Chapter 26
Chapter 26
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Translator: Vine
Chapter: 26
Chapter Title: Just Smile
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Just smile.
The Yoo Seo-ah you knew is long gone.
It’d be better to just kill her here.
Think about your future.
How long are you going to let the Doctor hold you back?
Han Si-hoo, get a grip.
It’s better to deal with this ghost right here, right now.
It's just Yoo Seo-ah's shell.
She's rotted away because of the drugs.
No one will know.
Just say she died from the drugs.
Do you think this is the friend you knew?
Licking spilled drugs off the floor?
She's just another addict you'd see in the slums.
-Si-hoo.
He sees Seo-ah, smiling brightly.
She’s probably going to ask for drugs.
"Here, a present."
He was wrong.
The present was a paper crane.
Just like the paper crane she’d folded for him before, in return for the ribbon.
Back then, the page in the origami book was torn, so she couldn't fold it properly.
But now, there was this wonderful thing called a phone.
It's a useless gift.
Throw it in the trash.
She won't react anyway.
As long as you give her drugs, she won't care what you do.
She must have been like this before coming to you, too.
What did she do?
She must have needed a lot of money.
You know better than anyone, don't you, Han Si-hoo?
"Si-hoo?"
He could sense the pretense.
You, Han Si-hoo, are more sensitive to that than anyone.
Yoo Seo-ah only puts in effort to get her drugs.
She's not giving you a present for your sake.
[Status Window]
Level: 26
Health: 1291, Mana: 910...
Skills: Swordsmanship IX, Magic Arts VI...
Status: Purification Penalty (5 hours)
It's because of [Purification].
To be precise, Purification I.
There was a reason the skill was still only level one.
He was extremely reluctant to use it himself.
Purification was like a vacuum cleaner.
It sucked up filth.
But in its place, dust collected inside.
Han Si-hoo was suffering a penalty for a similar reason.
"You don't like it?"
The mana clinging to Yoo Seo-ah.
The weapon he was told couldn't be created was in his hand.
A sticky, black mana filled with malice.
He really shouldn't have used Purification.
Seo-ah had hated it, too.
He wasn’t treating her like a monster…
Weren't you?
Be serious.
A voice whispered endlessly in his head.
It would probably get better if he used Purification more and leveled up the skill, but not now.
"Ahah…"
I'm telling you, that's not the laugh you knew.
The drugs did this to her.
Shut up.
"Ah, thanks for the present."
He came to his senses and replied.
Yoo Seo-ah had been looking flustered as Han Si-hoo just stood there silently.
The Purification penalty was more distracting than he could have imagined.
Even sleep hadn't gotten rid of it completely.
It had been similar when he used Purification on monsters.
Their voices had been simple—kill, destroy, things like that—but after that uniquely unpleasant experience, he’d decided to stop using it directly.
At most, he would keep it on as a passive skill, which only caused a slight feeling of unease.
How long are you going to keep Yoo Seo-ah alive?
You may find me unpleasant, but I'm not wrong.
Your training, your growth, even your relationships are all falling apart.
Ignoring calls from people isn't going to do you any good.
"Si-hoo."
If you leave her like this, Yoo Seo-ah will only continue to suffer.
It's agonizing not to be able to control your own self.
Let's just strangle her and end it here.
If you don't want to do that, let's stab her.
Or we could lie, say it's her medicine, and give her poison.
Though a potent poison isn't much different from the drugs she's using now.
"Si-hoo, can I have some medicine…"
Seo-ah came to him again.
It was time to sleep.
But he hadn't been sleeping well.
Honestly, you're tired of this, aren't you?
How long are you going to keep this up?
Yoo Seo-ah wants you to kill her, too.
She said it herself back then.
Please kill me.
"Here."
Giving her the drugs means killing her slowly.
There were new wounds on her arms and hands.
Even her hands were wrapped in bandages.
Do you think the drugs will heal her?
You know it's not a cure.
"Thank you."
It was easier to let her use the sedative.
He was just following Lee Yoo-ram's advice.
Let's just kill her.
You don't need to feel guilty.
You heard what Seo-ah said.
That whisper, about how dying might not be so bad.
I think that would be the real present.
Shut up.
She's not even cleaning up the used syringes.
Just lying there, limp.
She's a parasite.
She even called herself trash.
Just waste.
Shut your mouth.
I'm only speaking the truth.
The academy entrance ceremony is just around the corner.
If Yoo Seo-ah is in this state, what do you think will happen in the Special Class?
Do you trust the academy?
-And now for tomorrow's weather. In Old Seoul District 1, where a Gate warning has been issued, strong winds and rain are expected...
Seo-ah stared blankly at the broadcast.
"Si-hoo."
She suddenly spoke.
"Yeah."
"I'll pay you back."
-Estimated damages are projected to be around 5 billion won...
It seemed the money she'd borrowed was on her mind.
"No, it's fine. Keep the money. It was a gift. You might need it later."
"......"
She looked like she wanted to do something, but she couldn't.
The person Yoo Seo-ah was most frustrated with was herself.
Fundamentally, she was someone who didn't belong in a place like this.
"...Si-hoo. What do you want most?"
-The typhoon's projected path is...
"What I want?"
To cure Seo-ah.
For her to go back to how she used to be.
For now, that was his priority.
"Something you wish for."
I want to undo my choice.
I want to go back to the past and save Seo-ah.
I want to save her from the malice that seeped in from who knows where.
It's too late now.
If this were a story, you've reached the final chapter.
You must feel it, that Yoo Seo-ah's story is slowly coming to an end.
Perhaps it's a story that should have ended already.
Shut up.
There has to be hope.
"...Going back to how things were, I guess."
To that time when there were no problems.
To when we could solve any problem that came up, together.
It was painful to see his broken friend.
He kept seeing her past self superimposed over the present.
Her old self, with that innocent smile.
Now, she just giggled foolishly under the influence of drugs.
He recalled the past.
-I won today, right? I got here first, so that means I win, right?
The memory of a race they'd had.
A past that was hard to imagine, seeing her cooped up at home all the time.
-You thought I forgot your birthday, didn't you? I was actually preparing it all along. Surprised?
A memory from his birthday.
A small cake she'd bought with money she'd saved up bit by bit.
He always had a good friend waiting for him when he came home.
It was okay to call her family.
All in the past tense.
He was happy back then.
But what about now?
His childhood friend had lost her mind.
She was covered in wounds, and he didn't even know who or what had done it to her.
"Back to how things were..."
Yoo Seo-ah repeated his words, her gaze shifting back to the screen.
"How things… were..."
She muttered again.
"What were things like… back then."
It was something Yoo Seo-ah wanted for herself, too.
She half-covered her face with her fingers as if deep in thought.
The adhesive bandage and the newly wrapped gauze on her hand stood out.
"I'll figure something out."
***
First, I need to change my voice.
My tone and manner of speaking are too languid.
It's partly from exhaustion, but the sedatives are a big factor.
I practice in front of the mirror in my room.
With the door closed, in a small voice.
"Ah, ah."
There's still time before the academy entrance ceremony.
I should be able to manage something by then.
Let's bring back the bright Yoo Seo-ah.
Because that's what Si-hoo wants.
"Hi."
Smile, try to smile naturally.
Smiling is your specialty, isn't it?
It's not like you have much else to offer.
I can form a smile.
But the muscles around my eyes feel a little slack.
A sunny smile. Let's try to reproduce the Yoo Seo-ah who was the complete opposite of who I am now.
I summon good memories from the past.
Situations that would have made Yoo Seo-ah smile.
How did I smile during those happy days?
"Hi, Si-hoo."
Want to play?
Is that what Yoo Seo-ah would have said when she was little?
"Hi."
Fortunately, I remembered how to smile.
I mean, I smile every day.
I'm smiling better now than when I went to borrow money from Han Si-hoo last time.
This is pathetic.
I maintain the expression, even as the thought crosses my mind.
It's not working well.
There's a unique brightness to it, one that borders on looking foolish.
It's different from a face steeped in pleasure.
[5 hours, 11 minutes]
There's plenty of time, so it's okay to smile.
Not that there was ever a time I wasn't smiling.
It was rare for Yoo Seo-ah to face someone with a blank expression.
There are some people who find it harder *not* to smile.
Yoo Seo-ah was one of them.
She'd always had such a bright personality.
"...Getting beaten, stabbed, and still staying bright... that's more..."
Weird.
Scary, isn't it?
No, I did smile a little, even while being hit.
Am I a scary person?
"Maybe I should start exercising again."
Of course, it's not like I could ever match up to Awakeners.
I'm just trying to go back to when Yoo Seo-ah was active.
But strenuous activity wears down the drug's effects.
[5 hours, 9 minutes]
This was why I rarely went outside after starting the drugs.
I'd often seen the warning that the effects could diminish.
I feel sorry for Han Si-hoo.
I haven't paid back any of what I've received.
I've just been here, as if telling him to watch his broken friend.
If this continues, I really am trash.
Remaining a burden is a problem.
It's wise not to drag Han Si-hoo down.
"Again."
I try smiling.
Yoo Seo-ah didn't always smile in the same monotonous way.
Let's try to imitate it.
The problem is that my expression is strangely tinged with fear.
I look like I have no confidence.
Even living in the slums, Yoo Seo-ah was always overflowing with confidence.
"Smile."
Was it from the moment I failed to overcome the drugs?
Or from the moment I pushed Han Si-hoo away?
Or was it simply from the moment I admitted I was powerless?
"Again."
I want to break the mirror.
Why are you still here?
How dare you still be alive and walking around.
That's what it feels like it's saying.
"Again."
I try to recall happy memories from the past.
The Doctor giving me medicine.
That 100-hour dose… I still remember that.
"If I do well… I can use the drug."
[4 hours, 54 minutes]
I have a spare syringe.
Han Si-hoo doesn't know my exact dosage anyway.
It's wise to keep an extra on hand.
I saved this syringe for a time like this.
Smile nicely.
Heh.
Hehe.
Ahah.
I think I'm smiling well now.
I look happy.
*Stab.*
[8 hours, 1 minute]
Nice.