A Reality Gank Only Takes Three Minutes

Maybe it was because of what happened earlier, but I logged into the game feeling way more worked up than usual.

It was all because that bastard Gyeong-do kept talking nonsense, completely shattering my usual composure.

What annoyed me even more was that the viewers actually seemed to love seeing me like this.

"Real Marriage my foot. I'm going to ban anyone talking nonsense. Mods, feel free to swing the ban hammer if they keep this up."

I was only saying that, of course. I didn't actually plan on banning them. Well, unless they crossed the line.

Anyway, I immediately dashed deep inside. I figured the best strategy was to avoid running into Gyeong-do at all costs.

I slipped into a random room...

*Rustle...*

...and found something there.

If I went back, I'd run into Gyeong-do. If I went forward, I'd run into that monster.

So, what was the best move?

Sneaking past the monster without getting caught.

I slipped into the shadows and began to move as stealthily as possible.

All to avoid that crouching monster.

But at that exact moment...

*Snap!*

The monster stood up.

My body froze, rendering me unable to move. That was when the monster turned ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠around and spotted me.

The monster was a monkey with abnormally long arms and legs, and an incredibly long nose.

"Ooh-hoo-ho-ho-ho!!!"

"Kyaaaaaah!!!"

With a scream that sounded incredibly perverted and suspiciously like Gyeong-do, the monster lunged at me. Before I could react, its swift movements had me pinned.

But that wasn't even the worst part.

I wished it would just kill me, but instead, the monkey hoisted my body up into the air.

"Let me go! Let me go!! Let me gooooo!!!"

Of course, shouting at it to let go did absolutely nothing.

"Ooh-hoo! Oo-ho-ho! Ho-ho-ho! Hoo-ho-ho-ho!!!"

Laughing in a way that sounded infuriatingly like Gyeong-do, this perverted monkey carried me deeper and deeper into the facility.

By the time I finally snapped out of my daze, the monkey had dropped me and scurried off somewhere else.

Leaving me all alone in the deep, dark basement of this factory.

"Huff... puff... What is this... What is this supposed to be...?"

I expected monsters that would kill me or torment me in various ways, but I never anticipated a monster like that.

The problem was...

"Where am I...? Where is this...?"

...I had absolutely no idea where I was.

Well, of course I didn't. It was my first time playing this game.

Wouldn't it be weirder if I knew my way around on my very first run?

I raised my broom again and began to look around warily as I walked.

I would definitely run if a monster appeared, but holding onto this at least gave me a sliver of comfort.

I wandered around, swinging my broom wildly at the empty air.

"Come out... wherever you are... Come out..."

I didn't even know if I was calling out to a monster, Ggumyong, or Marty. Honestly, I just wanted anyone to show up.

Being alone in a pitch-black place without knowing where I was was genuinely terrifying.

Or better yet, I wished a monster would just jump out and kill me. At least then I could give a good reaction for the stream and get it over with.

Taking baby steps, I cautiously pushed forward.

Though I still had no clue if I was heading toward the exit or deeper in.

Along the way, I did manage to find a pretty valuable-looking item.

"Isn't this... worth a lot of money...?"

I picked up the expensive-looking object and carried it with me.

But the item was so massive that it completely blocked my field of vision.

I was already scared out of my mind, and having my vision blocked made it ten ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠times worse.

Tense and on edge, I kept moving.

For the first time, I was genuinely glad I didn't use a VTuber model or a webcam.

My face must have been completely pale with terror.

Right then.

*Thud, thud, thud.*

The sound of footsteps echoed nearby. I cautiously called out.

"Candy... Ca-a-andy..."

It wasn't really a question, but rather our code word.

If there was no response to the code word? It was a monster coming to kill me.

If they answered? It was a human.

Please, someone come get me. Or just kill me already.

With those thoughts swirling in my head, I headed toward the footsteps, repeating ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠the word over and over.

"Candy, candy... Ca-a-a-ndy..."

The moment I turned the corner, I ran into a player holding a spork.

A spork? Why was he holding that?

No, that wasn't the important part.

"Candy... Candy...!"

I repeated the word several times, but no response came.

Instead, he slowly, very slowly, approached me with the spork raised.

I had wished for death just a moment ago, but I quickly changed my mind.

"Kyaaaah! Save me! Help! I'm sorry! Please spare me! Kyaaaaaah!!!"

I wanted to live. I was terrified. I didn't want to get caught.

Just as I began to run away at the top of my lungs—

"Wow, you are such a massive coward."

...I heard a voice that instantly turned my terror into pure rage.

"Hey, you're gonna burst my eardrums. Stop screaming."

"......Gyeong... Dodo?"

"You were about to say my real name, weren't you?"

"I mean... isn't your real name already public anyway?"

"Yeah, but I don't want to hear it from you, dummy."

Hearing him call me a dummy immediately made me feel indignant.

"Dummy? Hey, you're dumber than me!"

"How could I possibly be dumber than you?"

"Your grades in high school were way worse than mine!!"

"That's because I didn't study. If I did, I would've easily beaten you."

"Bullshit."

"Nope, keep dreaming~"

The more I talked to Gyeong-do, the madder I got. My previous fear vanished entirely, replaced by a burning desire to beat him up.

"So, why are you here?"

"Huh? Weren't you lost?"

"Well... yeah, I was... But how did you know that...?"

"I killed a fake version of you that looked way prettier than the real thing."

From what I could gather, a Lumensis mimicking me had recorded my voice saying I was lost and played it back.

Gyeong-do had killed the monster and then came looking for me.

I felt a bit embarrassed that he had caught me showing weakness, but at the same time, a small part of me felt touched.

"Did you come to save me...?"

If he really came to rescue me, I'd have to drop by his place next door right after the stream to give him some snacks.

Even though we bicker all the time, you're the only one I can count on, Gyeong-do. I really lo—

"Nope. I came to make fun of you."

...Right. I was the fool for expecting anything from this ungrateful brat.

"Pwahahaha! ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠You dummy, how do you get lost here? Are you actually brain-dead? Huh?"

"......Gyeong-do, do you actually want to die?"

"Ahahaha! What's that? I can't hear you~! I don't want to hear you either~! Mwahahaha!!!"

I wanted to beat him to a pulp. Genuinely.

"Hey. Wait right there for exactly three minutes."

Unable to hold back any longer, I stood up from my chair.

I slipped on my slippers, grabbed one in my hand, and stormed straight next door.

*Knock knock knock knock knock!*

The moment I pounded on the door, a voice shouted from inside.

"Mom~! Yeon~! Don't open the door~!"

"Mrs. Do~! Yeon~! Can you open up for a second~?"

Gyeong-do's plea to keep it locked versus my request to open it. Gyeong-do's family had only one logical choice.

*Creak.*

They chose to open the door.

"Unni, did Oppa tease you again?"

"Yeah. So, do you mind if I go beat him up real quick?"

"Sure~ Oppa~ Unni is here~ I'm going to my room~"

"Hey, hey!! Do Yeon! Do Yeoooooon!!!"

I patted Yeon, who was slightly taller than me, on the head, then walked toward Do Gyeong with a bright smile.

Do Gyeong tried to lock his door, but he was too late. His room was the closest to the front entrance.

"Hey, Gyeong-do. I hope you're ready to die."

"You crazy girl!!!"

"Just die!!!"

*SMACK!!!*

A full-power back smash delivered with the slipper in my hand.

The sound was incredibly crisp. It was the absolute best—thrilling, refreshing, and deeply satisfying.

Feeling thoroughly vindicated, I headed back to my apartment to resume the stream.

"Everyone~ I'm back~"

Seeing the viewers' reactions filled me with pride.

It was also great that Gyeong-do hadn't blurted out my real name, and that he didn't usually stream with his webcam on.

In other words, there was absolutely nothing to worry about.

With that comforting thought, I prepared to jump back into the game. But...

"Guys, why am I dead?"

Why was I dead?

Before the words could fully leave my mouth, Gyeong-do's voice came through my headset.

"Because you left your character holding a bomb while you came over to reality gank me, you psycho. It blew up."

Ah. Right. The thing I was holding was a bomb.

Come to think of it, I think the item's name was 'Defective Bomb'.

"If it's a defective bomb, why did it explode?"

"Because it's defective, it explodes randomly! Are you actually insane?!"

"I'm not insane!!!"

And just like that, we went right back to bickering.

In that familiar, comfortable way we always did.