A Glimpse of the Past (1)
The winter was coming, bringing with it a biting, frigid wind.
Crack!
A harsh sound of friction echoed through the opulent yet cold drawing room. It was a sharp, merciless, and decisive sound.
“Next.”
The man who had delivered the slap spoke in a solemn voice, his tone as indifferent as if this were a routine occurrence. A boy with silver hair streaked with black, a composed expression, and deep blue eyes stepped forward.
“Gelberin.”
“Yes.”
“I received a report from the Magic Tower. I heard your thesis was rejected.”
The man muttered calmly as he began to wipe his hand with a handkerchief.
“I apologize.”
The man didn’t respond. He simply stepped in front of the boy named Gelberin and, with a violent twist of his body, struck him across the cheek again. Gelberin’s head snapped to the side, and blood began to trickle from his split lip.
“Pathetic.”
“…”
The man—a figure with piercing blue eyes and blue epaulets adorning his shoulders. This was how the daily routine of Lokgurd Payless, the head of the Payless family, began.
Though his hair was whitening and his face was etched with wrinkles, his status as a former imperial court mage was absolute within the family. No one dared to challenge his actions. In fact, some even considered his cold-bloodedness to be the very essence of the Payless name and took it for granted.
“Next.”
As Gelberin retreated, a girl walked forward. A girl with silver hair and blue eyes. She was the child who bore the closest resemblance to Lokgurd. She walked cautiously and stood before him.
“Eline.”
“Yes, Father.”
“I heard. You placed third in the entrance exam.”
“…”
Eline, the child most like him. Even so, Lokgurd had no intention of lowering his standards. No, if anything, that was exactly why he held her to an even stricter yardstick.
“I apologize.”
Lokgurd strode forward and stood tall before her; there was a height difference of nearly double between them.
Crack!
A harsh, tearing sound echoed, and the silver-haired girl tumbled helplessly to the floor.
“Both of your older brothers entered as top students, yet you placed third in the written exam?”
As Eline struggled to rise, a bruise began to bloom beside the swollen, red mark on her pale skin.
“It seems I haven’t taught you enough about the weight of our family name, Eline.”
Just as he moved to take another heavy step toward her,
“That is enough.”
It was Clenoa, the mistress of the house, who stopped him.
“Stay out of this.”
Clenoa walked over calmly, looked down at Eline, and spoke.
“The practical exam is in two days. What will you do if those unnecessary bruises cause gossip?”
“…Tsk.”
Lokgurd clicked his tongue and looked over his three children.
“Keep this in mind. Remember what family name stands before you and what responsibilities you must bear. Do not satisfy me; satisfy the family. Do you understand?”
It was a chilling response for a father to give, but no one could refute his words.
“Leave. My head aches.”
At Lokgurd’s gesture, the three children bowed their heads and exited the drawing room. Once outside, the three children walked silently toward their respective rooms, neither speaking nor even glancing at one another.
My head throbbed. My left cheek was aching, and I could taste blood. "Leave." My father's voice, now so familiar. His voice—evaluating, suppressing, and filled with rage—kept echoing in my mind.
I don't think I have ever been loved. From the moment I was born, being scolded and monitored was my entire life.
“…”
I looked in the mirror. My swollen cheek was bruised a deep blue, the burst capillaries throbbing in a grotesque shape. Perhaps because my skin was so fair, the red blood stood out even more. As I slowly brushed my hand over it, I felt a sharp sting.
‘It hurts.’
When the door opened cautiously, Eline flinched and turned her head. But there was only one person who would visit her room at this hour.
The person illuminated by the flickering light was a woman with a gentle air, her black hair braided in a way that added to her elegance. It was her mother, Clenoa.
“…Mother.”
“Come here.”
At her firm words, Eline walked toward Clenoa, who carefully placed her hand on Eline’s cheek. It was an ointment that smelled sticky yet sweet.
“…”
Eline trembled at the warm sensation, but no tears flowed. They had already dried up long ago.
“Eline.”
“Yes, Mother.”
“Are you alright?”
“…”
She did not answer. What did she mean by "alright"? Her body? The exam the day after tomorrow? Or her feelings toward her father?
As Eline looked up cautiously, she saw a faint, tender smile lingering on Clenoa’s ice-cold face. Even so, Eline could not speak. She didn’t know. She didn’t know her own feelings.
From a young age, everything about her had been decided. What she wore, how she washed, when she slept—everything was controlled by her father, Lokgurd, and by the family. Silence hung in the room as Clenoa gently stroked her cheek.
“…I wish you could do what you want.”
Clenoa felt a deep sense of sorrow and apology for having to say this to her daughter, who had lost her smile and become expressionless some time ago.
“If you go to the academy, you’ll be living in the dormitory for three years, won’t you?”
“Yes.”
“Think about it.”
Clenoa couldn’t help but say it, even knowing how hypocritical her words were. She had been controlled for years. Even if she were to gain independence for three years now, she wouldn’t know how to find herself.
‘…’
She had never once thought about what kind of existence she would be if she shed the name Payless.
“Get some rest, and do well on your exam in two days.”
After Clenoa left, Eline lay down quietly in the room where only silence remained. She stared at the ever-silent ceiling and slowly closed her eyes, savoring the only moment she could feel a sense of peace.
When two days had passed, she moved to the academy to take the second exam, the practical test. The winter was bitter, especially since the academy was located on a mountain.
“Name?”
“…Eline Payless.”
“Why are you wearing a mask?”
“I received prior permission.”
Lokgurd, perhaps not wanting his shame to be exposed, had forced her to wear a mask. As a result, she had come wearing a mask that didn’t even fit properly, while her left cheek still throbbed with pain.
The sight of her, hair covered and wearing a mask, drew the gaze of a few people, but they soon looked away, seemingly uninterested.
“…”
Entering the auditorium, she felt a sense of chaos. The sound of students entering, chatting, and muttering magic incantations. It was noisy.
Perhaps it was because her cheek hurt and her body was trembling, but the students’ murmurs felt particularly sensitive to her.
It was a cold winter, and her head was pounding and her body felt chilled, but since she had to wait for a long time, she found a seat in the corner and began to read a book quietly.
If she didn’t take first place in this exam, he probably wouldn’t hit her. Instead, he would lock her in the darkness and make her read books again. He would inflict the terrible punishment of solitary confinement.
…
Eline adjusted the mask that was difficult to keep in place and wrapped her clothes tighter around herself. Perhaps it was because she had sat in the corner to avoid the noise, but the cold felt even more biting.
It was a sensation similar to what she always felt at the Payless mansion—cold, chilly, and indifferent.
‘…’
It was a familiar sensation she always felt, but she couldn’t help the trembling of her body.
Thump, thump.
The sound of someone’s footsteps approached.
“Is this seat taken?”
She turned her head to see a boy. He had black hair with a faint brownish tint, tied up. He was looking at her.
“Sorry, it’s too noisy over there. Is this seat free?”
Eline didn’t say anything, but the boy sat down next to her naturally.
“…”
“You’re even wearing a mask. That’s amazing, is that a concept too?”
‘Noisy.’
As Eline moved slightly to avoid him, the boy moved closer to her side again. Eline, perhaps dumbfounded by his actions, quietly turned her head, only to find the boy staring straight at her.
“…Wow, you’re solving something difficult.”
To be precise, he was staring intently at the book she was reading.
“You’re amazing, are you already solving things like this?”
Things like this. It was a magic formula she had solved countless times, but this boy looked at her with eyes full of awe, as if he couldn’t understand it at all. Of course, Eline did not answer.
“Yeah, well, if you don’t want to talk, fine.”
When she didn’t answer anymore, the boy shrugged, leaned his body against the wall, and appeared to close his eyes to sleep.
He had an air of ease, as if it didn’t matter whether he passed or not. He was a type she had never seen before.
‘…’
The boy sitting next to her might have been an annoying and bothersome presence, but he had become quiet as if he were falling asleep.
Perhaps it was because his rhythmic breathing and the wind coming from his body blocked the chill, but the cold felt like it had subsided a little. It wasn’t bad.
Time passed, and some students began to rise from their seats. It meant the exam would start soon, but since Eline was likely to take the exam last, it wouldn’t be her turn yet. She didn’t pay attention and focused on her book.
And then, “…Hup.” The boy next to her stirred and opened his eyes. He stretched lightly and moved around to loosen his body. “Thanks to you, I slept well. Thank you.”
It was an unexpected greeting.
‘…?’
Eline looked up at him as if she didn’t understand. What was he thanking her for?
The boy didn’t care; he took his hand out of his pocket and held it out toward her.
“Here.”
It was a small, glowing sphere, shimmering with a soft orange light. A low-grade artifact used for heating. It was an item she had never even touched before.
“I warmed it up with my mana. It’ll be very warm. You were shivering.”
Eline did not answer.
“Is this a vow of silence concept too?”
When the boy finally tossed it to her, Eline caught it reflexively, and a warm sensation began to spread through her body from her hands. Eline fiddled with the artifact.
“I’m going in to take the exam now, so I don’t need it. You use it.”
“…”
“Good luck on the exam. Or wait, you were solving such difficult things, so you’ll do well, right?”
The boy looked at her book playfully and offered encouragement.
“Support Magic division! Please gather in front of the auditorium!”
“Hmm… I’m nervous.”
The boy waved his hand lightly and ran toward the crowd.
“…”
Only after watching his back for a long time did Eline look at the heating artifact she was holding. As she gripped it tightly, the warmth began to seep into her body once more.
‘…’
As she looked up, the boy had already disappeared into the crowd.
Eline ignored the slight ripple in her heart and went back to reading her book. She thought of it as a simple, passing encounter. However, she would see that boy two more times in the future.