It's Only Right, Isn't It? (1)
‘Dealing with the Skeleton Demon King.’
That alone was House Eshua's sacred mission — the very reason for its existence. At least, it had been ever since the Skeleton Demon King first appeared.
But the Eshua of today was a house whispered about as one whose faith had grown too weak to capture the Demon King. A house said to be cursed by the Demon King himself. A house, some claimed, that even the gods had turned their backs on, now fading into decline.
And then, in the midst of all that, the light had appeared.
The Remains of the Skeleton Demon King!
The moment it was discovered, every nation on the continent had thrown itself at it like starving dogs at a bone. And not only humans, either — demons, dragons, every last thing the world had to offer came clawing for a piece. The Demon King's body was worth exactly that much. The Magic Empire had even floated the preposterous offer of handing over several entire countries for a single miserable shard of bone.
In the end it had passed into the Saintess's hands — because she was the only soul alive who wouldn't dream of turning a profit from the Demon King's flesh. Ironic, given that she was his sworn nemesis, but there was no denying it: those remains were the single most valuable asset House Eshua owned.
Of course, who could have guessed they'd lock the thing away in a treasure vault only children could enter — only for a spell capable of tracking demonic souls to be developed out of nowhere?
And then Isaac strolled in and swiped it, as if to say look what I found.
Just how adorable would the baby look right now?
Admittedly, there was a great deal still to confirm — how Isaac had carried the thing out in the first place, whether he'd actually processed a demon with the Saintess's power, what on earth had happened inside that vault. But the most important thing right now was taking the remains straight to the Matriarch—
"AAAGH!! Isaac!"
Take it to her, my ass!
"Isaac! Spit! Spit it out!!"
The people of House Eshua were frantically pounding the boy on the back, all of them in a mad scramble to pry open his tiny mouth and fish out whatever foreign object he had swallowed.
"Is it stuck? Is it in his throat?!"
"N-no, my lord! I can't see it!"
"Then how did something that size go down?!"
"Isaac? There's a good boy? SPIT!!"
The adults turned him upside down, pressed on his chest, tried everything under the sun — and all Isaac did was burp.
"Urp. (That hit the spot.)"
"Good heavens, what do we do now?!"
"……"
Amid the adults' frantic chaos, Shuri could only stare, his expression screaming: You actually ate that thing? So that's why his face had looked so strange coming out of the vault.
I knew it the second he shoved it straight into his mouth.
Hadn't every one of the children stood there in open horror, watching a baby lick a bone like it was a candy? They'd tried to snatch it too, of course — and been rewarded with a slap apiece. No, wait, damn it all, one slap would have been merciful.
Shuri, who had taken what felt like dozens of blows, wore the serene face of a man who had achieved enlightenment.
The adults, on the other hand, were despairing in an entirely different sense.
"Dear God! Do you have any idea what that thing is?!"
This wasn't simply a question of value. That was the flesh of the Demon King himself! The most dangerous core in the entire world, in a single word!
The baby merely holding it had been problem enough — but touching something and swallowing it were catastrophically different matters.
"No human body can withstand it! The gods' blessing or not, his body is going to burst apart!"
This was the thing that had razed an entire vast forest to rubble with one measly fragment of bone. Even an ordinary Magic Core was lethal to a nursing infant — and this was the Demon King's mana, no less. As far as humans were concerned, it was a ticking time bomb!
"Isaac? Good boy? Give it back! Spit! SPIT IT OUT!!"
"Ttah-aang! (Not a chance, you bastards.)"
Too late!
It's on a direct line to my stomach now!
Isaac wiped his mouth with one hand, smooth as anything.
These cursed bastards nearly scared me to death.
No, no lying — he had genuinely been terrified. Soul tracking, of all things!
Where in the hell were these lunatics planning to stalk me from?
Well, they said there was only one of these in the whole world, so it should be fine now.
No more of that location-tracking garbage ever again!
Shut it!
He was eliminating every last sliver of possibility, that was all!
And besides — stuffing it inside his body meant he didn't have to bother sucking the mana out, so wasn't that a win? And the prayers of 「Survival」 seemed to work even better when things went straight into the stomach!
Hey, aren't you about to get a promotion yourself?
What do you mean, 'but'?! If anything, a body like this is the exciting part! Who knows what new power I might get!
Granted, he had no idea why those remains had been here in the first place.
The important thing is that those holy-faction bastards were using my body.
Isaac recalled the subordinate who had appeared, taken a slap across the face from him, and vanished. The demon had drawn on every scrap of holy power Isaac had stockpiled in his ring, gathering the largest light it could into its palm — all to disguise the use of mana.
And when Isaac had released only a fingernail's worth of mana to slash it across the cheek, even that tiny trace had apparently been enough for the demon to recognize its master. Barely believing its own eyes, the subordinate had trembled as it reached out to caress him. The flood of telepathy pouring into his head was a bonus.
"I knew you would come back to us alive."
Well, I wasn't exactly alive, but I was reborn as a human, so I suppose returning alive is accurate enough.
"Every fiber of my being yearns to serve at your side this instant, but I am currently… uhh…"
And with only those words, the demon had vanished.
Well, thanks to it clearing out, the Skeleton Demon King's thumb had come free without a whisper of suspicion. But seriously, you—
Finish your damn sentences before you go!
How did you turn into a mute blockhead while I was gone?
I have questions! A mountain of them!
And you're owed a slap on your way out, you know!
Isaac was still sulking about it. Why was the Demon King's own finger stashed away in the holy faction's back pocket? And who told you to shapeshift into a doll wearing a god's face and open up old traumas, you son of a—
Ah. So it's two slaps, not one. Fantastic.
In any case — after the subordinate vanished, Kina Berith had definitely muttered something along these lines:
"That is a demon the Papal House has been keeping in custody. How could it possibly end up with a nobody family like Eshua—!"
Chewing on those words all over again, Isaac looked up at the sky.
'Ha. Haha.'
HAHAHAHA!
"TTAHAHAHAHA! TTAA-AHAHAHA!"
It was so funny no laughter would come out at all.
I'm sorry — the WHAT house?
These sons of bitches had my subordinate in custody this whole time?
And not just that — they had the gall to use MY body to turn my own subordinate into the Papal House's lapdog?
He had no idea what had happened in the intervening years, but he could paint the picture well enough.
The Fourteen Six Demons had been the Skeleton Demon King's closest confidants — his strongest lieutenants. Not one of them was the type to ever bow to the holy faction. Least of all to the Papal House, the gods' own errand-runners.
'A demon like that would sooner choose death.'
And yet the thing he'd met had worn the broken, hollowed-out look of a mind shattered into pieces — one glance was enough to see it was anything but sane. But that demon's loyalty ran bone-deep; there was no way it could have simply walked past its master's flesh. Rather than hand it over to the other rabble, it must have volunteered to play the holy faction's dog — holding the remains safe until its master, perhaps still alive, might come to reclaim them.
'Not that the Pope's side would ever accept a proposal from a demon. So naturally, the offer must have come from them…'
Isaac clicked his tongue. Idiot.
It was just a body. Why would you debase yourself that far over your master's leftover flesh?
But it had kept the demon's loyalty intact, so — he'd dig it out, free it, and have a nice long chat about that Demon King impersonator while he was at it.
Ah, right. After killing it about ten times first.
'You dared to wear a god's face? Squish.'
Maybe this was all part of the trial, but the more he thought about it, the more twisted those bastards became. At any rate, if the Pope's grandson hadn't asked him to break the Third Vault's seal, he never would have crossed paths with that demon at all — and if he hadn't, he'd have come this close to missing a critically important piece of information.
Not that those bastards needed a reason to screw him over — they'd have done it anyway. But this time, he fully intended to return the favor.
'Though I suppose I ought to wreck these ones first.'
Isaac watched this life's family scurrying frantically around the room.
"Where's the purgative?! We're getting that thing out if it's the last thing we do!"
"A laxative! Yes!"
"No, an emetic!"
"……"
Jesus. What are you people planning to feed a baby?
Not that he was complaining. Those emetics and laxatives the little brats had dissolved in water for him — hadn't they carried mana of their own?
'Could it be the nastier medicines here are brewed with Magic Cores?'
Because if so, that was pure profit.
And fair enough — Isaac was aiming for power far beyond what he'd originally had. His subordinate's predicament had taught him something.
'No matter how much the Papal House hates demons, they could never have captured my subordinate that easily.'
Then where had the power come from — the power to subdue one of the Skeleton Demon King's own lieutenants?
'The gods' help. It has to be.'
He was certain of it. And with his subordinate kidnapped on top of everything, did they really think a petty little prank would settle the score?
'If I want to tear them limb from limb, the 10th Tier won't quite cut it.'
The Transcendental Tier — the realm above the 10th Tier! He'd never reached it in his old life; a skeleton's limitations had seen to that.
'The realm even the gods struggle to touch. I'll set foot in it first.'
A cold gleam flickered through Isaac's eyes. And for that, his entire method of training would need to change from the ground up.
'Well — I still don't know why I had to reincarnate into the Saintess's family of all bloodlines. Or why this kid happened to be named Isaac. But honestly? It worked out beautifully.'
A Saintess family hated by the gods was, in fact, the perfect launchpad for beating those bastards black and blue. And to pull that off…
"Rillai! This is an emergency — strong medicine, whatever you've got! Bring it here!"
Yes! The pricier the better!
"We have to get it out before the Matriarch arrives!"
Right — wallet in hand, out the door before Melissa shows up!
Meanwhile, House Eshua's guests were sweating for an entirely different reason. And understandably so, given the spectacle unfolding before their eyes.
As if it weren't enough that Eshua's nursing infant had already outshone the leading Saint candidates, the child had swallowed the Demon King's remains and was somehow still alive — and now this?
"I believe that concludes the matters at hand."
The Emperor, summoning Cardinal Verith on House Eshua's behalf? Along with the parents of every child who'd been inside the Third Vault, no less?
The nobles were protesting in the chamber next to the one where Isaac lay.
"Did your son truly ask for the demon in the Third Vault to be released?"
"If this is true, how do you intend to answer for it?!"
"The Red Ducal House sent their child to that vault! The families that produced Saint candidates will hardly stand idle when they hear of this!"
"How dare you call yourselves guardians of a Saint while throwing others into mortal danger!"
"Who knows what would have happened if that child had been anyone but Eshua's!"
"And was it not a Verith man — that Bishop who tried to assassinate Eshua's infant, if the rumors hold?"
Cardinal Verith's brow climbed. Who could have predicted that Eshua's nursing babe — a boy, at that — would grow this popular? No, if anything, the majority had once distrusted House Eshua outright.
But that cursed Emperor had smoothly manufactured this entire gathering, and now wore an artfully innocent expression as he spoke.
"It seemed you all had a great deal to say to one another, so I took the liberty of arranging this meeting. Eshua has suffered a small mishap and left me to preside in their stead — though I confess I feel rather guilty, detaining a Cardinal so busy he'd normally be gone before the festival even ends."
Verith's eyebrows twitched. The man was playing Eshua's attack dog with his whole chest.
Yet the Cardinal's face quickly settled into a courteous smile. "Not at all, Your Majesty. You have merely prepared a seat I ought to have arranged myself — the embarrassment is entirely mine."
A bald-faced lie. A seat? Since when did he owe a single ounce of consideration to nobodies who couldn't squeak in front of the Papal House?
He'd never imagined Eshua's infant would eat the Demon King's remains — but if anything, this was an opportunity.
'Rot or not, a herring is still a herring. A blessed body of the Saintess's line won't die right away.'
The original plan had been to extract the remains from Isaac's body himself, playing the savior, and thereby reforge his old covenant with House Eshua. He could hardly allow the Saintess's line to claw its way up as Saint-material on the back of a problem he conveniently solved.
But then—
"A mere infant vanquishes a demon in spectacular fashion, and even presses treasures into the hands of the other candidates. Truly worthy of the name Eshua."
At the Emperor's words, a murmur rippled through the room. Judging by the sidelong glances drifting toward House Verith, it was painfully obvious what they were thinking. And sure enough—
"They say Eshua's boy is cursed, you see. With the Saintess's line still whole, unlike all those 'rumors,' I imagine the Papal House sleeps easier these days. Wouldn't you agree?"
And I wonder exactly where those rumors originated?
At the Emperor's pointed look, the Cardinal answered with nothing but a curl of his lips where his eyes should have smiled.
"Indeed, Your Majesty. The children were simply summoned and made to compete, as the rules demanded — but with you casting such aspersions, my poor Kina will be too ashamed to show his face for some time. I shall see that he reflects quietly in seclusion. Shall we call the matter closed?"
I'll rein him in just enough, and we end this here.
But the Emperor smiled. "Children may be forgiven such things. Their parents, however, must answer for them — would you not say?"
"—!"
That bastard—
"Quite right! A child nearly died! How could any parent sit quietly?!"
"They say if the child hadn't been an Eshua, he would truly have perished!"
Cardinal Verith swept his gaze over the raised voices of the assembled parents.
'Provincial minor nobles, every last one of them.'
He could see it plainly — after this incident, the families from the Third Vault were all angling to attach themselves to House Eshua. What good were vermin like that? Though, granted, one or two houses among them…
…were painfully valuable to lose. Well. Opportunities would come again.
"Very well. As an apology and a comfort to the children and parents who suffered on account of our Kina, House Verith shall send each family a fitting compensation."
"Ooooh."
"If that settles the matter, then I really must—"
"It doesn't settle anything."
I beg your pardon?
When the Cardinal looked up, the Emperor was grinning — the grin of a man about to reveal the true main course.
"Your son nearly brought harm to the event's hosts, did he not?"
The hosts? What—
"Had anything befallen those children, House Eshua — the host of the Doljabi — would inevitably have shouldered a burden it did not deserve. Which is why, to House Eshua—"
"—!"
"—and above all, to the 'infant' of House Eshua who cleaned up after your son's mess, an appropriate token of gratitude is owed. It's only right, is it not?"
"……!"
Crrrack.
One could practically hear the blood rushing from Cardinal Verith's forehead.
Gratitude? To WHO, exactly?
Left to his own devices, the man would have dumped every ounce of responsibility on the hosting house and sailed away. And yes, the Emperor was clearly fond of Isaac Eshua — clearly wanted to toss the little brat a bone. But—
"What's this? You object?"
"…Not at all."
The Cardinal's brow furrowed at the sound of cheering drifting in from far away.
Gratitude. To that…
"That's it, Isaac! There we go! One more push! Puuush!"
"Yes! Push, push! You're doing wonderfully! Here it comes! It's coming!"
"Rillai! Quickly, check for the bone! Is it out? Is it out?!"
…To that little brat, taking a dump?