Qi
Myeongsuk seemed to hold regular meetings with the people of the Seongyodan. According to her, their influence was truly immense and of enormous help in spreading the faith. Her design, as she described it, was for them to place missionaries beneath themselves, who in turn would place other missionaries under them. It struck me as a complete pyramid.
Myeongsuk occasionally arranged meetings between me and the various missionaries. I had time to burn, yet she always spoke as if carving those hours out of her schedule were a tremendous ordeal. At those meetings, all I really did was listen to them boast of their exploits and ask them to keep up the good work.
And then…
There was the matter of Jeongmi. Jeongmi came to see me almost every day, entering my room naked alongside Yunchae and sitting at my side for the entire day. She performed every trivial errand I required. The arrogant smile she had worn on that first day was gone; she had transformed into something more than a faithful housekeeper. From the day she began residing in my room, Yunchae sat with her as well.
At first I found it extremely awkward, but after a day or two I simply grew used to it. The difference between Yunchae and Jeongmi was that Jeongmi went home in the evenings. As I mentioned before, my days were quite idle, so at first I passed the time with games or books, but more and more often I found myself talking and playing with Yunchae and Jeongmi. Even when my hand happened to brush against their bodies, they never pulled away, and as I began to enjoy it, I started touching them more deliberately. With Yunchae it was only natural—we already slept together—but when I laid a hand on Jeongmi’s body, her slightly exaggerated reactions proved rather entertaining in their own right.
One day, after Jeongmi had left, Yunchae nestled in my arms and spoke.
“If you want to hold Jeongmi, hold her.”
When I looked at her face, Yunchae said with an expressionless look,
“She seemed to be waiting for Jisin’s touch.”
I laughed and said half-jokingly,
“Why would you say that? Doesn’t it make you jealous?”
Yunchae shook her head.
“Not at all. Normally it seems like you hold back because you’re watching my reaction, even when you want to. You don’t need to. While you’re here, think of me and Jeongmi as your subordinates and make yourself comfortable. There’s no need for manners or consent. Just act according to your will as Jisin. You don’t need to overthink it.”
To be honest, I had been quietly wanting to put my hands on Jeongmi’s body. Wasn’t that only natural for a man? If a man felt no interest in a woman who spent the entire day naked in front of him, what else could he be but a eunuch? I didn’t say as much to Yunchae outright, but I had already made up my mind to do so.
A few days later, Yunchae went out during the day on personal business. I was alone in the room with Jeongmi. Feeling a little restless, I decided to go for a walk outside. Jeongmi said she would get ready, went into the preparation room, and reappeared wearing a robe similar to mine. We headed out.
People were only rarely visible inside the building, and when they saw me they bowed their heads in greeting. Jeongmi and I stepped outside. It was still late summer, yet a chilly wind was blowing. I looked toward where Ganghajeong stood and walked in that direction. But something was under construction beside it. Of course the land was part of this property, but this was the first I had heard of anything being built outside the main building.
“Do you know what they’re building over there?”
Jeongmi looked where I was pointing and said,
“I heard they’re building a private villa for Jisin to reside in. Haven’t you heard?”
A place for me to stay? This was the first I was hearing of it. I went to Yongjin’s office on the first floor to ask him. Yongjin wasn’t at his desk. I returned to my room and called him. He didn’t answer, and a message came saying he was in a meeting and would contact me later. As I set down the phone, Jeongmi spoke.
“I heard they’re making Jisin’s sacred residence. There will be living quarters for the servants there as well, so I’m waiting for it to be finished. Then I’ll move in and live here.”
I turned to look at her.
“Sacred residence?”
Jeongmi’s eyes sparkled with a smile I hadn’t seen from her lately.
“Yes. We’re going to create a paradise. My aunt and I. There, Jisin will bestow grace upon the people.”
What was she talking about now? When I looked bewildered, Jeongmi removed the robe she was wearing. Then she said to me,
“Yunchae isn’t here today, so would you hold me a little? I’ve been waiting for Jisin’s touch so long that cobwebs have formed.”
Cobwebs? Where? Jeongmi approached and slowly removed my robe. Looking straight into my eyes, she said,
“She said a cult leader must be like a cult leader. A religion whose people feel no awe toward their leader loses its center.”
That was true enough. Myeongsuk, who had seemed like nothing more than a market auntie, was truly an inscrutable being. I never imagined she thought that far. Of course I fully agreed with her words, yet knowing I myself was the subject left me both embarrassed and uncomfortable. It was a little different from the mindset I’d had when I started all this.
Jeongmi stroked the area around my now-naked manhood with her hand. I had vaguely expected a moment like this would come, so I wasn’t particularly surprised. Her appearance carried the maturity of a woman over forty. Jeongmi stroked my thighs, pelvis, and stomach, but never actually touched my cock. I didn’t think she necessarily had the right answer, but I asked anyway.
“What does a cult leader’s sacred atmosphere have to do with this kind of act?”
Honestly, it was a question to break the awkward atmosphere. But Jeongmi looked up at me with a very serious face and said,
“Dominance. Dominance. Jisin must completely dominate his surroundings. From what I can see, you’re not dominating Yunchae—she’s the one being dominated. Even if the situation is manufactured, you need to become a cult leader who completely dominates everything around him.”
The smile vanished from my face. Jeongmi continued.
“Shall I be honest? When I first saw Jisin at the gathering, I was shocked. I’d heard about you from my aunt, but I wondered if there really existed a person who could dominate people’s hearts like that. Afterward, when I was ordered by my aunt to come see you, I was so full of anticipation. But…”
When the first half of a conversation is praise and then comes a “but,” what follows is a plunge into the abyss. I clenched my molars and steeled myself.
“The Jisin I saw up close was a disappointment. There was no charisma, no overwhelming qi that overpowered people. Of course I’d been given orders and was supposed to assist you, so it didn’t matter to me, but if other people meet you and don’t feel that overwhelming energy, how could they think of you as their savior?”
She was a woman who giggled with vulgar smiles, yet I found her speech logical and composed. In truth, she was right. I myself knew I wasn’t someone who possessed that kind of forceful presence.
“Isn’t that kind of qi something you’re born with? How do you force something that isn’t there?”
Jeongmi put on that vulgar smile again and rose from the floor. Taking my hand and leading me toward the bed, she said,
“Qigong… the thing is, people believe it actually exists, but it’s not something scientifically proven. That’s why you can’t conclude it’s innate either. When we say someone ‘has qi that overwhelms others,’ that person possesses various factors that make it so. External ones like a massive physique or a terrifyingly fierce face, and also things like speech patterns and body language—those are the elements that create a person’s qi.”
Jeongmi lightly pushed me to sit on the bed and sat beside me herself.
“When you actually converse, Jisin’s true value does come through. Your tone of voice, your volume—everything perfectly draws people’s attention. And without realizing it, they find themselves agreeing with your words and opening their hearts. From what I can see, you don’t seem aware of that quality in yourself at all.”
Jeongmi lightly stroked my thigh. It was strange. It was more stimulating than if she had actually grabbed, stroked, and sucked my cock. My limp manhood was slowly lifting its head.
“So what are you trying to say?”
I said with a somewhat curt tone.
“As you are now, Jisin is nothing more than a nice young man who’s good at talking. With that kind of young man’s image, you can’t be the center of an organization like Cheonsiman-gyo. That unknown aura that overwhelms people… you don’t have it. Even if it’s forced, even if it’s fake, you have to create it to succeed.”