The Most Important Thing for a VTuber

I stared at my phone screen and let out a low hum.

“Hmm…”

I’d uploaded exactly one post yesterday to keep my promise to Ha Jiyeon, and now I had over five thousand followers. The scary part was that the number was still climbing. When I checked the comments under the post, there were already over a hundred.

The temperature difference was wild. I was so used to seeing nothing but gallery comments that getting showered with affection on a normie SNS felt surreal.

It was kind of like becoming a minor celebrity. Still, I wasn’t exactly thrilled about it.

Getting hyped up for your looks gets old after the first couple times. Once it repeats over and over, you just go numb. I guess I really am an emotionless psychopath, because none of it moved me. If anything, it made me laugh.

“Heh heh heh heh heh…”

“What are you looking at that’s got you giggling by yourself?”

“Hah!”

I’d been cackling at my phone when Ha Jiyeon suddenly walked over. By the way, we were in Jiyeon’s Clothing Shop. I’d come in for my usual part-time fitting model gig.

And of course I got caught staring at my own photos and laughing. A little embarrassing… maybe.

“Ah, you’re checking your Instar. I saw the photo you posted yesterday too. Thanks for keeping your promise!”

Apparently Ha Jiyeon didn’t think anything of it. Come to think of it, we followed each other, so of course she would’ve seen my post.

“A promise is a promise. It wasn’t even that hard anyway.”

“So humble~ Ufufu. By the way, after you posted yesterday, the number of followers on our official shop account went up too. Doesn’t that basically make you an influencer already~?”

“I-influencer is a bit of a stretch… haha.”

I said that, but inside I was grinning ear to ear.

Me? An influencer? Just clicking a button to upload a photo and getting showered with love from all directions? The thought alone felt amazing.

But…

“How about posting regularly from now on? If you keep it up, you could actually get really famous.”

“Hmm…”

Now this was tricky.

Too much attention would be a problem. I was a VTuber aspirant, after all. I had zero interest in becoming famous on a normie SNS like this.

I should turn her down.

“Haha… I’m too lazy to think about—”

“Oh! I heard that once you get big on Instar, you get tons of sponsorship deals and make bank. I’d love to sponsor you myself. Obviously I’d pay you for every post~”

“I’ll do it.”

Rejection cancelled.

I needed money. I had to buy an avatar… yeah, yeah.

After finishing my shift today with my usual diligence (aka slacking off), I came home, took a quick shower, and flopped onto the sofa wearing nothing but my underwear. Then I opened the gallery.

Let’s see, let’s see. What kind of posts were up today?

Summary of what the Legend Fighter pro Nikik said on his personal stream:

Nikik: So this is the person who blocks Narak? Let’s take a look.

Nikik: Whoa… she’s actually blocking it really well. She’s not even sitting—she stands up and times her crouch perfectly the moment the Narak comes out.

Nikik: (after watching the full clip) She really blocked everything… There’s no way she’s cheating in an arcade, so…

Nikik: Hmm… From what I can tell, it looks like she’s blocking by sound. In arcades, you can hear the stick click when someone uses a big move like Narak, so it’s possible to react to the sound.

Nikik: Blocking it by sight is literally impossible for a human. Haha.

Conclusion: Sight-blocking is impossible, apparently.

“Hmm.”

Some kind of heated debate about me was going on. After digging around a bit, it looked like the clip of my match against Jam-ssam had spread everywhere as a short and was causing a huge stir.

I’d done a little ego-searching about last night’s stream before falling asleep. I never expected it to blow up like this.

Oh well. Time for the gallery’s mediator to step in.

Tap tap tap.

I just checked and it looks like things are getting way too heated.

I’m locking the Nikik bait now. If you want to discuss it, go to the fighting game gallery.

Let’s go back to talking about Bangmwingi-nim like usual haha

As soon as I posted, the haters in the gallery started roasting me like always. But the Nikik talk died down pretty quickly.

“Heh.”

Success. I created a common enemy called “me” and brought peace back to the gallery.

This must be what it feels like to be the Dark Knight… yeah, yeah.

I killed time watching shorts until it was exactly seven o’clock, then started the stream.

-Whoa

-Kyaaaaaaa

-It’s here it’s here wwwwww

-She finally turned it on

-Explain the block controversy explain the block controversy explain the block controversy

-Mwing-ha

-Let’s smack her first lol let’s smack her first lol

-I might’ve missed her a tiny bit… I might’ve missed her a tiny bit…

The moment I started streaming, forty loyal soldiers took their seats and set the chat on fire. Wait, hold on—had the number of loyal soldiers increased?

It kept going up. Fifty. Sixty. Seventy.

Did the clickbait title actually work?

Probably. The floating users who saw the clip of me fighting Jam-ssam must have come flooding in.

“Hey everyone, hiii. What’s with the Mwing-speak today? Heh. And what do you mean ‘explain’? I already told you I blocked it by pure luck.”

I didn’t want ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠to make this any bigger than it needed to be, so I kept it simple. It was better to hide my power than show it off. That was way cooler… hehe.

-I came from the fighting game gallery, what’s this about being a VTuber aspirant?

-Your voice is nice

-You wrote the title like you were gonna explain the controversy but it’s actually dogshit content

“…You wrote the title like you were gonna explain the controversy but it’s actually dogshit content? Hey, I literally just explained it. Sorry for the clickbait title. But isn’t it a huge win that people like you came in? Puhuhuhu. Hello to all the new viewers~ Please take your seats!”

Now that I’d sucked in some new blood with the title, I immediately changed it.

“Alrighty~ Following yesterday, shall we continue our research on VTubers~?”

-LFG LFG

-Huh?

-Ah

-Sigh…

-Seated seated lololol

-Kyaaaa

-It’s already peak content lololol (holy shit)

-Brought another piece of garbage content again lol

-Just sing Eden already you brat lol

-Today was actually so fun T_T T_T

“What do you mean it was fun? I haven’t even started yet, you idiots!”

These guys were unbelievable. When a small streamer prepares original content instead of just gaming, shouldn’t they be praising me? The normal reaction should be “Oh,” or “Sounds fun,” not “Brought another piece of garbage content~ lol.”

And the people begging for Eden were still there, as persistent as ever.

I should probably do it sometime… hmm.

“Stop messing around and pay attention. Attention!”

Ahem.

I cleared my throat lightly, leaned close to the mic like a radio host, and spoke.

“What do you all think is the most important thing ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠for a VTuber? We already covered voice last time so let’s skip that.”

-Oh

-That’s a bit close… a bit close… a bit close…

-Ugh

-Sudden whisper ASMR what is this…

-I can hear her breathing… I can hear her breathing…

-Is today an ASMR stream?

“Aaaah come on, just answer my question!!”

These bastards had zero intention of actually answering me.

Sigh… I really didn’t want to bring this out again.

Fine. Baby regression mode: ON.

“Huuu… Ningdeul not gonna answer my queshion? If you don’t, I’ll keep using this way of talking all night?”

-?

-AHAHAHAHA

-What the fuuuuuck lol

-It got even worse than yesterday lololol

-So cute lololol

-I think it’s cute though?

-Whoa it sounds so good… whoa it sounds so good…

-We’ll answer so please stop…

“Puhuhuhu…”

Finally looking this way, huh. The Mwing-brains had surrendered to my baby regression voice.

Anyway, the chat slowly started filling up with what people thought was important for VTubers.

Singing. Gaming skill. Model quality. And so on…

All kinds of opinions were flying in, but unfortunately none of them were the word I had prepared for today’s content.

“Don’t you guys have any other opinions? Is that all?”

-Yep

-She already decided on the answer and is just fishing for it lol

-Ugh, answer-begging bitch

-Mwing just say it yourself

Hmm. Maybe I should just say it. This is getting a little annoying.

While I was thinking that—

Ding~

The donation alert rang. I thought the word I was waiting for had finally appeared, but…

“Aaaaaaaaah.”

-Holy shit breast examiner lololol

-As expected, the virgin detector is the breast examiner lol

-The disguise is so obvious you absolute breast appraiser lol

-Mwingpyong lololol

-Virgin is acknowledged lololol

-No joke, it really is the most important thing

-Virginity is a critical matter for VTubers… Virginity is a critical matter for VTubers…

-Bangmwingi <<< This girl is definitely a virgin right?

-Our Mwingi is definitely a virgin yep

They were all going on about virginity.

…But it is important, though.

For real.