Why Isn't It Working? (2)
"It's okay, it's okay…"
"…"
I collapsed next to Seoyeoni, and she hugged me tight. In her warm embrace, a wave of misery crashed over me.
Failed again. It felt so much better this time—slick and warm. Seoyeoni seemed to sense the difference too, reacting more intensely, and I was rock hard. Feeling a spark of confidence, I tried her favorite doggy style… and it went limp again.
I could get it up fine watching porn, jerking off alone, or even when Seoyeoni used her mouth or hands… Why did it always fail when it mattered most? I had no idea.
"…"
After murmuring "it's okay," Seoyeoni just silently patted my back. She must have been pretty disappointed too. I spotted the condom she'd tossed aside earlier, insisting we didn't need it this time because it was really going to work. Birth control? What was the point when I couldn't even cum—not that I could stay hard long enough to try.
"Oppa, but it still felt good."
"Huh?"
"Doing it without that thing. I could feel you so much better—like, really feel you."
After patting me for a while, Seoyeoni smiled brightly. She had to be disappointed, but seeing her laugh it off like nothing happened made me feel even guiltier.
"…I'm sorry."
Her smiling face hardened.
"No…"
"Huh?"
"I said no…! Don't say you're sorry! I hate hearing that from you."
Seoyeoni's eyes suddenly welled up with tears. Startled by the sudden waterworks, I quickly realized what it meant. She'd been holding it back all this time. She bit her lower lip, fighting to stifle her sobs. I was shocked, but even her struggling to hold back tears was so beautiful that I just stared blankly.
"Don't you like doing it with me, oppa?"
"Seo, Seoyeoni…"
"I want to do it with you! Every single day! Even right now… I want you so bad, so why…?"
"…"
"You researched so much, tried so hard, pushed yourself… I really thought it'd work this time…!"
A single tear rolled down her cheek. Making her cry over this. I had to be the only guy who failed with Seoyeoni like this. Everywhere she went, people told her how pretty she was.
"What about you, oppa? Does it feel bad? Is my pussy… too loose or something…?"
"No, it's not like that at all…"
"Then why does it do this? Look! It works fine if you just touch it or I suck it…!"
Seoyeoni gripped my cock firmly, and like it was taunting me, it swelled right back up.
"See? It is because I'm too loose, right? That's why you can't feel anything…"
"That's really not it."
"What do I do if I'm loose? I heard there's some kind of kegel exercise… Should I try that?"
Her eyes welled up again, brimming with emotion. Seoyeoni was perfect—zero issues. The problem was all me. Self-loathing was driving me insane.
"…"
Looking at her snapped me out of it. This wasn't the time to wallow; I needed to comfort her. I pushed aside the misery and focused on Seoyeoni. Time to be honest.
"Seoyeoni."
"…"
I took her hand and faced her. My reflection shone in her teary, beautiful eyes.
"I've been thinking about this a lot, and honestly, it's my problem. It's like… the pressure's too much for me."
"Pressure…? Am I pressuring you?"
"No, not like that! You're just so gorgeous. Too good for me—way out of my league."
"What are you talking about? Why would I be out of your league? You're handsome too!"
"Hear me out. Anyway, in my head, you're so pretty. It makes me worry someone might steal you away, anxious all the time."
"…"
She looked like she wanted to say something but held back, waiting for me to finish.
"Even when we're doing it, I get this huge urge to satisfy you completely."
"…"
"That pressure builds up, and one slip-up makes me dread the next time. I can't even perform properly, so it just snowballs…"
Emotion choked me up, and my voice cracked. Seoyeoni's eyes went wide like a startled rabbit. Couldn't even do that right, and now I was crying too. Absolute worst. Not manly at all, not a proper boyfriend.
"D-don't feel pressured… Just being with you makes me so happy."
Seoyeoni sniffled, wiping her tears.
"I just… want you to finish with me. Want you to feel good while you're inside me."
"…"
"And satisfaction? I'm always satisfied! Your cock is amazing—so big, so hard, fills me up perfectly! If you go too rough trying to 'do well,' it hurts… This is just right."
She scanned my face, comforting me back, then pouted cutely.
"And steal me away? As if. I'm all yours—don't you know that?"
"…"
Her words gave me strength. She loved me despite my failures, my inadequacies. I didn't get what she saw in me, but knowing she only had eyes for me filled me with gratitude.
"Sorry. You must be hurting the most, and I pushed you too hard…"
"No, I'm the one who's sorry… Keep showing you my pathetic side."
"Nooo~ You're not pathetic!"
She patted my slumped shoulders and burrowed into my arms.
"Right! I'm pretty, aren't I? Who’s the boyfriend of the pretty Seoyeoni?"
"What?"
"Who’s Seoyeoni’s boyfriend~?"
"M-me, obviously."
"Exactly! You've got a girlfriend this pretty. How could you be pathetic?"
Seoyeoni proudly squeezed her pale breasts together, framing her face cutely and hamming it up with aegyo.
"See? Don't be silly, you dummy Kim Minjun~"
My spirits lifted just watching her adorable antics.
"Straighten those shoulders! Shake off that pressure!"
"Yeah! I'll ditch the pressure and keep researching stuff. Gotta fix this somehow…"
"Yup!"
Seoyeoni nodded cutely.
"Tell me if you find anything? I'll help with whatever I can~!"
She beamed with aegyo in her voice.
"It'll all work out~"
Yeah, it would, right? God, I hoped so.
Things didn't change much after that. My dick kept going limp, and Seoyeoni kept comforting me. She said we could take it slow, not to worry too much, but the self-loathing still crept in. I'd let go of the pressure, so why…?
"Oppa! Are you listening?"
"Yeah? I am."
"Doesn't seem like it… Anyway! That monster suddenly burst into flames, right? That was weird. Do Japanese ghosts normally do that?"
Seoyeoni chattered on, munching the last of the popcorn. Even during a normal date, my mind wandered to tonight. We'd definitely try again at home or a motel… What if it flopped? What if it died mid-thrust? Or wouldn't even start? Sigh… The worries piled up already.
"What… You're spacing out!"
"No, no—what should we have for dinner?"
"…Dinner? Hmm~ Something yummy!"
Guess I hadn't fully shaken it off. These worries were all from pressure. I decided not to think about it.
"Anything you want?"
"Chicken? How about chicken?"
"Chicken sounds good."
"Yay~! Chicken and beer! Chimaek!"
Cute Seoyeoni sang "chimaek, chimaek!" I dropped the worries and searched for nearby chicken spots on my phone.
"What is it? Who's that?"
"Oh? A friend from school. Hyeonwoo."
"Hyeonwoo? Sounds familiar."
"You met him once, remember? At the convenience store near my place. Just a quick glance, so probably fuzzy."
"Oh~ Yeah, I remember!"
Seoyeoni nodded like it clicked.
"The tall, handsome oppa?"
"…Yeah, that's him."
We'd run into Hyeonwoo once while buying beer together. Barely said hi before parting ways. Yet in Seoyeoni's memory, he was the "tall, handsome oppa." It should've faded, but… A strange feeling bubbled up, my heart pounding oddly.
"Why's he texting? Something up?"
She looked innocent, just curious since I'd suddenly started texting. Her comment about Hyeonwoo seemed offhand. Fair enough—most guys or girls would say the same about him. Tall and handsome…
"Nah, just asking what I'm doing. Wants to grab chicken together…"
"Whoa! We were gonna have chicken too! What a coincidence?"
Seoyeoni shrugged like it was no big deal. No mention of wanting to eat with him or see him again. Her reaction was natural—we were on a date, just the two of us. I was overthinking it alone.
Still… what was this pounding? Curiosity flooded my mind. Seoyeoni's face when she saw Hyeonwoo. Them greeting each other. Toasting, eating chicken, chatting and laughing. Just imagining it made my heart race even more.
"Seoyeoni. What if we invite Hyeonwoo and make it three?"
"Huh? That oppa too?"
"What do you think?"
"Whaaat~ We're on a date—why three?"
A weird mix of relief and illicit curiosity hit me at her response.
"We're eating anyway. Just dinner, then split."
"Pfft. I wanna eat just with you! But fine, whatever! Been a while since you ate with a friend~"
She shrugged and hummed a tune. I texted Hyeonwoo back, oddly tense.