Chapter 129
Chapter 129
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Translator: MadScientist
Chapter: 129
Chapter Title: I'll Use Your Dumb Constellation Bitches Well and Return Them, So Wait Quietly...!
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Do you know why flies rub their front legs together?
A fly's front legs are sensory organs.
They detect taste through them and sense danger too.
Front legs as tongues? This guy's freaking hilarious!
…Not the point, though.
What I'm saying is, don't mistake a fly rubbing its front legs for it apologizing.
"We're truly sorry…. It was reckless of us to select a sacrifice…."
The rankers who had sided with Jeong I-sol.
They'd joined our team.
Naturally, there was backlash from the crowd.
The rankers glanced at me nervously as they apologized to them.
What choice did they have?
If they acted all high and mighty here, they'd end up dead like Park Hee-yeon.
So their apologies weren't genuine.
They were just rubbing their 'survival senses' together.
"Taeyang. Can we talk for a sec?"
One minute until the boss wave.
Cloé had come looking for me.
"I just heard from the followers. The rankers might attack you."
"Hah? The boss wave's almost over. We're leaving this place. How're they gonna attack?"
"That's exactly what they're aiming for. Once the boss is down, it's done. So they kill you before that and claim the credit."
Not an unexpected turn.
Still, I'd hoped for a graceful finish.
Even if the start's a shitshow, a beautiful end makes it all good.
These guys were shit from start to finish, though….
Or maybe this works out perfectly.
I was itching to beat the crap out of them anyway.
"Got it. Head back to your position."
"I'll round up all the boar-pig execs!"
"Nah, no need. That'd create a manpower gap, and other heroes or followers might get hurt."
"But…! What about you?!"
"Hey, hey…!"
I bellowed to calm Cloé down.
"You think this body would lose to those worthless punks?"
"…."
Logically, yeah, I'd lose.
Dozens of Korea's top 1% heroes vs. a first-year Hero Academy student.
No-brainer, right?
But who am I?
The Blond Tanning Thug who steals enemy Constellations!
I weaken the foes and power myself up!
Mental destruction included!
Fsssh-
I pulled the 'Pheromone Perfume' from my subspace.
[Suspicious Perfume] -A colorless, odorless perfume. -Packed full of pheromones that seduce Constellations. A wide-area aggro perfume made for Constellations.
Like churu scent for cats.
Come at me, rankers!
I'll make you despair before Kim Taeyang, Guild Master of the new era…!
*
It looked like Riki was the one rallying the rankers again.
The guy who'd taken over as the new big shot after Jeong I-sol.
⚙ SYSTEM NOTIFICATION ⚙ [Boss Wave begins!] [Goal] [Deaths: 0/1] The wave ends if even one dies.
Or if everyone teams up to take down the boss mob.
Our team's power was more than enough for the latter.
Even so, the rankers decided to kill me.
Probably for advantages in the outside world, not this dungeon.
"Die quietly. We'll call it a noble sacrifice."
Riki warned from the front.
"Hey. Time's short. If we drag this out, the guild master boar-pig dies first and we leave the dungeon."
"So you die quick."
Roughly 20 vs. 1.
There were more rankers originally.
Some must've refused the offer.
Still over 20.
In that situation.
I just laughed.
"Kukukuk."
"Lost your mind?"
"You really think you punks can beat this body? Funniest shit ever."
"?"
That was when.
The super-kawaii cactus-chan bounced boing boing right in front of me.
"Hawawa…! Cactus-chan will fight to the end to protect Master…!"
"Cactus-chan! Go back to Jeong I-sol! We'll kill that thug punk!"
"Hawawa…! Can't do that…! Cactus-chan… decided to go to Master's home and become a potted plant…!"
Urgh…!
Cactus-chan's too dangerous!
My heart hurts from the cuteness!!
"Hey. Cactus boar-pig. Don't push yourself."
"Cactus-chan will protect you…!"
Cactus-chan's eyebrows drew a V.
She's strong, but not enough to scare rankers.
20 vs. 1, after all.
The heroines and other teammates were busy handling the swarming monsters.
A massive boss mob would appear soon.
No telling where from, so stay alert.
This fight was just me vs. the rankers.
"Hey hey!! Come on already!!! Time's ticking!!!"
"Is this punk's brain pickled in ego?!"
Finally, the rankers charged.
Their Constellations followed.
Though their intentions differed a bit.
⚔ STATUS ⚔ [Athena's Favorability rises insanely!] [Girard's Favorability rises insanely!] [Padumaru's Favorability rises insanely!] [Thor's Favorability rises insanely!] [Astarrian's Favorability rises insanely!] System messages popping up nonstop before my eyes.
Messages the rankers couldn't see.
Even if they could, it wouldn't matter.
No way they'd expect their Constellations to flip so easily.
"Hey hey!! Listen up, constellation boar-pig bitches!!! You'll contract with just the one who beats her hero best…!!!!"
"Wha-?"
Thwack-!
"Argh!"
Athena smacked her hero.
Girard, Padumaru, and countless others did the same.
At my word, they brutally pounded their own heroes.
"Taeyang-kun…! Look at meee…! I beat my hero to a pulp…-♡"
"Ow! Ow! Lady Constellation! Why?!"
"Die, you trash! How dare you defy Taeyang-nim!"
Thud! Thud! Thud!
Dozens of Constellations tenderly beating their heroes—a rare sight.
Unfolding right before my eyes.
"Hey, ranker boar-pig bitches!! Open your ears while getting smacked!!! This body stole all your Constellations!!! They were so dumb, seducing them was easy!!!"
"Urgh…. When the hell…?!"
The perfume's effect doesn't last long.
Differs per Constellation, but max about 10 minutes.
No one but me knows.
That this is a legendary artifact's doing.
"From now on, you become lifetime heroes of Justice!!! Obey the Guild Master's every command and stamp the contracts the guild offers without a word!!!"
"Hawawa~ Stamping time~"
"Wha…?! That's too unfair?!"
"Haaaaah?! What's unfair, you dumb boar-pig bitch!!! With your trash personalities not even worth recycling, shouldn't you be thanking us just for the contract?!?!?!"
"Hawawa~ Gotta be thankful~"
"But…!"
"Don't like it? No Constellations back!!! 10 seconds!!!"
"Hawawa~ Now 9 seconds~"
"…!"
Losing Constellations hits heroes hard.
Rankers could contract others, but finding higher-tier ones is tough.
Rank drop is inevitable.
"8! 7! 6…!"
"W-We can't just submit like…."
They had ranker pride, huh?
Hesitating, trembling.
Then don't even give them time for pride.
"5 4 3 2 1 ding…!"
"Wha…?! Wait! Why count so fast?!"
"I'll contract! Total obedience to the Guild Master!!!"
"Me too! Return my Constellation!!!"
"I surrender…!"
Unconditional surrender.
They knelt in the end.
Now what's left?
"Kukuku. Smart choice? Your dumb constellation bitches—this body will use them well and return them, so wait obediently…!"
"Wha…?! Use how?! Where?!"
"You don't mean sex with Constellations, right?!"
"Even for a thug, that's crossing the human line!"
"Son of a biiiitch-!!!"
No, fuck, who said sex?
Gotta save the guild master, duh.
*
Park Hee-yeon had given up.
She'd just sit and wait for death.
Even if small bug monsters nibbled her bit by bit,
Or a giant monster crushed her flat,
Any death, she'd accept.
Death.
It was fated anyway.
"Kyaaaaah!! Save meeeee!!!"
Of course, that's just talk.
She couldn't stay calm facing actual death.
Sitting and accepting death isn't for anyone short of a Tibetan monk.
Kieeeek!!
Monsters drooling as they swarmed.
Park Hee-yeon had no Constellation but B-rank Awakener level skill.
Enough to resist and buy some time.
'Buy time for what? I'm dying anyway!'
That thought lingered, but life’s unpredictable.
Sudden dungeon quake could change the rules, right?
Reversals bless those who never quit.
Park Hee-yeon wouldn't give up til the—
💥 CRITICAL HIT! 💥 Kwaaaaaang!
end,
But her legs gave out at the 3m mutant orc boss before her.
Boss mob.
"F-Fuck…."
Park Hee-yeon checked Blue Team.
They were fighting swarms and mutant orcs too.
Tough foes; battle dragged on.
Guoooooh!
Thud!
"Urgh!"
The orc swung its massive iron club.
It closed in slowly, like herding prey.
Instinctively, she headed toward Blue Team.
Clack.
The zone boundary.
Blocked off.
Less than 1m from Blue Team heroes, but no warmth shared.
Like invisible glass wall.
Completely separating them.
Wall unbreakable.
Top rankers tried; failed.
But.
A boss mob?
'Lure its attack to breach the wall…!'
Maybe.
Park Hee-yeon bet her life on the idea.
"Hey! Come at me, you ugly fuck! Hit me! Hit me!!"
Provocation worked.
Orc's face crumpled, muscles bulged.
"Gotta go all out! I was a decent brawler back in the day? Punch still packs a wallop! One hit flattens an ogre too…?"
Guoooo….
Orc's demeanor shifted.
Seemed confused, scared maybe.
'What? Did it understand me?'
Such absurd thought,
When.
💥 CRITICAL HIT! 💥 Paaaaaaaang───────────!!!
"Guh…?!"
Massive shockwave from behind.
Barrier shards and her body flew.
Airborne, gaze turned back.
'Kim Taeyang…?'
Kim Taeyang stood there.
Dozens of Constellations at his side.
'Why are the rankers' Constellations with him…?'
Mysterious.
Process aside, contracting that many? Questionable.
'Heroes' power scales with contracted Constellations. More means stronger… so he's… now…?'
"Hey, guild master boar-pig. Dodge well. No responsibility if you don't."
"…!"
Paaat-!
Kim Taeyang charged the orc.
Vanished like wind, reappeared before it.
His fist shot out.
Plain straight punch.
Except infused with dozens of Constellations' power.
💥 CRITICAL HIT! 💥 Kwajijijijijik!!!!
"…!"
Horrific rupture sound.
That alone screamed power.
But even sound couldn't contain it all.
'The orc… vanished…!'
Simple punch obliterated it.
No corpse left.
"Ahh- way too easy."
Then.
Rankers from the other camp rushed over.
"N-Now give back my Constellation!"
"Hey hey!!! Use honorifics!!!"
"P-Please! Return my Constellation! Please…!"
"Kukuku. Say, 'Please keep my Constellation forever and make her happy. This worthless cumrag will train watching videos from Taeyang-nim!!' Then you get 'em back!!!"
"Please keep my Constellation happy forever…!!"
"I'll just train…!!"
"I'm a worthless cumrag!! Please, my Constellation…!!"
"Tch. Noisy and boring."
Kim Taeyang snapped his fingers; Constellations returned.
Watching, Park Hee-yeon got chills.
'Was this… the answer…?'
Ignoring rankers' bullshit appropriately.
Her brother Park Chung-hyun's advice.
She thought she failed as guild master for not doing it.
But that has downsides.
Rankers leave.
Guild shrinks inevitably.
Is there no true solution…?
Operate normally and attract rankers…?
'Found it….'
Park Hee-yeon found it.
Through Kim Taeyang.
The answer was.
'Dictatorship…!'
Dictatorship.
Not born from bad ideas originally.
Just the most efficient politics.
Fatal flaw: crumbles if leader corrupts or incompetent.
Greek philosophers advocated 'philosopher-kings' dictatorship.
Philosopher-king.
Wise, virtuous person.
And strong.
'Kim Taeyang is the philosopher-king…!'
The talent to rule as dictator and shine the world was right here.