Chapter 403: Gold and Silver (8)
Chapter 403: Gold and Silver (8)
It was the day before I entered the Academy.
The joy of passing that difficult entrance exam lasted only a fleeting moment. When I realized I actually had to leave home and live in a foreign place, my mind became so restless that I couldn't sleep a wink all night.
It was a messy cocktail of anticipation and anxiety.
The Academy was, in name and deed, the finest educational institution on the continent. It was certain to be crawling with commoners and lower-ranking nobles like myself. There would even be people of such noble birth that I would find it difficult to even look them in the eye.
I had to survive among them for four years.
It would be a lie to say I felt no pressure.
However, my younger sister seemed to have a different set of concerns.
"Listen carefully, Brother... every woman in the world is a fox."
I wondered what she was doing visiting me so late at night, but it turned out to be nothing but useless chatter. I yawned, making it blatantly obvious that I wasn't interested.
Despite that, Ria insisted once more.
"I-I’m serious! You can't let your eyes wander, and even if a woman approaches you, you have to push her away yourself. There will definitely be people who approach you aiming for your status and wealth!"
"What status and wealth would anyone want from the second son of a rural viscount...?"
"No, no. That’s just because you don't know the world of women... And there might even be women who approach you just for a temporary thrill! Expecting you to worship them!"
It wasn't particularly inspiring advice.
When my expression turned skeptical, Ria pounded her chest in frustration. I wondered if she was starting to resemble Celine. They had been interacting for several years now, so it seemed plausible.
"Anyway, keep it in mind. Every woman is a fox, a creature to be wary of!"
"Then how am I supposed to date?"
"Don't!"
Ria cried out, bristling like a cat whose tail had been stepped on.
"You already promised to live with me later anyway! Why do you even need a girlfriend!"
"Sure, sure. I get it."
At the time, I simply let Ria's warnings go in one ear and out the other. It was right before she had to send her beloved brother away. It wasn't strange for a younger sister to throw a cute tantrum. And as if to prove her wrong, I hadn't had a single headache regarding romantic relationships for the next few years.
But today, for some reason, I felt the memories of that day coming back vividly.
Right here, in front of my sleeping junior.
Seria, who had lost consciousness, let out only faint moans. The tiny beads of moisture clinging to her eyelashes were particularly heart-wrenching.
Clutched in the girl's arms was a doll made in my likeness.
Naturally, it wasn't something I had given her. Seria had simply pulled it into her embrace out of habit the moment I laid her on the bed.
I let out a long sigh at the sight.
No matter how dense I was, even I could tell. The fact was that the feelings Seria harbored for me were extraordinary.
Even in a world where men and women were treated equally, women were still the ones pressured more regarding the concept of chastity. There was no need to weigh a man's virginity against a woman's purity on a scale.
The woman always stood to lose more.
Furthermore, if that woman was a high-ranking noble, the possibility of an equivalent exchange was even rarer.
And all these facts pointed to one thing.
Even if she had lost her reason, no woman would demand to sleep with someone she had no feelings for.
The same would be true for Seria.
I remained silent at that troubling conclusion.
"Ian..."
Unaware of my troubled heart, Seria simply whimpered. To think she would mutter my name even in her unconscious state.
Seria's affection seemed deeper than I had imagined.
That only made my mind more complicated.
I already had potential romantic partners. And not just one, but several.
For instance, there was Senior Elsie, who was the first to confess to me. There was the Saintess, who had touched various parts of my body that should have remained pure. And I couldn't leave out Senior Delphine, with whom I had already spent a first night.
And yet, it was at this exact moment that I had learned of Seria's feelings.
For me, it was not only sudden but a situation that made me let out deep, heavy sighs.
My hand brushed back the hair of the soundly sleeping Seria. She was now groaning and breaking out in a cold sweat. It seemed she was having a nightmare.
"Seria..."
Logically, I knew I had to refuse her.
However, the obsession Seria had shown before she fainted kept weighing on my mind. It was a sight that anyone would deem abnormal.
Whether it was trying to bite her own thumb out of the shock of losing me, calling the sister she respected a "bitch," or finally losing her reason and trying to pounce on me.
Of course, it wasn't as if I had only interacted with women while perfectly sober. With the Saintess and Senior Delphine, there were aspects where we had moved quite boldly with the help of alcohol.
But Seria had lost her reason far beyond that. It was at a level that couldn't be explained by mere intoxication.
That was why I had knocked her out.
It was partly because I was startled by the sudden turn of events, but fundamentally, it was to calm her down. One couldn't exactly go through with the act with a woman who wasn't in her right mind, could they?
It was while my sighs were deepening like that.
I felt the presence of someone cracking the door open and peeking in, and soon, a girl came scurrying over to stand beside me. Her wide-open eyes reflected her shock.
Cien, the 5th Princess of the Empire.
She was the one who had testified to me that Seria had become strange. It seemed she had come to the bedroom out of curiosity about what happened next.
"My goodness, Sir Ian... W-what happened? Why is Senior Yurdina...?"
"There are circumstances."
I was already troubled enough. My voice as I answered the Princess sounded almost pained. It was a silent signal asking her not to ask any more.
But the Princess wasn't the type to immediately pick up on hidden meanings.
"Senior Yurdina must have suffered so much. She’s grown thin in the meantime... She doesn't even have the strength to wake up. How pitiful."
I remained silent despite the Princess's continued sympathy.
What could I possibly say?
I didn't even know what to do right now. I simply looked down at Seria's face in silence.
Just then, another poignant voice escaped the girl's lips.
"Ian sunbae... hic, p-please don't abandon me..."
The Princess's gaze sank even further. A gloomy mental image was surfacing in those light gray eyes. In a much darker tone, the Princess muttered.
"So, it was as I thought."
"...Did you know?"
I looked at the Princess and asked, surprised.
In fact, I felt a bit of self-loathing. If even the Princess had noticed, it meant that most people, excluding myself, knew about Seria's feelings. And it also meant that I was denser than the Princess when it came to relationships.
Neither was welcome news.
But as always, the truth had a cold side to it.
"Well, I had to know. No matter how much of a senior she is, following someone around like that all day is impossible without personal feelings. Especially between a man and a woman."
With that, the Princess began to steal glances at me. When I sent her a questioning look, she cleared her throat.
A cute ahem, ahem sound.
Then, she followed up with words of emphasis.
"Do you understand? No matter how much of a senior she is, following someone around like that is impossible without personal feelings!"
"Ah, yes. Well... I see."
I nodded for now, expressing a dazed agreement. I didn't know much, but it seemed true that the Princess was more knowledgeable about romantic relationships than I was. So, she was probably right.
However, the Princess continued to look at me with a dissatisfied expression. It was a reaction I couldn't understand, but she soon turned her gaze back to Seria, changing the atmosphere.
Sympathy began to cloud the girl's complexion again.
"When I ran into Senior Yurdina, I felt a color of emotion I had never seen before. It was a wave of emotion so dark and sticky that it felt like it would swallow me whole at any moment. I ran to Sir Ian because I was scared, but now I see other emotions too."
The Princess didn't bother telling me what those emotions were. I had already guessed them myself.
It was around then that the grating comments began.
"Did you give Senior Yurdina an answer?"
"No, before I had the chance..."
"Ah, she must have fainted because she couldn't overcome her emotions."
The Princess was now even dabbing at her eyes. She seemed deeply immersed in Seria's plight.
"Even for you, Sir Ian, you probably couldn't bring yourself to speak in the face of such a desperate confession. And while you were hesitating, Senior Yurdina fainted, right?"
My mouth clamped shut.
Well, I indeed couldn't bring myself to speak. But since the actual reason Seria fainted was something else entirely, I couldn't say a word.
"Indeed, how could anyone be so cold to such a fragile woman... Far from shaking off her hand, you probably couldn't even say anything harsh."
Ahem, I cleared my throat, showing my discomfort. It was a sign to stop talking about it.
Of course, as always, the Princess was dense. There was no way she would understand my implicit expression of intent.
And so, the condemnation toward me continued.
"Could there really be a man who would lay a hand on a woman confessing her love? If such a person existed, they would be trash. A bad man!"
"Still, I'm glad the person Senior Yurdina likes is Sir Ian. At least Sir Ian wouldn't do anything that goes against chivalry, right?"
"How did you comfort Senior Yurdina, Sir Ian? Perhaps you held her in your arms and whispered warm words to her...?"
Every single word was a critical hit.
I trembled, then finally unable to endure it, I shouted.
"Enough!"
Startled by the sudden shout, the Princess stared at me blankly. She looked like she didn't have the slightest clue why I was acting this way.
I was already feeling guilty, and it felt like daggers were being driven into my chest. It would have been strange if I wasn't annoyed.
But it was also ridiculous to scold the Princess. She hadn't said anything wrong. Rather, I was the one in the wrong.
Above all, she was the Emperor's own daughter. She wasn't in a position to be scolded just for being dense.
So, in the end, after hesitating for a long time, I let out a sigh of resignation and spoke.
Instead, I decided to discuss something more constructive with the Princess.
"Let's talk business for a moment."
The disposition that would decide the fate of the Yurdina family. There was only one person suitable to represent me before the Emperor.
And only after this problem was resolved could we discuss Seria's feelings.
That day, I had to put our heads together with the Princess until Seria woke up.