You, From Now On My Exclusive Cat Tower
I muttered to myself, ‘Aaargh… what the hell is up with them, really…!’
Han Seo-ah and Cha Si-a.
Si-woo’s childhood friend with her medium-length orange hair, and Cha Si-a—the ash-blonde two-tone gyaru who never shut up.
They were glaring at each other like rival cats fighting for territory, tails puffed up and ready to pounce.
Honestly, it felt like my lungs were literally about to collapse.
Even the stares from the rest of the class had been glued to us like popcorn kernels for ages now.
Even Cha Ga-eun, that Ice Princess sitting up front, was shooting me a glare that said, ‘You trash brat…’
My flashy debut plan had been completely torpedoed the second the first-period break started.
‘Okay, I have to get out of here somehow…!’
Just as I was sweating buckets and calculating the perfect escape window from this suffocating triangle, something popped up right in front of me.
“Uwah… it’s noisy…”
The tiny figure in the seat in front of me suddenly poked her head up.
“Huh?”
“What?”
Both Seo-ah and Si-a’s fiery stares snapped downward at the same time.
Lee Eun-ha.
The petite girl wearing an oversized dark-blue cat-ear hoodie, hair all messy from sleep, rubbing her eyes as she stretched in her seat.
She was still hugging her cat plushie like it was the only thing keeping her alive.
“Seriously… why are you guys so loud from the start? I couldn’t sleep at all…”
Her half-lidded, sleepy eyes flicked between the two of them, full of that weirdly addictive drowsiness.
Both Seo-ah and Si-a suddenly looked like they’d swallowed a lemon—speechless.
“Eh, um… sorry. We were too loud, huh?”
Si-a, the ultimate social butterfly, smiled awkwardly and apologized first.
Seo-ah quickly dropped her guard too. “Ugh… sorry.”
‘Wait, this was actually easy? Cute wins again!’
But my relief lasted all of three seconds.
“Uuuuum… pillow… my pillow’s scent…”
Eun-ha’s sleepy eyes rolled toward the ceiling, then suddenly turned toward me. She started wobbling over, cat-like and unsteady.
Then—
*Poof.*
“…?!”
The next thing I knew, this insane cat had squeezed right between Si-a and Seo-ah and was rubbing her forehead against my chest like it was the most natural thing in the world.
“Ahh… yeah, this smell. Super cozy… and steady…”
“Hey! What are you doing—?!”
I instinctively shot my hands up in panic.
“Mr. Police Officer, I swear I didn’t do anything! This cat just climbed on me by herself!”
But Eun-ha didn’t care about my flailing arms. She just wrapped both of hers around my waist, burying her cheek in my shirt.
The sweet vanilla scent of milk tea wafted up from her, and through the thin hoodie I could feel the soft, plush warmth of her body.
After three years of only smelling protein-powder breath, this violent softness hit my brain like a brain-freeze switch had flipped on.
‘Oh no… my head’s going white…!’
While my mind was still rebooting, my eardrums suddenly got blasted by a loud crunch.
“Hey. Han Si-woo.”
“Eh? Huh? What’s up~ Ah, ahahaha…”
“You look like you’re plotting something filthy right now.”
“What the hell are you talking about?! I’m in deep shit here!”
Seo-ah’s eyes started blazing with murderous intent.
Cha Si-a, on the opposite side, just burst out laughing. “Wow, you really are a legend. We thought you were just a crazy pervert who bossed around your sister, but now you’ve got girls glued to your chest?”
“I have no idea what you’re saying!”
Eun-ha, still tucked safely in my arms, just kept making that weird cat noise, “Uwah…” and finally closed her eyes, content to stay where she was.
“Hey! You’re not going to fall off, right?! Si-woo’s in trouble here!”
Finally fed up, Seo-ah reached for Eun-ha’s shoulder.
But right then—
*Snap!*
Eun-ha’s eyes popped open, and she swatted Seo-ah’s hand away like a cat protecting her territory, pulling me even tighter.
“Don’t touch.”
“What?!”
“This… is my personal cat tower. I claimed it first.”
‘…Cat tower?’
I didn’t agree, but if she insisted…
“Haa?! Cat tower?! Are you kidding?! Who do you think you are suddenly claiming ownership?!”
“The one who’s been held first is the owner. And…”
Eun-ha lifted her head just enough to stare straight at my jawline and neck, then grinned with a flash of tiny fangs.
“Your chest… it’s so wide and firm. And that scent smells really good. Perfect for my personal pillow…”
“Hiiik…!”
Seo-ah’s face turned beet red like it was about to explode.
“Insane…! How do you just say something so shameless like that?!”
“Ahahaha! Hey, Han Si-woo! How soft is your body that she’s losing her mind like this? Can I touch too?!”
Si-a was clutching her stomach and laughing hysterically.
“Stay away! Just leave me alone, please!”
I had wanted a harem.
But not this kind of chaotic, dizzying harem!
-♪♪
But right as things were getting ridiculous, the bell rang for the second period.
“Crap… see you later, Si-woo!”
Seo-ah stormed off muttering, while Si-a winked and blew a kiss. “I’ll come again later~”
“Phew…”
I’d survived ten years of this. My back was soaked in sweat.
I exhaled in relief and gave Eun-ha’s shoulder a little pat while she was still clinging to me.
“Hey, Eun-ha? The bell just rang. You can let go now. The teacher’s coming.”
“Uuuu… no. Just five more minutes…”
“If I keep this up, we’ll get marked on our first day!”
“Hiiing…”
Eun-ha pouted like I’d stolen her favorite toy, but she finally sat up and—without even leaving her seat—flopped right back down on her desk and went right back to sleep.
‘She’s really a cat…’
Soon after, the advanced Korean History teacher walked in, and unlike the boring first-period intro, this time it was full self-introduction and orientation.
The teacher’s lullaby voice filled the classroom, and right when I thought Eun-ha was still asleep, she suddenly started fidgeting again.
‘What’s she doing?’
I peeked over. Eun-ha had pulled out her portable game console from her hoodie pocket and was furiously mashing buttons under the desk.
‘Playing on the very first day of school? She’s definitely not normal.’
I wondered what game she was so into when I glanced down.
On the screen, a naked warrior was rolling around, dodging a dragon’s fire breath.
‘Eh…? That’s [Dark Soul 4]!’
The notoriously difficult soulslike game that had destroyed thousands of gamers’ mental health.
It was the same one I’d spent over 500 hours grinding in my hikikomori days, throwing controllers at the wall.
Eun-ha’s character on screen kept dying to the dragon’s tail sweep, flashing “YOU DIED” in bright red.
“Aaaa… died again…”
Eun-ha let out a tiny groan and bit down on her cat-ear hoodie.
‘Tsk tsk. When the tail comes down, you don’t roll—parry with your shield first, then dodge left.’
My tutoring instincts started twitching.
I couldn’t stand watching her bronze the fight. It was painful.
I quickly checked around, then poked Eun-ha’s back with my sharp fingertip.
“Uuuu…?”
Eun-ha turned her head and looked at me.
I whispered in the tiniest voice I could manage.
‘(When the tail sweeps, pause for one beat and roll left. When the fire breath comes, dash straight between her legs.)’
I mouthed every word silently.
“…?!”
Eun-ha’s eyes went huge.
Though she looked suspicious, she turned back to the screen and followed my instructions exactly.
Clack, clack!
The dragon reared up its tail.
If she’d done it the old way, she would’ve eaten the hit.
But she paused exactly one beat and rolled left.
Whoosh!
Perfect dodge!
Then the dragon tilted its head back to breathe fire, and Eun-ha’s character sprinted straight between its legs and started slashing wildly.
‘Yes! Just keep doing that!’
She kept nailing every pattern, barely scraping through the boss fight, and finally—
[BOSS CLEARED]
Explosive golden text flashed across the screen as the giant dragon crashed to the ground.
“…!”
Eun-ha’s tiny shoulders trembled.
She dropped the game console, spun her chair around, and stared straight at me with sparkling eyes like she’d just found a 100-churro box.
“You… who are you?”
“Eh? Ah, I just… I used to play that game a long time ago…”
“You used to play? I’ve died to that boss at least fifty times.”
Eun-ha leaned her upper body over my desk, getting right in my face again.
The sweet milk-tea scent made my nose tingle.
*Swipe.*
She suddenly pulled a strawberry-flavored jelly from her pocket and gently pressed it into my hand.
“What’s this?”
“Future exclusive strategy wiki. And as I said earlier—you’re now my personal cat tower. During breaks, you stick right next to me. If you run away…”
Eun-ha flashed her little fangs and grinned.
“I’ll bite you.”
‘…?’
Building my own harem kingdom?
That was so over.
The spring sunlight pouring through the window was bright and cheerful, and the strawberry jelly in my hand felt oddly warm.
…Well.
After being ignored for so long because of my looks, I was starting to think maybe things weren’t so bad after all…?