Chapter 110: I Thought We Were Just Playing in the Water!
Translator: RaidenTL
Chapter 110: I Thought We Were Just Playing in the Water!
Most people in the Police Agency knew my face, but seeing as she inferred who I was just by hearing my name, she seemed to be someone from a related department.
“Do you know my mom?”
“Ah, yes… a colleague…? We work together. You can call me Auntie Caroline Polshen.”
“What kind of work do you do, Auntie Caroline?”
“I’m a civil servant. Just a civil servant.”
“Whoa~ Civil servants are so cool!”
The woman let out a small chuckle, seemingly finding me adorable. I had been hoping she was one of my mom’s subordinates, so I was a bit disappointed.
“Thank you for playing with our Nadya. You said you just started school, right? Then Nadya is two years older than you, a big sister?”
The brat, who had been on the verge of tears beside her, widened her eyes and looked at me. Then, she gave a villainous smirk. It was obvious she thought she’d won just because she was two years older. Kids these days….
“I was playing with Nadya Noona, and she fought off some mean older girls who were bullying her! I tried to stop them, but I ended up swallowing some water! So I thought she should have some too!”
“Right, right. That happens.”
Because I was young and, more importantly, a male, I could get away with almost anything.
“No, Mom, that’s not it…!”
“Nadya. That’s enough.”
When her mother spoke sternly in a low voice, Nadya pouted and shut her mouth tight. Stupid brat. She didn't seem to realize that complaining or acting indignant was utterly pointless here.
I was an incredibly precious male. I had already set the stage and spun a perfect lie; there was no way a mere brat like her could do anything about it.
That was probably why she was glaring at me with such burning eyes.
“Our Nadya just transferred here, so please look after her, okay?”
“Yes~! Caroline Noona!”
“Noona? Hohoho, calling me ‘noona.’ I’m an auntie, dear.”
Looking like she was about to die of happiness, Caroline patted my head, gave a polite nod to Goldie, and led Nadya away.
“So, Master, why exactly did you throw those kids into the water…?”
It seemed my Goldie had been watching me closely. From a distance, it would have looked like friends just joking around, but she was quick on the uptake.
“Ah, Master and I are going to play now, so let’s talk later!”
“Aoi, stay still.”
Goldie caught Aoi with a voice that was unusually low. The normally free-spirited grey wolf sister flinched and slowly set me down. Sensing the heavy atmosphere, Sooty slunk over.
“I mean, isn't that just what happens when kids play together?”
“...Master, why did you put those kids under the water?”
I used to think Goldie was the easiest to handle, but come to think of it, there was no way a woman who stood smiling among the rulers of a city of 300,000 or underground fighting champions was sane.
“Well… you could say it was organized. It wasn't just that they were targeting me because I’m a boy… they came at me like they were prepared… so I thought someone had sent them….”
I was a little intimidated by Goldie’s golden eyes. I usually thought of her as just a perverted, trashy ex-special forces soldier who panted while getting her butt smacked, but her pressure was no joke.
“Even so, I don't think that's something you should be interrogating Master about, Youfei.”
Sooty, the dark elf sister, crossed her arms and glared at Goldie with a tilted head.
“No, what I’m curious about is who taught him that method. Master. Who taught you?”
Honestly, even a newborn would know the age-old truth that the person who asks the question already knows the answer, but the person who taught me how to extract information by watching a person’s complexion and timing things down to the second was someone else.
“...Well, I taught him well, didn't I?”
“Lisar! You crazy bitch!”
Youfei immediately launched a spear-hand strike at Lisar. I wanted to clap at the sight of the dark elf sister hitting the ground with a pathetic squawk, but Aoi Takahara grabbed me by the armpits and quickly moved us away.
“What did you learn from Youfei, Master?”
“How to create a deadline, how to erase my presence, how to check if an enemy’s concentration has dropped, how to control my breathing, and how to search for cover and concealment!”
“...You learned all that at once?”
“Just the theory!”
Whitey giggled and pressed down on my head as she stroked it.
“I’ve never professionally taught anyone like Youfei has, so do you want to play a dodging game?”
“A dodging game?”
“Yeah, yeah. I’ll shoot water, and Master has to dodge it.”
It sounded like it might actually be fun, so I handed her the mana-driven water gun (capable of rapid fire) tucked into my waistband. For the record, Lisar bought it for me.
“Huh? Why are you giving this to me?”
“Didn't you say you were going to shoot water?”
Whitey blinked and then giggled as if I were being cute.
“That’s too slow. No, I’m going to use this. Bang~!”
A stream of water erupted from Whitey’s calloused fingertip. It was moving at a speed that was almost impossible to react to.
Slap!
“Ouch!”
“It’s only fun to dodge if it’s at this level. I held back quite a bit considering Master’s physical abilities. Did you see it?”
“A little?”
“Then let’s practice dodging this first.”
“Wait, what?”
Aoi Takahara took a step back and pointed her index finger straight at me.
“Bang!”
It was coming. The moment that thought crossed my mind, I hugged the ground like a frog to dodge.
“Yes, yes, good job. Well done. As expected of my Master!”
“W-Wait a second! Whitey! Whitey! Let me prepare myself mentally!”
Bang. Aoi Takahara let out a snicker and shot another stream of water. I hurriedly raised my left hand.
“Bang!”
This time it was my left thigh. I saw it, but—
Slap.
“Ow!”
“Don't try to dodge after seeing it. No, actually, you can dodge after seeing it. If you’re capable of that.”
Aoi extended her index finger as if to show me. I concentrated on dodging, but—
Slap!
Once again, a stream—or rather, a clump of water—flew at me and struck my shoulder.
“It’s evasion practice. Dodging rifle bullets is the bare minimum, after all.”
“Why is that the minimum…? Eek?!”
Aoi extended her finger again and fired a clump of water. Only then did I understand what she meant by not dodging after seeing it. Since the water was being fired in a straight line from the tip of her finger, she was telling me to dodge in advance.
“Oh~! Good, good. Let’s raise the difficulty a bit.”
“No, why all of a sudden?! Let’s go for a walk, doggy! Want me to smack your butt? Huh? Huh?”
“It’s not because you said you’d never go to a water park with us! It’s just that we’ve become a ‘little’ serious about you, Master.”
Aoi snickered and held up her other index finger. The streams of water doubled. More importantly—
“You weren't serious before!?”
“Well, we thought you were a good Master, but you’re still a boy, right? Our upper limit for expectations was really low. Bang~!”
I rolled along the ground to dodge the area where Aoi’s fingertips were pointing.
“But just like now, the upper limit keeps rising. So we’re becoming a ‘little’ serious about teaching you. Bang~!”
I dodged Whitey’s attack and pushed myself up.
“Then what about the strength training, killing techniques, suppression martial arts, and qigong we usually do?”
“Ah, those were for self-defense.”
Aoi Takahara replied, her eyes curving into crescents.
“You said Whitey was an underground fighting champion! A descendant of the Moonlight Wolf!”
“Huh? That’s true, why?”
My pet was a total fraud.
“This is magic! How are you using it?!”
“Huh? This is just the basics, isn't it? Didn't you learn this, Master?”
I wanted to smack her butt and ask where this Magic Boxer TRPG setting had crawled out from. Meanwhile, the way the water clumps ambushed me every now and then was truly artistic.
“Hindel said she’d tell me when I’m older…!”
“The Chairwoman is just too overprotective. Now, you’ve gotten used to two, right?”
Aoi snapped her fingers, and five clumps of water, shaped like her hands, appeared.
“Let’s stop for now, people are watching….”
“Ah, right. Everyone’s watching, so fingers aren't very stylish. Here, here, they’re shaped like pistols now. Cool, right?”
Our Whitey… no, your Whitey seemed to have caught rabies.
“It’ll cause trouble for other people! Let’s do this next time!”
A rod is the only medicine for a mad dog, but unfortunately, the 'rod' I possessed was something I planned to sell at a very high price, and I only intended to bestow it upon my pets after it had been thoroughly worn down. Thus, I had to rely on dialogue and compromise.
“It’s fine, this is a place Youfei owns.”
“...I wondered how you bribed the kids!”
Aoi let out a shout in a voice full of excitement, wearing a villainous smile befitting a mad champion of the underground arena.
“Bang~!”
“Aaaaagh!”
“Come on, Master! You dodged again? One more!”
“Hey!!!!”
As if she had no fear of the future, Whitey added one more water gun (?) every time I dodged.
“If I get hurt, I’m telling Hindel! I’m telling Marika!”
“I know Master’s body better than anyone, so it’s fine. It’ll just hurt like hell! There won't be any scars, and the Chairwoman said this much is okay! Bang!”
“Gyaaaaak!”
“Bang!”
“Gwaaaaak!”
“Bang!”
“Kieeeeek!”
That damn 'bang bang' sound echoed until I went limp and could no longer move.
“...I’m going to kill you. Aoi Takahara. I’m going to get you pregnant and leave you to raise the kid alone without taking any responsibility.”
“Hahaha, usually the mom raises the kid alone anyway. It’s fine, it’s fine!”
I thought a world where one could be an irresponsible breeding uncle might be okay—except for the part where my bones ached and my muscles were squeezed to their limit, making it impossible to move, even if my skin wasn't torn or swollen!
“...You said you were going to play with him. Why is Master dead?”
“Ah, I just gave him a little training. Where did Youfei go?”
“She said she was going to pay the mercenaries, but I don't know what that means.”
It seemed she had gone to pay settlement money to the kids I had 'drowned' (physically). No, why give them settlement money? Under international law, mercenaries don't need to be treated as legitimate prisoners of war!
“...Master is okay, right?”
Sooty was worrying about me. I was a little touched.
“Yeah, he’s breathing fine, nothing’s broken, and he’s not hurt!”
“My heart is broken….”
“Hahaha, our Master is so full of humor.”
Whitey, who had me tucked under her arm, burst into a loud laugh.
“I’m going to tell Marika everything… I’ll tell her to scold you… I’ll tell her to beat you like dogs…!”
“Hahaha, our Master is just too cute~!”
Whitey rubbed her face against my cheek. Normally, I would have pushed her away or even slapped her, but I had no strength left in my body. It was obvious I was going to die from muscle pain tomorrow.
“Oh, right, I haven't told the Boss about our schedule yet. Master. Peace~! Do a peace sign~!”
“Come on, Master. Please smile~!”
Sooty and Whitey put their arms around my shoulders with me in the middle and made peace signs. Whitey moved the camera around, seemingly having trouble getting the focus right.
“Just kill me…!”
“What are you two doing?”
Goldie arrived.
“Help me…! Goldie…!”
“You must have had a fun time with Master, Aoi? Ah, Master, you’re going to suffer from muscle pain tomorrow, aren't you?”
“Oh, Youfei’s here. Take a picture for us.”
“Oh, uh-huh… To send to the Boss?”
Goldie took the phone and stepped back to take a photo of us.
“I’ll kill you… all of you….”
“Master, I love you so much~! Ah, let’s take one with us kissing his cheeks!”
“Isn't that a bit too bold? Ah?! T-That’s cheating!”
I thought she was going to stop Whitey, but as soon as she saw Aoi Takahara kiss my cheek, the dark elf sister kissed my other cheek.
It didn't feel bad, but the grudge inside me increased by 4.