If You're Coming, Come After I've Eaten
If you're coming, come after I've eaten. The pizza in this daeyeokmul didn't have tomato sauce. Instead, they'd added sansho pepper to cut through the richness with a numbing spiciness that kept you going back for more. ......It was way too damn expensive, though, so I couldn't eat my fill.
Anyway, aside from running into those weirdos just before lunch, nothing else went wrong. Thanks to that, we happily toured the famous spots in Jongno's Pi-mat-gol before heading back to Yi In-su's house.
"Thank you. Safe travels."
"Aigoo! Thank you, young master!"
The rickshaw man who'd brought us all the way to Yi In-su's place bowed his head and departed. As we waved him off, Eori—who'd arrived first and been waiting—approached.
"M-Master. What shall we do about this?"
"Huh? What's up? Did we forget something back at Pi-mat-gol?"
"N-No, it's not that......"
Eori glanced uncertainly at the gate to Yi In-su's house. A line had formed there, stretching out like at some hot eatery—though it hadn't been there this morning.
"Huh? Who are those people?"
"I-I don't know, sir. Takji, do you know who they are?"
"No idea. I've never seen this place so mobbed before."
Oho, sharp kid. He even knew the four-character idiom munjeonseongsi. I still couldn't believe this was the Tiger-slaying Boy, but I ruffled Takji's clever head anyway. Pointing to the end of the line, I said,
"Let's go stand there for now. We need to get in too, right?"
"Y-Yes, that's true."
I had no idea what was going on, but we couldn't cut like those jerks from earlier. I led Eori and Takji to the back of the line.
"Hm?"
The guy who'd been at the end turned to look at us. He eyed us over one by one, then chuckled in disbelief.
"You kids wouldn't be showing up empty-handed, would you?"
My hands were empty, sure, but my belly was stuffed.
"Tch. How could we visit someone important bare-handed? Go buy some ginseng over there at least."
He seemed like one of the folks here to see Yi In-su. Not just him—everyone up ahead was carrying something. Or had it slung on their backs. It wasn't my business or Yi In-su's, but for some reason, my lips curled up. Lightly teasing Takji, I said,
"Hey, looks like the old man's pretty popular. Check out all these guests."
"Y-Yes? Well, visitors came often, but not like this......?"
"You've only seen him as the local magistrate down in the provinces till now. Now that he's up in Hanyang, the crowds are finally gathering."
"Hm? You're here to see the master of the house?"
Takji was tilting his head, puzzled, while the question came from the uncle who'd scolded us about empty hands.
"In that case, go right on in."
"Huh? Then what's this line for?"
"It's for waiting on the Tiger-slaying Boy. What else?"
"Really? I thought it was for seeing the old man. Nope, it's for the Tiger-slaying Boy. Huh?"
That's me, you know?
"......"
"......"
Eori and Takji stared at my face, clearly thinking the same thing. Just to make sure we hadn't misheard, I asked the uncle again.
"Excuse me. This is really the line for the Tiger-slaying Boy?"
"That's right. You didn't even know what the line was for and just joined the end?"
"Yeah. Saw the line and figured we'd wait."
"Haha! What a bunch of airheads. Haven't you heard the Tiger-slaying Boy—who's been down in the sticks—is finally in Hanyang?"
"Word spread that fast?"
It'd been two days—less than 24 hours, really. I hadn't even advertised my arrival, and here were easily over ten people queued up.
"You punk. Were you living in the mountains or what? How do you not know the latest news?"
"Sorry. I only got to Hanyang yesterday."
"If it was yesterday, yeah, you might not have heard. No need to apologize—huh?"
The uncle, nodding understandingly, whipped his head back toward me so fast his neck cracked.
"Wait, hold on—you don't mean......?"
He pointed at my face with one finger, then straightened his hand and pointed again. His tone and manner both turned polite as he asked,
"Could you be... the Tiger-slaying Boy...?"
"Yeah, that's me."
"No, I-I mean, th-this way! This way, please!"
The moment he realized who I was, his attitude flipped. Flashing a friendly grin, the uncle led me straight to the gate. The people who'd been waiting jeered as I cut ahead.
"What the hell are you doing? Can't you see we're all lined up?"
"Hey now! Who dares speak such nonsense?"
It wasn't me saying that, of course. The uncle—who'd totally switched up—scolded them like he was my servant.
"This is the Tiger-slaying Boy himself! Watch your mouths!"
"Whoa, for real?"
"First time meeting you, sir!"
Hearing who I was, they flipped too. Smiling warmly, they bowed; some even tried handing over their gifts.
"Tiger-slaying Boy! It's nothing much. Just something lying around the house."
"Hey! How could we give the Tiger-slaying Boy trash from home? Sir, this is stone honey, you see."
"Stone honey? Honey's honey! And this is sea cucumber, sir. Cucumber from the sea."
Suddenly, I flashed back to the Chunbun archery contest. Those girls who'd swarmed me, eyes blazing with ambition the second they learned I was the Tiger-slaying Boy. These folks were no different.
"Yes, hello. Hi there."
Burdened or not, I couldn't just brush them off. Bowing my head vaguely in greeting, I herded Eori and Takji inside.
"Oho! Si-jin, my boy! Finally here? Why so late! Haha!"
Yi In-su, out in the courtyard, spotted me and chided me with a beaming smile. Gesturing at the line filling the yard, he said,
"Look at this! They're all here to see you! Go mingle!"
"Sure. Hello."
"What, you gonna do it right here? Haha! Come on, this way! Eori, Takji—go play for a bit! Si-jin's got a lot on his plate!"
Separated from my playmates, I was practically dragged to Yi In-su's private quarters. There, I had to greet a horde of people.
"Greetings, sir. I'm in the merchant trade."
"Just as the rumors say—truly imposing and handsome! Have you arranged a marriage yet? My daughter's quite the beauty."
"Any inconveniences since arriving in Hanyang? If you're still weary from the journey, come by our gisaeng house."
"Word of the boy's valor has reached even our forge. This is an iris sword we've forged specially for you. We've come begging you to accept it."
It was like reliving the bloodbath of Burat's Rebellion all over again. Greet a guy, chat a bit, send him out—then another comes in. Rinse and repeat.
"I eagerly await our next meeting."
A dignified older lady bowed to me and left. Through the open door, twilight shadows were already gathering.
"Elder. Anyone else?"
"Haha, no. That lady was the last."
"Aaah! I'm gonna die!"
Knowing she was the end of it, I flopped onto the floor mat despite the rudeness. No food since lunch, greeting guests nonstop—my vision was swimming.
"Hahaha! That dramatic already?"
Yi In-su laughed heartily at my childish flop. Grinning teasingly, he asked,
"Si-jin. Didn't know your fame was this big, huh?"
"If I'd known it was this much, I would've stayed home instead of coming to Hanyang."
I sat up as I answered. Even at under twenty, I felt my blood sugar crashing from exhaustion.
Damn, I really am famous. If I'd known, I'd have hunkered down at home and only come out for the mugwa exam. Aaah, so tired I'm dying.
Dozens had visited today alone, and as many more had sent letters. Gifts overflowed the room and spilled into the courtyard.
"Pardon the intrusion."
A maid's voice came from outside—the same one I'd refused this morning when she tried dressing me. She brought good news.
"Dinner is served."
"Bring it in!"
"Yes, sir."
"Time to get up."
Huh? What? Just for you? What about me? Am I not getting any?
I misunderstood when Yi In-su stood and left. But seeing Eori haul in a massive tray alone cleared it up.
No, the misunderstanding wasn't the issue. I jumped up to help her.
"Whoa! Eori! Let's carry it together! That's heavy!"
"Heehee! No need! I can manage!"
That didn't look manageable solo. Eori was carrying enough for me to sprawl out on. Guess her dad hadn't just passed down height—strength too.
"Enjoy your meal."
"Eori. What about you?"
"I've already eaten, sir."
The tray brimmed with tasty banchan, but exhaustion killed my appetite. Sitting before it, I patted the spot beside me.
"Eori. Come here a sec."
"Pardon?"
"Quick, come on. Sit here."
"Yes, sir."
Perplexed but obedient, Eori sat. Seizing the moment, I leaned into her like collapsing.
"M-Master?"
"Mmm, Eori. I'm beat today. Just like this for a bit."
"Your dinner......"
"This is more urgent right now. A little longer. Just a bit."
No exaggeration. Eori's warm embrace soothed the fatigue from hours of greetings. Revived, my appetite returned.
"Haa, feeling human again. Huh? Eori?"
As I tried sitting up, Eori pulled me back with her left arm. Whispering as she picked up chopsticks with her right,
"Master. Let me feed you."
"Whoa, no need."
"I insist. Which banchan would you like?"
You. ......I barely held that back. Ignoring my over-revved energy, I pointed to the meat.
"That skewered meat. I want some."
"Yes, sir."
Eori picked up a bite-sized piece. As I opened my mouth to receive it, chaos erupted outside.
Crash!
"Kyaaak!"
Something toppled amid a woman's scream. I sprang from Eori's arms, grabbing the gifted iris sword. Half-drawing the straight blade when Yi In-su burst in.
"S-Si-Si-Si-jin!"
Yi In-su was a mess. Covered in banchan sauce like the tray had flipped on him. Pale-faced, even his beard quivered.
"S-Si-Si-jin!"
"Yes! Elder! What happened?!"
"A-A-A-A g-g-guest... has arrived."
What guest? Night visitor?
"Th-Th-Th-the Crown Prince... H-His Highness... is here!"
I sheathed the half-drawn iris sword and thought,
If you're coming, come after I've eaten.