The Time of Witches (28)
I had been convinced he was Changhee's older brother, Lee Changguk. Yet a corner of my mind still refused to let go of the lingering doubt: Could it really be him?
The Lee Changguk I'd met for barely ten minutes had worn a cold, hostile aura. Because of that, watching the woman beside Kim Minjun act all cute and flirty made me question whether she could possibly be the same person.
"You said you've only been working here a short while? Where were you before? I know most of the spots around here, but I don't remember seeing you."
"This is my first time at a trans bar. Before that, I did a little part-time work at a crossdressing café. The madam who came by as a customer sweet-talked me into coming here. Hohoho…"
At his words, even Boyoung, who was sitting beside me, burst into giggles.
"These days, crossdressing cafés are full of pretty, talented CDs. Every now and then one of them gets scouted. Gukhwa here is one of those cases. A dragon rising from a ditch, you could say. Hoho…"
"Oh my, it's funny hearing you say that. Why don't you tell them how the Prince of Jongno became the Princess of Itaewon? Hoho…"
Every time I came to a transgender bar, I noticed the same thing: their banter had a strange charm. It sounded crude and vicious, like they were tearing each other apart, yet the way they cackled together had a way of making you laugh along. Even their dirty jokes somehow felt warm and familiar once you got used to them.
I laughed along with the jokes, but Lee Changguk's previously stiff image made it feel surreal to hear such playful teasing coming from his mouth. The thought that Lee Changguk and "Gukhwa" might not actually be the same person kept tormenting me.
"You worked part-time at a crossdressing café? So you were holding down a regular job and doing gigs on the side."
As if sensing my confusion, he kept firing off questions, clearly trying to pin down something that would confirm his suspicions.
"That's right. But then the company suddenly went under. I couldn't tell my family I'd become unemployed overnight. How could I say something like that to parents who rely entirely on my paycheck? I did get a small severance payment, so I pretended I was still getting a salary and gave them money little by little. Eventually I ended up coming here, since it's the one world I actually know something about."
As he drank the liquor Kim Minjun kept offering and spilled everything without hesitation, my head began to throb. At this point, I was almost certain that "Gukhwa" was Lee Changguk. I couldn't say one hundred percent certain, but… almost. The only difference was that he'd replaced his wife and son with his parents in the story. Overall, it matched Lee Changguk's situation almost perfectly. I doubted anyone here could have come up with such a close approximation by chance.
Even so, I couldn't bring myself to declare it with absolute certainty. A question still remained. Mira had said Lee Changguk had taken unpaid leave, yet he claimed his company had gone bankrupt. I regretted not looking into it further. If his company really had collapsed, I could have confidently declared that Gukhwa was Lee Changguk.
I decided I would verify the facts tomorrow, no matter what.
"But from what I know, the tips from table service alone aren't enough to live on comfortably. Wouldn't it be hard to support your parents on that? You know what I mean, right? Hehe… Or maybe I'm asking because I want to take you for a second round? You're surprisingly charming. I like it. Hahaha…"
"Oh my, thank you, oppa. I'm truly honored to hear you say that. Hoho… I'll do my very best to serve you well."
Kim Minjun looked at me with a grin. When he saw my eyes widen, he simply shrugged. From his perspective, he'd only casually suggested a second round, and the fact that she'd accepted so readily seemed to say, Don't blame me.
And honestly, how could I blame him? I'd heard it wasn't common for someone to agree to a second round on the very first meeting. The fact that Gukhwa had accepted so readily made me wonder if he'd also heard the rumors that Kim Minjun spent money freely. Or perhaps she was simply obsessed with earning even one more penny.
If she'd truly come this far for money, it was obvious she wouldn't be picky about using her body. He gave Gukhwa a generous enough tip that she wouldn't feel slighted and postponed the second round. Knowing I was against it, he ultimately chose to leave with me.
"What are you going to do about her?"
After we saw off Boyoung and Gukhwa, who had followed us out to the front of the store, he lit a cigarette and asked.
"What do you mean, what am I going to do?"
"Now that her identity is basically confirmed, shouldn't you tell your friend? Isn't that why you didn't give me a chance tonight?"
"I do have to tell her. But… she's changed much faster than I expected. It's making me hesitate. I don't even know if telling her is the right thing to do."
"It doesn't seem like something worth agonizing over that much. In the end, they're all the same as the room salon girls. It's either money or sex."
While I stayed silent and stole a drag from his cigarette, he continued.
"Unless they're using surgery as an excuse to make money, they're the type who enjoy sex by making full use of their femininity. The funny thing is, once they start that way, they eventually end up wanting both. Huhu…"
As he took the cigarette I handed back and took a long, satisfied drag, I spoke this time.
"Then, in your eyes, which type is Gukhwa?"
"She's both. Huhu…"
"Ugh, you're ridiculous."
I tried to laugh it off, but my expression grew serious. His face was telling me he was completely sincere, so I couldn't laugh.
"If you want me to prove whether I'm right or not, shall I? I can find out if she really came here to make money or not."
I had no real authority in the matter, yet I hesitated. It felt like I was standing in the way of his lust simply because the person was Changhee's brother. After watching "Gukhwa"—who was undoubtedly Lee Changguk—flirt and act coy with all sorts of men for nearly two hours, I still couldn't accept the idea of him being defiled. Even though I knew full well he'd probably already given his ass to dozens of men, I still thought he shouldn't. I felt ridiculous.
"In my experience… there aren't any men who come to a place like this just to make money. If they wanted to earn cash in this scene, they'd go to a host bar instead. The chances of someone like that ending up here are probably one in a million. And if what she said about the madam bringing her in is true, then she's been radiating that charm for a long time already."
"What do you…"
"Earlier when the music was loud, we were whispering a bit. She told me she'd been crossdressing since high school and learned the taste of men during her military service. Considering how these girls usually shave a year or two off their age, it's safe to say she's known the taste of men for at least five years."
I felt my legs go weak. Changhee had enlisted at twenty, so if Lee Changguk was two years older, that meant he'd already known the taste of men ten years ago. A wave of pity for his wife—whose face I'd never even seen—washed over me. Pity for his son followed right after.
"The madam at Cinderella isn't ordinary. She doesn't just pick anyone. It means Gukhwa isn't the type who could live an ordinary life."
"Still, there are plenty of gay men and lesbians who get married, have kids, and live normal lives. They just enjoy men on the side sometimes…"
"Of course there are more people like that. It's the same on our side. You know that more than half the people who come to Delma are either married or have boyfriends, right? They just hide it and keep living that way. No matter how much you wash it off, you can't clean the inside. And crossdressers are even worse. They enjoy the delusion that they're women. Once those types get a taste of men, there's no stopping them."
I couldn't ignore or refute his words. They came from experience, and I didn't doubt that his experience was far richer than anything someone like me could even imagine.
"Let me confirm it for you. If you won't accept me, at least let me hold her once. I'll be able to find out more."
Without realizing it, I bit my lip hard. I took the cigarette he offered and said,
"Oppa, your ulterior motives are written all over your face. Just be honest. You like Gukhwa, don't you? Huhu…"
"Yeah, I won't deny it. I hadn't been interested in trans women for a while, but this one really caught my eye. Hahaha… This is partly your fault too. You dragged me into this. Hahaha…"
He let out a laugh as handsome as his face. I laughed along with him. But it was hollow. Despite how hard I'd tried, it seemed nearly impossible to turn "Gukhwa" back into Lee Changguk, Changhee's brother. All I could do was let out a bitter laugh.
People had said Changhee possessed a mysterious charm. It was fascinating to hear that "Gukhwa" had it too. I didn't know how much charm Lee Changjun and Lee Changguk had when they were living as men, but it was truly amazing that both Changhee and Gukhwa clearly had it. And the fact that lesbians were so drawn to them made it even more bizarre.