How to Cure Androphobia (1)
The evening of the day I taught Cha Eunju how to handle a man's cock.
In the quiet of the hospital room, having relieved my sexual frustration for the first time in a while, I was resting with a considerably more relaxed state of mind.
'All that's left now is to get discharged, and things will come together soon enough.'
We'd already gone all the way to anal, so there was no reason sex itself would be off the table. All I had to do was engineer a nice two-person date at the right moment, guide things toward a motel, and she'd fold without any real push.
That was exactly why I'd granted Cha Eunju a "wish." I'd framed it as granting her one thing she wanted, but knowing the Cha Eunju of now, it was obvious her wish would end up benefiting me in the end.
Maybe a date, maybe a meal together, maybe even a request for more 'hypnosis training.' …Who knows, she might even get a little bold and ask for something genuinely lewd.
'Either way, it works out in my favor, so I don't particularly care which it is.'
Still, I'd mapped out roughly how to react depending on what she wished for. If, say, she wasted her wish on something as trivial as treating me to a single meal, I'd pretend it didn't count and let her keep it.
Do that, and Cha Eunju would gradually, of her own accord, start wishing for things that were increasingly lewd — or at least increasingly intimate with me.
I couldn't be a hundred percent certain, but still — I believed in her.
'She's probably home by now, right?'
Judging by how hurriedly she'd left, I figured she'd gone straight home without detouring anywhere else. Maybe she was even masturbating right now while replaying everything that had happened in her head.
I hoped so, sincerely. That's how it works — consciously and subconsciously alike, she'd end up thinking about me more and more.
Of course, this was nothing more than a pleasant fantasy, and even if it didn't come true, no harm done. We'd long since passed the point where Cha Eunju's conquest could slip through my fingers over something this small.
It was about time to start working on the other heroines besides her. Excluding Choi Marie, it wouldn't be nearly as easy as it had been with Cha Eunju to manufacture opportunities to be alone with each of them — but patience had a way of delivering opportunities on its own schedule.
-Roll, roll.
"Th-the, the, the dinner…. I-I b-b-brought it…."
…Yes, like right now.
"Thanks, Isabel. You've been working hard, as always."
"N-no…. I-it's, it's only what I o-ought to do, s-sir…. Um, but where is Cha Eunju…?"
"I sent her home a little while ago. Having her sleep on a hospital cot for two days straight just felt wrong."
"Umm…!! I-I-I-is that s-so……."
The moment she heard that Cha Eunju was gone, the tension in Kim Isabel swelled visibly higher.
She was already terrified of men as it was, and now she was alone in a cramped room with one — naturally, that fear would only compound.
It made no difference that all my limbs were bound except my right arm. In Kim Isabel's eyes, I probably looked like nothing more than a monster trussed up at the wrists and ankles.
'Come to think of it, conversation was a little easier when Cha Eunju was around.'
You really only learn how much something mattered once it's gone. I reflect, with some remorse, on having briefly wondered whether her presence might interfere with my campaign to win Kim Isabel over.
It was only because she'd been there that I'd managed to talk with Kim Isabel through the day, and that she'd joined me and Han Sora for that meal earlier.
If I asked Kim Isabel to share a meal with me right now, she'd likely bolt, her face drained bone-white. Not that I'd see her expression past the veil.
"I told you before, but if it's too much for you, you don't need to feel obligated just because I'm your assigned patient. I already know you're not used to men, Isabel."
"N-n-no…. I-I'm the one who injured you, Mr. Lee Seonho, s-so it's only p-p-proper that I tend to your wounds until the very end…."
"You don't need to carry that much guilt. It wasn't really because of you that I got hurt — I was just too weak, and my body paid the price."
"……."
In answer to my words, Kim Isabel quietly turned her head away, as if averting her gaze.
What expression, I wondered, lay beyond that veil? Guilt, perhaps — the conviction that in treating me she'd somehow made me uncomfortable? Or fondness, maybe, toward a man who showed her a side unlike any of the men she'd known?
With her face unreadable, bold moves were a little harder to pull off. If I could at least catch a glimpse of her mouth, it would help.
From prior knowledge, I knew she was a beauty, but since crossing over into this world I'd yet to see Kim Isabel's bare face — aside from a brief peek at her lips when we ate together earlier.
'Coming on too strong would only backfire.'
For a man who wasn't even the protagonist, having built any connection with Kim Isabel at all was already a miracle. If I fumbled here and drove her away, it would all amount to nothing.
Above all, what mattered was steadily impressing upon her that I was a 'harmless man,' different from all the others.
…For instance, showing her the gentlemanly restraint of a man who wouldn't pounce even if, hypothetically, a woman were the one doing the seducing.
"E-enjoy your m-meal…."
"…Hey, Isabel."
"Y-yes?!"
"…Sorry. Did I startle you?"
"N-n-no…. I-it's, it's just, did you need something…?"
"Nothing much, really. I was just wondering — have you ever thought about curing your androphobia?"
"……."
The fact that she didn't reflexively refuse meant I could take it as a yes, at least for now. Her nature was to deflect any goodwill from a man first and ask questions later.
For Kim Isabel, this had to be a matter of such weight that even a proposal from the very 'man' she feared couldn't help but hold her attention.
After all, if not for that 'androphobia' of hers, the title of this generation's Saint would have belonged to Kim Isabel by default, with room to spare.
"H-h-how…sir…?"
"You experienced it once before, remember? You temporarily became comfortable around men thanks to my mental-type buff."
"Y-yes…."
"Back then there was no time, so I forced the buff onto you. But if you truly want to fix your phobia, I could use it to help you. Either use the buff to suppress your fear of men temporarily, or have you do a bit of regular training with me — and potentially ease your androphobia permanently."
"…I-is that…r-really possible…?"
"Want to try it for a moment as a test? If you're interested, just bring your head to my right hand. Then I'll cast the same buff I used inside the dungeon."
"……."
Kim Isabel stared hard at the hand I extended toward her, lost in deliberation.
Her face was hidden, but picturing what lay beyond the veil wasn't so difficult. Even without an expression to read, her body language and reactions told me plenty about what she was feeling.
If she brought her head to my hand like this, training Kim Isabel would get considerably easier….
"M-my, my, my thanks for the o-offer, but…. I-I-I-I'm sorry…."
"That's all right. If it's hard, don't force it. I don't think of it as something you have to fix, anyway."
"I-I-I-I truly don't doubt you, Mr. Lee Seonho. I-it's just that approaching a man on my own is s-s-still a little…d-difficult for me…."
"I know. I won't pressure you, so don't worry. All I'm saying is that I can help whenever you want it — not that you have to fix it because it's an inconvenience."
"……Yes."
It was disappointing, but staying composed and acting like nothing had happened was the important part.
If I showed even a hint of impatience here, Kim Isabel's guard would shoot right back up. To build trust with someone whose basic psychological resistance to men ran this deep, rushing things was absolutely off the table.
As slowly, as calmly, and as patiently as possible — the way you conquer something one measured step at a time over a long stretch of time.
At this point in time, I was already the man closest to Kim Isabel, so as long as I didn't stumble by rushing ahead for no reason, there was no chance anyone else would steal her from me.
"I'll enjoy the meal. Thanks as always, Isabel."
"Y-ye-ees…."
-Roll, roll….
Not asking her to eat with me was entirely for Kim Isabel's sake.
With everyone gathered like earlier, it might have been fine — but a meal alone with a man would surely land on her as nothing but a burden.
There was no need to rush. Even if no progress happened at the church, it hardly mattered.
Once she enrolled at the Academy, events of one kind or another would inevitably throw us together anyway.
⁎ ⁎ ⁎
Kim Isabel's treatment happened three times a day, beginning roughly thirty minutes to an hour after each meal.
Because the injuries I'd sustained in the practical exam were full-body muscle tears compounded by multiple fractures, fully healing me required channeling holy power into my body again and again, session after session.
The healing she'd done inside the dungeon had been nothing more than emergency aid — just enough to keep me alive. Pouring too much holy power into an ordinary person's body all at once would itself become poison, the priests who always accompanied Kim Isabel had explained, so multiple infusions were essential.
Well, I hardly knew enough about holy power to judge, so I simply accepted it as one of those things.
'Still, the evening treatment is running late.'
Usually, once another priest came by to clear away the meal cart, Kim Isabel would arrive shortly after to treat me. That was how it had gone at breakfast and lunch, at least, so dinner shouldn't have been much different.
But more than an hour had passed since my tray was cleared, and she still hadn't come — by the look of it, she was busy with any number of things.
…Or, well, maybe there was never supposed to be an evening treatment at all, and I was just misremembering.
'She hasn't even formally enrolled yet — surely they aren't already working her to the bone for the senior priestesses.'
She'd transferred her affiliation early for the sole purpose of being my attending healer, and she wasn't even part of the Cheonmu Academy Church yet. It was entirely possible that the upperclassmen already belonging to the Academy Church were giving her a hard time.
If something like that was happening, I made a mental note to raise hell about it later. …Purely hypothetically, of course — only if it turned out to be true.
'Staring at my smartphone all day does wear on me a little, I'll admit.'
Still, it felt like a waste to fritter the time away watching NutTube videos, so I was putting these hours to reasonably efficient use.
What I'd mainly been doing on my phone lately was browsing overseas adult goods sites, hunting for cosplay outfits and training equipment that would suit Cha Eunju. A human-grade collar with a soft material around the neck, for instance, or anal beads with an animal tail attached.
One of the best methods for training a person, after all, is to reduce them to livestock. Make them understand in their very body that a fixed hierarchy exists between their human master and themselves — and that defying the master is not to be tolerated.
Some might ask whether I wasn't getting ahead of myself preparing for such full-scale training, but honestly, I'd say it was close at hand. Once we'd consummated our relationship even once, Cha Eunju's personality meant she'd hand over everything — liver and gallbladder both — from that point on.
'Maybe I'll place the order now. It'll probably arrive at my place right around discharge.'
I was checking out the shopping cart stuffed with adult toys and cosplay outfits for Cha Eunju, quietly stiffening below the belt as I pictured her wearing them, when—
-Roll, roll.
"S-s-sorry I'm…l-l-late…."
Kim Isabel slid open the door and entered carefully, appearing long after her scheduled treatment time.
…Without any of the priests who usually accompanied her. Alone, entirely on her own.