Chapter 63
Chapter 63
Choi Na-kyung slowly opened her eyes.
The reminiscence had been long.
And the time long passed.
Loving someone in secret while they fall for another is heart-wrenching. In truth, there were so many reasons the two of them could never have ended up together.
She had likely never even considered that she could love a woman. Her family stood at heights far too lofty for Choi Na-kyung to reach, and that family wanting their daughter to marry into a household they approved of was surely one of the reasons too.
Then, by chance, during an unwanted arranged meeting, she fell for her match. And the feeling was mutual. Even though it was clearly a meeting neither had wanted, they loved each other.
But all of that was just an excuse.
The reason Choi Na-kyung could not become the most important person to her was simply that she lacked the courage to take one more step.
When they first met, not being the one to speak first. Waiting for her to speak to her instead.
Not being able to tell her "I love you" first.
Too terrified of growing distant to step closer, just watching over her from a few steps away.
Maybe she could have taken her hand and run far, far away.
She could have stayed right by her side, shielding her from all the harsh things whenever she suffered.
If she could not even do that, then maybe she could have at least tried speaking to her first.
But in the end, Choi Na-kyung had failed at every single one of those things.
Which was why even that short remaining time with her had slipped away so helplessly.
She had vowed not to let things pass that way again.
The fact that she called her "Chairwoman" might have actually meant that Sara had already started slipping from her embrace.
"Ha."
It was laughable that a single remark from her could dredge up the past and make her feel superior.
She had woven such a tight safety net around Sara. She had built up conditions so no one could approach her recklessly, created reasons so no one would dare covet her.
The one who should have been able to tear down all those barriers was surely herself—
"......."
Choi Na-kyung turned her gaze to the side. Her mouth was still smiling, but those narrowed eyes were not smiling at all. When opened wide, they looked gentle and mild, but when fixed on someone, they sharpened like a blade.
Years ago, the public had suspected that Choi Na-kyung and the late Chairman were actually having an affair, or so the rumors went. Seeing her sharp eyes and Sara's upturned eyes, they had genuinely suspected that Sara was Choi Na-kyung's daughter.
But that was impossible.
Because Choi Na-kyung has never had a child.
Even after their marriage, their relationship was simply that of a father and a mother. The Chairman needed someone to fill the role of mother for Sara, and Choi Na-kyung simply wanted to stay close to the traces of the one woman she had loved her entire life. The two of them had never once shared a bed. After all, the Chairman and Choi Na-kyung each had only one person they loved.
"I'd like you to tell me in detail what happened."
Choi Na-kyung spoke in a soft voice.
They were sitting in the back seat of a luxury sedan. The chauffeur had not yet gotten in. Whenever she needed to have a truly necessary conversation, only she and the people she needed to hear it entered the car. As it was an expensive vehicle, there was no way for anyone outside to overhear if they kept their voices low.
Yang Hye-in flinched at Choi Na-kyung's words and, after hesitating a moment, slowly opened her mouth.
"......I believe the young lady wished for it."
"You believe."
"......Yes."
Yang Hye-in swallowed dryly. The Choi Na-kyung beside her now was far more frightening than the Choi Na-kyung she had seen when she first started working at this mansion.
If she decided to do something to her, Yang Hye-in would have no way to stop it.
How much money did it take for a person to kill another? To dispose of a body? To make the police close an investigation early and leave the case unsolved? She could not even begin to imagine how much it would cost, but no matter how much money was needed, the Chairwoman of Yujin Group could surely afford it.
"Preventing her from harboring such thoughts was supposed to be your job."
"......."
Yang Hye-in had nothing to say.
"......."
Choi Na-kyung silently regarded Yang Hye-in for a long moment. The air in the car had unmistakably frozen cold. Yang Hye-in felt it growing harder to breathe.
"Fine."
At last, Choi Na-kyung spoke.
"You are dismissed, as of this moment. Take off that uniform, pack your things, and leave the mansion. I will prohibit you from speaking to Sara any further. Yujin Group will properly provide your severance pay. You've worked hard until now."
Then, as if she had never been interested to begin with, she turned her gaze and looked out the window.
"......Understood."
Yang Hye-in barely managed to hold back the long exhale that nearly escaped her and opened the car door.
"Ah, right."
At the sudden sound of Choi Na-kyung's voice, Yang Hye-in froze, her body halfway out of the car.
"This should go without saying, but everything that has happened within this estate is confidential. You know that much, correct? Do you need more money, by any chance?"
Stiffly, she turned her head to look at Choi Na-kyung. She was still looking out the window. But somehow, Yang Hye-in had the feeling that she was staring straight at her.
"......No. I am merely grateful that you employed me all this time."
"......."
Choi Na-kyung gave no reply.
Yang Hye-in stepped out of the car. The chauffeur, who had been waiting beside it, closed the door. He got into the driver's seat at once.
Without a word, the car simply pulled away.
Yang Hye-in stood there for a moment, as if nailed to the spot.
It was all over now.
There was no longer any place for her in this mansion where she had spent nearly three years.
"......."
She watched the back of the car until it grew distant, then turned around. Her hands were folded together, her back ramrod straight. Even though she had been dismissed, she was still Sara's personal maid until she left this mansion.
*
I could barely calm down only once Choi Na-kyung had completely vanished from sight.
When Choi Na-kyung had passed by, I unconsciously raised my head and looked up at her. No, perhaps it was not me but "Ye Sa-ra" who looked up.
The emotion I felt in that moment was impatience.
I have to get up right now. If I don't see her now, who knows how much time will pass before she comes again.
Ye Sa-ra had wanted to move toward "Mother."
But I could not.
Ha-neul was right beside me. Ha-neul was sitting right beside me, looking at me.
What the two of us yearned for was completely different. Ye Sa-ra wanted Choi Na-kyung, who was now her only family left in this world. The sole "person she knew" and "person who loved her" over the long years.
I knew I could not do that. Ha-neul was sitting right beside me. I knew that if I did what Ye Sa-ra wanted, Ha-neul would be deeply hurt.
It was not just Ha-neul. Shin So-hee and Lee Su-a were here too.
The few friends who did not ignore me at school.
I could only take a deep breath after the door had quietly closed.
"Sara!"
Ha-neul caught me as I was about to collapse sideways. Maybe because I was wearing an outfit that exposed my shoulders, I could feel her warm body heat directly against me.
"Sara!"
Voices came from the sofa where Shin So-hee and Lee Su-a were, too.
Both of them rushed toward me. They quickly sat beside me, took my hand, and held my shoulders.
"Ye Sa-ra, wait. Look at me."
Shin So-hee, who was gripping my shoulders, said.
I lifted my gaze and met her eyes. My violently shaking vision slowly steadied. My mind, which had been bleached white, gradually regained its original color, bit by bit.
"What happened? What did that bastard usually do to you...?"
"I... I...."
I opened my mouth,
then shook my head.
"I don't... really know."
That was the truth. I did not know.
I did not know a thing about Ye Sa-ra.
At first, I thought I just had to push the Chairwoman away. I thought I could simply run away outside. I thought if I made connections and stopped being lonely, everything would be fine.
But would Ye Sa-ra truly want that?
Would she want to leave her one and only family, to leave "Mother"?
Yes, unquestionably, there had been hatred.
But in the end, Ye Sa-ra could not push either emotion away. Her heart of hatred and her heart of love kept clashing, until she finally chose to take both.
The choice to take her own life.
It was not simply an act of running away.
It was an act purely intended to hurt the other, out of sheer malice.
......And somehow, I ended up becoming the intruder who obstructed that act.
Did I have the right to keep preventing that action?
Did I have the right to keep interfering in that life?
My heart gave no answer. The heart that had been racing wildly and clashing directly with its own emotions was now beating very calmly. There was no way for me to know what it was thinking right now, or if Ye Sa-ra was truly still inside this body.
"Get out of this house."
Ha-neul spoke, still holding my hand.
"That person isn't normal. It would be better to run away somewhere far away."
Her tone made it sound as if she would go with me.
"......."
I thought for a moment. I slowly organized my thoughts, which were beginning to return. Should I run away? Would that really be better?
"......No."
The answer came to me right away.
Up until now, for the two months since I had entered this body, Sara's personality had never once surfaced. Maybe it was because she had truly died. The way my heart had just pounded and felt two completely contradictory emotions toward Choi Na-kyung might simply have been an instinctive response imprinted on this body.
......But that was not proof that Ye Sa-ra had completely disappeared from this body. That she had departed from this world.
This body, after all, is not mine.
Even if its original owner gave up on it.
Did I not make a promise? The day I read that suicide note.
"Going forward, too... I cannot give up."
"Sara......."
At my words, Ha-neul called my name in a pained voice.
Right. I cannot give up. If Sara is somehow still left in this body, perhaps I could even talk to her.
And the best way to find out if Sara really exists or not......
......is to meet Choi Na-kyung. The sole connection in her life.
"I absolutely cannot give up."
I said it as if making a vow to myself.