Chapter 110
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Translator: penny
Chapter: 110
Chapter Title: The Mayor and Churros
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Leaving the koala's teachings behind, we headed to the next holy site.
Our destination was the capybara experience cafe.
The moment we opened the door, the density of the air changed. A steamy, humid warmth enveloped my entire body.
Hot spring water steamed gently from the artificial stream inside.
And around that hot spring were creatures that seemed to embody all the world's tranquility condensed into one form.
Capybaras.
The largest living species of rodent.
Yet despite their size, they were known as the world's most docile and peaceful animals.
Slowly, leisurely.
Some soaked in the hot spring with their eyes closed, while others buried their faces in piles of freshly dried hay.
Even the ones walking moved without any sense of purpose. It felt like they walked simply because their feet moved.
"I've found a new master. A role model for all living beings."
If penguins were the emperors of doing nothing, and koalas the sages of laziness, then capybaras were peace itself. Living nonviolence, the incarnation of Gandhi.
Nyaang.
Nero approached a capybara lounging idly.
Even with the predator's arrival, the capybara didn't flinch. It just blinked once.
Nyaang.
As Nero meowed again, the surrounding capybaras turned their heads in unison, as if on cue.
Then, one by one, they began gathering around Nero.
A bizarre sight: a horde of giant hamsters surrounding a tiny tricolor cat.
Like subjects flocking to their king.
We found seats and settled in.
We ordered coffee and decided to spend some peaceful time watching the capybaras.
Then, one from the group approached me.
Thud.
It stared at me for a moment before plopping its head onto my lap without hesitation.
And just like that, it fell asleep in a comfortable position.
A heavy, warm sensation spread through my legs.
"Look at this, Seria. Animals know instinctively. They sense how peaceful and harmless I am. They've detected the nonviolent, non-resistant aura dwelling within me."
"Or maybe they realized the mayor's intelligence is on their level."
"Hey! What kind of talk is that? My intelligence at an animal's level?!"
"Capybaras are about as smart as dogs, they say. Isn't that about your level, sir?"
"That's harsh! I'm at least dolphin level!"
"Dolphins remember their own names. You can't even remember the titles of the documents you approved yesterday."
"Th-that's..."
Seria had ruined the mood again.
"Hmph. They wouldn't go to someone as cold as you. Capybaras like warm, kind people."
No sooner had I finished speaking than another capybara approached Seria.
It rested its head against her feet and settled into a comfortable pose.
A cold beauty paired with a warm animal.
Seria hesitated for a moment, then bent down to pick it up and cradle it.
So she does like animals.
Well, considering how she carries Nero around like that, it's no surprise.
"Oh my! You two look so great together! Want me to take a family photo for you?"
A cafe staff member had snuck up and was holding out a Polaroid camera.
"Ah, no! We're not, uh, family or anything."
I waved my hands in panic.
The staff member's eyes sparkled.
"Ah! You're a couple! I'll make it extra cute then! Look here! One, two, three!"
A couple?
Me and Seria?
I was speechless at the staff's innocent misunderstanding.
I should deny it, but I had no idea what to say.
I couldn't exactly go with, 'This person is actually an S-rank villain who could eliminate me anytime.'
"N-no, that's not..."
"Look here! Smile! One, two..."
"Wait, that's a misunderstanding..."
"Three!"
Click.
The photo was taken before I could stop it.
The Polaroid the staff showed me.
A capybara on my lap, one in Seria's arms, and us two standing awkwardly in between.
I was grinning awkwardly, and Seria was expressionless but somehow exuding a soft vibe.
And at our feet, Nero perched atop a capybara.
A peaceful family photo. Or maybe newlyweds...
No, what am I thinking?
I shook my head and looked away from the photo.
*
After finishing our zoo tour, we headed to the food court.
I ordered the king pork cutlet set, Seria got rose pasta.
Nero had the salmon special for cats.
Why do they even have that?
Is this a dystopia where cats are more respected than humans?
As we stepped out after eating, a sweet cinnamon scent hit my nose.
A churros stand.
"Three churros, please."
I ordered as if entranced. Freshly fried hot churros dusted generously with sugar and cinnamon powder came out.
We sat side by side on a nearby bench. I took a big bite of the churros.
Crispy, chewy, sweet. Stress melted away like snow.
"Sir, you have sugar on your mouth."
Seria, munching her churros next to me on the bench, pointed it out.
"Really?"
I roughly wiped the corner of my mouth with the back of my hand.
"No, the other side."
I wiped again, but Seria let out a small sigh.
"Stay still."
She pulled out a white handkerchief and leaned toward me.
Her delicate touch brushed my lips.
Whoosh. Her faint perfume wafted over.
Lilac? Freesia? No idea.
Anyway, it smelled nice.
Thump.
My heart acted strange.
Closer than I thought.
The soft feel of the handkerchief on my lips and her careful touch.
Thump.
Time seemed to stop.
The noisy kids' laughter, the distant animal cries—all faded into the distance.
Only her before my eyes.
Cold turquoise eyes.
Pinkish hair.
White hands.
That was the whole world.
'This is cheating.'
Coming in so suddenly like this is against the rules.
Nyaa?
Then Nero lifted its head and meowed, looking back and forth between us.
With that one sound, stopped time resumed.
I jolted back in surprise.
Seria folded the handkerchief and put it away as if nothing happened.
"There. You're not a kid anymore—why do you get so messy eating?"
"Wh-who wants to get messy?!"
I protested.
"Churros are supposed to be messy! The sugar flies everywhere! Cinnamon too! It's an act of God!"
"Then eat carefully."
"What's the point of careful churros?! Churros are meant to be devoured boldly, wildly, instinctively!"
I munched aggressively on the churros to hide my flushed face.
My ears burned. My neck too.
Definitely the heat from the fresh churros spreading through me. Yeah, that's it.
*
Time to head home.
But we couldn't just leave empty-handed.
Every journey deserves a proper souvenir.
Perceval's quest ended with the Holy Grail, and my zoo pilgrimage needed mementos!
At the zoo exit, capitalism's final trap: the gift shop.
The moment I opened the door.
"Ooh...!"
My eyes spun.
Penguin cushions, penguin mugs, penguin slippers, penguin keychains, penguin magnets. Penguin T-shirts...
I swept every penguin in sight into the cart.
"This penguin cushion too, that penguin mug. Ah, these penguin slippers are a must! Perfect for the bathroom at home!"
My spree halted before the extra-large Edward penguin plush. The price tag read a wicked 150,000 won.
"Edward... Our friendship is worth more than 150,000 won. No, priceless. You taught me the truth of life."
I solemnly loaded the plush into the cart.
Then Nero jumped from the cart onto a display shelf.
Myaaong—
It scanned around before charging at a tiger plush bigger than itself, biting its scruff, and dragging it down.
"Oh? You like tigers?"
Ignoring my question, Nero climbed atop the fallen plush and pressed its paw on its chest.
The conqueror's pose. A bold claim on the spoils from the tiger it subdued that morning.
"A symbol of lust for power. Just like you, sir."
Seria said quietly.
In the end, my cart brimmed with penguin merch and the tiger plush. The cashier scanned briskly.
"Total is 332,000 won."
"Here."
I casually pulled out the corporate card from my wallet.
"Receipt processing..."
"Sir."
Seria's cold voice cut me off.
"Personal purchases go on your personal card."
"What? This includes official mascot Nero's items! It's an extension of work!"
I pointed at the tiger plush in defense.
"How is a tiger plush work-related?"
"Nero's the symbol of Neo Incheon! This is ceremonial expense for upholding dignity!"
"No."
Seria stared me down. Her eyes screamed, 'Keep babbling and you won't make it home tonight.'
I grudgingly pulled out my personal card.
Sob sob... My hard-earned money... 332,000 won....
Then the cashier spotted Nero and her eyes lit up.
"Oh! It's Nyangfluencer Nero! So much cuter in person! We'll give 50% off on the item Nero picked!"
The tiger plush price halved instantly.
"What about me? I'm the mayor! No mayor discount?"
The cashier smiled kindly at me.
"Ah, sir, you get the standard member 3% off."
Just 3%??
Better than nothing...
Nyanyanya.
Once paid, Nero wagged its tail triumphantly, prize in mouth.
*
The back seat of the official car turned into a squishy penguin empire.
Big and small penguin plushes pressed against me from all sides.
Penguin cushion on the left, penguin neck pillow on the right—crushing me.
Like a castaway assaulted by a penguin horde in Antarctica.
Meanwhile, next to me.
Grrr.
Nero kneaded contentedly atop the tiger plush.
Today's true victor.
"Haa..."
Seria sighed softly.
"This is why outings with kids are tough."
I flinched.
"Who's a kid?!"
My reflexive retort.
"When did I say you? I meant Nero. Causing trouble all day, tantruming for toys, now sleeping satisfied. The picture of a child."
"......"
Felt like it included me.
Couldn't argue. My actions today were pure childishness.
Fangirling over penguins, scarfing churros, losing it in the gift shop.
Elementary school weekend vibes to anyone watching.
I kept my mouth shut until we reached home. No choice but to admit defeat.
The car stopped.
Home.
As I grabbed the penguin haul to get out.
"Sir."
A voice halted me.
Turning, Seria approached and handed me a small box.
"Here."
"What's this?"
Inside was a palm-sized penguin ornament, sparkling iridescently under the light—crystal maybe?
"What? For me?"
Seria giving me a gift? A T-astal penguin no less?
As unreal as a polar bear sharing fish with a penguin.
With her usual impassive face, she said,
"It'd suit your desk. So you can sit still like a penguin and work properly."
"......"
There she goes again.
Dropping lines that could be compliments or insults without a care.
That talent to ruin moments.
Still, a corner of my heart tickled. Amid teasing me all day, she thought to buy this.
If she weren't the leader of a secret society plotting world conquest. If no dark nature hid behind that beautiful face. If she weren't a dangerous being who could erase me anytime...
I might've fallen for her dozens of times today.
"Thanks."
The reddening evening sky felt strangely unfamiliar.
That night.
My penthouse.
Center of the sofa: extra-large Edward penguin plush in seiza.
Table: ranks of big and small penguin figures.
Nero sprawled on the tiger plush instead of the sofa, watching TV.
I, in penguin slippers, sipped warm milk from a penguin mug, gazing contentedly.
Perfect.
This was my dream weekend night.
Time to do nothing.
Then I turned on my smartphone.
Checked real-time trends and headlines.
[Neo Incheon Mayor Spotted at Zoo on Weekend! Humble Everyman Steps Trend]
[From Penguins to Capybaras... Lee Garam's Charm Captures Animals' Hearts Too]
[Shock! Neo Incheon Mascot Nero Subdues Tiger... Crowned Strongest Cat]
"Haa..."
Impossible to live like a penguin, huh.
I just wanted to do nothing like one, but the world won't let me.
I can't be a penguin. I'm Lee Garam.
The weary mayor of this damn Neo Incheon.
"Nero."
Nya?
"Let's be reborn as penguins next life."
The following Monday.
The mayor's office was a warzone again.
Desk piled with approval docs that built up while I enjoyed weekend peace, pressuring me.
I placed the penguin ornament front and center.
'So you can sit still like a penguin and work properly.'
It sparkled as if mocking me.
No. Can't crumble now.
My goal: one. Safe impeachment and swift escape.
Time for a new plan.
All my failures paradoxically boosted my approval ratings.
Especially solid among youth, the core MIGA fan club base.
Target clear now.
My main supporters: 20s-30s youth.
Need to turn their backs.
Resolved, I opened the search bar.
'Traits of today's 20s'
[Analysis Report] When Youth Call You 'Boomer' - 7 Triggers of Generational Conflict
[Issue Briefing] Real Reason 2030s Are Angry - Hypocrisy Scares More Than Abuse of Power
[Economic Institute] 7 in 10 Youth: "No Class Mobility No Matter How Hard You Try"
[Media Critique] Youth Tired of 'X-chung' Framing - "We're People Too"
A flood of analyses and articles.
"Fairness. The keyword is fairness."
They were hypersensitive to it above all.
Transparent processes, just outcomes. They raged at even minor privileges or cheats.
Youth anger switch: fairness.
Solution simple.
Openly flaunt unfair privileges while praising boomer greatness.