Fake Marriage? Let's Do It.
After stuffing ourselves with dinner and topping it off with ice cream, I slumped back into my chair. Yebin, without a care in the world, flopped right onto my bed.
She wasn't just lying down, either. She was thrashing around, kicking up a storm of dust.
"Hey, Lee Yebin."
"What?"
"You're making me dizzy. Can't you just lie still?"
"No~pe! Why~ should~ I? How~ much~ are you gonna pay me!"
She seriously hasn't changed a bit since we were kids. How is it possible that the only thing that grew was her stupidity?
I clicked my tongue at her in disbelief. Right at that moment—
Someone sent me a message.
The moment I checked my phone, Yebin started teasing me.
"Ooh~ Look at our Gyeong-do, such a social butterfly. Or is it... a girlfriend?"
"Please shut your mouth, you filthy human."
"Nope~ Never shutting it!"
Just how childish are you going to get, Lee Yebin?
I always knew she was incredibly childish, but this level of immaturity was definitely not normal for an adult.
Actually, no. She's always been a brat. Thinking about it that way made it a bit easier to accept.
Poor thing. Her mental state has been stuck like that for twenty-three years, which is why she's so childish and crude.
When I looked at her with pity in my eyes, Yebin glared back at me, looking thoroughly offended.
What? I have nothing to hide.
Putting my useless thoughts about Yebin aside, I looked down at my phone again.
I saw a message from my manager.
She was asking if we could have a quick meeting today. I had nothing else to do, so it wasn't a problem.
"Excuse me, Miss Vini?"
"Yes~ Mr. Dodo~?"
Her sarcastic reply came instantly, but I ignored the attitude and got straight to the point.
"Get off my bed."
"Huh?"
"Get out. Now."
"Why? You gonna watch porn or something?"
"Has this girl lost her mind?"
Yebin burst into a fit of giggles at my reaction.
"No, my manager wants to have a quick meeting."
"Your manager?"
"Yeah."
"Did you screw up or something?"
"As if. Do you think I'm you?"
That comment must have struck a nerve, because Yebin immediately marched over and locked me in a headlock.
Squeeze...!
"Aaaagh! Stop, stop!"
Her surprisingly powerful grip felt like it was going to crush my skull. I writhed around, clutching my head like Sun Wukong suffering from the Golden Fillet.
"I'm going to play with Yeon. Hmph!"
With that, Yebin stomped out of the room. I watched her go, then closed the door, logged onto Concord, and started the call.
She had asked to do it right away, so I connected immediately.
"Dodo."
"Yes, Nuna."
My manager cleared her throat and suddenly turned on screen share.
"Mmm... I'll get straight to the point."
"Okay."
The moment I looked at the shared screen, my head started to spin.
Why?
Because right there in front of me was a PowerPoint slide titled:
Why Dodo and Vini Must Start a WGM Series
"Have you really never thought about doing a WGM concept with Vini?"
"...Nuna, could you date someone of the same sex?"
"If the money's right, I'd gladly act the part."
What a money-grubbing woman.
But then again, I couldn't really argue.
The metrics for the videos Yebin and I did together were just that high compared to my other content.
They weren't just high; the stream chats and video comments were constantly flooded with questions like, "So when is the WGM starting?" or "Are they actually dating in real life?"
To outsiders, it looked like we had amazing chemistry.
"Anyway, take a look at this presentation, will you?"
"...Sure, go ahead."
As soon as I gave the green light, she began flipping through the slides, showing me the data.
"Alright, look here. This is the average view count of your regular videos compared to your collabs with Vini."
"Yeah."
"You see the difference? It's almost a three-fold increase. At peak times, it's up to five times higher."
"...That is pretty crazy."
Seeing the actual numbers laid out like this made the reality sink in even more.
"It's the same story on Vini's end. In fact, her views are even higher than yours."
"How is that possible? Isn't she supposed to be playing the cute female streamer concept?"
"Wow, you really call it a 'concept' even here."
"If I ever acknowledge her as a woman, I'll buy both you and Hyeon-su the latest smartphone."
"I'm holding you to that."
After that brief banter, she went back to her pitch.
"On top of that, the drop-off rate is incredibly low. While your other videos have a normal drop-off, look at this. The mid-video drop-off rate here is cut by more than half. That means the vast majority of viewers are watching all the way to the end."
Honestly, looking at these metrics, it would be stupid for Yebin and me not to do a WGM series.
"And above all, did you know your subscriber count, which had hit a plateau, started growing rapidly after you posted those collab videos?"
"Yeah, I noticed that much."
"Plus, there's a huge WGM boom on Peonchi right now."
"I know that too."
Yes, I knew all of it. Every single bit.
"Alright, that's my case for why you two should do this. What do you think?"
"Me?"
"Yes, you."
What did I think?
There was only one thought in my mind.
"I don't want to abandon my human dignity."
I really, really wanted to keep my dignity intact.
Hearing my response, my manager let out a deep sigh.
"Listen, Do Gyeong."
When she called me Do Gyeong instead of Dodo, it meant she was giving me advice as an older sister, or at least as a fellow human being.
"Yes, Nuna."
"...No matter how much you hate the idea, the numbers are just too good. It's at the point where it would be foolish not to do it."
"Yeah..."
"Can't you think about it positively? And, I mean, I know what Vini looks like in real life. I saw her when she visited the office. She's easily in the top 1% in terms of looks, and she has a great figure. Can't you just close your eyes and do a WGM for just a year or two?"
"..."
I pondered her words for a moment, then made a major counteroffer.
"Take back the part about her being in the top 1% and having a great figure, and I'll do it right now."
"Really...?"
"Yes. I can see her right now anyway, so I'll try to convince her."
"If you're going to convince her, that's even better! Oh, do you want the PPT?"
She sounded genuinely thrilled, even offering to send over this high-quality presentation.
"...Sure, send it over."
After hanging up and receiving the file, I went over to Yeon's room and kidnapped Yebin, who was hanging out there.
To be precise, they weren't really playing; it looked more like Yeon was tutoring Yebin.
After dragging Yebin back to my room, I stared at my phone, trying to gauge the right moment to bring it up.
Yebin was kicking her feet on my bed, humming some tune.
"What are you looking at so intently?"
"Wanna see?"
She sent me a video of a cute puppy. I watched it and made a casual comment.
"Cute dog."
"Right? Cute just like me, isn't it?"
"Cut the crap unless you want to die."
I shot her a look after saying that.
A face that made me want to gag just looking at it, yet a face that was all too familiar.
Do a WGM with Lee Yebin? Seriously?
We literally bathed together before we even started elementary school. I practically know where every single mole on her body is. And I'm supposed to pretend to date her?
...
Well, whatever. Money talks. Who cares about dignity?
I mean, there are artists out there drawing weird fetishes just to pay the bills. Who am I to be picky?
I placed my phone face down on the desk and spoke to her.
"Hey, Lee Yebin."
"What?"
"I know this is going to sound absolutely insane."
"If it's insane, then please don't spit it out."
Do you think I want to say this?
But I have to. It's for both of our channels.
"Let's do a WGM."
"You crazy bastard."
Her rejection was instantaneous, but I pushed forward, laying out the points from the presentation my manager had sent.
I explained how popular our collab videos were, the subscriber growth trends, the low drop-off rate, and the current meta of the streaming platforms...
After listening to the whole explanation, Yebin asked in a surprisingly serious tone.
"...Are you really okay with it? Doing a WGM with me."
"It's pretty gross, yeah."
"Right...?"
"But I also know this is the only way for both of our channels to grow."
"That's true..."
Yebin gave a small nod, then glared at me.
"Just so we're clear, don't you dare catch feelings for me."
"You're the one who shouldn't fall for me."
Never catch feelings.
With that conversation—completely devoid of any romance or sweetness—our agreement was sealed.
For the sake of our streams, we decided to play lovers instead of friends.
A fake couple where both we and the viewers knew exactly how awkward it really was.
Well, they probably knew. Probably.