Chapter 6 - The Peerless Beauty Scouts for a Sucker!
"Alright, let's go! This is the true debut of Yeonhwa, 32nd Sect Leader of the Divine Maiden Sect!"
Half a day had passed since I'd boldly shouted that and coolly parted ways with the Moyong siblings.
My grand declaration and ironclad resolve felt utterly hollow as my historic first foray into the jianghu was already mired in serious crisis from the very start.
"...Where the hell is this? Which way do I even go?"
The sun had long dipped below the western mountains, and thick darkness blanketed everything. Only the forlorn moonlight in the sky faintly illuminated the dense forest path where I stood.
That's right. I was lost.
I had no clue which backwater corner of the martial world this was, or which direction—east, west, south, or north—would lead me to an inn or some village.
Thinking about it calmly, it was only natural.
In my previous life, I'd been a modern guy rotting in his room reading wuxia novels. After reincarnating here, I'd been cooped up in that stuffy cave, practicing martial arts nonstop.
All Master had taught me was the basic lay of the land's power structures, some shallow common knowledge, and martial arts. Nothing about geography or maps existed in my head.
The horrifying reality that I knew jack shit about this world only hit me after the sun had set.
"No way... I'm an absolute peak master who's even undergone Hwangol Taltae, and now I'm lost right out the gate, about to camp in the woods?"
I stood alone under the moonlight, pressing a hand to my forehead.
Thanks to this body's absolute peak martial prowess, I wouldn't get mauled by wild beasts or freeze to death, but for someone who'd declared her debut so dramatically, this was a total flop.
I'd posed all high and mighty, like some aloof absolute expert of mercy in front of the Moyong siblings just a bit ago.
Grrrrumble.
And to top it off, my stomach let out the most honest—and embarrassing—growl.
Hwangol Taltae didn't mean I could live on dew. If anything, watching the siblings' incestuous romp from behind that tree earlier, lost in my solo masturbation trance, had left me hungrier than usual.
"Sigh... Should've spared one of those Heuksanchae bandits back there."
In wuxia novels, third-rate mountain bandits were perfect punching bags for the protagonist and great guides.
My hands, which had so stylishly blasted them away with palm strikes in my epic entrance scene, now filled me with bitter regret.
"No clueless bandits passing by with a truckload? If just one showed up, I'd beat the crap out of him and drag him by the collar to show me the way."
I scanned the pitch-black forest path pathetically, muttering to myself.
It was the birth of an absolute master more desperate than anyone for a vicious villain to threaten the jianghu's peace—a truly contradictory existence.
How long had I trudged along the forest path like that?
Grrrrrrumble.
Just as my stomach lining was about to stick to my spine, a scent utterly foreign to the forest's earthy smell—but lethally enticing—wafted in on the wind, tickling my nose, now hyper-sensitive from Hwangol Taltae.
Sniff sniff... Hah! Th-this is?!
I froze in place, flaring my nostrils like a hunting dog.
The savory aroma of meat frying in pork lard. And the thick, spicy tang of booze stinging my nose.
"This smell is 100% it. Civilization! The taste of civilization!"
My salivary glands exploded mercilessly. I bolted in the scent's direction with eyes blazing, unleashing my lightness skill like I was possessed.
Whoosh!
Kicking off the ground and bounding through the branches like a beast, it took less than half an incense stick's time before the dense trees parted, revealing a wide clearing.
And smack in the center stood a massive two-story wooden building, its lanterns blazing brightly against the darkness, exuding grandeur. A weathered flag hung at the entrance, its bold characters fluttering in the breeze.
[Yongmun Guest Inn]
"Found it! The flower of wuxia—the hub of info and crossroads of encounters! An inn at last!"
I clenched my fists in感動. My chest swelled at finally reaching this iconic symbol of the jianghu.
The name Yongmun Guest Inn sounds ominous, like a bloodbath or swordfight's brewing... but hey, if I just eat and bounce, what could go wrong!
Laughter, clinking cups, and the torturous scent of frying meat poured nonstop from the wide-open doors.
"Whew, okay. Calm down. As Sect Leader of the Divine Maiden Sect, I can't drool like some bumpkin. Stride in gracefully, toss silver on the counter, and say, 'Boy, bring your best room and dishes.' That's the wuxia rule."
I straightened my robes, secured the bundle on my shoulder, and cleared my throat with a loud ahem.
Just as I stepped grandly over the threshold—
Hold up.
I froze mid-stride, one foot on the doorsill like a stone pillar.
The crucial prop for my perfect entrance scene flashed through my mind like lightning.
...Do I have any money?
Cold sweat trickled down my spine.
I frantically patted my bosom and loosened the shoulder bundle.
Inside were only the sect's lewd "treasures": a grotesquely thick jade rod, leather straps for binding, the Magnetic Blood Jade that vibrates wildly with qi infusion...
Master had left plenty of manuals for Hwangol Taltae and these bizarre toys for lonely nights.
But not a single copper coin or silver piece.
The inn reeked of meat, my stomach thundered for food, and all I had were sex toys.
"Master... you damn jerk... At least leave your disciple some pocket money...!"
My historic inn debut was kicking off with the grim crisis of being flat broke and scheming for a free meal.
As I stood dazed at the threshold—
"Welcome...!"
A busy server, towel over his shoulder and clearing empty bowls, spotted me and started his greeting cheerily—then froze.
His eyes widened like saucers, his jaw dropped, and the towel hit the floor.
"...Gasp."
He gawked like he'd spotted a fairy fresh from the heavens, forgetting to breathe.
Seeing that dumbstruck face sparked an idea in my brain.
Oh yeah. I'm drop-dead gorgeous right now.
I'd been an average dude in my past life, so I hadn't fully grasped it.
This perfect body from Hwangol Taltae: plump breasts and slim waist peeking through sheer pink silk, flawless milky skin, dizzyingly pure features that steal men's souls.
I tilted my chin up smugly.
Phew, this popularity. The bandit leader was drooling earlier, and now even the server boy's turned to stone at first sight.
Suppressing a grin, I set my very impure, brazen plan in motion.
Think about it, Yeonhwa. Back in my old life, at internet streams or hunting bars, hot girls just sat there and guys footed the bill for food and drinks. In this drab wuxia world, an untouchable peerless beauty like me?
Yeah, no money? Pay with my body... nah, my face! Broke beggar or not, with this world's-top beauty as my weapon, no reason to starve!
I strode confidently inside.
The noisy first-floor hall fell silent like the tide receding.
Men clinking cups and tearing into meat all snapped their gazes to me in unison.
One dropped his chopsticks; another choked on his drink, coughing.
"Wh-what is that woman...?" "Insane. How can a person be that stunning?"
Basking in the ecstatic murmurs like BGM, I halted gracefully in the center, scanning the men like a hawk hunting prey—quick and subtle.
Alright, let's see. Who's my first sucker... er, glorious first sponsor!
First: Corner by the window.
A lone man in a deep-worn bamboo hat, drinking solo.
Pass. Broody lone wolf types are 99% broke posers.
Second: Central table.
A rowdy gang of burly ronin, shirts off, yapping loudly.
Pass. They'd make me serve drinks all night or get handsy after one meal.
Third: Prime spot by the stairs to the second floor.
A flashy young noble in silk robes, fingers dripping with gold rings, table groaning under pricey dishes. Two grim bodyguards stood behind him.
His spread: glossy roast duck, huge dumplings, premium booze.
Bingo.
I cheered inwardly.
Rich, showy, and primed to melt for a pretty girl—textbook golden sucker!
Slide into his table, flash a smile and a hum, and that duck leg's mine for sure.
I curved my lips into the world's deadliest smile.
Perfect. Target: that rich sucker's wallet and meat sides!
My pathetic past-life male ego had long evaporated before the greasy meat scent.
Before extreme hunger, screw pride—channel a nine-tailed fox vixen for survival!
Okay, time to glide up gracefully and work my magic?
As I turned boldly for the stairs, my happy simulation spinning—
"Hohoho! Lord Seomun, kept you waiting?"
A thick, sultry purr rang out as someone plopped into the seat beside him.
...What the hell is that?
Seductive eyes dripping allure, red robes clinging to her curves with every step, hips flaunting their fullness as she sat. A woman screaming "I'm here to fleece this sucker" with her whole body.
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My inner male ego nearly gave her curves a point—then boiled with rage at the stolen meal.
No way! I claimed that sucker first! No code of honor in the jianghu? Stealing my mark?!
I halted at the stairs, biting my lip.
"Oh, Miss Soyoyo. Good privy trip? Thought I'd die waiting."
"......"
The lively inn froze icy cold.
Even on a date, toilet talk at the dinner table? Rich but zero tact—classic thick-headed golden boy. Sure enough, a vein popped on Soyoyo's pretty forehead with a twang.
"Ho... hohoho... Yes, Lord Seomun. Quite~ well."
The so-called Seomun Cheol just guffawed cluelessly, wrapping an arm around her plush waist. Watching, I deflated with a sigh.
Damn, foiled. He had company. A nine-tailed vixen rival no less— no duck for me there.
Even as a peerless beauty, I wasn't diving into a catfight over someone else's table.
My grand meat plan crumbled before takeoff, leaving me hollow.
"Um... miss."
Then the starstruck server from earlier approached cautiously.
"The first floor's full, so if it's okay... you might need to share a table."
He stammered, eyes darting between my face and my heaving bosom through the silk, cheeks flushing as he gulped.
Heh, being a woman gets me these sticky stares too.
Snickering inwardly, I followed his pointing finger across the first floor. My eyes lit up.
"Share a table?"
Those words flipped the switch in my disappointed brain.
Wait... share? No seats, so I have to squeeze into an empty spot?
I whipped my head up to Seomun Cheol and Soyoyo's prime table. A four-seater, them side-by-side—two chairs empty across! Piled with uneaten delicacies!
Kukuku... This is it! Perfect excuse!
Not me pushing in—inn policy forces the natural join. Screw ethics! A thick, wicked grin spread on my lips.
To the flustered server, I whispered in a voice like jade beads on a silver tray—clear and melodious.
"I see. Such a shame no seats. No helping it, then."
I geared to rush Seomun Cheol's table upstairs. But that line's ripple was bigger than expected.
Crash! Thud!
"Hey! Seat here's empty, miss! Come here!" "Bullshit! Get lost, you!"
The first floor erupted into chaos.
Men bewitched by my looks flipped at "share," madly clearing their tables.
One kicked his buddy off mid-bite, wiping the chair frantically.
Even ronin without tables mobbed me, bellowing.
"We'll stand—come here, miss!"
...The classic inn brawl scene? I'm hot, but this much?
The floor turned into a powder keg over me, swords half-drawn. I gawked blankly.
Damn, beauty's a hassle. How do I reach that upstairs mark now!
The racket of spilling bowls and rattling scabbards drew Seomun Cheol's head over the railing.
"What's the commotion below? Some fight to watch?"
Scanning the mess, his gaze locked on me at the center.
"...Gasp."
His eyes bugged out, jaw dropping, wine cup shattering on the floor.
His hand on Soyoyo's waist froze.
He glanced at me, then her, then me—emotions flashing: shock, awe... and change of heart.
And then...
"Get off!" "Kyaa!"
He shoved Soyoyo—clinging to his arm—away ruthlessly.
She rolled with a shriek, but he ignored her.
"Young master?"
Soyoyo stared in disbelief, but his focus was elsewhere.
He half-stood, nodding to a bodyguard.
"You! Escort that fairy... no, that miss below—politely! I'll give her my whole table—bring her now!!"
His desperate, perfect shout from above made me cheer inwardly.
Yes... yes! Meat for dinner tonight!
My deadly inn free-meal op was rolling smoother—and louder—than planned.