Chapter 82
Translator: RaidenTL
Chapter 82
Before they knew it, it was one in the morning. After spending a long time at the bar, the three of them finally rose to leave.
Kang-ho was sad to see them go when they still had so much to talk about, but Yeon-ju promised she would visit again soon and stepped out of the bar.
Hae-young hung up with the designated driver, who was just arriving. She pulled Yeon-ju toward the car. "Let's wait inside."
Yeon-ju glanced over at Eun-seong, who stood a short distance away. In front of the quiet, empty street, Eun-seong gave her a small wave.
"Get home safe."
"Yes. I'll get going, then."
"Call me when you get there."
Call me when you get there.
Yeon-ju hesitated at his words. Agreeing felt like accepting a relationship where they worried about each other, where they spoke at the end of every day. She couldn't bring herself to say yes so easily.
"Actually, never mind. I'll call you. Go on."
As if reading her mind, Eun-seong corrected himself. Without much of a reply, Yeon-ju simply bowed her head and followed Hae-young into the car.
With a click, she buckled her seatbelt, the strap settling snugly across her chest and lap. Only then did Yeon-ju lean her head back against the headrest. She knew Eun-seong would still be standing outside if she looked out the window, but for some reason, she couldn't bring herself to look.
"The driver is almost here."
"Yeah, Unni."
Hae-young glanced down at her phone from the passenger seat. Hearing the sudden hollowness in Yeon-ju’s voice, she glanced back at her.
"Did you give him the USB?"
"…Yeah."
"Good. You did the right thing."
She had handed him the USB drives just as they were getting up to leave. Two of them.
To Eun-seong, who had silently asked what they were with his eyes, she had only said to check them when he had time. Keeping her eyes closed, Yeon-ju spoke.
"Unni. I don't know if I did the right thing."
"About what?"
"He and CEO Min have been together for a long time. I feel like I'm destroying all of that."
"The choice is his to make," Hae-young said, letting out a short sigh as she stared ahead. "You just gave Eun-seong the right to know."
"I just hope he doesn't lose his mind when he hears that CEO Min slapped you. Though, if he's going to snap, I'd rather he snap completely."
Yeon-ju squeezed her eyes shut. Once he listened to the files on the USBs, he would learn so many truths. Why she had left him all those years ago. Why she had woven a web of lies and ended things by ghosting him. Why she couldn't bring herself to contact him with a clear conscience.
Of course, the process wouldn't be easy. It would probably be even harder than she could imagine.
…It felt as if she couldn't breathe.
Wouldn't this be better than us breaking up?
His weary gaze, his thin voice—they told her he was lost and wandering.
There had probably never been a moment in his life when he didn't shine, never a time he had fallen flat on his face. But because of me, someone who just dropped into his life, he’s been thrown completely off course.
You, who had only ever walked on a path of flowers.
"Oh, right, Yeon-ju. A few days ago, Eun-seong went to your workplace, and it made the news. It was a whole thing, wasn't it?"
"Ah, yeah. He came by."
"He even took photos for them, right? The shopping mall put up pictures of him. Is that okay? I guess it must be, since they posted them."
"He took them and told them they could use them for commercial purposes."
"Really? Apparently, they sold twenty thousand mufflers that day. That shopping mall hit the jackpot."
As Hae-young, who was deeply invested in the fashion industry, rattled off the details, Yeon-ju raised her eyebrows. It was freelance work, so she could have quit anytime, but Eun-seong had left those photos as a favor when he took her away.
The gesture seemed far too generous for the situation, and Yeon-ju sighed quietly. Still, she was glad no scandal had erupted. No one there had even thought to connect her and Eun-seong.
It was a relief, but also a little bittersweet.
"I still don't know how he found out about that place, though. I was so shocked."
"…"
Suddenly, Hae-young fell silent. Yeon-ju, who had been sitting still, leaned forward slightly and tapped her shoulder.
"Did you tell him, Unni?"
"No way! Do I look like the kind of person who would just blab about something like that? I'm not someone who leaks information easily, not even to Im Eun-seong."
Her voice was incredibly forced. Yeon-ju narrowed her eyes.
"You told him."
"No, really, Yeon-ju. Think about it. Why would I just give away such high-quality information?"
"…"
"He promised to buy me a bag."
Eun-seong had bribed Hae-young with the promise of a designer bag.
"If it were just any ordinary bag, I wouldn't have even listened. But it's a limited edition! Even I have a hard time getting my hands on one, and he said he'd get it for me."
"…"
"It was the devil's temptation. I'm sorry."
Eun-seong had bribed Hae-young with a bag—one of only ten in the entire world—in exchange for Go Yeon-ju's location.
Having learned the whole story, Yeon-ju let out a low sigh. "Oh, honestly…" she muttered, leaning back against her seat. Hae-young glanced back, flashing a sheepish grin to head off any real anger.
"I'll let you borrow it once I get it."
"No thanks. Where would I go carrying a bag like that?"
"For a walk. To the park in front of your house."
"I'm fine. You enjoy it. I guess it was a profitable trade, though."
"Right? You think so too, don't you? Ugh, he'd better give it to me. I'll sue Im Eun-seong if he doesn't."
She couldn't shake the strange feeling. If it was a bag even Hae-young couldn't get, it must have cost an astronomical amount. To think he had made such a deal just to find her somewhere in Seoul.
"Yeon-ju, wave to him. He hasn't left yet. He's still standing there watching us."
At Hae-young's words, Yeon-ju slowly opened her eyes. Just then, the designated driver arrived, and she impulsively looked out the window.
Standing a short distance away, as if to separate himself from them, Eun-seong kept his eyes fixed on the car. The windows were heavily tinted, so he probably didn't know she was looking back.
"Hello! We're heading out now!"
Leaving him always made her anxious, no matter the circumstances. As the car began to pull away from the curb, Yeon-ju hurriedly rolled down her window.
When she waved, urging him to go inside, Eun-seong nodded. Then, he raised a hand to his ear, gesturing that he would call.
As the car turned the corner, Yeon-ju found herself nodding back.
Go on in. I'll call you.
Parting from the connection she had so desperately clung to.
Yes.
But not in this lifetime.
*
After getting out of Hae-young's car, Yeon-ju went inside her house.
Dragging her alcohol-heavy body into her room, she set down her bag. She took off her coat, then her socks.
Even as she removed her earrings and tied back her hair, her gaze remained fixed on her phone.
Go on in. I'll call you.
She didn't let go of her phone as she went into the bathroom to wash up. Even as she turned on the hot water and lathered soap in her hands, she kept glancing at it. She kept thinking she saw the dark screen light up, repeatedly lifting her soap-covered face to squint at it.
She washed up faster than usual and stepped out of the bathroom. Draping a towel loosely over her head, she poured herself a glass of cold water and walked into her room. After wrapping her hair tightly in a microfiber towel to absorb the moisture, she sat down at her vanity. Even as she applied body lotion and rubbed cream onto her face, her eyes remained locked on her phone.
Bzzzz. Bzzzz.
"…It's him."
Looking down at the vibrating phone, Yeon-ju muttered. Although she knew the call was coming, a sudden wave of heat washed over her. She picked up the phone, which was buzzing noisily against the vanity.
Normally, she would dry her hair next, but that didn't matter now. Clearing her throat, she answered the call.
"Yes. Hello?"
Her voice was as straight and composed as her posture.
—Did you get home safe?
"Yes. I just got in and washed up. And you, Actor Im?"
—I'm home too.
With every echo of Eun-seong's voice, the room grew warmer. She could feel the affection in his ordinary questions, and his simple curiosity brought her a wave of happiness.
—You must be tired. You drank a lot.
"I'm fine. I paced myself toward the end."
—A pro, I see. Pacing yourself.
As Eun-seong murmured, a small laugh escaped Yeon-ju. Then, she caught sight of herself in the mirror and wiped the smile from her face. The involuntary laughter, the thought I'm happy automatically playing in her head—it all felt incredibly dangerous.
"I should go to sleep now. I'll hang up."
Yeon-ju drew the line once more. She was terrified of her heart crumbling so easily, afraid her poorly made mask would fall to the ground and shatter, never to be worn again.
—Yeon-ju.
In the deep of the night, she felt herself being pulled into a world that could be heaven or hell.
"Yes."
—Are you afraid I'll fall apart?
"…Yes."
—Until now, I've run forward with only success in sight. To succeed, I had to live a pretty complicated life. Living the way you're supposed to is harder and more exhausting than you'd think.
Success required so many formulas. Since he couldn't afford to miss a single one, he had to live every moment on edge. Not everyone who worked hard succeeded, but most successful people were those who put in the effort, both in public and in private.
—But after living like a madman, working non-stop, I realized something. The more complicated your life is, the higher your chances of success. But conversely, the simpler it is, the happier you become.
…Ah. A soft gasp escaped her lips.
—What comes after success is a sense of accomplishment. It's a long way from the word 'happiness.' If you confuse the two, your life eventually becomes lethargic. Because success isn't happiness.
Her heart beat so hard it felt like it would burst. She felt as though she finally understood what she had been missing, the reason for her emptiness.
Simplicity. Yes, simplicity.
—I think I'm going to look for my own happiness now. Not the happiness of the actor Im Eun-seong, but of the human Im Eun-seong.
Dismantling my emotions, tangled like a complex circuit.
Stripping away the fabricated hypotheses, erasing the negative thoughts, and scraping off the filth that clung to everything.
The essence that had been hidden for so long was finally revealed—
And for the first time, I could see it for what it was—
—I hope you'll stop tormenting your own life now, too. Though I know it won't be easy.
It was his wish, his hope, to be with me.
"If you keep… if you keep giving me courage like this, what am I supposed to do…?"
Yeon-ju muttered, as if she had nowhere left to retreat. Could she endure it? Could she escape to a world where he didn't exist?
Was there even such a place left for her?
"It makes me want to be brave. It makes me want to run to you. What are you trying to do to me…?"
—I was just talking about myself. I just wanted to share my thoughts.
Her deeply buried desire, her true feelings—that simple love began to stir.
Yeon-ju tightened her grip on the phone. She had a premonition that when this night faded and the sun rose, she would meet a completely different version of herself.
—Good night, complicated Go Yeon-ju.
The lie that had been her master for so long dissolved into tears, knowing its reign was coming to an end.