The Wounded Goblin Hero

Just as the one-eyed, one-armed goblin warrior in the dungeon's tutorial always shows up with a different weapon, the demented goblin shaman uses a different spell every time. Its spells belong to a mystical, irrational school of magic. It also boasts the largest repertoire of spells among all spellcasting systems. So, wouldn't there be at least one spell among that vast array capable of revealing status window information?

Thanks to the instance dungeon's nature, you can keep challenging the ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠boss even after clearing it. So my first step was to keep running the dungeon until I ranked up to 9th-grade hunter. Once I qualified to enter solo, I'd use Onahole Transformation every time the demented goblin shaman appeared, then activate Onahole Absolute Ownership to copy its skills or unique ability—repeating until I got the power I wanted. Sure, the odds were low since it was just a 10th-grade dungeon boss, but it beat doing nothing. And this was only step one anyway. Higher-grade dungeons teem with monsters boasting all sorts of abilities. Surely one of them would have something useful for me?

"...So stay sharp. Keep your distance and watch."

"Yes...!"

After my explanation, the tension from when we'd first entered the dungeon seemed to return—at least somewhat. It wasn't just blind nervousness anymore; there was a spark in her eyes. Yeah, she really wants to be a hunter, that's why she's here, I thought. Seeing that passion made me want to teach her a bit more. 10th-grade hunters had daily entry limits anyway, and there wasn't much else to do after clearing, so maybe I could show her some sword basics.

"Alright, let's go in."

Kiiiek— With the screech of a long-rusted door swinging open, I stepped into the boss room first. Then, the footsteps of An Jeong-hwa following behind vanished abruptly.

I turned to check—and my survival instincts screamed a dire warning. A powerful enemy is here.

I swiftly gripped a throwing dagger in my left hand—one I hadn't drawn yet—and my bastard sword in my right. My survival instincts had saved my life countless times, even in 7th-grade dungeons under Jeon So-young. My very survival skills had grown thanks to them. I trusted them more than anything I possessed, so I didn't doubt the alert. But I had questions. With my current physical prowess, I could take a 9th-grade dungeon boss without a scratch solo. For my instincts to blare like this in a 10th-grade boss room?

"Tutorial? The dungeon had something like this?"

As far as I knew, no one had ever mentioned it. But Unique Authorities were new to me too—maybe they altered the dungeon? No point questioning what had already happened. How I responded was what mattered.

"Hope Jeong-hwa's okay."

I'd seen the dimensional separation message, but I wasn't sure what it meant exactly. Had she been ejected outside the dungeon? Or had I entered a modified boss room alone while she went into the original one solo? The former was fine, but the latter spelled trouble. Praying she was alive, I resolved to clear as fast as possible and activated mana throughout my body.

The surroundings were a darker forest than previous rooms. Even in the near-pitch blackness under the dense canopy, my mana-infused eyes discerned shapes clearly. I sensed an enemy in the distance—about 25 meters away. In this thick woods, we couldn't see each other. But just as I'd detected it, it had sensed me. It was closing ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠in. 20m... 15m... 10m... At 5m, I hurled the throwing dagger.

A stone might've been blockable by a goblin, but a thrown dagger packed lethal force. Yet the figure bursting from the brush leaped aside effortlessly, dodging at close range, then lunged straight for my head.

Having anticipated various moves, I reacted sharply, slashing with my bastard sword to deflect the charge. Through the blade, I felt a weight no goblin frame should produce. I sent the enemy flying far off, reset my stance, and sized it up in shock.

"A... goblin?"

Goblins in Goblin's Tomb were a given. But this wasn't your standard goblin. For starters, it was female! And it had pink hair. Weren't goblins all bald, regardless of sex? Her vivid pink locks were tied in a ponytail, framing a face far too beautiful for a goblin—almost elven. Green skin, sure, but features that shattered the ugly monster stereotype.

Most striking were her breasts, each as big as her head, the source of that hefty impact. They were tightly bound in cloth to avoid hindering movement. From above, her waist was completely obscured. Her thighs and calves, packed with springy muscle proving her earlier leap, twitched as if ready to spring again. She looked like a perfect blend of elf grace, dwarf sturdiness, and goblin traits. What the hell is this? A real goblin? Some elf subrace?

Tutorial made the system oddly helpful; I skimmed it quickly. If the system called it a goblin, fine. Distracted by her looks earlier, I now spotted the injuries: a scar slashing across her pretty face over one eye, a missing left arm. Fitting the dungeon theme—one-eyed, one-armed. Plus, faint scars everywhere, still crusted with blood. She'd clearly rolled off a battlefield.

Her human-like features betrayed confusion in her eyes. Enemy or not, no reason to give her time to recover. I charged the female goblin.

Looks aside, this monster wanted me dead. Impressions could wait till I subdued her.

"Krruk!"

The busty goblin sensed my hostility and growled back, lunging in response.

Pop— She vanished from sight in an instant. I didn't panic, guarding overhead on instinct.

Kaang! A dagger slashed down from above, scraping my bastard sword's flat. Sparks flew from metal on metal. I trapped her against the blade's side and drove a knee strike up—but she retrieved her dagger and foot-planted on my sword, backflipping away swiftly.

She's faster than me.

That ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠momentary evasion out of sight. Acrobat-like agility despite injuries. Her agility was at least 20, maybe more. I was bigger and slower; she was smaller and quicker. I held back attacks, tightening defense.

Even so, peril kept coming. She'd leap for overhead strikes, then sweep low from behind at my ankles—chilling moments. This monster played mind games too, always targeting vitals. She'd mastered technique unlike any dungeon foe I'd faced. Our swordplay was even, maybe my edge, but her speed was insane—20? No, possibly 30+.

"Ugh!"

"Kerruk!"

And she weaponized her own breasts. Remembering my glances, she'd block my view with those head-sized mounds to hide dagger paths—then mock me with a kerruk laugh. I'd simmer with rage but refocus on defense. Without survival instincts' warnings, I'd be sliced in vitals by now.

I seemed pushed back constantly, but I was winning. Time was on my side. Boss room was finite; she was bleeding from wounds. Her small frame meant less blood loss tolerance than a human. The fiercer she fought to breach my guard, the faster she'd bleed out and tire.

That slowdown was my cue.

Chaeng— Coiled in wait, at weapon clash I shoved hard with power and timing. Finally, her speed dropped to where I could track and react.

"Keruk, ker..."

Exhausted, she landed panting, her bound breasts heaving massively. Now was the time to switch to offense. I hurled my two hidden throwing daggers in a surprise barrage—not aiming to hit. First targeted her ankle to force a high leap; second her head. Her opener had been a leaping ambush, most attacks since too. Under sudden pressure, she'd likely rely on her signature jump.

Predicting that blind leap, I'd already surged forward. Massive horizontal slash. No evasion midair. But even weary, she anticipated—deflecting my blade with her dagger, spinning away.

A feat needing light weight. But that was bait.

Thud—

"Kek—?!"

Expecting the dodge, I followed with a spinning heel kick powered by the slash's momentum, smashing her side. Crack— Ribs snapped; her ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠small form flew sideways, crashing into a tree and crumpling motionless to the ground.

I'd won. Certain of the lethal hit, I finally exhaled deep, shaking out my wrist.

"Whoa, fuck. What kind of goblin is this tough? Nearly died for real."

Hero-grade or not, an injured goblin this fierce was terrifying. Tension easing, I muttered as I approached the busty goblin.