Chapter 34
Slowly, I lifted my eyelids. My hazy vision sharpened as my foggy mind cleared. The world of Ul unfolded before me once more beneath the vast sky. What I faced was a pair of eyes as red as the blood flowing over the altar, gleaming with a thick, madness-fueled intensity.
A cold hand gripped my cheek. The sharp upturn of his eyes softened languidly. Glossy short black curls. A chilling impression like frost on a winter branch. Breathtaking beauty. Eyes flashing coldly red.
'The strong you will protect me, right?' A voice etched clearly into a corner of my heart, carrying a faint warmth.
"Caught you."
It was my half-brother, Kal Crisis.
'......Huh?'
Still hanging upside down, I blinked vacantly. I was perched on quite a high branch, but Kal's height brought his face right in front of mine. His cool demeanor looked even colder than the falling snowflakes. Crimson eyes gazed at me steadily, tinged with a subtle light.
'Holy shit.'
My mouth fell open, my brain freezing. As my legs went slack with a thud, I tumbled from the tree.
"......Whoops."
In that instant, hands caught me mid-fall.
"Uh."
I blinked slowly against the firm chest pressing into my head. A lukewarm warmth seeped through his solid arms. Dazed, I looked up at Kal. A satisfied smile spread across his lips as he gazed down at me.
"This time, I caught you."
'Fall. I'll catch you.'
'Wasn't your left arm injured?'
'A sword like Kal? I can handle that much.'
It reminded me of that midnight in the forest when I'd carried the exhausted Kal in my arms. His eyes crinkled playfully. My face burned red—not just from being caught dangling from the tree like a child, but from crashing right into his embrace.
"I could have landed just fine!"
"For the mighty Mir, what does it matter?"
He chuckled mischievously, tightening his hold on me. Heat rose even to my back.
'Why the hell is Kal here......!'
I bit my lip hard. After dinner, I'd asked Maria, and she'd said Kal had stayed overnight at the magic tower last night and wouldn't return until tonight. And now it was barely past 4 p.m.
"I heard you wouldn't be back until nightfall......?"
"How could I work after learning the Mercenary King is my half-sister?"
'......So he knew.'
Kal smiled brightly, but my body shrank back instinctively. Facing nobles as a mercenary was routine, but facing my brother as his little sister? This was my first time as Kashmir meeting Kal.
'In the original story, Kal...... hated Kashmir.'
I stiffened, recalling the original plot. Kal despised Kashmir—not because she was an illegitimate child from commoner stock. He scorned the nobility's obsession with bloodlines anyway and couldn't care less what Kaiser got up to.
When he'd learned I was illegitimate, he hadn't been disappointed in Kaiser; he'd just been shocked the man could even get excited. That was it.
Kal started truly despising Kashmir when she went after Aria. Remembering what original Kashmir had done to Aria made me want to dunk my head in a pond and never come up—it was that bad. Of course he'd hate her.
'I don't care if that bitch's mom was a commoner or a wolf tribeswoman. Just tell her to stop chasing me to the magic tower and smashing shit.'
Before that, he'd just disliked how she rampaged through the estate and creepily obsessed over him. Even knowing things were different now, the thought made me uneasy.
'What if Kal...... doesn't like Kashmir? He seems fond of Mir, but if he starts despising Kashmir like in the original...... or even turns that on Mir too?'
I bit my lip until it bled. In that brief encounter, I'd already given my heart to Kal—I wasn't sure I could bear his contempt.
"......Put me down, please."
Feeling my pink-tinged excitement sink into deep blue gloom, I tried to shift away. I could have shoved him off with force, but one slip in control might shatter his arm bones, so I stayed put.
"You look pale all of a sudden."
Kal gazed down at me intently, his lips pressing into a line. I started to look up, but dropped my eyes again upon meeting his. I'd imagined a flicker of tender concern in those cool crimson eyes, and I was scared to confirm it was just my delusion.
"It's just a bit chilly. Put me down, and I'll head back on my own."
I mumbled, avoiding his gaze. His stare felt more insistent, cold sweat beading on my skin, when Kal spoke slowly.
"......Do you hate me?"
"......Pardon?"
His voice drooped, melancholic. Doubting my ears, I whipped my head up. Kal stared down with eyes boiling in strange fervor, his face like an abandoned puppy—totally at odds with his gaze.
"Isn't it? You freaked out and fell the second you saw me, went pale, and now you won't even let me hold you. Do you hate me that much?"
"N-No way! How could I ever hate you, Young Master......!"
I stammered, dodging his piercing stare. I didn't hate Kal. If anything, I'd given him too much of my heart, and I didn't know what to do about it.
"They say you're definitely my half-sister, yet you won't even call me by name. Yeah, you must hate me. I followed you on that magic beast hunt without listening, and I wasn't much help anyway...... So you left without a goodbye because you hate me, right?"
"No, wait, what......!"
Kal's brow twitched at "Young Master," then he muttered in a low, gloomy tone. Shadows darkened his face. Guilt crashed over me like I'd committed a grave sin; sweating buckets, I shook my head frantically.
"Absolutely not! I don't hate you at all, Young Master! How could I?"
"Yet you still won't say my name. Aren't you disappointed that the scaredy-cat from back then is your brother?"
Kal drooped his head pathetically. It felt contrived for a split second, but guilt over making him mope overwhelmed me, so I rushed to speak.
"Kal! Kal! I don't hate you at all! I'm thrilled you're my brother!"
Calling his name over and over, Kal's head snapped up. Sweating bullets, I explained carefully.
"I...... I'm just not used to having someone precious. Or dealing with people, really. I was scared I'd mess up with you, that's all."
I confessed haltingly, honestly. With Kal's original history of hating Kashmir, one slip could twist everything.
"So even my little sister is a scaredy-cat."
Finally smiling in satisfaction, Kal adjusted his hold on me. I considered asking to be put down but stayed quiet, not wanting to make him mope again.
"No need to worry about that."
"It's too late for mistakes to make me hate you—we've come too far."
His cryptic words made me tilt my head up at him; he smirked.
"What should I call you?"
"Ah, Kashmir is fine."
"That's just a name."
I blinked, confused, and Kal smiled slowly.
"I mean a nickname."
"Uh...... My little sister calls me Shushu."
"Then I'll call you Shushu too."
The pet name from Kal's lips made me freeze.
"You're my sister now."
I ducked my head, avoiding his tender gaze. For some reason, tears pricked my eyes. Snowflakes swirled down, scattering as if to sweep away my tangled heart.
"Young Master—no, Kal, you don't hate me?"
"Hm?"
His brow quirked; he eyed me expectantly. Cautiously, I spoke.
"I'm an illegitimate child who popped up out of nowhere. A worthless mercenary runt from the back alleys my whole life. Isn't it weirder to feel anything good toward me?"
I recited flatly. Looking back at myself, I couldn't find a single reason I deserved love. I couldn't take those kindnesses at face value—I didn't deserve them.
Kal said nothing. Taking his silence as agreement, I numbly watched my self-esteem drift into the abyss.
"......Listen well."
Kal's face turned icy as he spoke.
"You saved me."
"That was just what anyone would—"
"Not just the magic beast hunt. Long before that, you saved me."
His words carried an unfathomable depth of emotion. So deep, like an endless abyss—gazing into his eyes, I lost myself.
"No one can say otherwise. Not even you. No one can dismiss the meaning of my life like that."
Incomprehensible words, emotions, expression. I stared at Kal, who looked furious.
"Be proud as a Crisis lady—and as my sister. You deserve it."
His voice was cool, but the words burned warm. I bit my lip and squeezed my eyes shut.
"Why are you so good to me?"
It was all a mystery. Kal was a puzzle, an enigma, inexplicable. Even from the start, approaching me with kindness—I still didn't get it.
"You probably can't understand, but......"
He peeled his lips back slowly, curling them into a full smile. White snowflakes blanketed his black hair. The sunset sky painted his head red, rivaling the snow. He leaned down. His ebony locks, beloved by nature, tickled my forehead. A smile bloomed on his near face.
"You pulled me from the abyss of boredom. You gave me life."
Something soft and warm touched my forehead. Kal kissed it—just like I'd kissed his in the winter forest not long ago.
"Loving you is inevitable for me. Always will be. So why not relax and enjoy it?"
'What an incomprehensible guy.'
At this point, I knew there was something I didn't know. But I didn't care to uncover it. All that mattered was that I was loved—overwhelmingly so.
I squeezed my eyes shut. If I didn't, I'd ugly-cry. Kal chuckled softly down at me and started walking toward the estate. In the white world where only his footsteps crossed the garden, the sun was setting.