Chapter 201: It Started Creeping Closer.
Translator: RaidenTL
Chapter 201: It Started Creeping Closer.
Since the Murim Alliance Leader was footing the bill anyway, I left the cleanup to Amber, and we headed back to our lodging. Jin Ryu-hwa held me in a tight embrace, showing no intention of letting go, prompting Marika to let out a long sigh as she followed behind.
"We're going to your place, so why are you behind me?"
"I'm keeping watch in case you try to run. Turn left there."
The rejuvenated old hag had me in a princess carry and was sneakily feeling up my butt. Since this kind of sexual harassment was a daily occurrence, I didn't feel much of anything and just decided to squeeze her breasts first.
Squish.
The ligaments were intact, and the shape and form were excellent. There was a reason why female martial arts masters were so popular in smutty novels.
"By the way, you said this was a staff dinner. Did the Alliance Leader really attend wearing such slutty clothes?"
"It’s a welcome dinner for the newbies, a welcome dinner! I thought if I dressed like this, maybe some guys would hit on me..."
"How pathetic," Marika remarked coldly.
It was a desperate struggle by the Murim Alliance Leader to use up her remaining eggs before they expired, but Marika’s evaluation was ruthless. Jin Ryu-hwa’s turquoise eyes glared at Marika with terrifying intensity.
"So, did no one actually hit on you?"
"Only the ones who aren't my type show interest. Above all else, they have to be handsome! I was having a good time, but then all the young ones vanished, and before I knew it, they’d all been replaced by old farts!"
I could see why this old hag with very specific tastes was wandering around looking for men. It wasn't like there was a shortage of men here like in my neighborhood, but her self-awareness was so bottom-tier that she probably couldn't even find a marriage partner.
"Just how handsome do they have to be?"
"Hmm... about as much as Yong-hwan?"
"Do you actually have any intention of getting married, Sword Saint?" Marika asked, looking exasperated.
"No, my standards used to be lower. But after seeing a face like this, everyone else looks like a bottom-feeder! A bottom-feeder! Am I asking for much? I just want to snatch up a young, talented, handsome kid and raise him well to eat him up."
"We call that 'having no intention of getting married,'" the cold mafia woman retorted.
At the words of the ruthless mafia boss, the Sword Saint let out a childish "Hmph!" despite her age.
"Still, aren't I a huge beauty? I've got big breasts, wide hips, and I'm a master of the Life and Death Realm. I'm tired of worrying about what others think; I want to feel some happiness too. While raising a cute husband!"
"Is this person really someone worth respecting?" I asked.
"She has the flaw of turning into a brat when she drinks. She'll probably come to apologize first thing tomorrow, so I can't even stay mad," Marika replied.
It seemed Marika and the Murim Alliance Leader were quite close.
"Are you two well-acquainted?"
"We met occasionally because of the Chairwoman."
"Our Hahou Ju! She was so cute when she was all nervous the first time I saw her!"
The Murim Alliance Leader tried to sling an arm around Marika’s shoulder. Marika leaned away to avoid it, but she was caught and pulled into the embrace anyway.
"To the public, she is a pure and elegant female master."
"This person?" I asked back, looking at the perverted Sword Saint who was still kneading my butt.
"Hahaha! I'm a great actress in front of people, you know? But since our brat here doesn't even know who I am, I feel like I can just be myself without any pretenses. I love it!"
"...Can I return this person?"
"No way, no way. Only a tiny fraction of people in the Alliance know I'm like this. A tiny fraction."
She sounded like the quintessential garbage-tier boss who makes their subordinates' blood run cold.
"Still, you seem too much like a third-rate thug. Rather than the head of an organization, you're like a teenage girl in heat."
"...I think the 'in heat' part is accurate," Marika muttered.
"Hey! You try living another thirty years! No one treats me like a woman because I'm the Murim Alliance Leader! If I try to get close to cute boys, they call me pathetic! I'm a woman too! A woman!"
It seemed she’d been triggered quite a bit by being called an old maid.
"Our Ryu-hwa must have had it so hard~ Even though she's this pretty and cool, the men just don't recognize it~"
"Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! It's okay, it's okay. I don't care about those bottom-feeders anymore!"
I started to get the feeling that if I pampered her just a little, I could wrap her around my finger. My power-sensing radar began to lock onto this simp, face-obsessed, old maid martial arts master.
The conversation continued as we entered the lodging.
"Weren't there many who courted you? I heard you rejected them all."
"Because they were all ugly!!!" the Alliance Leader shouted at Marika, as if she had a lot of pent-up grievances. "No matter how much people say they look 'manly' or whatever, they're just plain ugly!"
Looking at her with pity, Marika pulled some snacks and a few bottles of liquor out of her subspace—or rather, her 'diplomatic pouch,' to use the term from the home country.
"...I heard there were some who were quite handsome."
"I want to meet a guy with a face like a girl!"
As someone who fell into the 'pretty boy' category, the comment about a 'face like a girl' felt a bit like a personal attack.
"Look, look at Yong-hwan. He's so handsome and pretty. I've never even seen a woman who looks this good! If he were a girl, I would've asked him out! We could've just adopted a kid!"
The Murim Alliance Leader grabbed me by the armpits and started swinging me side to side to show me off to Marika. It was a ridiculous display, but sadly, I lacked the strength to resist.
Marika placed two identical square bottles in front of herself and Jin Ryu-hwa. The two of them clinked the bottles and drained them in one go, as if they were used to this.
"I'm gonna get married. I'm really gonna get married. Give me your blessing!"
"I cannot give you an answer even if you ask me."
Marika pulled out another bottle. It was a liquor I recognized. I remembered it clearly because it cost about as much as my mom's monthly salary.
Marika looked at me.
"I do agree his beauty is nonsensical, considering he takes after the Senior Superintendent General..."
"Senior Superintendent General? Who's that? There's someone else who looks like this?!"
I knew our home-grown sow was popular with women, but it seemed even Marika liked my mom's face.
"My mom."
"Oh...!"
I didn't know why she was impressed, but I started getting worried that another person was aiming for my dad's spot.
"So, for Ryu-hwa, looks are the top priority, right?"
"Yeah, yeah. I've seen plenty of guys who were called 'refined,' but they didn't have beauty. They were just 'handsome' and that was it."
I understood well enough that she had an incredibly high standard for appearance. I looked at Marika. Seeing her sigh and shake her head, it didn't seem like the right time.
"Let's start with the eyes—black. I've never seen black eyes so clear and transparent. I thought they were jewels. And look at this fair skin. It doesn't even look sickly; it's just... don't you want to lick it?"
"I do have those thoughts occasionally."
I thought this was the eighth round of drinks meant to soothe the Alliance Leader and send her on her way, but once we arrived, it turned into a session for sexually harassing me.
"And when I look with my... well, with my Mana Eyes, as you guys call them... his Yang energy is enormous. When he grows up, he's definitely going to be an incredible male!"
"He's already impressive now."
"How do the Hahou sisters know that...?"
The Alliance Leader, who was sitting me on her lap while chugging liquor, widened her eyes.
"Is it roughly this big?"
Marika held up her hands to show an approximate size. The Alliance Leader stared intently. But this was a total understatement.
"It's way bigger than that when it's throbbing!"
I was annoyed that she was trying to measure my member based on when it was flaccid—specifically, when my body was being squeezed and my joints forcibly stretched during 'training.'
Marika spread her hands much wider.
"1 Chi...?"
As expected of an inferior colonial planet... wait, this isn't a colony. I felt like throwing up at the units of this pathetic world that didn't even have a tertiary industry. The thought that these units were even shittier than the Imperial system made me lose my breath.
"What's 1 Chi?"
"It's about 24cm... Is it really that big?"
"What a bluff..."
Marika and the Murim Alliance Leader hag were pricking my pride.
"Give me a drink. I don't think I can do this sober."
"Fufu, so you want to receive a cup from this lady... Ah! I'll give it to you...! Stop shaking me!"
It couldn't be helped. I grabbed the glass the Alliance Leader set down and took a sip. My head spun, and confidence surged through me.
First, I took off my pants.
"Eek?!"
The Murim Alliance Leader suddenly covered her eyes with both hands and let out a sound that didn't suit her at all. Marika also looked flustered, scooting back while still seated. Their reactions were like those of virgins, which was great.
"Look closely. And don't tell anyone."
Even without trying to get hard, since I was in the prime of my youth and on a trip without a bitch to drain my semen, my flesh club instinctively surged with power the moment my pants came down.
"W-Wow... Whoa..."
Though she covered her eyes with her hands, Jin Ryu-hwa couldn't close her mouth as she peeked through the gaps in her fingers.
"M-My god... I expected it to be b-big, but..."
And my master and concubine, Marika Olgaevabich—or rather, the Blood Hand Demon King known as Hahou Ju in this world—was also in awe.
"Come closer and look! Hurry up!"
"W-Wait a second...! J-Just a second...! A monster-sized... b-brat..."
It was time to give a proper sex education to this perverted Murim Alliance Leader who had been acting like a saint while scouting for younger men.
"Marika, you come closer and look too! From now on, when you talk about my size, you better be accurate!"
"You just said not to tell anyone..."
"Then don't look, Marika!"
Perhaps because she’d had quite a bit to drink, the white-haired tanned delinquent sister, who would normally have run away or pulled my pants back up saying this wasn't right, started creeping closer on all fours.