Mom's Trip
"What?!"
Opening semester was just around the corner. The cicadas that had been screaming all summer were finally dying off and dropping from the trees. Time, which had felt frozen, began to move again as a faint breeze stirred the air. With summer fading, my carefree vacation life was coming to an end.
"Where are you going?"
"Over there. You know, New York."
"Whoa… I'm jealous. I wanna go too."
"Just focus on work."
"When are you coming back?"
"Next Monday?"
"Wow… a whole week…"
Mom dropped the news on us like she'd suddenly enlisted in the army. She was going on a trip with her friends. After working nonstop, she deserved it. Noona probably felt the same way deep down, even if she acted indifferent on the surface.
"Bring back lots of souvenirs."
"Sure. I'll get you plenty of good stuff."
I wanted to go to America too. The only place I'd been abroad was China. China had been fun, but it was close enough that it never felt like a real trip. America, though… the tickets were expensive, and the flight would take at least ten hours. That would actually feel like traveling.
Maybe I should go with Noona someday.
"Jiyun."
"Yeah?"
Once the big announcement was over, Noona called me over while Mom wasn't listening. When I leaned in, she spoke in a voice low enough that Mom couldn't hear.
"Mom's gonna need spending money, right?"
"Spending money?"
"Yeah. We haven't really done anything for her."
"I guess so."
A basic trip to the States cost over a million won. Peak season would make it even pricier. If not now, when would we ever treat her? I still had a long way to go before landing a proper job.
"I'll cover seventy percent. You do thirty."
"Huh? Let's just split it evenly."
"You got that much cash?"
"Enough to give Mom something."
"Ooh~"
Noona smacked me while praising me. Women always hit you when they compliment you. It actually hurt more than I expected.
"I'll be back, Mom…"
"Your flight's at eight, right?"
"Yeah."
Everyone knew you had to be at the airport two hours early, especially for an international flight to the States.
"Mom."
"Huh? What's this?!"
Noona called Mom over and held out an envelope. She'd deliberately put the money in a fancy red one.
"It's from me and Jiyun~"
"What? You surprised me."
"What do you think? Gonna cry?"
"Oh no, I really might…"
"Uh… uh."
I didn't think she actually would, but tears started streaming down Mom's face. She pulled us both into a hug, saying we'd grown up so well.
"Mom, come on~ Don't cry~"
Noona told her not to cry while crying herself. They were probably remembering the old days. I felt a lump in my throat too.
"I'll be back. I'll bring lots of good food. Don't just order delivery every day. I made side dishes, so eat those."
"Okay~ Have a good trip~"
The front door closed. Noona wiped her tears, then punched me in the chest out of embarrassment.
"Oh, right. I gave her a bit more. Turns out it was around one-twenty."
"Really…? That's expensive…"
"Yeah… At least it's not peak season, so it didn't go higher."
When I'd checked earlier, peak season prices easily went over two hundred. Anything cheaper meant twenty-seven-hour layovers on budget airlines. Even those weren't worth it once you added the cost of lodging.
"So it's just the two of us now."
"…What do you mean by that?"
"Exactly what it sounds like. We have to hold down the fort for a whole week."
"Oh~ I thought you meant something else."
"I figured you would."
"…You knew and still said it."
"……"
Five in the morning. Mom had left. The house that had always held three people now held only two.
♠ Day One.
'This is annoying…'
Managing the gallery was more of a hassle than I'd expected. Even though things had calmed down lately, the trolls never disappeared, and people who weren't even trolling kept fighting over whether something was staged or not. There was also the cliquey behavior that hadn't existed before the panty thief incident. I was experiencing what people called "dick-clique" drama for the first time.
'Way too many people trying to WWE and UFC at the same time…'
It just showed how harsh the world had become. Even the slightest brush could turn into a fatal blow.
"I'm home~"
"I'm heading out."
"Huh? You don't start until ten."
"Just saying."
"Ugh."
"You'll be alone tonight."
"Yeah… I guess so."
"Why?"
"No reason."
"…If you're scared, leave a light on in the living room."
Right. She was afraid of the dark. At this point it was obvious something had happened, but she still wouldn't tell me.
"You always complain about the electric bill."
"That's when we're all here… It's fine when I'm alone."
"What if the power goes out?"
"It's not a horror movie. If the lights go out, call me. I'll come straight home."
"Really? Don't pretend you didn't hear me later."
"I won't. I promise."
Noona only allowed the lights to be off when someone else was home. If she hated the dark this much, I couldn't imagine what would happen in an actual blackout.
"Now help me delete some stuff."
"What?"
"You know. That thing."
"Oh, that~ …What thing?"
"…You're the head mod."
"Oh, right."
I knew she was pretending not to understand. I let it slide because she was a working adult.
"Anyway, if you're really scared, come over. I can't rest, but…"
"Okay."
It was almost time for me to leave. Noona went to take a shower. I lay on the bed, spacing out and saving my energy for later.
But then…
"I'm off~"
"Have a good day…"
Why didn't she do anything? Was this really okay?
♠
"Haa."
I was annoyed. Not because I was home alone, but because Jiyun had left without doing anything. Why was he acting so normal? I'd even hinted that we'd be alone. He still did nothing? Yesterday Mom had been here, sure, but she was gone now.
"Ugh…"
Maybe it was because of work? That had to be it. He had to stand for eight hours straight. That would tire anyone out. I should understand.
'But we had two whole hours.'
Two hours was more than enough time to do everything and still rest for at least an hour. No. Seriously. I was hurt. Did he really mean to stop after just once?
—If he could even make one.
Was he actually trying to get a girlfriend? Did he think I couldn't get a boyfriend if I wanted one?
…I couldn't.
'Everyone at work is at least five years older…'
Even if I was open to older guys, three years was my limit. Anything more just didn't click. My subordinates had been the same. Something about our wavelengths never matched, so conversations never flowed. Eventually I'd naturally started eating lunch only with the other female employees.
"Haa…"
I'd prepared so carefully today. Bought sexy underwear, deliberately wore a V-neck shirt…
"Ugh…"
But if I made the first move, he'd probably think I was weird. I wanted him to approach me romantically. He'd said such dirty things that day. Now we were alone, with a motel right in front of us that cost nothing and had no time limit. Why wasn't he doing anything?
'I've gotten so wet…'
I couldn't even vent through the gallery anymore. Everything just kept building up with nowhere to go. How was I supposed to wait until tomorrow? And even if I waited, there was no guarantee he'd come to me first. Had he never seen a comic where the sub-mod gets eaten by the head mod?
"Huu…"
My fingers slipped inside, but it felt so empty. After that day, my own fingers could no longer satisfy me. Something that big had stirred me up inside. How could I be satisfied with just this?
"Ugh, hoo…"
It was all Jiyun's fault. If his dick hadn't been so big, if it had been the same size as my fingers, it would've been better. But now that I'd experienced the best from the start, nothing else could compare.
"……"
I pulled out the toy I'd hidden. It was smaller than Jiyun, but bigger than my fingers, so it would have to do.
"Huu… ugh…!"
Come to think of it, I'd even bought condoms. The fact that I'd put one in my pocket just in case felt pathetic. I should've known better than to buy the expensive ones.
"Hoo… ugh…"
It wasn't enough. I needed both this and my fingers to feel satisfied, but the angle was awkward and it wouldn't even fit. So why could I still hear that squelching sound? Was I making those pathetic noises because I wished Jiyun was the one holding it and stirring me up?
"Ugh, hoo…!!"
I was right on the edge, but I couldn't finish. I needed stronger stimulation. Something that could fill me up completely. Like Jiyun's cock.
"Haa…"
In the end, I collapsed back onto the bed feeling like I'd failed to sneeze. I should go wash up, but it was too bothersome. I should've just done it in the bathroom.
"……Cold."
A sudden chill ran through me. Something felt like it was about to surface, so I quickly got up and took a hot shower.
"Haaam…"
I turned on all the lights in the living room like Jiyun had told me to. I needed to sleep if I was going to work tomorrow. But sleep wouldn't come.
'Should I call him…?'
It wasn't like anything was wrong, but I felt like I had to do something. Still, it seemed like it would disturb him at work, so I gave up.
—If you're really scared, come over.
…I'm not scared. If anything, I don't really want to see him right now. So why was my body moving on its own…
♠
"Haa…"
I'd bought the condoms for nothing. I'd stayed still on purpose because I was worried he'd call me a pervert obsessed with sex if I jumped him first. But the fact that he could act so nonchalant was disappointing. If Noona had given me even the slightest signal, I would've gone right to her. But there had been nothing.
'She didn't lose interest, did she…?'
I'd read somewhere that women's sex drive only increased with age and peaked in their late thirties. That meant Noona was still in the "none" category. She'd posted as a sub-mod, and once that wish was fulfilled, she'd lost interest. Besides, messing around with your own little brother was weird to begin with.
Ding~
"Welcome…"
"One pack of Marlboro Lights, please."
"Sure. ID, please."
"…I left it at home. Can I show you my Instagram?"
"I need to see your ID."
"Just a second, I'll go get it."
Wow. She looked pretty cute now that I was seeing her again. These days everyone sent adults to buy for them. No matter how scary someone looked, their face always gave them away. A college student trying to buy cigarettes.
Ding~
"Welcome…"
"Just one cup ramen, please."
"You can put your ID away."
Noona had come. She was wearing pajama pants with a T-shirt and a cardigan over it—an oddly mismatched outfit. Still, she just looked cute to me.
"…Did you wake up?"
"No. I couldn't sleep. Why?"
"It's one in the morning."
"……Something came up."
"Were you scared?"
"…Yeah."
"Sit over there."
"Okay."
Damn. If she acted like this, how was I supposed to make the first move?