Chapter 99: Exclusive Pussy vs Lewd Pussy (3)[R-18]
Translator: RaidenTL
Chapter 99: Exclusive Pussy vs Lewd Pussy (3)[R-18]
Gurgle—
"I'm hungry... I want chicken..."
Poporing Spayria let out a deep sigh as she stared up at the ceiling of the Porling Merchant Guild.
Her shop was already in a terrible location, but ever since Red Rose Commerce started their special discount event in honor of Lady Ellis Day, her customer base had plummeted by seventy percent.
"Seriously... Red Rose's products are at least two grades lower in quality than mine... The things I make are masterpieces... This month's rent is... ugh..."
Her head began to throb at the thought of her one-room apartment, which cost a 5-million Eris deposit and 450,000 Eris in monthly rent (deposit fully depleted, rent two months overdue).
Last month, she had barely managed to scrape the rent together by selling a vibrator, but it looked like she wouldn't be able to make it this month.
[DieDieDieDieDieYouBitchDie][0]
[This is fucking legendary lmao][3]
[Unnie, do you want to see me go crazy?][1]
[First time seeing this, what is this trash food called Cucumber Tanghulu?][11]
[Outfit only pure virgins wear.jpg][5]
[Incest freaks out lol][4]
"Even a genius like me is suffering!! Why do these idiots look like they're enjoying life so much!! Should I fire up the VPN?"
Poporing opened the Gallery for a bit of escapism, considering a quick bout of spamming, but then stopped herself.
She didn't know when her next meal would be, so she had to conserve as much energy as possible.
[MojitoDelivery■]
This was the fixed nickname Poporing used, but in reality, it was just one of her Thousand Masks.
"Sigh..."
Was it even possible that Poporing—the 'Prodigy of the Gallery,' one of the 'Three Great Villains,' and the one known as the 'Dark Emperor'—was on the verge of being evicted because she couldn't pay the rent for a tiny one-room flat?
Springing up!
"O Heavens!!! Why!! Must I!! Still live like this!! If you gave me talent, you should have given me a world that recognizes it!!! Otherwise, how is a genius like me supposed to survive!!!"
They say prophets are stoned, but she felt a bitter sense of injustice toward a world that failed to recognize an artificer who would surely leave her mark on history.
What use would it be if, after she died, people discovered her research and praised her as the 'Great Poporing'?
Rather than gaining fame after death, Poporing wanted to eat her fill of chicken right now.
"Is this really where my life ends..."
Poporing muttered as she looked at a jar sitting in the corner of the shop.
Wriggle— wriggle—
Poporing was certain that the moment the contents of that jar were commercialized, the history of 'Magical Engineering' would take a massive leap forward.
"Dammit... Who evicts someone just for being two... no, three months behind on rent..."
The economy is cold.
And the landlord was just as cold.
To tell her to move out just because she was three months behind!
If she got kicked out of her room, would she have to eat and sleep in this cramped shop from now on?
"If only I had just a little more time and budget..."
Just as tears of sorrow were about to fall over how her life had turned out—
SLAM—!!
"Hi—Hieek!"
"It's here! I bought it here!!"
The shop door swung open violently, and a beautiful blonde girl she had never seen before stormed inside.
"You remember me, right??"
"Hi, hieeeek!!... I... I don't know... Wh-wh-who are you?"
"Hey!! Why don't you remember!! It's me!"
"Ugh!... I-I'm sorry... I was wrong... P-please... don't scream... sniff..."
The blonde girl, who clearly looked like a popular socialite and had a booming voice, was a terrible match for Poporing.
Just being near her made Poporing feel like she had committed a crime...
'Wh-who is she? Seriously... I've never seen her before.... C-could she be... here to shake me down for money?'
But Poporing didn't have a single cent to her name.
"Seriously, why!! I bought the Orc Estrus Potion here not long ago!!"
"O-Orc Estrus Potion?"
"Yeah!!"
At the blonde girl's words, Poporing searched her memory.
It was an Orc Estrus Potion she had made for breeding on farms, but because the effect was too powerful and the price was high, it wasn't a product that sold often.
'If it's the Orc Estrus Potion... the... the last time I sold it was... Ah!'
Recalling the memory, Poporing asked cautiously.
"A-a-are you... the... the customer who... came in with her face all wrapped up... and... b-bought the Orc Estrus Potion and... Sleepwort?"
"Ah! Right!! That!! That was me!!"
She had never imagined that customer and this blonde girl were the same person.
'...P-p-please... give me... one... O-Orc... Estrus Potion.... Give me the Sleepwort... t-too.'
The customer who had bought the aphrodisiac had kept her voice very low and had stuttered significantly.
"Ugh... I... well... the... the period has passed... so... a r-refund... isn't possible..."
"Huh? What? I can't hear you!"
"Hieek... N-no... I'll... I'll give you a refund... sniff..."
Poporing pulled out the emergency cash she had hidden under the counter.
'Bye-bye, my beautiful... emergency fund...'
She had vowed not to touch it until she was literally starving to death, but she didn't have the confidence to endure the blonde girl's gaze.
"Refund? What are you talking about all of a sudden? Refund for what?"
"Huh? D-didn't you c-come for a refund?"
"What are you talking about! I already used it all! The effect was great!! More importantly, you see? I told you I wasn't lying!!"
Spin!
The blonde girl turned around and pointed at the man in her group.
'...Eh? That person?'
Poporing's eyes widened.
There was no way someone that handsome could be common.
It was definitely the same man who had come by last time to buy a vibrator.
"This bastard took my virginity!!!! Fuck!!!"
"...."
"...."
"...."
"...."
"...."
How on earth was one supposed to handle this atmosphere?
After Evelyn finished her last sentence, no one in the shop could open their mouth.
"......Yeah, I'm gonna go kill myself!"
A moment later, as if Evelyn's frozen mind had returned, she spoke with a bright smile.
"Calm down, Evelyn."
"Let go, Ian!! I don't have the confidence to live anymore!!"
"How am I supposed to live without you?"
"Then you should have stopped me!! You should have stopped me before I did something this crazy!!"
"I did stop you!!"
But wasn't it Evelyn who had insisted on coming all this way just to show him a witness?
"....Well, I guess that could happen, Evelyn. By the way, this is my first time in a shop like this! This is an 'Artificer's Shop,' right?"
"Y-yes!... To be precise, it's not exactly an artificer's shop, more like a general store... A-anyway... I... sell... v-various... things..."
"Wow! What's this? Is it a club?"
"...."
Lady Yuris asked as she pulled out a 'Vibrating Massager' that anyone could see was intended for that purpose.
"Ah!... It's... a v-vibrating... m-massager... It's... something... I... use... when my shoulders are stiff... It's... w-waterproof... and... v-very sturdy!... The vibration intensity... can be adjusted... up to 12 levels..."
"How much is that?"
Thinking it would be useful to have, I asked for the price.
"Well... it's 500,000 E-eris..."
"...."
Just like the vibrator from last time, it was surprisingly expensive.
Based on the price, it felt like it should be sold in a luxury boutique rather than a small shop like this.
"A-ah, no!! B-but!! I-if you buy it now, I'll give you a special d-discount!"
The shopkeeper seemed to notice my expression and was visibly flustered.
"How much?"
"250,000... no, 200,000 Eris!"
With just one word, the 500,000 Eris price tag dropped to less than half.
"P-please... buy it... sniff... I... really... only sell... good things.... If I can't sell this... I'll... be kicked out of my house... hic..."
"What?"
"Ugh... I'm... only three months behind on r-rent... hic... but they're kicking me out."
"Oh dear... Being kicked out is so heartbreaking. If you have nowhere to go later, please come find the nearby Church of Ellis..."
I couldn't help but think that if she was three months behind on rent, it wasn't so much being kicked out as it was the landlord being patient for three months...
"...I'll take one massager."
"A-ah, th-thank you!!"
Anyway, since I got the discount, I bought one.
Rattle—! Rattle—!
"Huh?... This jar is moving? Something must be trapped inside?"
"Hic!... A-ah, wait... Th-that... if you open it... hieek!!"
Clack—!
Evelyn, who had opened the lid of the jar, frowned.
"What's this? A slime? It's a demonic beast, isn't it? ...Isn't it dangerous?"
"N-no!... It's... r-really... s-safe... It looks like a slime... but it's actually not a slime, so to speak... I extracted and cultured only the properties of a slime... and used a special process to... blah blah blah..."
The shopkeeper explained fervently, but honestly, I couldn't understand half of it.
"So, what is this actually used for?"
"...Ah.... Well.... For the... gate..."
"What?"
"I... I mean... the anus...."
At Evelyn's question, the shopkeeper bit her lip and answered.
"When you're adventuring... or traveling long distances... the bathroom... is a problem... At those times... if you keep it... inside the anus.... it can... clean the inside of the bowels... It doesn't feel... very intrusive... and..."
"I'll buy it. How much?"
"H-huh? Th-that... it's still... unfinished... so... right now..."
"When will it be finished?"
"Well... I... lack the time and funds... so I'm not sure yet..."
"Um... then, what is this used for?"
What Lady Yuris pulled out was a very thin, transparent glove.
"Eh?... I... I recalled all of those... Wh-where did you find that?"
"It was over there in the corner."
"Ugh... I must have... missed one... Th-that too... was made from slime material... Originally, it was a glove made for restaurant supply...?"
As if remembering that time, the shopkeeper's eyes welled up with tears.
"The restaurant owner... asked for a glove that was as thin and comfortable as possible while still being sturdy... so I made it exactly as ordered... but he said I made it too thin... and complained that it felt no different from not wearing anything at all, then unilaterally canceled the contract... sniff... It's so unfair... It... cost so much... to make... and... it's a really sturdy glove that won't tear unless you cut it with a saw... hic... If it weren't for that, I wouldn't be worrying about food like this..."
Slide—
"Holy shit!!! It really feels like I'm not wearing anything?!"
At that moment, Evelyn, who had put the glove on and touched my cheek, shouted in surprise.
"Hi, hieek... I-I'm sorry! I'm sorry! For being so forward! I'm sorry!!"
"No, what did I even do... it was just an exclamation... But do you have any of that material left?"
"Y-yes.... I... received a supply request... but it was unilaterally canceled... sniff..."
"Hmm... Then, for now, the thinness and texture pass... and this really doesn't tear, right?"
"Yes... r-really... it doesn't tear... You... can... t-test it if you want..."
"Then I'm going to pull it, okay?"
Streeeeeetch—!!
At the shopkeeper's words, Evelyn pulled the glove until it stretched nearly three times its size, but it didn't look like it would tear at all.
"Wow, it's true. I like it."
"Eh? I-if you like it... th-then maybe... c-could you... buy just one... I'll give it to you for... s-specially for 20,000 Eris..."
"You want me to pay 20,000 for this? It's fucking useless as a glove. It's not pretty, and the practicality is no different from not wearing one, right?"
"Ugh... hic... sob... Y-you're right... hic..."
"Hey... Evelyn, the shopkeeper is about to cry..."
Honestly, it was the truth...
But the truth always hurts more.
"No, I didn't mean to make her cry. It's useless as a glove, but it's fucking useful for something else, isn't it?"
While I was wondering what on earth she intended to use it for, Evelyn asked the shopkeeper.
"Can you make condoms with this material?"