Chapter 53: A World That Rips Off Brats
Translator: RaidenTL
Chapter 53: A World That Rips Off Brats
“Keep this a secret from your mother.”
Once the hunt was over, the butchering naturally followed. Cassia pulled a dagger out of thin air and began skillfully skinning the three-meter-long rabbit.
I sat a little distance away, watching her peel the hide as easily as if she were slicing tofu. Cassia shot me a curious glance, but I stayed still, genuinely wondering what the internal organs of a three-meter rabbit looked like.
“Tsk… this part isn’t edible. We’ll discard the meat.”
When she cut open the stomach, something resembling bone fragments tumbled out. Cassia immediately incinerated them with magic. Then, she proceeded to hack the rest of the meat into small pieces and toss them aside haphazardly.
“Is rabbit meat not edible?”
“...It is, but I don’t feel like eating it. Let’s go catch a boar instead.”
Cassia washed the blood from her hands with transparent water summoned into the air, then stroked my head.
Judging by her reaction, that rabbit had definitely eaten a human. Having lived a second life, I could tell just by the way she meticulously checked the entrails of the hunted boar afterward.
“I’ll have a coat made for you from the rabbit fur. It’ll be a nice memento of this winter.”
It looked like this crazy soldier lady was planning to hog my boar for herself. I couldn’t just ignore such tyranny. I might tolerate injustice, but I could never tolerate a personal loss.
“What about my boar?”
“The hide is useless, but… do you want it?”
Come to think of it, I had no use for the spoils of war. At best, it would be worth a bit of pocket money, and I was just a brat who had never even received an allowance.
In times like these, it was better to leave the soldier sister with the impression that I was a "good boy."
“I want to use it! I want to make gloves for the sister who let me ride the robot! And the sister who let me ride the tank! And the sister who operated the mechanized tactical infantry armored vehicle!”
“...You’re a good child.”
Cassia opened her eyes wide and stared at me. This was my chance to score points.
“I’m good? But that’s only natural.”
“Yes, you are good. Unlike those things who are selfish and think they’re entitled to everything just because they’re male. You need to keep growing up like this….”
It seemed this lady had been through a lot. To think a mere pair of boar-hide gloves could draw out her inner thoughts like this—I really wanted to see for myself what the men in this society were actually doing.
The only men I’d seen so far were the hyungs who helped me change clothes during shoots, the male kindergarten teachers, and the old man Mom hired for an exorbitant amount of money to look after Grasha.
The 1:20 gender ratio felt even more skewed than the statistics suggested.
“Yup! I’ll keep growing up like this and live happily with the sisters and Mom!”
Cassia’s silver eyes trembled.
“Does that include me?”
“Uh-huh! Soldiers are cool! You’re the best! I like you so much~!”
I lunged at the soldier sister for a hug. Perhaps because her hands were still bloody, she didn't hug me back, but it was easy to tell she desperately wanted to.
Combining superior elf looks with being male made life feel incredibly easy.
“Right, right. Let’s head back now. Your mother will scold us if we’re too late.”
With a wave of Cassia’s hand, the butchered boar carcass vanished into thin air, just like the rabbit hide. Since I had a Dragon—the progenitor of magic—right there, I made a mental note to pester her for lessons once I could handle mana.
I was trying to keep some distance from Hindel, but that damn lizard had too much to give me. This childhood emotional labor was as exhausting and painful as professional social life; I almost felt like reporting it to the Labor Bureau.
Carried on the soldier sister’s back, I returned to the cabin and headed to the bedroom. After facing the cold wind and battling a three-meter rabbit, drowsiness began to creep in.
“Mmm… the smell of blood?”
Mom began to react sensitively. I crawled into Hindel’s arms and pretended to be asleep.
“...Yong-hwan, wake up. Yong-hwan.”
“Noo… wanna sleep….”
Common sense dictated that I should wake up when my big-titted elf mama called, but my "secret friend" play with Cassia had to remain a secret.
“Yong-hwan, did you go outside? Hmm?”
“I hate you, Mommy….”
I rubbed my face deeper into Hindel’s chest, effectively sinking the mother who suffered from a terminal case of "I love my son so much I could die."
She looked like she wanted to say something, but what could she do besides hover around hesitantly! What could she do if I kept my mouth shut about playing secret friends with her own friend!
“...It seems he went hunting outside. Let him sleep. I’ll take it up with the Countess tomorrow. Yong-hwan is sleeping, isn't he?”
“You took a boy hunting? Are you insane? I’m going to—”
“Shh, he’s sleeping.”
I wasn't actually asleep yet, just drifting in and out of consciousness, but Hindel held Mom back. I heard a few more mumbles after that, but I ignored them and closed my eyes.
***
The three-meter rabbit hide returned as a coat.
“Is this it?”
“Does my son not like his new coat?”
Mom started snapping photos like crazy as I stood there wearing the snow-white rabbit fur jumper.
“But it was a hu~ge Mr. Rabbit! Three meters long! It was super big! Where’s the rest of it?”
“The one you caught while hunting? Let’s see… it looks like Cassia used a bit more of the fur. The hat seems to be made of polar bear material, though.”
Mom analyzed my jumper dispassionately. No, wait. I caught a three-meter-long rabbit, and it wasn't enough to make more than this one thick, triple-layered child’s jumper? This was a scam.
That soldier auntie definitely embezzled my hide, just like she probably embezzled her subordinates' pay.
“No! it was three meters! You could make a jumper and still have leftovers!”
“There are parts that can’t be used. Look, there are gloves and earmuffs too~!”
Mom tried her best to soothe me. It really felt like these ladies were trying to rip off a child’s hunting spoils.
I protested to Mom while wearing the gloves, which still had the sharp claws attached.
“Kyaaaah~! So cute! So cute! My son is the best~!”
“Cassia Noona stole my hide! Tell her to give it back!”
“Yes, yes, Mommy will definitely have a word with her. Okay? Now, give me a ‘Rawr~!’ pose!”
Mom was useless.
Still, Cassia had lent me a gun, let me use her ammo, and protected me, so I figured I’d just consider it payment for services rendered. Cursing this petty society that even shakes down children, I spent about two hours listening to the transformation sound of the Green Brachiosaurus Beta XII S on repeat.
I started feeling a bit better. Mom, looking delighted for some reason, kept taking pictures of me with my toys to brag to her acquaintances.
“Give me this!”
The problem was the youngest sister eyeing my clothes.
“No, it’s mine.”
“GIVE IT TO ME!!!!”
Grasha raised her voice. I wondered who would ever take this girl as a wife. No, her personality was so fierce I wondered who she would even try to take.
Usually, as the older brother, I’d yield to the youngest, but I couldn't help it this time. I pulled Grasha into a hug.
“Instead, stay like this with Oppa, okay?”
“Uuu….”
The youngest tried to say something but then stayed still. It was hot wearing a thick fur coat in a well-heated house, but I couldn't move until she was satisfied.
If I wasn't careful, she’d snatch this away too!
Being a child after all, she fell asleep after playing with the Green Brachiosaurus Beta XII S—which I’d tossed aside after getting bored—for about thirty minutes.
“Mmm…?”
I must have fallen asleep at some point too. Grasha and I were lying side by side, covered by my fur coat. I spotted the purple-headed Snow Woman sister pointing a camera at us.
Candid sleeping photos—the absolute worst. Even if I reported this to the police, she’d probably be found innocent.
“Who are you…?”
Morian’s eyes grew as wide as saucers.
“Huh…? It’s me, Morian Noona. Yong-hwan?”
Seeing her look at me with a face full of betrayal was almost cute. I’d acted on impulse, and now it was hard to fix. For now, I pretended to rub my eyes and look around.
I just woke up. I just woke up. I simulated the situation in my head several times and managed a god-tier performance of someone who was truly disoriented.
“Mmm…. Morian Noona, you’re here?”
“Yes, yes, it’s me. Me. You startled me….”
When I got up and approached her slowly, Morian scooped me up into her arms. Fortunately, the acting seemed to work.
“Where’s Mom…?”
“She went to the market to get stuff for dinner. You’re happy to see Noona after so long, right? You’re having fun, right? Hmm?”
She was such a chore. Since Hindel had already given me the Green Brachiosaurus Beta XII S, and I’d given the one Morian gave me to Grasha, I felt no obligation toward the Snow Woman sister.
“Mmm, seeing Noona makes my heart go pit-a-pat~.”
I talked nonsense while idly kneading Morian’s chest. That alone was enough to make the Snow Woman sister—who served as the CEO of a subsidiary—look like she was dying of happiness as she ruthlessly rubbed her face against mine.
“Ugh, it hurts…. Stop it….”
“I guess you’re not fully awake yet? What should we play? Hmm? Hmm?”
Giving me the chance to play but asking for my choice was incredibly dull.
In times like this, it was time for the game I’d always wanted to play—the one Grasha always selfishly took the lead in—but since I was maintaining the persona of a precious child, I couldn't bring myself to do it.
“Let’s play house~! I’ll be the Papa, and Morian Noona can be the Mama!”
I’d had some trouble with "Papakatsu" lately, so it was time to sell my charm as a supportive, devoted husband.
“Oh~! I like that. So, what should we do?”
“Morian Noona—no, my wife Morian—just got back from work! And I’m greeting her!”
The Snow Woman sister flinched at the word "wife." It was obvious she was thrilled to bits. What a pathetic old maid of this reversed world.
“Welcome home~! Honey, you worked hard. Would you like dinner first? A bath? Or….”
“Wa-wa-wa-wa-wa-wa…!”
Morian started making strange noises as if she were flustered.
She probably expected a line like, “Or… me?”
“Would you like to see our cute Grasha?”
“Huh? Oh? Ah, ahem, shall we see Grasha first?”
With a face flushed bright red and her mind clearly in the gutter, I led Morian along and enjoyed playing house until Mom returned.