Chapter 155: Clown Union Club 2
Translator: RaidenTL
Chapter 155: Clown Union Club 2
The final day of the club trial period arrived before I knew it.
Time is a fickle thing; it feels incredibly fast one moment and agonizingly slow the next. The hard and painful times drag on, while the joyful and happy moments fly by in an instant.
If time felt like it was flying during my stay with the Disciplinary Committee, I suppose that means I was just that content.
Honestly, it would be easier to just join the Disciplinary Committee. The people are nice, and Johanna is cute.
But while living comfortably is good, living happily is better. And for me to be happy, the people around me have to be happy first. So, as much as it stings, I have to leave the Disciplinary Committee and form the club I want.
"What are you spacing out for? How do you expect to protect Lady Johanna like that?"
"As far as I recall, my role isn't to be Senior Johanna’s bodyguard, but to patrol the Academy grounds with her."
I was currently in the Disciplinary Committee room.
Normally, we would start our patrol as soon as morning training with Johanna ended. However, Johanna said she had something to grab from the dormitory today, so I was waiting here for her.
The ones currently directing intense gazes—99% killing intent, 1% jealousy—at me were the other members of the Disciplinary Committee.
"Obviously, if Lady Johanna is in even the slightest bit of danger during that process, you should be prepared to lay down your life for her!"
"Exactly, exactly!"
"You know what happens if Lady Johanna gets even a scratch, right?"
"That day becomes the date of your funeral."
The current Disciplinary Committee of the Academy had two distinct characteristics. One, they were all hardcore fans of Johanna. Two, they were all female. It wasn't that the committee only accepted women, but somehow it had ended up being composed entirely of girls.
"But Senior Johanna is stronger than me. Wouldn't it make more sense for her to protect me?"
Upon hearing my words, one committee member looked at me with an expression usually reserved for a fruit fly hovering over three-month-old trash.
"It’s a joke, a joke. A lighthearted jest to melt the stiff atmosphere—what professionals call 'ice-breaking.' Wasn't it funny?"
""It wasn't funny at all!"" they shouted in unison.
Seeing as they didn't laugh at my joke, they clearly have very peculiar tastes.
"Hey. Why don't you just stay in the Disciplinary Committee even after the trial period ends? Honestly, we have more work than most other clubs, but the benefits are great, and it’ll be a huge help after graduation."
"Do you guys like me that much?"
Thwack!
I got smacked by a committee member for that one comment.
"Ack! That’s so mean. Sniff, sniff. It was just a little prank."
I pretended to cry out of sorrow, but the committee members didn't fall for it. To think they wouldn't be fooled by my masterpiece-level acting... as expected of the Disciplinary Committee.
"How dare you play such a prank when Lady Johanna is right there?"
"You don't even know how lucky you are. You need a good beating."
While I was busy filming a WWE match with the committee members...
Click.
The door to the committee room opened without a knock. No knock meant it was a member, and there was only one member not currently in the room.
Her platinum blonde hair was tied up for ease of movement. Johanna, looking at me with her sapphire blue eyes, blushed. She opened and closed her mouth several times as if embarrassed before finally speaking.
"......Oppa."
"Uwaaaaaagh!"
I let out a bizarre sound and collapsed onto the floor.
What terrifying destructive power. Making that my wish was truly the best choice of my life. It wasn't the first time she had called me 'Oppa,' but seeing Johanna still acting so shy about it made me wonder if this was the Academy or Utopia.
".................."
The committee members glared at me with icy expressions, but I didn't care.
What are you guys gonna do about it? Johanna calls me 'Oppa'—what can you do?
Whoa, whoa! Wait a second. Put the weapons down. Wait, why are you guys starting magic incantations right now?
This is bad. I need to get out of here as fast as possible.
Judging that staying here might turn the last day of my club experience into the last day of my life, I hurried out of the room with Johanna. Of course, being a well-mannered gentleman, I didn't forget to wave a grand goodbye before leaving.
"The trial period ends today, but I'll come back to visit later~!"
When I waved and spoke, the committee members responded kindly.
""Don't come back!""
Man, how harsh.
Johanna followed my lead and timidly raised her hand to her chest, waving at the committee members.
"....I'll be back."
"Yes!"
"Have a safe trip!"
"If anything happens, call us immediately!"
"Leave the interior of the Academy to us!"
I looked at Johanna and waved once more.
"I'll be back too!"
"Not you!"
"Hahahaha!"
""Hey!""
Ignoring the enthusiastic "cheers" of the committee members, I headed outside the Academy with Johanna. Those people really give the best reactions.
* * *
The task assigned to Johanna and me was the exterior patrol of the Academy.
We patrolled every weekday, but nothing special ever really happened. In the first place, if incidents occurred frequently, they wouldn't have sent just the two of us on the exterior patrol. This wasn't some back alley; it was the Imperial Capital.
There were occasional minor shouting matches, but nothing serious enough for the Disciplinary Committee to intervene.
If we meddle in every little thing, people won't look at the committee very kindly.
The Disciplinary Committee only intervened when it looked like things would escalate if left alone. And even if a problem did arise, I had Johanna by my side.
The Academy might pursue equality, but we were currently outside its walls. In other words, social status carried weight here. With Johanna, the daughter of Duke Freya, present, people who were cursing each other's ancestors just moments ago would suddenly become the best of friends.
Of course, Johanna didn't go around ruining people just because she was annoyed, but for commoners, the best policy was to avoid involvement with high nobility altogether.
Getting on the bad side of a Ducal family while fighting vs. just making up for now. As long as they were capable of rational thought, everyone would choose the latter.
And if there was someone stupid enough to pick a fight with Johanna? Then they’d have to answer to me.
In conclusion, what Johanna and I were doing was closer to a stroll than a patrol. We were walking around the neighborhood while chatting and buying street food.
Noticing Johanna staring at a grilled skewer stall, I spoke up first.
"Shall we get some skewers today too?"
"....I keep telling you, we shouldn't eat while on patrol—"
"Oh, come on. You've never turned them down once I've bought them. Please wait here a moment. I'll go grab them quickly."
I approached the skewer stall, ordered the usual, and chatted with the owner.
"Hard at work on patrol as always, I see."
"And you're hard at work making these delicious skewers as always, sir."
Since I bought skewers here every time we patrolled, I had become quite friendly with the owner.
"Here! I threw in a few extra as a special service. Enjoy."
"Oh! Thank you. But is it okay to give away so much? If you go bankrupt, I'll lose my favorite shop."
"Khahaha! It’s fine. You’re a regular. I’ll just sell them for more to other people."
"That’s a bit much."
Having bought the skewers, I walked around eating them with Johanna.
To be honest, I hadn't ruled out the idea of having Johanna join the club I was going to form. I wanted to be with her, and having her join would certainly help my plans.
But during the Disciplinary Committee trial period, I changed my mind. Though they were a bit extreme, all the committee members truly cherished Johanna. And I could tell that Johanna, though she didn't show it much on the surface, cherished them as well.
I can't interfere with Johanna's school life just for my own personal greed.
As we walked down the street with skewers in hand, Johanna spoke first.
"....It ends today."
I knew what she meant without her having to specify. She meant that these patrols together were coming to an end. There was a faint trace of regret in Johanna's voice.
"Ends today? What a sad thing to say. Sniff! Are you throwing me away now that you've had your fun with me?"
The club trial period was indeed ending today, and tomorrow I would be forming my own club. But I had no intention of ending these patrols today.
At my words, Johanna looked at me with eyes filled with a small spark of hope.
"Are you not leaving the club?"
"That’s not it!"
".............."
"But! While patrolling the inside of the Academy is hard, we can just keep doing these morning exterior patrols together."
".....Academy patrols are the duty of the Disciplinary Committee."
"Ayy~ it’s fine. If anyone complains, I’ll just say I went out for a morning stroll and happened to run into you, and it just so happened that your patrol route and my walking path were the same."
It was blatant sophistry, but it was fine. If anyone tried to nitpick, I’d just have a "conversation" with them while holding a bomb and a flash grenade; that usually solved everything.
Johanna stared at me in silence. Was she surprised by my perfect logic?
"......You should call me Noona, not Senior."
Then she continued in a small voice, with a tiny smile playing on her lips.
"Oppa."
I clutched my heart and collapsed right there in the middle of the market.