Chapter 112
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Translator: penny
Chapter: 112
Chapter Title: Catching Two Rabbits at Once (1)
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The letter was surprisingly straightforward.
About the curse that had befallen the Hero herself, and why she had no choice but to leave them.
It was nothing more than a dry recounting of the full story I'd heard from her.
"...Ariel."
"Ahh, how hard it must have been for her."
But her former comrades, clutching the letter,
Minerva and Lumine couldn't hold back their tears.
And it made sense—the handwriting grew blurrier with tears toward the end.
More so when apologizing to them than when confessing her own pain.
The Hero had been even sadder then.
They weren't the type to miss that sentiment.
"...This idiot, did she really think we'd believe her just because she said 'I'm fine' after all this?"
"So very much like the Hero. Has she not changed at all, or has she changed completely?"
The Hero's party duo wiped away their tears.
Then they carefully folded the letter and tucked it into their bosoms.
Treasuring it dearly.
Soon, their teary eyes turned to me.
"Whew... First off, thank you, Hyun."
"Ah, it was nothing."
"Right. But hey, come here."
"Huh? What... Waaah!!?"
Thud.
Minerva grabbed my balls tight.
She didn't squeeze hard enough to hurt,
but I yelped in shock anyway.
"Wh-what are you..."
"You were with our Hero just now, weren't you! No wonder that old man was blatantly lying!"
"...Ah."
Come to think of it, she'd have noticed.
Neither I nor the Hero counted, but a normal person like the innkeeper? No exception.
She'd have detected the lie with her Blessing.
"I played along when you suddenly brought up the Hero, figuring it was some improv! But if this was the situation, you shouldn't have!!!"
"Let go of my balls first!"
"We were suffering because we might see her!! You can't just drag us into it!!"
Minerva scolded me sharply like that.
Her hand firm on my balls, eyes glaring.
She seemed genuinely pissed.
Lumine was the one who calmed the chaos.
"That's enough, Lady Minerva."
"Lumi! But this guy."
"Lord Yi Hyun wouldn't have done it on purpose. Surely he thought it would help."
"...Still."
Her momentum deflated a bit.
Minerva pouted and let go.
I breathed a sigh of relief.
"Phew... I'm saved..."
"I didn't even squeeze. Don't be such a baby. Anyway, explain yourself."
"Explain? Isn't it all in the letter?"
"That's from Ariel's perspective, and she insists she's a man, so I'm not sure. I need your take, since you saw her yourself."
"Got it. The first time we met..."
I explained step by step.
Tracking her down and making contact.
The contradictions galore, contrary to her claims.
And finally, the brand that appeared on her cheek.
Minerva and Lumine both furrowed their brows.
"So Lord Yi Hyun is convinced Lady Ariel is a woman."
"If she used to be a guy, then she's just a female who got born wrong. Shax just fixed her gender."
"You use some weird words sometimes. Anyway, I agree. No way that curse could affect even the statue."
We all said the same thing.
Shax's curse after the looting.
No way it was as powerful as she claimed.
It had to be the Hero's delusion alone.
"To begin with, altering all our perceptions? Only an omnipotent goddess could pull that off."
"......"
'As a modder, that kinda stings.'
It hit me anew how insane my mods were, but anyway.
She was just deluded; the Hero was a woman.
No one objected to my claim.
I puffed up with pride.
"Oh, right—this curse, I'm the one lifting it personally."
"For real, Hyun!?"
"Already undone about 2 percent. Can't snap it away like with you, Lady Lumine, but with enough time, it'll be a breeze."
There, that was the majesty of a curse expert.
Now for the praise and applause.
I struck a triumphant pose.
What came back was a lukewarm reaction.
"Progress on curse treatment means you did... those lewd things to her too♡ Mmph♡"
"Oh yeah. Treating her curse required naughty stuff, right? How'd you even do it to someone who thinks she's a dude? No way you went gay?"
"......"
Don't look at me like that, Minerva.
This expert is deeply wounded.
"Nothing like that. Precisely..."
I explained quickly.
Not gay—this was normal sex.
The suspicious glares eased up.
"Stimulating gender dysphoria intensely to weaken the curse's hold..."
"Sounds plausible in theory. Similar to what happened with Lumi."
"See? Told you, expert."
"Then Lord Yi Hyun, does this mean the Hero's treatment..."
"Just needs time."
Soon the topic shifted back to the Hero.
Smiles spread on their lips.
They seemed thrilled about the treatment news.
"Ahh, thanks to you, Lord Yi Hyun! And thanks to the goddess who sent you to us!"
Lumine even started praying.
A holy aura filled the air.
'...Makes me wanna nitpick so bad.'
That goddess didn't deserve thanks.
She smacked me unconscious for not upping my Intelligence—straight-up evil god vibes.
'But saying that would get my cheek slapped.'
I swallowed the complaint.
No desire to blaspheme and pass out again.
'I'll stick to my pure big sis only. Pure-ment.'>
Instead, I clasped my hands in prayer.
Lumine tilted her head curiously.
Looked awkward—not her usual prayer pose.
"Ah, I changed up my praying stance lately. Felt that one was a bit irreverent."
Switching faiths...
Yeah, keep that secret.
Telling a devout saint would get me slapped.
And above all,
this wasn't the time for that talk.
"Anyway, there's one big issue here."
Clap clap.
I clapped to draw attention.
Their eyes focused on me.
"Issue? What?"
"I said it just needs time, right?"
"You did... Wait, don't tell me?"
"Yeah. I don't have time. Her Majesty in the capital is hounding me to return."
Easy to forget, but I was imperial staff.
Couldn't ignore Luna's summons.
"One week to return. No, four days left."
Luna had even issued an imperial decree: return after a week.
Just four days remained.
Treat the Hero in that time?
Even I couldn't manage that.
Unlike Lumine, whose constitution countered the curse perfectly, this one was tricky in every way.
I shook my head.
"Can't we report to Her Majesty and delay? If Lord Yi Hyun explains..."
"Doubt it. I barely talked her out of ordering me back this morning."
"That selfish bitch. Not content with locking me and Lumi up for three years, can't even wait a bit?"
"Hey, that's lese-majeste."
"No one's around but us, so it's fine."
The mood soured instantly.
Luna's reputation hit rock bottom.
Minerva aside, Lumine had real reason to curse her, so it stung more.
'Still feels off hearing my maybe-pregnant girl get trashed.'
I got it, but couldn't just sit there.
I waved it off quick.
Time to shield her.
"Come on. Thanks to her, Lady Lumine cleared the sacred barrier, and I took down Eisen—no, Varlam."
"...True."
"Demons never even neared the capital while I was there."
"And Her Majesty? She's better than you'd think. Sending a guy like me here wasn't easy."
"Fair, but sigh."
The mood softened a touch.
No—more like they started minding their manners.
Realizing they'd badmouthed their future mother-in-law in front of the heir.
I reached out and patted their heads.
"It's fine. I get where you're coming from."
"...Thank you. I lost my composure there."
"Sorry too."
"I said it's fine. Anyway, back to the Hero."
I cleared my throat.
Now for the main point.
"Treating the Hero full-time? Tough. You get that, right?"
"Yeah."
"And once I leave EisenGarth, I probably won't come back."
Me leaving meant it was over.
I'd never set foot here again.
"Can't Lord Yi Hyun persuade her?"
"Hard to explain, but there's stuff."
Especially if Luna was really pregnant?
Admitting that would spark scandal.
No leaving the capital after that.
Abandoning a pregnant empress? Trash tier.
'Teleport stones are tapped out too.'
Couldn't pop in and out like the front lines.
Transfer magic guzzles stones.
Especially with Luna sending priests en masse for my treatment.
'And most importantly.'
"Her Majesty knows I nearly died from severe wounds. Think she'd send me out again?"
The key point.
Publicly, I was a guy who'd cheated death.
Minerva sighed, getting it.
"...Got it. If you leave, you might never return."
"I'd feel the same—wouldn't want to send Lord Yi Hyun into danger."
"Exactly."
Basics covered.
One thing left.
"So, I'm asking for your cooperation."
"Cooperation?"
"——Have the Hero move to the capital with us."
The biggest problem: the Hero.
Bring her to the capital.
"Right, just tell Ariel to come with you? She can ride separately."
"Yeah, we just avoid looking at her."
"What was I worried for~ No big deal! Why the heavy mood then?"
They finally spotted the hole in my logic.
But by now, it didn't matter.
Honestly, it was all buildup for atmosphere.
'Wanted to slide it in slyly, but Minerva saw through it.'
Why the long buildup?
Simple.
"So let's do a real intense 3P right in front of the Hero."
"...What?"
"It'll be super effective for treatment."
Second extreme prescription.
Phase 2 of Operation: Bang the Hero.
Catching two rabbits at once.
A day passed, and night fell again.
"Where the hell did you get this pervert outfit?"
"Ways to get it exist."
'Blanc's got dozens in her closet.'
Minerva, in the outfit I'd brought,
"Mmph♡ Th-this outfit...♡ No good♡"
and Lumine, groaning at her mirror image in the same getup.
Night with the two had arrived.
The difference from usual?
-Rustle.
"...Heh."
'Getting ideas?'
The Hero peeping from the ceiling.
She didn't know, but we all did.
'Hero, watch closely from there! And don't tell a soul!!'
"Not endless... Anyway, let's begin."
Tonight's goal: lift the Hero's curse to 10 percent.