The Gaze
"Oppa. Let me use the hair dryer too."
"Just a second. I'm not done yet."
"Hurry up."
"Wait a little."
"If you dry your hair late, it gets damaged. Are you going to take responsibility for that?"
"Fine, I'll take responsibility. I'll take it."
"How?"
Ugh. She was exhausting.
I answered halfheartedly as my little sister stood beside me, pestering me for the dryer.
Kang Seoyeon.
Our family's youngest, twenty-one this year.
She had started university last year and moved out on her own, but she still came home on weekends or holidays like this.
"I don't know. I'll dry your hair for you or something."
"Really? You'll dry it for me?"
"No. I was kidding."
"Aww, why not? Drying my own hair is such a pain."
"It's a pain for me too. You dry it."
"I finally come home after so long, and this is how my Oppa treats me? He doesn't even welcome his little sister, and he won't even dry her hair."
She dropped the corners of her eyes and pretended to pout.
That little fox.
There was a reason Seoyeon had turned out this way.
An older sister two years my senior. Me.
And then Seoyeon, a little sister six years younger than me.
The later a child is born, the more they seem like a baby—and when the age gaps between siblings are this wide, the youngest tends to monopolize all the affection.
Our parents, me, and our sister had all cooed over her like a baby and spoiled her rotten. This was the result.
You could call her the thoroughly loved baby of the family.
On top of that, she knew she was cute and had grown into a shrewd girl who knew exactly how to use it.
"You're really not going to do it? For real?"
It wasn't just me she pulled this on.
She used her aegyo on our parents and our older sister too, and usually got whatever she wanted.
…When I heard she'd buttered up our sister and walked away with five hundred thousand won in allowance last time, I'd thought, She's really hit the big leagues.
Maybe that was why.
Even after becoming an adult, Seoyeon was the only one in our family who still overflowed with cute little acts.
Honestly, I didn't hate it.
But I worried she might act like this outside the house too.
…And that some weird guy might latch onto her because of it.
"Fine. I'll dry it. I'll dry it. Just stay still."
"Wow. Oppa's going to dry my hair~ I'm so excited."
Once again, I was the one who lost.
I sighed and nodded, and Seoyeon beamed as she settled into place right there.
I'd dried her hair plenty of times since we were kids, so it wasn't exactly difficult.
What worried me more was whether this would make me late for the café.
As I carefully flipped and dried her hair, I kept fretting about the time.
I really didn't want a repeat of last time's disaster, showing up late and losing my regular seat.
…No, wait. If that happened, I could sit with Seorin, so maybe it would actually be good?
I was staring blankly, lost in that thought, when Seoyeon spoke up.
"Oppa. The effort just disappeared from your hands. What are you thinking about?"
"Huh? What?"
"Hmm. I wonder. Could it be… a girl?"
I flinched.
How the hell did she land on that?
I jerked in surprise at being caught so cleanly. Seoyeon flicked a glance at my face and said,
"What? I was just teasing, but it's real?"
"W-what are you talking about. What girl."
"Nuh-uh~ Your face just now was pure 'gotcha.' It looked exactly like this. You can fool Mom and Dad, but you can't fool me. You know that, right?"
"Whatever. Your hair's done, so go away."
Her instincts were annoyingly sharp when it came to useless things.
To keep her from digging any further, I grabbed her shoulders and gave her a little shove.
Seoyeon stumbled forward a step, then came clattering right back to me.
"It's a girl. It's a girl. Oppa has a girl."
"No, I don't."
"Where? Who is she? Do you have a girlfriend? Or… a crush?"
"I said no."
"So it is a crush. Oppa. Your eyes just flickered a little. Mmm-hmm. Finally, our forever-single Oppa has found love~ Congratulations, Oppa."
Ah. I'd walked straight into her interrogation.
This was bad. Once she latched on, she became a total pain.
Being a girl her age, she was obsessed with romance.
She loved dressing up enough to major in fashion design, after all.
She was always on my case with stuff like, "Oppa, stop rotting in your room all day and go out and date someone. You've got a decent face, it's such a waste."
"All I do all day is job prep. What crush are you talking about?"
"Love can happen anywhere, Oppa. Haven't you watched any dramas?"
"Stop watching so many dramas. Live in reality, Kang Seoyeon."
"I don't care, I don't care. You're the one who spends all day staring at weird anime girl characters."
"They're not anime characters, they're VTubers."
Okay, that one actually stung a little.
"Same difference. Anyway. So where did you meet her? That reading room you always go to?"
"I don't go to a reading room. Do you pay that little attention to your own Oppa?"
"Then where do you go?"
"The café right up the street."
"Ooh. So you met her at the café, huh? Right?"
Ugh.
I seemed to have just tossed a fresh log onto the Kang Seoyeon furnace.
I could almost see the flames roaring in her eyes.
Looking at Seoyeon staring at me with pure fascination, I let out a long sigh.
"I keep telling you there is no such person. More importantly, didn't you say you had plans with your friends?"
"I do. But it's at ten. I've still got some time to kill."
Please don't have free time.
That awkward stretch before a meet-up when there wasn't quite enough time to do anything else.
I had a sinking feeling I'd just handed a bored Seoyeon a shiny new toy.
Whenever this happened, she always stuck to me like glue and stuck her nose into everything.
"So, Oppa."
"What."
"Can I tag along to the café you go to?"
"What? What are you going to do there?"
"I didn't even get to eat this morning 'cause Mom was out, so we can grab something together? Plus I'm curious where you usually study. And I can kill some time watching you do your job prep."
"So you're saying you want to use me as a toy until your meet-up."
"Yep. Be my killing-time entertainment."
She wasn't even trying to hide it anymore.
But looking at the smile playing on her lips, I suspected that wasn't her only motive.
"Is that really all?"
"Well… while I'm at it? I might as well take a peek at what Oppa's crush looks like?"
Yeah, that was definitely the main goal.
From the look in her eyes, she clearly didn't believe a word of my "there's no crush" denials.
Were my lies that transparent?
Then again, I could always tell when Seoyeon was lying just from her face.
Maybe she could do the same to me.
Family was terrifying like that.
"Do whatever you want. Just do whatever. It's not like you'd stay home if I said no. Haah."
"Why are you sighing~ Oppa. Your cute little sister just wants to spend a little time with you."
"Blech."
I shoved her away as she linked her arm through mine and tried to cling.
I wasn't falling for this little fox's schemes again.
"If you're coming, go get ready already. If I'm late I'll lose my seat."
"Yessir. Understood~ Heheh. This is gonna be fun. More importantly, what should I wear today?"
Watching Seoyeon bounce excitedly toward her room, I felt a headache coming on.
"Hey. You going to a fashion show or something?"
"Why? What's weird about it?"
"It's not weird, exactly. It's just… really flashy."
"Better than dressing bland like you, Oppa. I'm a fashion design major. I have to dress at least this well, don't I?"
She held up her phone and checked her face in the camera.
She wasn't wrong.
I did tend to dress pretty simply.
"Leather jacket and mesh stockings in winter is a bit much, though. Even for you."
"Ahem. Late winter is when this kind of fashion really shines, dear Oppa. You just don't get it."
A crop top. Black short shorts.
A leather jacket leading down into mesh stockings—an all-black look.
Paired with the silver piercings in her ears, she radiated the full aura of a model or celebrity.
Honestly, even though I'd said that, it suited her perfectly.
Seoyeon had always been pretty with a great figure; she'd even done some child modeling when she was little.
Even now, busy people rushing to work still stole second glances at her.
"Besides, you have to put in more effort when you're meeting girls. Guys don't really get fashion, but girls notice."
"Oh, is that so?"
So the friends she was meeting today were other girls, apparently.
Chatting about nothing in particular as we walked, we soon arrived at the café I always went to.
"This is it?"
"Yeah. My regular seat's on the second floor."
"The vibe's pretty nice. What kind of desserts do they sell? Anything good for breakfast?"
"I think they have sandwiches and various breads. No pasta, though, probably."
"Okay. Let's go pick something. You're buying, right, Oppa?"
"How did that become a given?"
"You're not seriously going to shake down your poor college-student little sister for meal money, are you?"
"Ugh. The things you say. Fine, I'll buy. I'll buy."
"Yay~ Thanks, Oppa~"
"Okay, got it, now get off me. Shoo."
I pushed her away again as she tried to link arms and pour on the aegyo.
I was a broke job-seeker myself, sure.
But honestly, I barely spent any money, so I wasn't exactly scraping by.
I didn't see many people, and all I did was sit in the café fiddling with PowerPoints all day.
Seoyeon, on the other hand, was at the age where money disappeared fast. Buying her one meal wasn't a burden.
We ordered at the kiosk, got our food right away, and headed up to the second floor together.
"Phew. Seat's still free."
"This is the famous regular spot? Nice location. Wide open by the window."
"If you pull the blinds halfway down like this, the light doesn't hurt your eyes. It's perfect."
"Ooh. You can tell you've been coming here a long time."
It was a little later than usual.
Seoyeon's getting-ready time had made us late, no way around it.
Even so, most of the seats were empty today, so I settled in comfortably.
"Thanks for the meal~ Oppa."
"Yeah. Eat up. This is me treating you."
"Mm. Eating deliciously is the one thing I'm the best at in the whole world."
I nodded and took a bite of my sandwich.
Seoyeon swirled her salad with a fork and popped a bite into her mouth.
With a crisp crunch, her eyes sparkled open wide.
"Mmm? What is this? Oppa, this salad is seriously good. Is this yogurt dressing?"
"Yeah? Glad you like it."
"You try some too."
"What?"
"Hurry. Ah."
She casually scooped up some salad with her fork and held it out to me.
I nodded and opened my mouth.
With such a big age gap, I used to feed her when we were little.
This kind of thing was completely normal between us as siblings.
Seoyeon had always been impatient, so she was constantly like this.
She couldn't wait for me to eat on my own and just shoved food at me instead.
"Well? It's good, right?"
"Oh. It's actually really good."
"Right? Right? I told you it's insane."
Encouraged by my agreement, Seoyeon happily took another bite of salad.
She was cute, I had to admit. That was exactly why she was such a little devil.
I smiled fondly at the little sister beloved by the whole family, then turned my head to glance at the empty seat nearby.
…Seorin was running a bit late today.
She usually arrived around this time. The fact that she wasn't here yet meant something must have come up for her too.
While I was looking that way for a moment, a challenge came flying in from beside me.
"Oppa."
"Yeah?"
"What are you staring at so hard? That seat?"
"Huh? Ah. Yeah."
"Don't tell me that's the crush's seat? She's not here right now? Hasn't shown up yet?"
"I don't know."
"Too bad. I wanted to see her face. What does she look like for Oppa to fall for her? Or is it a one-sided crush? Like you just sit here staring at her all the time?"
"What are you talking about. It's not a one-sided crush."
Ah. The word "one-sided" had needled me, and I'd spilled the truth without thinking.
Seoyeon's face lit up with an I knew it smile.
"Ohhh~ So something's actually going on between you two? How far have you two gone?"
"We've, uh… eaten together, at least?"
Actually, just last night the two of us had even held a little screening at Seorin's place.
But telling Seoyeon that felt too embarrassing, so I held it back.
"Kyaa~ For real? Oh my god, oh my god. How did you two get close? Who talked to who first?"
She excitedly whacked my arm over and over, completely worked up.
Why was she more excited about the romance than the person actually dating?
I stared at her, half-exasperated, then slowly turned my head.
What was that?
…It felt like someone was looking at me from somewhere.
Instinctively following the sensation, I looked toward the stairs. No one was there.
"What? Is someone there?"
"Huh? No. I just felt like someone was watching me. Must've been my imagination."
…It was just my imagination, right?