Desperate Embrace

"Kaya. You're clinging so tight it's hard to walk."

"I'm sorry."

"No, I don't mean you need to apologize. Just give me a little space. If you're stuck to me like this, ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠it'll be tough to respond in an emergency."

"I'm sorry."

Buying essentials after scraping together every last coin had given us some leeway with rations, allowing minimal recovery. Calming my half-panicked comrades and escaping 1-6 had been a success too.

But once the most urgent issue was handled, my comrades' mental states hit me like a brick.

Shae was barely holding onto her reason, but Kaya was the real problem. She flat-out refused to leave my side!

"Kaya. What's wrong with you."

"I'm sorry."

No matter what I said, her response was always the same: I'm sorry. And no matter what, she stayed glued to me.

This won't do...

Four rooms left until the boss. We couldn't afford to dawdle outside a rest area.

So, I had to talk while walking.

"I'm really fine, okay? Shae was back to normal the next day. Right?"

"Pardon? Yes! Of course!"

Shae jumped in with quick agreement at my glance. But Kaya stayed silent.

"Shae was out of it until we left the dungeon. But look at me—I snapped out of it before the fight even ended. Proof I'm okay, right?"

"Exactly. Leader's got this."

Still, Kaya didn't budge.

"Come on, you'd think you were the one who barely survived... Hey, tell me. Why are you like this? I'm seriously fine."

"... "

"What?"

"It was... me."

Kaya finally spoke. Her voice was so soft I stopped walking without thinking. As my footsteps echoed into silence, I barely caught her words.

"Last time... it happened too. Because of my mistake, we faced great danger. I was helplessly swept into nightmares and disgraced myself in front of Leader. Without you, I might have gone mad or given up being a hero."

"Kaya."

Was she talking about the 1-2 fight from my first run? The one where I missed by 1 damage? She couldn't know that—it was only visible to me. Was it instinct, or overwhelming guilt?

"And this time too. It ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠was my fault. Because of me, Leader nearly died."

"Not your fault. You've been doing amazing."

"If I stay this close, doesn't it raise the odds I'll block attacks aimed at Leader? More than anything I do offensively, protecting you from threats seems like the biggest help."

We were talking, but it wasn't a conversation. Kaya wasn't hearing me—she was just repeating herself.

Her mentality was at –74...

She follows me well, but has it gone overboard?

I checked the relationship chart, but no changes.

Is it because Kaya's at 4 and Shae's at 2? Seriously?

I dismissed it. I referenced it, but didn't blindly trust numbers. Even at the same level, Kaya and Shae were different people—race, background, age, personality, tastes. How could you boil that down to digits?

Maybe dependency or obsession.

Hard. Damn hard. Slaying monsters was life-or-death, and now I had to babysit mental states too. Things seemed fine one moment, then shattered the next. Like when I took that near-fatal hit—the good vibes and mentality collapsed instantly.

"Kaya."

"I'm sorry."

"Kaya. Open your ears and listen."

"I'm sorry."

"Kaya!"

I got it. Failing to land that attack and nearly getting me killed? That could scar her. But.

She couldn't break now. Despair spreads. And we were mid-dungeon. Different rules applied.

Sometimes, a stopgap was necessary. Like now.

"Shae, look away for a sec."

"Pardon? Oh, yes!"

I turned Shae's head with a hint of apology, then pulled Kaya—who was practically fused to me—into a hug. Her battle nun's heavy armor and bloodstains were rough, but I ignored it, cradling her head to my chest.

Kaya flinched, then wrapped her arms around my waist, squeezing back hard.

Whoa. Strong grip.

Partly because I was weakened, but I didn't show it. To prove I was fine, to reassure her, I had to endure this iron embrace like it was nothing.

I gently stroked the back of her head, coaxing her to look up. I felt her hands fidget at my waist.

She's responding. Interaction works.

Patiently stroking, Kaya lifted her head, meeting my eyes. Her gray irises swam with deep guilt and sorrow.

"Kaya."

"I'm sor—"

"One more blind I'm sorry unrelated to what we're saying, and I won't talk to you anymore."

"...!"

Her eyes widened double. She bit her lip. I could see the war in her head: My fault is grave, so apologize vs. Leader said it this strongly, obey.

"No more hugs, no head pats, no ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠sleeping together. No deep talks. I'll treat you like just another hero squad grunt."

"That's... mmph!"

Her lips tasted of faint blood and dry rations. Not great, but she was tasting the same on mine, so fair trade. I relentlessly teased her lips and tongue.

The thrill of intimacy in a dungeon—unthinkable before. Regret for not tending her mind any other way. Guilt toward sidelined Shae. I poured it all into ravaging her mouth.

I'm fine. Listen. Focus on me. Don't despair alone. Don't play meat shield solo. Follow me. Want more kisses, more hugs? Obey like before. I won't die. I want to live. So stop acting like you'd drop dead without me. I'm your leader. The one you acknowledged. That's an order. No solo breakdowns.

I kept my eyes open. Eyes say a lot—I poured my message into mine. Maybe that's why my gaze burned so fierce; Kaya opened her half-lidded eyes and held mine.

The brutal kiss—feeling like over a minute—ended. I forced myself away. Her lips and tongue clung desperately, but my face was already distant. I ignored the clanking of a third party's armor.

"Let's go."

"...Yes, Leader."

Kaya stared a moment, then meekly followed Shae, whose neck was flushed red.

First aid: success.

But it's just first aid, that's the issue.

Still dangerous. I stopped the kiss because of the mentality drop message. Couldn't yell at the dungeon for bad timing. We were in the dungeon, hence these drastic measures.

Kaya's psyche was more tangled now, and Shae was a ticking bomb too—untriggered, but fragile.

If I hit agony again here?

Real madness from Kaya and Shae.

In long terror runs, heroes who broke –100 needed up to 10 minutes and cash to recover, based on level, class, traits. Methods varied.

No. Can't go mad in Zone 1.

Game recovered clean, but here? 3k hours said no. Like overstretched rubber band going slack—once mad, easier next time.

"Urk!"

"Shae!"

"Kaya. Bandages."

"Here."

"Shae, hang on."

"Hng... "

Bleeding stopped with bandages. HP loss was just 1.

But mentality had crumbled past –80. Without recovery events or consistent crits in fights ahead...

No. Don't even think it—words become seeds.

A fork appeared. No time to ponder—I picked right.

Checking mentality constantly ramped my anxiety. Anxious steps quickened.

Even after Shae's trap, my visible tension silently urged them on. Footsteps echoed anxiously—then abruptly stopped.

Lead Shae halted suddenly. Kaya stopped too, forcing me to.

Damn, what? Why stop? No need to ask.

"We should go back."

"Yeah. Sigh. Let's."

Dead end. Hidden rooms possible in dead ends, but no rogue class, low levels—no chance. Shook it off quick, turned back.

Damn it.

Decline accelerated. Clear retreat penalty. Backtracking any path sped mentality drain—representing physical/mental fatigue.

Real-time plummet toward doom. Beyond fatigue—this could mean terror devouring us in the hall. No luxury waiting for recovery items/events after one dead end.

Trap risk? Ignore it.

Judgment: drastic measures again. Options narrowed in crisis.

"Shae, Kaya."

"...Yes, Leader."

Shae a beat slow, Kaya a faint nod. Two time bombs, unpredictable...

"From now till next room, we run. No breaks."

"...Pardon?"

"What're you waiting for? Run!"

Reach 1-7 before they blow? The suffocating, limb-shaking death race began.