Do You Know How Babies Are Made? I Can Teach You (2)

War of the Forest was a strategy game from Tentendo set in a fantasy world, where players chose a race, raised descendants, and waged war.

Its detailed and varied activities had earned it the occasional nickname of "life simulator" among players.

"I recommend starting with orcs! If you play an orc, Mr. Baekseolgi, I can make an elf character and flood the early game with sheer numbers!"

"I don't like that. Even in games, I tend to role-play with full immersion."

I completely ignored Yujacha's advice and created the dashing hero character I'd always imagined.

"I'm going for a love marriage, no exceptions."

After all, I believed the act of making children should only come after a sweet, fluttering romance, mutual confessions of love, a kiss, and a wedding ceremony.

"Aww, I was hoping to role-play ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠an elf getting conquered by an orc… I even sent you a Tentendo 2 and everything. I didn't expect this."

I couldn't let my first Tentendo game experience be ruined like this. Though I was a little surprised she'd managed to get her hands on such a hard-to-find new console.

"Ah, no, it's not like that! I just… don't have any friends, and I've never played a Tentendo game with anyone before!"

"Still, please don't do this again. Receiving something this expensive out of nowhere only makes me feel burdened or like I'm being taken advantage of."

I gently scolded Yujacha. The package she'd sent contained not only the expensive console but a full set of accessories as well.

If someone with bad intentions approached her pretending to be a friend and asked for expensive gifts or difficult favors, she'd probably agree without question.

"You can take advantage of me however you like, Mr. Baekseolgi."

"Even if you say that, I'm still not playing an orc. No matter how much it's just a game, how could I do anything perverted to you, Yujacha?"

Of course, Yujacha's serious attitude toward the Tentendo game wasn't an act or role-play. She had an unexpected charm—she enjoyed cute and whimsical things just as much as lewd and suggestive ones.

"It's been my dream since I was little… Ever since I played the previous War of the Forest, I've wanted to role-play an elf getting ravished by an orc, just like in those dirty comics."

Was this sincere, or was it RP?

With her unique and bold persona as the Succubus Saintess, she often made provocative remarks and gestures toward viewers even during regular streams.

"Really not? An orc with your face would be so fun to get conquered by!"

"Does my photo really look that ugly?"

"Hmm, I wouldn't say ugly. More on the cute side, actually."

"…Are you going to keep saying things that cause misunderstandings?"

"Hehe, I don't mind being misunderstood at all. It's cute how you read so much meaning into every little thing I say."

I tried to tell her, in a roundabout way, to stop giving me such personal compliments, but she paid no attention and kept teasing me while humming to herself.

"Mr. Baekseolgi, you've never had a girlfriend, have you?"

"…I have."

"Liar. Your voice completely changed."

Could a broadcaster really tell the difference? My lie, told to avoid getting swept up in Yujacha's pace, was exposed in an instant.

"That photo you sent me—you took it yourself with an awkward expression, right? That angle puts you backlit, so it doesn't come out pretty."

"……."

"And since it wasn't taken by someone else, and you clearly don't even know the basics of taking photos… I figured you've never had a girlfriend."

Seeing the usually clumsy and carefree Yujacha suddenly notice such minute details made me think that women's intuition really did exist.

"No, I haven't. Did you really want to hear that confirmation from me?"

"Yep. Succubi love virgins. The purer the man, the more delicious his energy…♡"

Yujacha's virtual character licked her lips and made her eyes glow pink. The noble and devout saintess setting had long since been pushed aside.

"Or should I play a female orc instead? Even if you pick a human and raise a hero, I can just assault you."

"Is your head filled with nothing but lewd and suggestive thoughts? I was really looking forward to our first collab because you suggested it."

Disliking how the conversation kept escalating, I lowered my voice and spoke firmly to Yujacha.

No matter how much this was just RP—playing a pure saintess on the outside while acting like a lustful succubus on the inside—there had to be a line.

"Sorry. Now that I think about it, this is your first Tentendo game… I felt guilty about carrying you last time, so I wanted to make up for it."

"As long as you understand. I'm sorry for speaking so harshly as well."

After seeing her words and actions, I finally understood why she'd suddenly started joking around so excessively.

She'd been carried to victory in Grand Arts Hero, so this time she probably wanted to be the one carrying me.

The Yujacha I knew was someone who made dirty jokes, but she was also kinder and more pure-hearted than anyone.

"It's fine. Actually, I'm glad this happened. Now I know you're a man too. When you lowered your voice, you sounded like a completely different person…♡"

Cancel that. I take back what I just thought.

"It felt like you were going to pin me down and breed me over and over. Ah, this is still about the game, of course."

To end this underground talk, I decided we needed to pick our races and start ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠the war as soon as possible. Just then, something caught my eye.

"…How about the Inrang race? It's a multiplayer-only race with great base stats, so you'd be strong from the start. I think you'd like it, Yujacha."

A beastkin race with wolf ears and tails. Their stats would explode once they found a beloved partner by raising affection.

Since it was marked as multiplayer-only, it seemed like the two of us would have to act as a pair for balance reasons.

"Are you sure? The Inrang race is definitely strong early on, but the fated partner system only creates one per faction at random. If we can't find it before the game ends, our late-game value might suffer…"

When I selected the Inrang race, a notification appeared on the game screen, waiting for Yujacha's confirmation.

"Yujacha, what did I say games are for?"

"…You said you play them for fun."

"This is our first game together, after all. And if it's with you, I don't mind losing. Want to give it a try?"

Part of the fun of games was charging in without knowing anything and figuring it out as you went.

Of course, if a game was difficult or had no guides, an experienced player's help was essential—but still.

"When you're playing with a friend, winning and losing isn't what matters."

"…Okay, I understand."

Yujacha accepted my suggestion in a soft, gentle voice, and I felt her compulsive habit of always trying to carry others—developed from playing alone—ease just a little.

Once I became a big corporate streamer, I'd inevitably have to collab with other broadcasters, so it was better to address these habits early.

With that, Yujacha and I began the game together, standing on a cliff overlooking a vast natural landscape.

"Huh? Mr. Baekseolgi, can you check what it says in your status window?"

"It says I've already found my fated partner. The other person is 'citrus_yuja'… Don't tell me."

A strange buff window and description hovered between us. It indicated that we had already found the fated partner that was randomly generated only once per game.

"Yeah, it looks like I'm set as your fated partner. With this, we can dominate both the early rush and the late-game high points!"

We'd beaten odds of roughly 1 in 10,000—similar to getting struck by lightning.

"I never thought the situation from that 'Top 10 Luckiest Gamers in the World' video would happen to me!"

Yujacha added that the fated partner system was random in timing as well, so it might not appear until the very end of the game—or not at all.

"Looks like we'll have no choice but to become the Adam and Eve of this world and multiply our children, huh?"

"Huh? What do you mean by that…?"

"Inrang can't feel love with anyone except their fated partner, so they can't have children with other characters."

There was a restriction like that?

I'd liked the description when choosing the race—it said that once you found your fated partner, you'd share deep love and live together for a hundred years.

"That's why they're strong early but weak late! If you don't find your fated partner, you waste a ton of time. And even though it's multiplayer-only, if you're not partners, you can't cooperate well either!"

While my mind was frozen, Yujacha's already-customized 2D character was dragging me toward a dark cave.

"Wait, what button do I press to get out of this grab?!"

"You don't need to know that. Once we have children, I'll stay home and handle building and farming, so you can focus on combat, Mr. Baekseolgi!"

And so, after some time passed…

Amid a flurry of heart-shaped speech bubbles, a virtual child was born between Yujacha and me.

"Look, this adorable baby is ours! Now let's go conquer the surrounding races!"

"…What was the goal of this game again?"

"Unify the continent and be the first to defeat the ancient demon that causes all the wars. Come on, let's make even more children!"

When I'd watched other YouTubers or streamers play, I'd thought it was a realistic medieval fantasy life sim like Stardew Valley or something similar.

"We're going to fill this War of the Forest world with nothing but our children…!"

Whenever I was with Yujacha, things always seemed to flow in this strange, suggestive direction, as if pulled by fate.

"Listen up, kids! Your big bro here just won the lottery for the brand-new Tentendo 2 pre-order!"

At that very moment, Cha Seungwoo—who was streaming on the same platform, Sepia—was also playing War of the Forest.

Originally a trilogy, War of the Forest had started with Demon's Forest on handheld devices and continued all the way to the latest Tentendo 2.

"So, the game we're playing today is~ obviously the new release, War of the Forest! It's exclusive to the Tentendo 2, so you can't play it on anything else, right?"

While bragging about winning the Tentendo 2 pre-order lottery, Cha Seungwoo felt something odd as he read the chat.

"What are you talking about? What neighbor?"

Only then did he realize that "neighbor" referred to VTuber Yujacha and editor Kim Baekhyun.

"Oh, so things are going well between them? They looked really sweet when they streamed together last time."

"You guys don't get it. No matter how few friends you have, does it make sense to gift someone a Tentendo 2? And it wasn't a million won—it started at 500,000 won!"

As Cha Seungwoo said, the Tentendo 2 ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠was an expensive 600,000-won device, and even then, you had to pay a premium if you missed the pre-order window.

No matter how he looked at it, this didn't feel like ordinary goodwill.

"Alright, time for some sniping. I need to get revenge for that 1v1 we never got to do."

With a good idea in mind, Cha Seungwoo smirked and launched War of the Forest, immediately entering the race selection screen and picking a character without hesitation.

The Yeti—his trademark from his pro days. As he selected the Sasquatch race it belonged to, he spoke with confidence.

However, Cha Seungwoo's confident attitude didn't last even ten minutes into the game.

"Huh? What are these people? They're Inrang and they already have kids at this timing…?! This is ridiculous!!"

Yujacha and Baekhyun, who had multiplied their descendants faster than anyone else in the game, were attacking his main base.