A Kiss Better Than Kissing
Once the situation had finally calmed down, what came back to me was Mary's sorrowful sobbing.
“Ugh! Waaah!!”
“……If you cry too much, your face will swell up.”
“I don't care about that! We can't date anyway!”
Probably the saddest she'd ever cried in her life. It must have been agonizing to have her pure feelings trampled like that, but mixed in were resentment toward me and bitter self-mockery.
“What is this? I thought you liked me too, but actually, you'd date just anyone who confesses first…… This way, I'm the only one who's suffered for liking you all this time! How am I supposed to get compensated for my ten years?!”
Of course, after liking me for ten years, she'd cling to the regret of not being able to date me. I felt no small amount of guilt myself, having done something like that despite knowing her feelings.
“I feel like there might be a misunderstanding, so let me clarify.”
Still, I thought this part needed correcting, so I tried to clear up what Mary had gotten wrong.
“Soeun and I aren't dating or anything.”
“What?”
“It's true. Right, Soeun?”
“Yeah. Not yet……”
Mary blinked in stunned silence at my words, her face blank as if she couldn't comprehend them. A hollow voice leaked from her lips.
“Then…… what was that kiss?”
“Soeun said she wanted to.”
“Just because she wanted to? And you did it multiple times, just because she wanted to?”
“Yeah, that's all it was……”
-Thwack! My head drooped from the punch that followed immediately. But that wasn't enough to quench her anger; Mary's fists kept raining down on my head repeatedly.
“You call that an explanation, you idiot!? How can you casually allow that kind of skinship with someone you're not even dating, just because they say they want to!? Are you a pervert!? Does it not matter as long as it's a girl!?”
“C-Calm down, Mary. At least this way, it's somewhat fortunate for you……”
“Like hell it's fortunate, you trash!!!”
Mary even started stomping on me as I crouched down. I figured I couldn't dodge her attacks like usual and just took them, until my body ended up a crumpled rag on the floor.
Whether it was her extreme rage or the strength she'd gained from puberty, either way……
“You moron. To think I liked a guy like this? You're not even dating, but you do that over and over, and you call it fortunate……”
Even so, her anger didn't subside; she kept swallowing her fury repeatedly. Then, Soeun, who had been watching silently, quietly voiced her doubt toward Mary.
“If you're not dating…… is it not okay?”
“What?”
“We just did it because we wanted to……”
A genuine question, utterly unaware of what was wrong. To Mary, who still held proper, chaste notions, the innocent words of this pure girl must have come as a massive shock.
“You think it's okay just because you want to? I……”
“Mary…… do you want to?”
Mary flinched violently. Realizing she'd hit the mark, Soeun spoke bluntly.
“Then…… you think it's okay too. As much as you want…… like me.”
“N-No, you can't just say it that easily……”
It was something that couldn't help but raise ethical issues. Yet her body trembled faintly, as if tempted despite herself—proof that her disappointment hadn't killed her feelings entirely.
Yeah, she still likes me.Maybe she'll hold onto that feeling forever.
“Then…… shall we try it once?”
Recognizing that, I suggested it softly. Mary let out a dazed breath, as if not understanding my words.
“W-What?”
“Soeun said it's okay if you want to. Besides, if it helps resolve your lingering regrets, that might be good.”
“D-Don't talk like you're granting some mercy. You've already done everything with her.”
“I told you. We're not dating.”
It was just a few kisses, after all. It might hold symbolic meaning in the world's eyes, but it was a stretch to call it something only lovers do.
“Since we've already done it without dating, maybe once more wouldn't hurt.”
No matter what came after, if she didn't have those feelings right now, resolving the regrets might be fine. If it could serve as atonement for not accepting her heart sooner, even better.
“……Do you want to?”
“Huh?”
“You asked about my feelings. So it's only fair I ask yours. Say it with your own mouth. Not what I want from you, but what you want from me.”
Did I really want skinship with Mary? I'd never thought about it before, but now, having resolved through Soeun not to run from feelings directed at me, that resolve meshed with the time we'd spent together, making me feel her pure heart intensely.
“Yeah. Right now, I do.”
Expressing my honest intent to accept her that way, Mary trembled as she slowly approached me.
“F-Fine. Then, as a special favor…… Her Highness Mary herself is granting you her lips, so cherish it as the honor of a lifetime!”
Even after all this, she still wanted to act tough. Well, clashing hearts like this meant the act was providing some comfort.
For that, I quietly closed my eyes, relaxed my body, and stayed still, ready to let her have as much skinship as she wanted.
And after quite some time, the faint sensation on my lips faded.
“F-Fine, that's it!”
Mary stepped back abruptly, ending it. I couldn't help but blurt out in a dumbfounded expression.
“What…… was that just now?”
“W-What do you mean? It was a kiss! Lips to lips……”
Too embarrassed to say it outright? Clutching her mouth and bowing her head, Mary soon puffed up her confidence again, trying to act dignified.
“W-Whatever. You got it, so be grateful! This is me, Mary Christine, giving you my first experience!”
Sigh, even when given the chance, she's like this.She'll regret it later and do something rash.
Thinking that, I closed the distance with Mary and pulled her body into a tight embrace.
“W-What are you doing…… Mmph!”
I pressed our lips together, pushing in to make the mucosal sensation vivid. Surely beyond what she'd imagined for skinship. But I didn't stop there, pressing her further.
Bending her waist back, naturally parting her lips……
“Mmph, ah, ngh……”
As I directly poured my saliva into her mouth with pressure, her trembling resistance soon vanished, her body going limp.
About a minute later, I pulled my lips away.
“Hah…… How was it? Satisfied now?”
“Uh…… huh?”
A dazed expression and ragged breaths. Mary, soul seemingly scorched and unable to grasp what had happened, belatedly clutched her lips and flushed red.
“W-Wha…… wha…… What did you just do!? What the hell was that!?”
“French kiss. You don't know?”
“Fre…… French…… what?”
Oops, she's still such a girl in this regard. I couldn't help but chuckle softly before asking Mary.
“So…… did you hate it?”
“H-Huh?”
“Was what I did too much?”
“Ah…… waa……”
Her face beet red, Mary wore a flabbergasted look. She twisted her body, covering her face as she grumbled accusingly.
“P-Per…… pervert. Where the hell did you learn something like that? How much…… how much have you been doing while I wasn't around……”
I did have experience. Just once, in my previous life, with one person.
“No, you're actually the first for something like this.”
But in this second life, no need to dwell on the past, so I could say that. Mary widened her eyes again, staring at me.
“W-W-What?”
“I said it's the first time I've gone this far.”
She'd grieved over losing her first, hadn't she? So I figured something more intense was right—something sticky and lover-like, not mere physical contact. If she truly wanted that kind of relationship with me.
“How about it? Once more?”
“N-No!! How could I do that again!!”
At my casual suggestion, Mary jumped back, turning away. But clutching her face showed how unexpectedly intense it had been.
At least her regrets seemed gone now—small mercies.
“K-Ki…… ss……”
But only for a moment. Realizing someone had been watching, she turned, and I caught sight of Soeun hiding her flushed face.
More intense and deep than what she'd done, it must have felt overwhelmingly burdensome to the girl just awakening to reason, lingering like an aftertaste.
“Kissing…… is so embarrassing, huh.”
“W-What!?”
“Watching made my heart…… pound.”
Soeun clutched her even redder face at Mary's outburst.
“Suddenly…… the kiss feels embarrassing.”
“Y-You can't say that now! Aah, what is this!? Now I feel like an idiot for just getting mad!!”
At that reaction, Mary yelled in frustration, and I let out another soft chuckle.
“Then…… does this settle the incident for now?”
Yeah, with this, neither would fall into a tragic future, I thought.
“No, wait. I didn't hear something important.”
But apparently something was left. Mary stopped me as I tried to leave, glaring as her excitement faded.
“Even if you're not dating, you took two girls' purity and just walk away? Were you always such an irresponsible guy?”
“Th-Then what should I……”
“Me…… or her?”
Ah, right. That question was inevitable.
“You kissed her because you like her too, right?”
“……I won't deny it.”
“And you did something even more intense with me, so you like me too.”
“Mm…… yeah, something like that.”
“That means you're thinking of dating one of us, right?”
“……”
Of course it'd come to this. Hoping to ease the conflict even a little, I glanced at Soeun, but she'd already shaken off her embarrassment, gazing at me with intense interest.
“If we date…… we can do more than kissing, right?”
“Uh…… yeah.”
“Even more amazing things…… than what you did with Mary?”
“……Probably?”
“Then…… I want to date.”
Yeah, it had to end up like this. After kissing, claiming we were nothing was a stretch.
“Same here.”
Mary echoed Soeun's declaration, voicing her own resolve.
“Ten years, you know. Since kindergarten, all I've thought about is being with you. And you peeked into my heart without permission—now you want me to just give up? No way! After all this, I deserve an answer from you!”
Closing the distance as she spoke, Mary asked firmly.
“So say it with your own mouth. Me or her—whatever your answer, I'll accept it somehow.”
“Yeah, me too.”
Soeun closed in likewise, asking me.
“I like you…… and Mary too. So…… I think I can accept any answer.”
Looking back and forth at the two girls courting me, I couldn't help but feel deep conflict in my heart.
My childhood friend, known for over ten years, with whom we'd built so much over that time.
And my seatmate, who'd closed the distance even more aggressively in far less time.
If both their feelings for me were genuine……
Now that I'd finally resolved to love someone, who should I choose?