In Search of the Perfect Woman
"Ugh…."
"Wow… what am I even looking at right now."
It's my body. What else would it be?
"I'm telling you, a real woman would fall for this. Just trust me — this is possible."
The price of the lingerie ended up being settled by simply putting it on and showing her. I'd meant to buy it with my own money, but… well. At thirty thousand won… wasn't a little peek fair enough?
I'd drawn a hard line against photos, so Unnie was staring at me with her eyes wide open, looking me up and down in a way that bordered on outright teasing.
"Ahem. It was delicious…."
"Ugh. Get out already. I need to change."
Unnie slipped away like a spider, gliding out of sight. I sighed, locked the door, and peeled off the lingerie.
"Hoo…."
Looking at it again, it really was racy. A little disappointing that the first person to see it wasn't Oppa, but still….
He's the one who'll get to enjoy it, right?
I was genuinely looking forward to his reaction.
"We can go now."
"Already?"
"Ugh, we said we were only buying lingerie."
"Ahem… that may be so, however…."
Unnie slipped into a historical-drama accent and stroked the empty air beneath her neat chin as if she had a long beard there.
She gazed up at the sky, hands clasped behind her back, and clicked her tongue — as though she were fretting over something as vast as a mountain.
"Well… I suppose I could grab a meal with you, at least."
"Yes!"
Just like that, she was back to her bright, bubbly self. She was exactly like Jihyeok Oppa. Honestly, it was cute.
Is there any way I could learn that kind of cute behavior?
Maybe I have to become a woman down to my bones before those mismatched habits finally disappear.
Every so often I still catch myself sitting with my legs sprawled to the side, or kneeling the wrong way — and then I put on a skirt and end up spreading my legs or sitting like Dad, and I startle myself.
"You're cute."
"Huh?"
"I said you're cute."
"O-out of nowhere??"
Curious, I hugged her. Maybe that fresh, sweet scent of hers was the secret.
"Hee…."
"Why are you so cute? Tell me."
"Heh… I don't… really…."
She even switched to formal speech, which only made her lethally adorable. Carefully, I tucked a strand of her loose hair behind her ear.
"Hnn…."
"There's got to be a secret, right? Isn't there?"
Slowly, our faces drew closer.
— Tuk.
Unnie's narrowing eyes flew wide open, and she shoved me away.
"…W-w-wait a second! I-I have your Oppa…!"
"Oh my. I was just doing it because you're cute."
"Hoo… hoo… haah… I almost actually fell for that…."
She and Suhyeon Unnie have such similar faces and are about the same height — so why is Sua Unnie the cute one?
I decided to think about it a little more broadly.
Sua Unnie was Suhyeon Unnie's younger sister.
Both of them were full of aegyo, but given all the worldly grit that came with her job, Suhyeon Unnie carried a subtle maturity. Sua Unnie, as the younger sister, was practically built for aegyo. And when she turned it on, cars appeared… houses appeared….
"Mm-hmm."
"Why… could you not come any closer for a second? My heart is racing…."
"Will you teach me aegyo?"
"…What?"
"Aegyo."
Suhyeon Unnie could probably do it if she tried, but Sua Unnie's skill level was clearly higher.
I didn't have a little sister of my own, so I couldn't say for sure — but younger sisters got love from their parents, and depending on the age gap, from their older brothers and sisters too.
"Ahem… well, you see…."
"…Hold on a second."
I grabbed Unnie and hurried us out of the department store.
"Why, why? What's going on…?"
"People…."
"People…?"
"Were staring so hard… aah…!"
I'd suddenly hugged her in the middle of a department store like I was under a spell. Of course people were going to look at us strangely.
"Ahem. Forget the aegyo lessons. You're cute enough already."
"Ugh… can we just go home already…."
I must have short-circuited for a second there.
"Well… yeah. You can just go to your boyfriend like that. Earlier was… for tonight…."
"Y-yep…."
We pushed through air so thick it felt hard to breathe and finally made it into the car.
"Ahem. Sooo… would it be okay if we stopped by a pharmacy and the supermarket?"
"Ah. Sure. I was going to do some shopping anyway. But a pharmacy…?"
Ah. Should I tell her? If I do… she'll probably put it to good use too.
"Well… zinc supplements make a guy's… that fluid… a lot more…."
"Pfft…! Got it. Let's go. I'll feed some to Jihyeok too."
"Th-thank you…."
I'd handed over the embarrassment and gained a better mood in return.
We made a quick stop at the pharmacy for the supplements, then headed to the supermarket.
"Hmm~ What's Jihye making today?"
"I think it'll be tonkatsu today."
"Wait… homemade?"
"Yep. Oppa loves tonkatsu so much."
"Oh… you're a real wife."
"Hehe."
I'd just been praised by Oppa's wife. Getting complimented by a housewife… for me, that was as good as the highest honor.
"Maybe I should try making tonkatsu too…."
"Oppa likes Korean food. Especially the unusual stuff."
"Unusual stuff…?"
"Like seasoned fernbrake, or pollack roe… mm. Unusual for someone his age, I mean. I eat it too, but Oppa actually seeks it out."
"Oh… I knew he liked Korean food, but I didn't know about the salted seafood. Thanks."
Does an unusual person just like unusual things?
"What about you, Unnie? What do you like?"
"Hmm… seafood? Stuff like hongeo!"
Yeah. Definitely unusual.
I absolutely cannot eat fermented skate. That stuff is just… something. An indescribable kind of taste.
"Dipping or drowning — one, two, three!"
"Huh? Uh… dipping?"
Even flustered, she clearly said dipping.
"……"
My affection for Unnie went up a notch. Next time I made sweet-and-sour pork, I definitely had to invite her.
"I'm really glad I ended up not disliking you, Unnie."
"Huh!? Did I just almost get hated by Jihye?"
"All right~ Shall we head home now?"
"Jihye?!"
I flashed her a playful smile and got in the car.
"Earlier was just a joke… I'll invite you over sometime. We should all have a meal together as a family."
"Yes!! I'll be waiting for your call!"
— Vroom!
"…Ahem."
"Ah."
All the way home, I patiently walked Unnie through the absolute basics of safe driving, step by careful step. And I made sure to mention that driving like that burned through twice as much gas.
"Thanks for today~"
"Yeah… let's hang out again sometime…."
— Woooom….
"Hoo…."
— Pad, pad.
It was still too early for the day to be fading. Since I'd headed out a little early that morning, it was still bright and clear.
It was chilly, but we were starting to leave winter behind — enough that I could manage in clothes chosen more for looks than warmth.
"La la la~"
No matter what I do, I really am a homebody, aren't I. Home is the best.
I left the lights on only in the kitchen.
For this stretch of time, I almost felt like the star of some cooking show filmed right here in my kitchen — this hour belonged entirely to me. And beyond it was Oppa.
Oppa, who would taste the food and break into a bright smile. Who would forget how tired he was and just eat. Who would tell me it was delicious.
"Hoo."
A kitchen had to be clean, and so did the person cooking in it.
I changed clothes, came back out, tied on my apron, and started pulling out ingredients — prepping, washing, taking out the meat.
In silence, the cooking prep came together.
"That's done…."
That… was me talking to myself.
— Thump thump thump thump
I patted the meat destined to become tonkatsu with a meat mallet. The thick cuts, pounded out to the proper width and thickness for a proper cutlet, were transferred to a plate.
Fresh. For the sake of freshness, it was far better that I — who had nothing but time — went out and bought the meat myself instead of freezing it in the fridge.
I seasoned the meat, dredged it in flour, dipped it in beaten egg, and coated it in breadcrumbs.
The oil looked fine. If you tried to stretch it by reusing it over and over, it would steal the flavor right out of the tonkatsu — so you always had to check.
— Bzzzt-bzzzzt!
I gave the texts a casual check and sent an emoticon back.
Eating it piping hot was the most important part. That was why I always stressed that he had to text me first.
Oppa knew the true taste of tonkatsu, so I was grateful he always kept that promise without fail.
— At the ssshhh of the oil, I gently lowered in the rest of the cutlets.
I watched them carefully and fished them out at the right moment. The biggest downside of tonkatsu… was that cleaning up afterward was genuinely annoying.
Looking at a sink and stovetop slick with grease could get a little irritating. Still, these days I had all kinds of little tricks, and it almost felt like a proper cleaning session — so once it was done, I even felt a strange sense of satisfaction.
The easiest method was simply laying down newspaper around the cooking area.
— Chop chop chop chop
Cabbage to go with the tonkatsu was sliced up into a salad. I drizzled on the dressing and pulled out the sauce I'd made ahead of time.
The tonkatsu should be hot, but honestly… isn't the sauce better cold?
"Oppa! Welcome home!"
"Hey~!"
I was still setting the table when the door lock beeped and the door opened.
Anyway — today, everything had been perfect.
"Whoa… the tonkatsu is still steaming…."
"I told you I time it for exactly when you get home."
I hung up my apron neatly and roughly tidied the rest.
"I see it every time, but you're really something."
As always, Oppa started to sit, then went "Ah," set down the spoon he'd picked up, and stood again.
"Ahem. I have good news."
"Oh… don't tell me…."
"I got next week off. Therefore…"
"Wow!!"
Something I'd only been hoping for had actually come true, and before I knew it I was throwing my arms around Oppa and bouncing up and down. He looked startled, but he bounced right along with me.
"Ahem… sorry."
"Nah, it's fine. I'm super excited too."
After all that bouncing, a faintly awkward atmosphere settled in, and I felt a little out of place.
"Then… hold me…."
"…I've got something even better."
Our bodies were still pressed together, and Oppa's face slowly drew closer.
"Chuu…."
Like lovers who hadn't seen each other in a whole week, the kiss went on and on.
"Sh-shall we eat…?"
"Yeah. Let's eat."
I hated how violently my heart was pounding. I could have kept going a little longer.
I hated myself for forgetting how to breathe and holding my breath without meaning to.