Theocracy with Abhorrent Intelligence (4)
The day before we entered the conference chamber.
"Hello there, little fleshlings!"
We stood staring at the terminal drone that Alina—an ancient AI and full-fledged person, or so she claimed her name was—had dragged along, sunk deep in serious deliberation.
"How do we ease the councilors' and the Empress's revulsion toward Alina, even a little?"
The Holy Sevelian Empire already harbored a fierce loathing for anything in the "human" category of synths. And now we had to march Alina straight into the most bigoted body of all—the Imperial Council—and announce that we had brought home something magnificent.
After scraping together every pro-foreign faction we could find inside the Foreign Executive Ministry and thrashing the problem out, one answer rose to the top.
"The best approach is to hang our religion's symbols on Alina the AI."
"Symbols?"
"Yes, Your Excellency."
At first we tried plastering the terminal—which looked like a giant supercomputer—with the Empire's crest and every religious emblem we could find. That, unfortunately, created its own problem.
"Minister."
"Yeah."
"Are we planning to sell Miss Alina somewhere inside the Empire, or what?"
"…"
"Honestly, the way she looks right now isn't empire-friendly at all—it's just like the sponsor logos stuck on athletes' uniforms, yeah."
Sadly, none of us possessed the aesthetic sense to arrange those symbols with any artistry… and, just as Riel said, the visual result was nothing short of traumatic.
"Then what do we do?"
"Hmm…"
I would have loved a flood of ideas, but with me—the head of the Foreign Executive Ministry—sitting right there, everyone was clearly too cautious to speak freely.
If I just throw out random suggestions myself, that won't help either…
"Tsk."
The involuntary click of my tongue only made the room sink deeper into silence.
At this rate I might as well slap the Imperial seal on her and call it a day.
But solutions to problems like this always come from the least expected corner.
"What if we first change Alina's terminal from this container-style drone into a humanoid chassis?"
"Hmm…?"
"If we can't design machines properly, then since we're human, why not make Alina's body human as well? That should make things easier, shouldn't it?"
Someone who had been quietly listening from the corner spoke up. I lifted my head and looked at the speaker.
"…Hmm. Where do you work?"
"Uh… if I've overstepped, I'm terribly sorry…"
"Answer."
"I-I'm with the Sixth Division of the Diplomatic Administration Bureau."
"Rank?"
"…I-I just entered Grade Nine…"
"Well, you're Grade Eight starting now. Work hard."
"Excuse me?"
Perhaps it was the immediate promotion of the fellow who had floated that brilliant idea. From that moment on, every civil servant whose eyes had lit up with the scent of advancement unleashed a whirlwind of opinions thick with pure mania.
"Minister! I've got a great idea!"
"So do I!"
Yak-yak-yak-yak-yak-yak.
"As people of faith, the most important thing is the clothing, is it not?"
"And the religious symbols we mentioned earlier… the Imperial seal."
"The seal has to catch the eye the instant she walks in, so let's put it in the most conspicuous place."
"What about gender?"
"Does it matter? She's an artificial intelligence."
"Most of the people she'll face are men, so a female form would soften the impression…"
After a thoroughly wholesome(?) debate and discussion…
"Excellent. This is how Alina's form will be decided!"
We finally settled on how we would introduce her.
And now, the present.
Oh, for the love of…
I was privately reeling at the sight of Alina, who looked a little different from the version we had approved in the meeting.
No, the form I saw was nothing like this.
I had no particular objection to Abhorrent Intelligence—AI Alina—possessing a personality and a pair of maternal pouches… but combining that figure with a nun's habit that preached abstinence had evolved her into something dangerously overpowered.
"Mmm…"
"In the Imperial Audience Chamber, of all places… ahem."
"T-truly vulgar."
One glance at the reactions of the nobles and councilors present made it painfully clear this was not the outcome I had expected.
And those reactions were the mild ones.
"Gah!!!!"
"How dare you bring Abhorrent Intelligence into the sacred Imperial Palace looking so lewd!"
"You wench—has the invasion of Abhorrent Intelligence finally begun?!"
The spiritualists who made up the overwhelming majority of the Sevelian Empire were frothing at the mouth and thrashing about at the mere sight of Alina. Those who pursued an ascetic life, in particular, tore into her appearance itself…
"Look at that lascivious figure! How dare you parade such a body into the Audience Chamber!"
"Little fleshlings, this physical form was modeled after the body of the one you call the Empress of this Empire, you know?"
"…"
Perhaps it was the sudden Talulah Alina had just dropped.
"Ahem…"
"Come to think of it, it doesn't seem quite so… improper."
"Indeed—rather, it is a sacred body far too holy for mere Abhorrent Intelligence, is it not?"
The very people who had been ranting about Alina's body moments earlier were now, without missing a beat, heaping praise on that same body alone. That same caution seemed to grip the other factions as well.
"We must never allow that body to be defiled!"
"You fiend of Abhorrent Intelligence…! To make Her Majesty's loyal subjects insult her in this fashion…!"
"As expected of Minister Arto—what a cunning trap."
Ah, crap. We're screwed.
In the blink of an eye I had been cast as the wicked minister who had deliberately lured the opposition into a trap so I could crush them. I was weeping tears of blood on the inside. The very measure I had thrown in to reverse the situation had only made everything worse.
At this rate Artraia might snap and crush both me and Alina together.
With no further cards left to play, I was just about to resign myself to fate when—
…Huh?
Among the gazes fixed on me I felt something odd. I turned my head in that direction… and at the end of it stood Artraia, her face blooming with unmistakable delight for reasons I could not begin to fathom.
—Hwaaaaa…!
"…?"
The moment our eyes met, her faintly reddened lids curved and she even offered me a small, soft smile.
What the hell is this?
What on earth was she so happy about? Was she thrilled because she finally saw a chance to keep me as a palace pet and work me to the bone?
If this keeps up I'm going to end up treated as her pet-pet, not even a consort.
Sensing genuine danger, I decided to reverse the tide by launching into a passionate speech about Alina's capabilities.
"The reason I have brought this ancient AI—known as Alina—is as follows."
"Hmm?"
"What stands before you is merely a humanoid interface for adult use that Alina operates. Her true self is the underground facility that fell into the national park and was subsequently cleared away."
—Murmur murmur
"So that AI is the culprit behind the incident?"
"Culprit? Is she not merely an involved party?"
As my words spread, the councilors' whispering grew louder…
Artraia, give me some kind of reaction, please.
Yet Artraia simply kept that radiant expression, offering no particular response at all.
"I brought her here for no other reason."
"Then why, Minister, have you brought Abhorrent Intelligence into this chamber?"
"Because she has rendered us aid, it is only right that our Empire extend a helping hand to Alina in return."
So I pressed harder, amplifying Alina's presence in a desperate bid to derail Artraia's pet-keeping scheme.
"Aid? In what manner, Minister Arto?"
"In the past she was a high-grade AI that administered a planetary city of the ancient empire. She has expressed her will to serve our Empire by exercising those same abilities."
"You mean… you intend to grant that Abhorrent Intelligence the post of planetary governor?"
"…"
"Preposterous!"
"By the laws of the great Holy Sevelian Empire, it is impossible for a non-human entity such as Abhorrent Intelligence to occupy a governor's seat!"
Opposition flared up like wildfire, of course…
"Hmm. Let us hear the rest of the proposal first."
"Y-yes, Your Majesty!"
Fortunately, Artraia showed interest exactly as I had hoped, and the situation advanced another step.
"My plan is this: ideally, we would employ her according to her original design purpose—as an auxiliary system for planetary governors…"
"Impossible!"
"Even as an auxiliary, would that not amount to falling under the dominion of Abhorrent Intelligence?!"
The moment the words left my own mouth, the rejection became truly violent—like water meeting magnesium in a passionate embrace. I thought, Well, of course, and pulled out the next option.
"Alternatively, the Foreign Executive Ministry would like to encourage the use of her capabilities in diplomacy and other fields."
"Granting a public office to Abhorrent Intelligence is itself extremely dangerous, is it not?"
"Indeed—the Foreign Executive Ministry could suddenly be rendered useless by Abhorrent Intelligence."
These people hated the mere existence of Abhorrent Intelligence, so even the fallback plan met fierce resistance. However…
"If not that, then to aid the Empire's technological development we could entrust her to Minister Vermouth of the Ministry of Technology and Science…"
"Come to think of it, it would be best for the Foreign Executive Ministry to take charge of that AI."
"I agree. If we hand that madwoman the computational power of an AI capable of managing an entire planet, I cannot even begin to predict what might happen."
The moment the name of the universally acknowledged lunatic left my lips, the council immediately seized upon my second option. And Artraia, who had been watching the entire exchange…
"Hmm. Then that AI shall be placed under the Foreign Executive Ministry."
…delivered a clean, decisive conclusion.
The Empress's Delight
Although she failed to turn you into a palace pet, the Empress found your actions far more pleasing than expected. She has decided to overlook the blunder you committed.
Arto Virtorius Seveli's fatigue has been restored.
When the event messages appeared on top of everything else, I felt far more invigorated than before and offered Artraia a deep, respectful bow.