Chapter 88
Chapter 88
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Translator: penny
Chapter: 88
Chapter Title: 16. Love and Admiration
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While I was asleep, I spent a lot of time in dreams. For a while, I rested locked in darkness, then gradually adjusted my body's mana—whether consciously or unconsciously—through the dream world. Once that was done, I sent my exhausted mind and body back into the complete unconscious darkness.
How much time passed like that? When I opened my eyes, my room looked the same as always. I blankly looked around my room, then soon erased all the magic that had been protecting me and blocking others' approach. It vanished, centered on the ring that had served as the medium for the mana.
I fiddled with the ring around my neck, then opened my phone to check the time. I thought maybe a lot of time had passed since I'd been so exhausted. I vaguely remembered what happened in the dream, but time flowed differently there than in reality. But when I checked my phone with that in mind, I was startled. The time displayed on the screen was this:
『January 7th, 1:40 PM』
……What?
I widened my eyes. The last date I remembered was definitely December 13th or something like that. But what day was it now?
“January…?”
My voice echoed emptily in the room, giving me a sense of reality.
‘Did a whole year pass while I was sleeping?’
I started to make a dazed expression but snapped out of it. In the world, I'd been asleep that long? Then my parents must have been terribly worried. What about my friends? Exams? I'd missed nearly a month of school.
As I thought that and hurriedly tried to leave the room, the door suddenly burst open, filling my view with familiar faces. They called my name.
“Eunha!”
“E-Eunha! Are you okay?!”
Mom, Dad, Auntie Seona, Uncle Jeongmin, my friends, and even Teacher Jeong Junhwi and Teacher Min were there.
I widened my eyes at everyone standing before me. Then my gaze stopped on Teacher Jeong Junhwi. It was because the situation right before I fell asleep came to mind.
‘Come to think of it, it was Teacher Jeong Junhwi who taught me how to read emotions. And he's a detection-type mage, and he definitely has magic that can read memories to some extent, just like me…’
As those thoughts continued, Inha rushed toward me with eyes that looked like she was about to cry.
I panicked for a moment but soon calmed my expression and placed my hand on Inha's body. But at that instant.
‘Thank goodness she's awake. She won't reject me now. Thank goodness. Thank goodness…’
A voice filled with worry rang loudly in my head. I flinched and wavered, but I tried to comfort Inha first. Her warm emotions reached me directly in my heart, so I felt no repulsion at all. However… unfortunately, my detection ability didn't stop there.
My consciousness sank lower. Something came into view. I jolted in shock and pushed Inha's body away. I instinctively realized what it was the moment I saw it. It was deeper than thoughts or feelings—‘memories.’
“……! Ah…….”
“E-Eunha…?”
I realized I'd pushed Inha away and made a flustered expression. Inha looked at me with teary eyes. Not knowing what to do, I fidgeted and bowed my head. Right then, everyone's voices filled my head. I tightly closed my eyes and clutched my head. It hurt, and it was noisy.
“Eunha, what's wrong? Are you hurt somewhere?!”
“She just woke up after almost a month, so of course something hurts. Maybe get her something to eat…”
But fortunately, as I tried to suppress it, the voices gradually faded away.
‘Thank goodness. It was worth sleeping. The mana has calmed down too…’
However, control over the ability was still unstable. Now, upon contact, it tried to read even the deepest parts of the mind. I could no longer endure this.
I soon lifted my head and opened my mouth. First, I was starving, so I asked Mom for food.
“Mom… food. Make me porridge… I want abalone porridge…”
At my request, Mom looked startled, then opened her eyes wide with joy and turned around.
“Huh? Yeah! Got it!”
“And…”
I watched Mom head out of the room, then looked at the others in front of me. I glanced up at Teacher Jeong Junhwi for a moment, swallowed hard with a tense breath, and said.
“Sorry… but everyone except Teacher Jeong Junhwi, please leave…”
What? Everyone looked surprised or flustered, but I endured my pained feelings and stared firmly at them all. Hansu frowned and tried to approach me but stopped upon hearing my words.
“Eunha, you just woke up, and suddenly what…”
“Sorry. I'll explain later… if I can. Hansu. Inha, sorry. It's because I have a problem with mana control right now… that's why…”
“Ah, okay. You have to tell us this time for sure. We promised before. To share the important stuff. Got it? Promise.”
Inha approached me as she heard my words. I looked at her offered pinky, then nodded. Truthfully, I didn't want to. Telling them I could read minds now, and having to touch Inha at this moment when my detection ability had deepened even more.
How would Inha react if she found out? I knew my friends wouldn't reject me outright. But even so, wouldn't they feel anxious, wondering when I'd read their minds? But I also knew I couldn't hide this forever. At least this was a magic world, which was fortunate. There were plenty of mind-reading spells.
I hooked my trembling finger with Inha's. At the very least, I controlled my mana with extreme sensitivity to prevent reading memories. Right after, I quickly pulled my hand away from Inha's finger and sent everyone out of the room. Soon, only Teacher Jeong Junhwi and I remained in the room.
The noisy room fell silent in an instant. I tried hard to pretend I wasn't hearing the mind's voice whispering directly into my head. I pressed my brow with my index finger, trying to calm the rampaging detection ability. Thanks to the long sleep, the voices quieted down somewhat. Around then, Teacher Jeong Junhwi spoke.
“What happened?”
I stopped pressing my brow and lifted my head.
“From what I confirmed with my detection ability, your mana has already calmed down. Yet you're still anxious. But the truly strange thing isn't that… it's that you calmed the rampage all by yourself without anyone noticing. For someone with control as excellent as yours, why would you suddenly go into a rampage…”
“Teacher…”
I quietly opened my mouth. I hesitated for a moment on where to start, but soon asked him.
“You're definitely a detection-type mage, right?”
At my words, Teacher Jeong Junhwi made a puzzled expression but answered.
“Yeah.”
“And you specialized that detection talent to create a spell. You said you can read minds if you want, right?”
“Yeah. Precisely, it's a special ability of my wind magic. But why?”
“Teacher. It's true that my mana control isn't working properly right now.”
The mana itself was properly controlled inside my body. But from my perspective, this was no different from the control not obeying.
It was the first time in my life that an ability activated on its own without my wanting it.
At my words, the teacher's expression hardened. I turned the question around.
“Teacher, do you remember?”
“What… no, more importantly, what do you mean control isn't working?”
“When you first taught me illusion magic, do you remember? You said illusions manipulate people's minds, so you need to be sensitive to emotions, and sometimes even read memories and thoughts.”
“…….”
“I honed my detection talent just as you said. At first, I saw the colors of mana. Then the flow of mana became clearer and clearer. Now, the flow of mana shows even shades depending on its intensity. I can sense it enough to copy and use spells. Next, I saw the source of mana. A cluster of mana burning inside the body. Each person's was slightly different in shape, but generally similar.”
I calmly continued, recalling the process so far. As I spoke, Teacher Jeong Junhwi's expression filled with puzzlement. At the same time, he realized the meaning of what I said and looked amazed.
“Next, I saw the flow of emotions. At first, I noticed that mana shook differently depending on emotional fluctuations. Then I saw the colors of emotions. When touching hands, I could feel what kind of emotion it was. Emotions have different colors per person, and different feelings per color. But I could instinctively pierce through those emotions. Like scattered paint, spray, clouds, or mist around a person…”
Then Teacher Jeong Junhwi, who had been quietly listening, seemed to realize something and widened his eyes.
“No way…”
“But one day, noise-like sounds started coming. At first, I thought I was hearing the sound of mana. But one day, I realized that wasn't it. The whispering noise gradually grew clearer and became distinct voices. I…”
I bit my lip. Then, with downcast eyes, I spat out the words.
“I can read people's minds now.”
Even now, I wanted to cover my face with my hands, hide my expression, and curl up somewhere, so I kept gripping my hands tightly. I was anxious and scared, but maybe I should have consulted before it got this bad. Reading minds felt like such a bad thing, so I tried to suppress it inside, but mind-reading magic itself wasn't that rare. However, even so, if it was an uncontrollable ability…
I lifted my head and practically begged Teacher Jeong Junhwi. The calmness until now had all been fake. Of course it was.
“Teacher, what should I do? I read minds. But I can't control it. I keep hearing mind voices even when I don't want to. It comes clearer from people with weaker mana.”
“Eunha…”
“I know. In the magic world, mind-reading isn't that rare. But Teacher, that's only in spells! I-I read people's minds without casting magic. This time, I found out that contact reads memories too. I-I…”
“Eunha. Calm down. Say it slowly again like before!”
I closed my flinching eyes and covered my mouth with my hand. Hoo, hoo, I took short deep breaths. With eyes closed and head bowed, I continued.
“The first time I read minds… my friends treated me normally, sincerely, preciously… but knowing I was reading those feelings made me feel so guilty I couldn't help it… And the detection ability kept growing stronger, the minds clearer, countless voices and emotional sensations confusing my heart and head… Getting so anxious made the mana growing and settling inside my body unstable too. So, I-I just wanted to rest deeply and fell asleep. With barriers up, just sleeping. I had no idea it'd be nearly a month…”
Anxiety made my chest and stomach ache, but I kept my head bowed and eyes closed. I couldn't open them.
“I read Teacher's mind too… Sorry. B-But… I'm trying my best not to hear now. No, even before. But no matter what, it only quiets down somewhat…”
Then I felt warmth on my cheek. My cheek was pulled, and my face lifted up. I reflexively opened my closed eyes. Right in front of me, Teacher Jeong Junhwi's eyes gazed at me through his glasses' lenses.
“Calm down. It happens sometimes.”
I widened my eyes. My lips trembled as I spoke.
“It happens… sometimes…?”
“Yeah. Young kids whose mana is growing often can't control their magic properly. Special abilities born from talent growth not being controlled properly happens sometimes too. Especially if it's related to the mental side. So you don't need to feel that bad about it.”
“B-But… this is unpleasant, right? My friends, if they knew… they'd feel really uncomfortable. Especially since it's not magic but a special ability from detection talent…”
“You think those guys would?”
I flinched at his words and bit my lip.
“I… know! I know but… but still, sudden doubts in the heart are unavoidable…”
“From what I see, you all believe whatever the other says. Especially Hansu and Inha—they'd swallow anything you say.”
“W-Well, Hansu and Inha are like that for sure…”
I trailed off and looked up at Teacher Jeong Junhwi with a strange expression. He looked down at me and smiled. Then he brought his forehead close to mine. Thunk, our foreheads bumped.
“Don't worry about useless things and focus on controlling your ability. Why stress over every little thing? Mental special talents are hard to calm easily, so you have no choice but to steadily work on it. You can't help it. If you fret over every detail without letting it go, you'll get stress illness and collapse before controlling it. No, you already did.”
I looked up at Teacher Jeong Junhwi with shaking eyes. Knowing I'd calmed, he released the hand holding my cheek. Déjà vu hit me from that, so I rubbed my forehead and absentmindedly muttered.
“Teacher Min and Teacher Jeong Junhwi… you really are siblings…”
“What? Why suddenly?”
“Teacher Min did this to me before too. I thought you were alike in this way…”
“What… It works on kids, after all.”
Even as he said that, Teacher Jeong Junhwi frowned slightly, surprised by my words. I let the incoming inner thoughts flow in one ear and out the other.
I always seem to be indebted to Master Minah and Teacher Jeong Junhwi. I lowered my head and said this time.
“And people with girlfriends don't do this.”
“…….”
Teacher Jeong Junhwi looked at me with an exasperated expression this time. It was a silly thing for me to say too. I bowed my head and laughed like I was crying. Teacher Jeong Junhwi eventually stroked my head affectionately, as if relieved.
After that day, I began serious training to control my detection ability during the break. This fact wasn't just told to Teacher Jeong Junhwi but also to Teacher Min, my parents, and even Master.
Mom looked lost upon hearing it, Dad seemed puzzled like he couldn't understand, and Auntie Seona frowned as much as she could.
“If that's the case, you should have said something right away! School is for magic training, so if it's a special ability issue, you can take leave for external classes! Meeting anyone unprotected in that state… if you encountered something weird, you could go into shock and need mental treatment!”
“Yes…….”
“Anyway… for now, don't meet the kids! Mirae will understand, and keep some distance from your mom and dad too. For the time being, only meet me—who can't be read—and that teacher who can teach you detection control… and your personal tutor Minah! Got it?”
“Yes…….”
Then I got severely scolded by Master too. She glared at me with an extremely cold expression, then pinched and pulled my cheeks as hard as she could. Only after I screamed in pain did she release her hand and yell loudly.
“Do you even properly know I'm your master? What were you going to do hiding it from me, your master!”
“Ugh…….”
“Anyway, so timid… Starting tomorrow, Junhwi and I will take turns teaching, so come here diligently. Or just stay here for a while.”
“No… even so, I couldn't…”
“Well, your parents must be worried too… anyway, kid who only stresses me out…”
“…….”
This time, there was truly no room for argument.
Also, Teacher Min got completely sulky and openly ignored me like a child for a while. But whenever I went to Teacher Jeong Junhwi's or Master's house, she was always there. Teacher Min's sulk melted away after I apologized a few times saying sorry. Really, I hadn't noticed before, but Teacher Min has such a cute personality.
After starting serious training, I frequented Master's house or Teacher Jeong Junhwi's house almost every day. Midway, friends came worried about me, but Auntie Seona pushed them away, and I earnestly asked my parents not to contact me for a while. It was almost isolation level, but in this situation, it was unavoidable.
As Auntie Seona said, with the ability unstable now, more than a certain number of people was poison. Instead, I messaged my friends in advance that I couldn't meet face-to-face for a while due to ability control issues. They were very worried or inconvenienced, but I really had no choice.
I wanted to be someone who could protect the trust the kids gave me, as much as they trusted me. For that, this uncontrollable detection ability was poison to me and to them.
Fortunately, during break, I didn't need to go to crowded places like school, so it was perfect for focusing on embodying control. From Auntie Seona's attitude, even if it wasn't break, she seemed like she'd contact the school directly for leave.
However, the first thing I did when going to Master's for training was, oddly enough, training to handle the ability better.
Not just training to control and contain the ability, but literally to increase skill—testing its limits, what it could do.
Honestly, I didn't understand. After all, controlling it was already overwhelming. Wouldn't mastering this headache-inducing ability just give me more headaches? But when I asked, Master said this.
“It's an ability you have anyway, so shouldn't you use it usefully? And as the saying goes, know yourself and your enemy, and you'll win every battle. Knowing your ability well makes control easier.”
It was certainly true, so despite my slightly anxious expression, I had no choice but to nod.
However, that didn't mean I neglected control training for a while. The two trained control alongside it. They taught as many necessary methods as possible.
“Eunha, you probably didn't meditate properly because your head hurt from the detection ability? Meditation is important for managing mana and calming the mind. Do a lot of meditation starting today.”
“Got it? For this type, maximum mental stability is key. You can do it quickly once you get the knack since it's you, but ‘sight’ and ‘sensation’ are different. Don't try to control the mind with the eyes' sensation. That's something you must firmly remember.”
According to Master and Teacher Jeong Junhwi, the most important thing was ultimately to first calm the mind. And they emphasized that visual sight and sensing feelings are completely different.
Hearing that, I thought, then. If emotion colors are ‘seeing,’ and reading minds is mentally ‘sensing,’ then. I decided to control the ability using illusion or dream manipulation techniques. It worked much better.
‘Control methods differ by ability type. Just like… mana.’
I'm so used to control that I do it thoughtlessly, but mana control methods differ slightly by attribute. It's a sensory difference, but you feel it when sensitively controlling. Special abilities seemed the same.
As time passed, my detection ability, which had been extending wildly, gradually calmed. Very little by little, but I felt the results with my whole body's senses. And at some point, I ‘ah’ realized it. How to control the detection ability.
It was a sensory thing indescribable in words, but ultimately, the key to it all was the ‘imagination’ that moved the mind.
Anyway, I got the knack. Then it was easy. Less than a week after getting the knack, I tried controlling the detection ability. However, it still wasn't perfect.
“But now that the voices don't come, it's enough.”
“If it's not perfect, in what way?”
“When touching… something like seeing things. Like psychometry.”
“Psychometry? Mental measurement? What's that?”
I realized at Master's question. ……Ah, right, this world has no ‘superpower’ concept. Spell names vary by country and language. So psychometry isn't a universally known term.
I thought for a moment, then changed my words.
“Like image magic or thought wave magic?”
“I see…….”
I worked to control even that. I didn't meet friends directly at all until perfectly controlling it, and didn't say a word about this training. Naturally, I avoided contact with parents as much as possible.
Winter break ended like that. Even between winter and spring break, I didn't go to school.
And at the end of February that year, I succeeded in controlling the detection ability.