Starting Over Again
It was delicious. Quite a lot. Truly, a lot.
“....”
She had already finished it all. It was just toast she’d bought to take her medicine, but it was so delicious it brought tears to her eyes.
“Why, why does it keep...”
She had taken out life insurance to die and had endured for two years. With only a few days left, why were there so many lingering attachments? The thought that she wanted to eat this toast again, that she wanted to try it once more. The thought that while the steak had been good, this was also delicious.
“...I want to live, really.... Live, live...”
In this room where she was left alone, she sat clutching the empty toast wrapper and weeping.
Min Suyeon had changed. Little by little, very slowly, and gradually.
Monday, September 12th, was originally the day she was supposed to prepare her handover documents. Instead, she took a day off, ate toast at home, took her medicine, and fell into a deep, drowsy sleep. It had been ages since she’d slept so soundly. After waking up from that honey-like slumber, rather than thinking about handover documents, she thought, ‘I don’t want to die in a dirty house.’
Her desire to commit suicide hadn’t changed. But instead, she decided to cherish the remaining week or so she had left. Wouldn’t it be better to die comfortably? She figured that if she kept worrying about her parents and her younger brother even after death, she might return as a grudge-filled ghost, so she began to tidy up her home.
“....”
She threw out the standard trash bags immediately. Then, she went to the convenience store.
“Uh... can I have a 10... no, a 20-liter trash bag?”
“Yes. That will be 490 won.”
But since it was a house that hadn’t been cleaned, there was naturally a lot of trash.
“Excuse me, by any chance, what is the largest bag you have...”
“We have 100-liter bags.”
“Please give me one of those.”
And she stuffed everything in. So much of it. She even emptied the dirty sanitary bin in the bathroom and washed the bin with water. While she was at it, she cleaned the bathroom too. However...
“Ah, right...”
She didn’t have a brush to clean with, or anything else for that matter. So, she went straight to a large supermarket and swept up every tool she thought she’d need for cleaning.
“That will be 177,390 won.”
“Yes.”
And then she cleaned until she was drenched in sweat.
‘...He might come here again, and after I die...’
He might keep feeling disappointed if he saw her in such a dirty state. She had already chosen him as the person to make her feel that emotion called love. And besides, someone would have to clear out her corpse after she died; she didn’t want to be cursed at even in death for leaving behind a filthy house.
September 13th was the day for her courtesy call to her parents to tell them she was going abroad for work.
“Dad, are you free to talk?”
“Yes, my lecture is empty. What’s the matter, daughter?”
“Just... I was working at the company and I thought of you, Dad.”
“I only have my daughter. I’m doing well. You’re not having a hard time, are you, Suyeon?”
She couldn’t do it. Hearing his voice, she couldn’t bring herself to say she was going abroad for work. If it were truly abroad, it might be different, but she knew what that meant. Telling her father directly that his daughter was about to die was a truly grueling task.
“...Yes.”
“Good. Don’t worry about Dad and work hard. You don’t need to send money to Dad.”
“...?”
“Dad has some good news. I’ll tell you soon.”
“...Yes.... I understand.”
What kind of good news could it be? After work, she went to Boseong University Hospital, where her mother was hospitalized. 16th floor, general ward.
“Suyeon...! Why did you come all this way, you must be tired...?”
“Mom, are you okay?”
“Yes. Mom is fine. Why did you come? What’s wrong?”
Her mother, who used to struggle to breathe with an IV drip attached... “Mom, what is all this?”
“...? I don’t know. Didn’t you do this, Suyeon? I thought my daughter had taken care of everything...”
The IV drip was gone. She wasn’t struggling to breathe anymore, either. Her mother was just lying there, having briefly taken off a new, unfamiliar device she was wearing like a mask. No, she wasn’t just lying there. She could even sit up now.
“Mom, Mom... you shouldn’t be sitting up like that,”
“No, Mom has gotten better.”
“...?”
“The doctor came in the morning and said they needed to replace the device, and after I put this on, my chest opened up and I can breathe so well. My chest was always so tight.... Say, didn’t you do this? Who else would do this for me? Even the machine is brand new...”
September 14th was the day she was supposed to dine alone at Will Steakhouse. She had made a reservation, but she had already called to say she wouldn’t be coming. She had already eaten steak. At a much better place.
Instead of going, she sat in her chair after work and stared blankly at her phone. Wondering when he would reach out.
“Why isn’t he calling?”
Is he busy with work? If his V1 rank is real, he must be incredibly busy. Executive Director—no, even if he is a parachute hire, isn’t this too much? Some people are vomiting blood at 28 just to become an Assistant Manager, while others easily ascend to executive positions. However...
“...He acted like he was so good to me....”
Her phone remained silent. She had no friends, so there was no one else who would call. She had already thought through exactly what she would say if she picked up the phone. What if he said he was coming to her house? She would act like she didn’t want him to, in a forced, reluctant way.
“...Come or don’t come... it’s a waste of gas money.” She would say that, without showing she was happy about it. What if he asked her to go eat steak again?
“Get lost, I’m not eating.” Then he would force her to go, and she would subtly pay the bill, paying him back for the previous treat. This was her plan. Since she had already decided to die, she might as well spend her money before she went. Spending a few hundred thousand won out of her 700 million won insurance policy wasn’t a big deal. But...
“Damn it, why isn’t he calling....?”
“But Senior, why are you working so hard?”
“I don’t know. You’re the one who said Min Suyeon was a beggar!”
“...Even so, aren’t you overdoing it?”
“Just do it. Do it first and see. We just need to bring her in and have her work well. I’m going to make this a success no matter what.”
He left Eunbyul by his side and entered the Chairman’s office. As he opened the door, the Chairman, who had been waiting, said, “Oh, what brings you here? Ah... the secretary is here too. Alright, sit down.”
“Yes.”
He placed the approval documents in front of his father, the Chairman, who was sitting in the seat of honor.
“...?”
“You just need to sign here.”
“Hey, does this make any sense? How can you do this without any consultation...”
The contents of the approval documents were as follows:
1. Request for faculty appointment at Jayu Foundation per Chairman’s directive.
Target: Min Sangjin, Part-time Lecturer at Jayu University Department of Architecture > Associate Professor
2. Increase in limit for employee welfare medical expense support.
Existing: 1,800,000 won > 76,000,000 won
“If you want to help someone, use your own money...”
As if he couldn’t understand why he had to sign this, his father stared at him and was about to throw his pen. He had received an award and was doing well, so he was starting to get cocky—
“This is a necessary task to successfully complete the GPL project.”
“...Is that so? Ah. Hmm....”
“Yes. If you sign this, I will ensure the GPL project is a success.”
“...If that’s the case, then I must do it.”
“Exactly.”
“Well then. I must. Here. I’ve signed it. Take it.”
“So, I would be grateful if you could appoint the candidate as an associate professor.”
“....Ah... this needs to be discussed with the university headquarters...”
“It is the will of the ‘Foundation Chairman’.”
Eunbyul looked at him, her eyes crinkling as if to say he was truly shameless.
“Who is Lecturer Min Sangjin, and where is he?”
“I am Min Sang... Oh, Mr. President. Mr. President? What brings you here...”
“See me for a moment.”
Doowon, like other conglomerates, had its own foundations. A cultural foundation, a welfare foundation, and the Jayu Foundation. The purpose of the Jayu Foundation was simple: to ensure all students were free. And to continue the will of the 3rd Chairman, this foundation established Jayu Middle School, Jayu High School, and Jayu University. And the part-time lecturer in the Department of Architecture at that university was none other than Min Suyeon’s father.
“By any chance, do you have a connection with the Doowon Chairman...”
“...? How could I have a connection with such a person,”
“The Foundation Chairman is currently ordering the appointment of Lecturer Min as an associate professor, so I was wondering why he specifically singled him out...”
If the foundation says so, the university cannot refuse. Although it could be considered improper solicitation under the Private School Act...
“...My daughter works at Doowon. But...”
“...?”
“She is an Assistant Manager. She wouldn’t have even seen the President, let alone the Chairman...”
There was no one who could prove this was improper solicitation except for him, Eunbyul, and Min Suyeon. Therefore, it ceased to be improper solicitation.
“If you feel burdened, Mr. President, I don’t have to take such a position...”
“...No, if that is the will of the foundation, we cannot refuse. However, since the faculty quota for the Department of Architecture is currently full, we will treat him as an associate professor for now, but the lectures will remain the same as before...”
The President had intended to raise an objection if he thought it was strange, suspecting a connection with the Chairman. But there was none. After all, if someone had a connection with the Chairman, they would have been running the university as President themselves; they wouldn’t be working as a part-time lecturer.
“I understand.”
“For now, please tidy up your research lab. There is one lab left in the main building of the College of Architecture, so you can use that.”
“Yes. I will prepare.”
That was the good news Min Suyeon’s father had spoken of. Becoming an associate professor is a position that even an assistant professor on the proper track has to endure 5 to 9 years to reach. Just by having the word “Associate” attached, many things change on a level incomparable to a part-time lecturer. He no longer had to worry about being fired while fretting over not having lectures, and as long as he didn’t cause any major accidents or scandals, he could maintain his professorship at this university until retirement. As for the salary, it went without saying.