Beneath the Cold Black Sun
I couldn’t say a word. She was right. No matter how many pretty words I dressed it up with, my sins wouldn’t vanish, and the resentment of those I’d wronged wouldn’t fade. I knew how it would end, which was why all my talk of duty and obligation was nothing but deception and excuses.
In the end, only the truth remained. The truth that I had sinned.
“…There’s no helping it. It’s a fate I have to bear.”
She didn’t say anything more. She simply looked at me with sorrowful eyes.
“……”
Even that gaze was another piece of evidence of my guilt. For someone worthless like me, even kindness was a sin. That goodwill, that concern—none of it could ever truly belong to me.
“Then I should get some sleep.”
I tried to leave because staying there any longer was unbearable. Of course, I had never intended to sleep near her in the first place. A transparent barrier stood between us, and even setting aside matters of propriety between men and women, I couldn’t let her see my sleeping face.
Perhaps this single room could shatter her misunderstanding, but even so, I couldn’t bring myself to do it—not if it meant sacrificing what little pride I had left.
But then—
“…You’re going to sleep already?”
Her slightly odd tone stopped me in my tracks.
“Yes. It’s late, and tomorrow I have to leave early……”
“Did you know this is the first time you’ve slept here in the past few years?”
Of course I knew. Thanks to Rowell and Aegina, who always looked after me from next door, staying out overnight had been impossible. Even without that, there had never been any reason for me to sleep here.
“But you’re really just going to sleep?”
Depending on how you heard it, those words could have been seductive, stirring. Instead, they put my heart strangely at ease.
“Haha. Please don’t tease me too much.”
Her voice and expression had already returned to their usual playful state. Seeing that familiar tone and face, the guilt that had been tightening around my chest disappeared like a lie.
“Why? Am I not pretty enough for you?”
“Of course not. You’re so beautiful that anyone who approaches you would burn to death.”
Yes. This much was enough for me. Simple banter and light camaraderie. That was the only happiness I was allowed.
“Anyway, it’s your first time staying here for so long. Are you really going to leave like you were never here?”
“But I really should get some sleep……”
“You can sleep here. Just keep me company until I fall asleep.”
She pointed at the floor in front of her with her finger.
“But……”
As I’d thought, I had no intention of letting her see my sleeping face. That defenseless state, where only my most primal self was exposed—it wasn’t something I could show to anyone. At least not someone as fundamentally ugly as me.
Of course, plenty of people had already seen my sleeping face. Not just Rowell and my traveling companions, but even those I’d shared the academy with.
And I had always hated it. What if I muttered something in my sleep? What if even a fragment of those ugly, selfish emotions slipped out?
I don’t want to be seen. I don’t want to be seen. I don’t want to be seen.
“…But you don’t sleep, Lady Rofena. If I keep you company until you fall asleep, I won’t get a wink of rest myself.”
I thought I’d said it naturally enough. Even Rowell wouldn’t have noticed anything strange. But—
“Liar.”
Her eyes held a faint sadness and disappointment.
“That’s not the real reason.”
Faced with that gaze, I couldn’t say anything. I could have forced out my usual timid, servile smile or continued with clever banter if I’d wanted to, but I simply couldn’t.
“…Fine. I just didn’t want to see that sad look on your face anymore, but I guess I overstepped. My mistake. Good night.”
With those words, she turned away. I turned as well, silently. But no matter how much I tried to leave, my feet wouldn’t move.
She didn’t like me. That was nothing more than an illusion created by our circumstances.
No—perhaps the very idea that she felt anything for me was my own delusion. Maybe my envy and longing for Rowell and Aegina were projecting that image onto the two of us.
But even so, there was one undeniable truth: at this moment, she understood me better than my oldest friend, Rowell.
“Then please wake me a little earlier tomorrow.”
‘And to someone like her, hiding my sleeping face means nothing at all.’
I laid out my bedding right where she had pointed and lay down. At the same time, I saw her turn to look at me. Surprise, followed by a gentle, beautiful smile.
“Okay. Leave it to me!”
Faced with that smile, I had no choice but to bury my face in the pillow to hide the foolish emotion rising in my chest.
* * *
“Alright, let’s go.”
I dismantled the barrier I’d set up and untied the ropes one by one. She had woken me early, just as I’d asked.
“…Haaam.”
Far earlier than necessary.
She must have been happier than she should have been that I’d listened to her last night. The moment the sun rose—proving her claim about losing her sense of time had been a lie—she woke me. Then, as if she’d been holding it in all night, she showered me with playful, witty remarks and gentle encouragement. I couldn’t bring myself to cut her off.
“…She must have been that bored being alone.”
A space so small that stretching both arms would reach the walls. She endured every moment in there without even being able to sleep. Her only conversation partner was me, for just a couple of hours a day.
“Someday… maybe there’ll be another way.”
When I died and the secret of this space was buried forever, she would be trapped here for eternity as well. Yes, a few decades—maybe even less than a century—might be bearable. For a demon like her, a few decades would feel short. But the eternity that followed would be different. I couldn’t bring myself to do that to her.
After linking the horses together with a spell, I climbed onto one. Even connected, they couldn’t run at full speed. Their pace would be slower, but the distance wasn’t that great, and from the midpoint onward there would be proper roads. We should arrive before nightfall—as long as my feet didn’t unconsciously slow down.
After all, no matter what anyone said, I was walking straight toward one of my nightmares.
“Come to think of it, it’s ridiculous. Walking toward a nightmare just to step into a trap.”
It was something I would never have done before. It seemed the war had changed me, too.
“And alone, at that.”
Rowell and I had faced far worse than traps or nightmares—we’d stood before the Demon King and even the Demon God. But the fact that I was willingly doing this much by myself was surprising.
“…I just don’t know if it’s a good change. For all I know, it’s not responsibility or courage, but just arrogance.”
Skipping both breakfast and lunch, I kept the horses moving. Despite having no riders, they maintained a decent pace. Thanks to the well-paved roads from the midpoint onward, we arrived at our destination while the sun was still up, just as I’d expected.
“Looks like my memory wasn’t wrong after all.”
A rocky mountain rising straight toward the sky like a tower, and atop it, a massive sphere that looked as if someone had placed it there. The vast shadow cast by that sphere.
Yenril Saruturus. People called that sphere the Cold Black Sun, and the shadow it cast Saruteges—the Mercy of the Black Sun.
This was the only place in the Huinto region, where endless wilderness stretched in every direction and the sun beat down mercilessly year-round, where one could escape the sunlight. It was also the largest marketplace in the entire region.
“It’s smaller than before the war, but still quite large.”
Within Saruteges, countless large and small tents and street stalls lined with goods already filled the space—too many to count at a glance.
Amusbian. Meaning “between two suns,” this market opened twice a year for a full month each time, operating day and night. While travelers engaged in bartering and small-scale black-market dealings, the majority of activity came from large-scale transactions between major merchant guilds.
Here, selling the horses and the knights’ equipment would be simple. Travelers and merchants who had impulsively bought more goods than expected always needed extra transport. Some might even pay a premium. If I was lucky, I could make a decent profit.
But……
“…As expected, they’re here.”
The sight of the large pink tents clustered near the center of Saruteges sent a chill down my spine. Yes—my nightmare was right there.
“I probably won’t run into them, but……”
With this many people, meeting them would be the strange thing. Still, ominous premonitions were rarely wrong.
“Alright, let’s hurry. The sooner we go, the sooner we can leave.”
I led the horses toward Saruteges, making sure to stay as far from those pink tents as possible.
“Come, come! We have Basilisk eggs! Cockatrice eggs too—take a look!”
“Scrolls for sale! Various spells available!”
The street vendors desperately tried to catch travelers’ attention, but most visitors ignored them completely. Instead, more eyes turned toward me, leading over a dozen horses laden with goods.
‘Of course. Calling ordinary Toontoon and Rodron eggs Basilisk and Cockatrice eggs…’
Some travelers might tolerate a bit of exaggeration or outright fraud as part of the market’s charm, but there was a limit. What on earth were they thinking, trying to pull off such an absurd scam?
Of course, not every stall was just hot air and fraud. There were rare goods and crafts you couldn’t find in the surrounding regions, and scattered among them were items of genuinely good quality.
Some collectors even came specifically looking for these stalls. Though how many of them actually walked away satisfied was another question.
Still, I didn’t need to wait for customers like they did. As I’d said, the true players at Amusbian were the major merchant guilds. These guilds not only traded among themselves but also bought and sold directly from individual travelers and small merchants. Horses—especially fine ones like these—were always in demand.