a thoroughly feminine sound, dove straight into my arms, and began to tremble. Even a pockmarked plain girl was still a girl, it seemed.
Sniff, sniff...
Separately from that, a pleasant scent rose from the crown of her head. For a waiter who lived in a stable, with no cosmetics and barely a proper wash to her name.
Even with the oil and grime, her hair was smooth as silk. Truth be told, between that soft way of speaking and her neat bearing, she had a refinement that did not suit a tavern server at all.
And perhaps because she was fundamentally XX — with her pressed against me like this, a restless feeling crept over me before I could stop it.
Honestly, if only her face weren't pockmarked, I'd just go ahead and...
"Ah... I've made a terrible mistake."
Yu Bi hurriedly pulled herself free of me. To spare her the embarrassment, I picked up the dumpling and brushed it off for her.
"It's fine. Anyone would do that when they're startled."
"I'm grateful you would say so... but you really are strange, Do Yeop. Most people avoid me and keep their distance, yet you have never once done so."
"No reason to avoid you, is there? We're waiter colleagues working the same job."
"Sigh... that may be true, but I suffered a severe bout of plague, did I not? So people around me refuse to come anywhere near."
So that was why she found me so unusual. Come to think of it, something like that had happened not long ago.
Tap, tap...
I had been hard at work when I felt a tap on my back. Turning around, I found the freckled waiter who had first welcomed me to the place.
"What is it?"
"You hit that yet?"
"Huh? I haven't even touched those dumplings—"
"Not that, you idiot. You bang Yu Bi yet?"
"..."
If you're going to talk nonsense, at least turn your blinker on first, would you? Then again, this was an age before turn signals had been invented, so maybe everyone just went for the direct approach.
"What are you talking about? I'm not like that with Yu Bi."
"You sleep next to her every night and move around together, don't you? Damn, kid's got some appetite — how do you even think about rubbing skin with a leper? I've seen plague survivors before, and those pockmarks with pus dripping off them are the kind of thing that shows up in your nightmares. Your dick gets hard looking at that? What are you gonna do if you catch it too?"
"She's not a carrier right now, so there's no way I'd get sick. And even if Yu Bi really did have leprosy, the chance of infection would be almost zero."
"This little shit really talks like he knows everything, huh? What are you, a physician?"
Not a physician — a civilized person. But as Yu Bi had said, to the ancients it would look like excessive generosity.
"It's not her fault she got sick, is it? And I've got a little shallow knowledge on the subject — there's absolutely no chance of it spreading to me."
"Hup... is that so? But I've felt this for a while now — you know so much, Do Yeop, and you seem so well-versed in the state of the realm. You seem like someone who could accomplish great things..."
And yet all you think about is crawling under someone else and living in quiet contentment, is that it? I was the one who couldn't understand why a mere waiter was so obsessed with ambition.
"Kill him!"
"...?"
That was when it happened. With the lightning settled, a human voice carried through the rain. The problem was the word it used — nothing ordinary about it.
"W-what is going on?"
"How should I know... maybe a fight broke out outside?"
But it was the middle of the night. In modern Korea people might still be belting out "Sex on the Beach" at full volume, but here, once the sun went down you couldn't see an inch in front of your face, so everyone went home.
Tremble, tremble...
Yu Bi shook harder than she had at the lightning. She never took her eyes off the entrance, tongue darting out to wet her dry lips.
"If you're that worried, I'll go check the situation."
"Ah... I couldn't possibly ask that of you, Do Yeop. If it really is a fight, as you said — what would you do then?"
"But you're this frightened, so I want to be of some help, at least."
"Hup... for my sake?"
Apparently moved by my somewhat sweet words, Yu Bi cupped both cheeks again and flushed with shy embarrassment. Not that I particularly wanted to risk my life out on the street either.
Still, Yu Bi had been so good to me that I wanted to repay her in some small way. And more than that, watching her check the entrance every night, trembling with fear, was just pitiful.
Drip, drip...
So I stepped out into the rainy street. At least the moon was waxing toward full, so I could make out what was right in front of me.
Tremble, tremble...
But I was afraid too. If this was a blade fight, it was no ordinary situation.
"Die!" — thunk! stab!
"...!?"
What the hell was that just now? "Die" was one thing — but that sounded like metal cutting through meat.
Rumble...
Then from beyond the alley, nearly twenty burly men burst out all at once.
Every last one of them carried a spear or sword, and from those blades — drip, drip... red blood was falling.
I'm fucked. I never thought I'd hit [Game Over] right here!
I should have just quietly waited for sunrise in the stable. Even now, I needed to run for my life—
Whip!
But the retreat was already cut off. Blocking my path was a small but solidly built figure...
A woman.
"Huh?"
"Who the hell are you?"
She glared at me with fierce, bulging eyes as she asked. The massive blade in her hand was pointed straight at my throat.
"I-I'm a waiter who works at Chwiwharu over there. It got noisy outside, so I came out to see what was going on..."
"A waiter? Perfect timing, then. We need to host the young master — go inside and bring out some wine."
"What?"
She's not going to kill me? This rough-looking girl was suddenly talking about a young master and ordering me to open a shop that was already closed.
It was a little bewildering, but the only way to survive this was that one option. I nodded at once and ran for Chwiwharu.
I told Yu Bi what was happening, then came back out and lit the lanterns. Soon enough — rumble... led by the woman from before, nearly twenty of them stomped in, shaking the rain from their clothes.
"This way, if you please, young master."
There was a man the woman was attending with great deference. A handsome man with the sharp, predatory look of a wildcat.
Even to my untrained eye, the silk robes he wore looked top-tier. He swaggered over with a loose, rolling gait, grabbed the center table with a thud, and sat down.
"You! Bring the young master his wine and side dishes right now!"
The woman ordered on the man's behalf. Yu Bi, thoroughly flustered, whispered in my ear.
"What do we do? We have no dishes left."
"Haa... I'll figure something out with whatever ingredients we have."
I had never really cooked professionally, but years of living alone meant I could manage simple food. I used the ingredients without holding back and put together a spread for twenty.
While I cooked, Yu Bi carried the wine jars. But the woman from before blocked her path.
"What the hell are you? Aren't you a leper? How dare you show your face in front of the young master?"
"Ah... I am deeply sorry. But according to Do Yeop, I am not contagious, so..."
"Shut it, you bitch! Not you — send out that guy from earlier."
Yu Bi didn't make a peep and retreated to the kitchen. I roughly explained the cooking method to her, then carried the wine jars out in her place.
"You there."
That was when it happened. The leader of the group — the man — suddenly spoke to me.
Half-suspecting, I pointed at myself with a finger and answered.
"M... me?"
"Your name's Yeop, is it? How long have you worked here?"
"A little over ten days."
He didn't even look at me properly, just spinning his wine cup in lazy circles as he asked. Arrogant as hell and thoroughly annoying — and yet the swagger was so thick I found myself staring in spite of myself.
"Has Yuan Benchu been by recently?"
"Yuan Benchu... you mean the legitimate heir of the illustrious Yuan clan, the family that produced Three Excellencies across four generations?"
Shing!
That was when it happened. I had only answered the question put to me — and suddenly all twenty of them drew their weapons. Hey, what the hell is wrong with you people all of a sudden?
"You crazy bastard... what did you just say? Yuan Benchu is what? The Yuan clan's legitimate heir?"
The woman demanded, furious. At the same time — slide... the man lifted his tilted head.
The hand holding the cup was trembling. He looked at me with a viper's eyes, as if he might sink his teeth into my throat at any second.
"Say that again."
"..."
I have a feeling [Game Over] hangs on whatever I answer next. I calmly turned the situation over in my mind, then chose the reply he would most want to hear.
"Yuan Benchu... you mean that lowborn bastard son who dares claim to be the Yuan clan's legitimate heir and drags the family name through the mud?"
"..."
The man said nothing, only curling one corner of his mouth upward. Apparently I had gotten the answer right.
At the same time — beep! — a status window appeared for the first time in a long while.
"..."
Wasn't this supposed to be the [Female DLC]?