Chapter 81: Can't You Just Tell Me to Take Responsibility?
Translator: RaidenTL
Chapter 81: Can't You Just Tell Me to Take Responsibility?
A dull ache began to throb in her chest. Yeon-ju closed her eyes slowly, then opened them.
She had thought her life had made her quite accustomed to pain, but on days like this, it stung with the intensity of a fresh scratch on tender flesh. A wound like this, its shape and depth immeasurable, would surely linger. It would never fade or wash away, remaining forever in some corner of her heart.
"Don't give me an answer based on the calculations you've been making alone for ten years. Don't give me an answer born of your anxieties about a future that hasn't even happened. Now that I know everything, just tell me to take responsibility."
"..."
"I don't care about any of that. Just tell me to take responsibility. Can't you just... just say that to me?"
In that moment, Go Yeon-ju felt a fleeting spark of joy. She felt happy. Swallowing dryly, she struggled with the contradictory emotions warring inside her—feelings that had no right to coexist.
"You weren't the only one frantically pouring your heart out that day. What I babbled to you is a blur to me, too. The only things I can vaguely recall are words of regret."
"..."
"When I said I had no intention of taking responsibility... I didn't mean it."
He wasn't raising his voice, yet it cracked. His chest burned so hotly it felt as if his airway were on fire, and Eun-seong downed his drink. He felt only its icy temperature; he couldn't taste or smell a thing.
"Once my emotions settled, I was finally able to see you. I felt a surge of anger at being deceived, but I think that anger wasn't directed at you. It was directed at myself."
The words he had kept bottled up for so long filled the quiet space between them.
Yeon-ju slowly closed her eyes. Submerged in a wave of sorrow, her ears began to ring.
"Of course, it won't be easy. Even if we prepare ourselves and steel our resolve, it will probably be harder than we can imagine."
"..."
"But... I think it would still be better than us parting ways."
As his voice, heavy with deep regret, drifted into her ears, tears threatened to spill from her eyes. Keeping them shut, Yeon-ju tried to steady her trembling breath.
The lively voices of the staff bustling about the bar drifted into the room from time to time. Trivial details—which table had ordered more drinks, who had asked for another side dish—were the only things filling the silence between them.
"I'm sorry."
"..."
"I don't think I'm a very brave person after all."
The words were so bitter her tongue felt heavy.
Yeon-ju steadied her wavering heart, returning to the conviction that had governed her entire life. She couldn't impulsively upend her life over a few words from him. Knowing how difficult and painful it would be, she couldn't just take her child's hand and walk down that path as if nothing were wrong.
"I won't ask you to cut ties completely. If you could just see Han-byeol once in a while, like you do now, I would be grateful enough. Just once in a long while, when he's about to forget. Just like that."
"Go Yeon-ju."
"Just keep living the way you always have. Why are you trying to walk such a difficult path? Why?"
Her eyes, glassy from the alcohol, were shot with red. With a gaze brimming with unshed tears, she pleaded with him.
"You said you wanted to step down gracefully when the time came. You said you took pride in having an acting career free of scandals. But now, what? Are you going to tell the world, 'Actually, I have a child who was born ten years ago. I only just found out, so I'm going to try being a father now'? Is that what you're going to say?"
"..."
"Who would believe that? Who would ever believe you? How would the public know if we broke up because I kept quiet, or if you abandoned your child to chase after success? Are you going to explain yourself every single time? You can't. It doesn't work that way."
Yeon-ju shook her head. It was impossible.
"Fine. Let's say we somehow get through it. But what about our Han-byeol? What about our little boy, caught in a storm of rumors and speculation? He's already shot a movie. With his face up on the screen, people will say, 'That kid is Im Eun-seong's son. Is he really his biological child? Did Im Eun-seong put him in the movie on purpose? Did the kid really not know he was his father? Was the kid in on it, too?'"
"..."
"We won't be able to dodge any of it. It's not about what happens to me. You, Han-byeol... neither of you will be safe."
No matter how hard she tried to steady her breathing, or how tightly she clenched her fists and avoided his gaze—
"Let's not go down that path. We already know what's waiting for us, so we don't need to walk it. I really, truly don't want to. I won't. I'd rather let my heart crumble, let my insides burn to ash, and just live with the pain. No matter how much I think about it, that's the best way."
"..."
"Please. Okay?"
It was impossible for him to look away from her as she pleaded so desperately.
Eun-seong picked up the bottle. With one hand shoved in his pocket, he poured himself a drink and filled Yeon-ju's glass as well. He tapped his glass against hers, which still sat untouched on the table, with a soft clink.
Downing his drink in one gulp, Eun-seong looked at her. He gave her a gentle, reassuring smile, as if telling her she could stop begging.
"Do you remember what I told you once? I said that from now on, I would protect what you want to protect."
What Go Yeon-ju is trying to protect with all her might... I want to protect it, too.
On that late night, she could still hear his voice echoing.
"Yes. I remember."
"Now, I want to protect Han-byeol just as much as you do. The boy you've cherished and protected for ten years... I'll protect him from now on. You just watch."
"..."
"The fact that Han-byeol is my son will never change. But you... if I don't hold onto you, we'll end up as nothing. So just trust me, and take this step with me."
Fearing they were going in circles again, Yeon-ju pinched the bridge of her nose and spoke defiantly.
"Why do you keep ignoring what I'm saying and—"
"Are you listening to me? I thought this was a time for both of us to say our piece."
"How on earth are you going to take responsibility for Han-byeol? How will you protect him when you can't even look after yourself?"
"It's always easier to meddle in someone else's life than to fix your own."
Eun-seong picked up the empty bottle and gave it a little shake, offering her a questioning look that said, Another? Yeon-ju nodded.
Yes. No. Their opposing arguments remained locked in a stalemate.
Yet, there was one thing they shared—
"Still, it feels good to talk to you honestly like this. I feel like I can finally breathe."
"Me too. It feels like a weight has been lifted."
They were both deeply, desperately in love with each other.
* * *
Haters and Fans
As they continued to drink in the quiet lull, the door suddenly swung open and Hae-young walked in.
"What's with this cozy little setup?"
Hae-young entered with a sharp, assessing glare, causing a startled Yeon-ju to jump to her feet. Eun-seong, who had invited her, gave a small wave.
"Don't start a fight. Just sit down."
"I can't help it whenever I see you. It's my new favorite hobby."
Wait, what? Hearing them speak so casually, Yeon-ju looked back and forth between Hae-young and Eun-seong in surprise. Hae-young took off her coat, sat down, and looked around the room.
"So this is your hideout?"
Hae-young seemed unfazed by the secret layout, a testament to her years in the industry. Yeon-ju, glad to see her unexpected guest, offered a warm smile.
"Unni! You're here."
"Oh, she's drunk. Yeon-ju, are you tipsy?"
"No, I'm just really happy to see you."
As Yeon-ju giggled, Hae-young looked at her with fond affection, as if watching a puppy roll onto its back. Then, she whipped her head toward Eun-seong, her eyes narrowing instantly. The change in temperature was staggering.
"So, why did you call me here?"
"To take her home."
"Did you seriously call me here to be your chauffeur? Me? Jin Hae-young? Why don't you take her home yourself? Oh, wait, you can't, can you? Afraid of getting your picture taken?"
"What are you talking about? My car is a two-seater. It's impossible to fit three people once we hire a designated driver."
"Ah. A two-door. Yeah, that would be a problem."
Hae-young backed down instantly, her expression softening. Eun-seong poured her a drink, and Hae-young turned her attention back to Yeon-ju.
"Yeon-ju, did things go well? How much is the kid's father offering for a settlement?"
"U-Unni..."
"Ask for a massive sum. He's loaded. Actually, scratch that—demand a division of assets. Think of all the effort you put into raising Han-byeol, and look how wonderfully he turned out! Tell him to hand over half."
Eun-seong let out a dry chuckle. Yeon-ju, her face turning pale, frantically tugged at Hae-young's sleeve.
"I suppose the only way to shut you up is with alcohol."
Eun-seong raised his glass, gesturing for her to drink. Hae-young, her eyes still narrowed, clinked her glass against his.
But before taking a sip, she made sure to get one last word in.
"Make sure you calculate it properly. We won't accept a penny less than a fifty-fifty split, so you'd better have that money ready. Do you have any idea how much it costs to raise a kid?"
Eun-seong set down his empty glass and wiped his lips. He changed the subject with a casual remark.
"You know, when brainless people talk, I usually just nod and say, 'Sure, whatever you say.'"
"And? Why are you bringing that up when I'm telling you to pay proper child support for Han-byeol?"
"Sure, whatever you say."
"...Why, you little—"
When Hae-young finally caught his drift and shot him a glare, Yeon-ju burst out laughing. Hearing her bright, clear laughter, Hae-young glanced at her. Sensing that their conversation must have gone well before she arrived, she let out a quiet sigh of relief.
"Our model employee, Go Yeon-ju, will be rejoining us starting from the next shoot, so get ready. You can clap now."
"Wait, really? Seriously?"
Hae-young clapped her hands excitedly as she asked. She could be surprisingly obedient at times like this.
As Eun-seong finalized the decision on their unresolved discussion and made it official to Hae-young, Yeon-ju looked flustered.
But Hae-young welcomed the news with a bright smile.
"Oh, that's wonderful! We're absolutely swamped right now, Yeon-ju. You made the right choice. Seriously, thank goodness."
"Is it really okay for me to return? I feel so shameless..."
"Yeon-ju, does shame put food on the table? I'm busy enough to die over here. If you feel bad, just come back and work twice as hard."
She went on and on, describing how difficult things had been and what the atmosphere on set was like lately.
Watching Hae-young chatter away without a single pause, Eun-seong tilted his glass. Yeon-ju kept smiling at Hae-young's endless complaints, and she looked so beautiful laughing that he didn't want to interrupt.
He wished they could talk like this for a long time. He wished she would laugh even more.
The night deepened.