Overthinking
Darin could only think how strange it all was.
Today was supposed to be a joyous occasion celebrating a hero's triumphant return. As the parent of such a man, she ought to have been happy. But all she faced was a nightmarish reality. Something warm and wet streamed down from the corners of her eyes. No matter how hard she blinked, trying to deny it, the fact remained that she had pinned a brooch on her own son.
So the Viscountess simply squeezed her eyes shut, clinging to silence and praying for time to pass quickly.
Aftermath be damned — all she wanted was to go home and sleep. Ah, but getting there would take half a day, so she'd have to close her eyes in the carriage. But she'd be sharing that carriage with her son. As much as she loved him, his repeated outbursts made sharing a space with him feel... reluctant.
Ah, thank goodness. Thank goodness, Kael.
Still, she was his mother, after all. She had clearly registered the Emperor's promise to grant her son a suitable fief and elevate House Bayorn to a countship. One way or another, her child had received a great reward, and joy had welled up in her for that. Everything after, though, had been nothing but a flood of negative emotions.
The victory parade concluded with the Emperor's speech. Afterward, the crowd began to bustle in preparation for the banquet's after-party. Amid all this, Kael — the man of the hour — was surrounded by various nobles, exchanging pleasantries. Though a provincial noble, a countship was already promised to him, and he was one of the key figures set to lead the new generation. The flood of attention was only natural.
Darin sat in her chair, staring blankly at her son, then pushed the chair back and slowly rose. For some reason, she wanted to be alone.
But Kael's blue eyes were wide open, refusing to let his prey slip away. Even while conversing with the nobles, he never took his gaze off his mother.
Darin tried to slip away to a corner of the hall to collect herself for a moment, but she couldn't escape her son's rough grip as he pushed through the crowd.
"Ah—! Ka-Kael! Just a moment!"
Kael seized his mother's wrist — not hard enough to hurt, but tight enough that she couldn't pull free — and led her to a shadowy corner. He seemed to need a word with her.
"Mother, you should come with me. Where were you trying to go?"
"I-I was just... going to be alone for a bit, rest a little..."
"The victory parade is over anyway. The capital nobles will mingle at the after-party and then leave on their own."
As Kael said, the sun had long since set. The more spirited nobles would head off to wild parties, while those uninterested in such things would return to their own nests.
Then shouldn't her son — still quite young — be discussing national affairs with the rising generation? He wasn't a child. Why did he insist on spending even this moment with his mother?
"Th-then you should catch up with the other nobles. Or go drink with your party members..."
"I have no desire to spend time with those bastards who think of nothing but mating. I've already arranged to meet the capital nobles separately later, so there's no need for you to worry."
Did he think that settled any misunderstanding? Kael flashed a grin, then casually began to toy with his mother's waist as he continued.
"I intend to catch up with you, Mother."
"Huh? Uh..."
Darin's amber eyes couldn't meet her son's face, wandering pitifully instead. She was simply afraid to lock eyes with him. She didn't know how to respond to Kael, who seemed to change by the second.
"Y-you should stay here a few more days, shouldn't you? You're a man about to inherit a countship — you need to work harder on your social engagements. What fun could there be spending time with a woman nearly forty..."
Desperate to escape the crisis, Darin began rambling. Her clear intention was for her son to stay a while longer while she returned home first.
"What are you talking about? I just told you there's no need for me to stay here any longer. And..."
But no matter how she danced around it, her brilliant son was never going to miss her true intent. That meant he had no intention of letting her go.
"...I'll find my own entertainment, so come with me, Mother."
He'd find his own entertainment with a married woman who had children? What on earth did that mean? Darin's head spun. She couldn't believe her own flesh and blood was saying such things — not some stranger, but her own son.
"Kael, why... why are you like this? You seem so strange today."
"I'm not strange at all. You're the one acting oddly, Mother. Trying to suddenly disappear somewhere and abandon your own child."
"I-I was just tired. So tired I wanted to rest even a little..."
Somehow it felt like Kael was the one at fault, yet she was the one being interrogated. Then again, for a parent to silently leave their son's victory parade was indeed improper.
"...I'm sorry. Are you very upset?"
Darin's apology wasn't a lie, but a larger part of it was her desire to placate him — she was terrified of Kael contorting his face in displeasure. Even if he was her own child, a giant of a man like that scowling and nursing a grudge was enough to make anyone freeze in terror.
"I cried so much today, and I feel nauseous, and my condition is just so terrible..."
Darin hurriedly piled on excuses. She couldn't possibly say that being with him was what she found most repulsive, so she focused on her physical state.
"Ah, so that was the reason?"
What was so pleasant about his mother being tired? Kael began to smile languidly, as if he'd found a satisfactory solution, a pleased look on his face.
"Fortunately, there are several top-class Hospitales near the Imperial Palace. I'll take you to one of them."
A Hospitale was the equivalent of a hotel from Darin's previous life — and a very high-end one at that. A single night's stay cost half a commoner's yearly wages. A space of pure luxury.
Ordinarily, Darin would have leapt to her feet applauding, desperate to go...
Alone with Kael at a lodging house...? And of all days, today?
She didn't know the exact reason, but nausea surged up from within. Visiting a lodging house with family was surely a common enough occurrence, yet today the revulsion was maddening. If she ended up alone with her son in a private room with no servants present, she had no idea what kind of incident might occur.
No, that's not right. What am I even thinking...
Darin pressed hard at the corners of both eyes and shook her head. There had been many unsettling points so far, but she wondered if this was just excessive self-consciousness.
One of the Empire's most eligible bachelors — what could he possibly lack that he'd look at his own mother as a woman? Even here in the central capital, young ladies casting longing gazes at him were everywhere.
For now, being alone with Kael in the carriage right away feels uncomfortable. And I do want to rest...
She felt she wouldn't be able to think straight until she opened her eyes to the sun tomorrow, so visiting a lodging for the night was the priority. But that didn't mean she was ready to drop her guard around her son just yet.
The Viscountess turned the problem over in her mind, searching for an alternative, until she recalled an inn nearby where House Bayorn's coachmen and servants were waiting.
"Then how about we take separate lodgings?"
"Separate lodgings?"
"Yes. Your mother will stay at the same place as the servants."
"...That place is far too shabby for you to sleep in, Mother."
"It's fine. It's still an inn in the capital, so the facilities should be quite decent."
"..."
Kael looked displeased at his mother's words. Then he fell silent for a rather long time.
Soon after, he even stared into his mother's eyes with a chilling blue gaze, but Darin, though trembling with fear, refused to accept Kael's proposal. Even as she told herself it was absurd, she felt that if she carelessly accepted her son's invitation, something terrible would happen.
And of course, it was Darin who broke first under the silence.
"...Why... why are you looking at me like that, Kael? Is there something on your mother's face?"
"No, there isn't..."
Kael carefully observed his frightened mother's demeanor, then slowly began to relax his expression. He sensed that now was not the time.
"I'm a bit disappointed, but I have no intention of forcing my opinion on you, Mother. Very well, then. We'll do it your way."
"...Thank you."
Darin clutched her pounding chest and slowly exhaled. Relief washed over her — for now, it seemed she had averted the crisis.
"In that case, I'll stay at the servants' lodging as well."
"...That—! Ah, no, do as you like."
Darin almost refused even this, but realizing she couldn't push any further, she immediately withdrew the objection. She would have to compromise with her son to some degree if she wanted to avoid earning his resentment.
And even if she and Kael visited the same inn, it shouldn't be a major problem. House Bayorn's servants would be there, and Darin planned to share a room with the maids rather than take a private one.
It's definitely just overthinking. But just in case...
She and her son were fifteen years apart, bound by blood. No matter how unsettling his behavior, objectively speaking, she was the one making a fuss over nothing.
Right. My son would never do such a thing unless he'd gone mad. He's such a brilliant boy...
Even assuming he'd discovered women during the campaign — whether pure virgins with no experience or seductive vixens who bewitched men — Kael had an abundance of options to choose from.
And in that situation, he'd deliberately take on the risk of trying to violate his own mother?
It made no sense by any common standard.
"Mother."
A hand the size of a human face settled on the shoulder of the woman who had been standing blankly, trying to dismiss her impure thoughts. Darin's body went rigid at the sound of her son's voice from behind her.
"It would be a shame to head straight in. How about stopping by a café for a moment? If you have some rosemary tea — excellent for recovering from fatigue — you'll wake up refreshed tomorrow."
The large hand resting on her stone-stiff shoulder was the gentle touch Darin knew. Her son's warmth, full of affection and care, began to slowly put his mother at ease.
Was I really just misunderstanding everything?
Her son's touch was as warm and reassuring as always. And just in case, she'd already arranged to stay where the servants were. There was nothing left to worry about.
I'll go to the café and ask Kael. A smart boy like him wouldn't do something like this for no reason.
And so Darin decided she had indeed been misunderstanding, and accepted her son's proposal.
"Alright. Let's do that."