5
## Chapter 5
Kang I-yul smiled awkwardly.
“……Ah. I already had a hairstyle in mind.”
‘Yeah. That damn shaggy-dog hair, right?’
I-yul.
I really like you, but that hair is seriously not it.
Without the slightest hesitation, I drove the point home.
“Black hair suits you best.”
Since I'd already said it, I had no choice but to see it through to the end.
Kang I-yul stared at me.
His face was filled with pure bewilderment.
“……Why?”
“Because you're handsome.”
Silence fell again.
This time, it lasted a little longer.
I heard someone mutter, “Crazy.”
“……Ah.”
The tips of Kang I-yul's ears slowly turned red.
‘He's still weak to compliments.’
“Don't cover up a handsome face by dyeing your hair for no reason.”
Kang I-yul opened his mouth, then closed it again.
He looked like he was carefully choosing his words.
“No, but why are you saying that to me—”
“You asked me earlier.”
I calmly shot back.
“You said, ‘Should I dye it?’”
“That was just me talking to myself—”
“So I answered you.”
Kang I-yul stared at me, completely speechless.
‘Well? What are you going to do about it?’
As Yoo Seong-ah always said, life was all about momentum.
“No, but you're suddenly saying something weird—”
“What is?”
“That you're handsome?”
“…….”
I shrugged.
“If you're handsome, I call you handsome. What else am I supposed to say?”
Behind us, things had descended into complete chaos.
Having come this far, there was no way I could back down now.
Kang I-yul ran a hand over his face.
“……Ha.”
He laughed as though he couldn't believe me, but he didn't seem to dislike it.
This was it.
The perfect time to push a little further.
“And how about growing your bangs out a little?”
I intended to take advantage of the confusion and go all the way.
“Longer?”
“Yes. So that a little bit of your forehead shows.”
Before my regression, Kang I-yul's visual evaluations had improved as the survival show progressed.
It was because his hair had grown out.
The hairstyle everyone else teased him for looking like mussels somehow suited I-yul perfectly.
‘It looked incredible flying around onstage.’
As if on cue, the designer nodded.
“That sounds good.”
“Really?”
“Your forehead and face shape are both nice, so I think it'll really bring out your overall vibe.”
With the designer joining in, I-yul began to look genuinely conflicted.
‘He's coming around…… He's coming around…….’
“……Let's do that.”
“Got it!”
……A cheer escaped my mouth before I could stop it.
But at this point, there was no point being embarrassed anymore.
“Wow—”
When Kang I-yul finished his hair, he let out a quiet exclamation.
Before my regression, Kang I-yul had come out with shaggy brown hair resembling a fluffy dog.
Of course, he was handsome even with that hairstyle.
But black hair was definitely different.
It completely changed his vibe.
‘Yeah. A mussel hairstyle should obviously be black.’
“I never even considered a hairstyle like this.”
Then he hesitated for a moment before looking at me.
“……Thank you.”
More pleasing than those words, however, was his hands.
He had clasped both hands together as though praying.
It was a habit he had whenever he was genuinely happy or excited.
For some reason, my chest tightened at the sight.
While I-yul briefly stepped away, the designer spoke to me.
“For someone who's being thanked, you're awfully……”
“Yes?”
“Your reaction is surprisingly calm.”
What was she talking about?
Our I-yul had practically looked like he was about to fly into the sky just now.
He'd nearly sprouted puppy ears on top of his head.
“He's actually really happy right now.”
“Really?”
“Yes.”
“How do you know?”
I smiled instead of answering.
After three years of being a devoted Kang I-yul fan, I could tell at a glance.
---
The makeover continued with makeup.
“Heh—”
The ticklish brush strokes drew suppressed laughter from here and there.
Everyone had their lips tightly pursed, awkward under the unfamiliar touch, and it was amusing to watch.
As soon as all the preparations were finished, the staff quickly packed up their equipment.
“We'll head straight to the profile shoot.”
‘Wow, they're really going all out.’
I could feel the company's intense determination to squeeze every last drop of value out of this.
‘Well, it makes sense. We've already spent several hours just getting twenty people ready.’
……It was an entirely reasonable decision.
When we arrived at the studio, I took a moment to catch my breath.
‘I-yul's first profile shoot!’
It was a moment I'd never even imagined before my regression.
I could actually watch my favorite's “beginning” from right beside him.
My heart was beating for no reason.
Everyone changed into the same outfit in the waiting room.
A white T-shirt and jeans.
That was also the biggest reason I'd insisted on black hair.
Han Sang-yoon, the senior trainee who had been at Nix Entertainment the longest, was the first to shoot.
Which meant I would be last.
‘This is going to take forever.’
Of course, there was one good thing.
I-yul's turn came fairly quickly.
The moment I-yul, fully styled, stepped into the studio—
Click.
The photographer instinctively pressed the shutter.
He hadn't even posed yet.
“Wow—”
The brief exclamation rang out louder than expected.
Murmurs spread around the room.
Long bangs.
A little bit of forehead showing.
Nothing was excessive, yet he immediately drew the eye.
The understated styling actually made his naturally striking face stand out even more.
The photographer smiled as he looked at the camera's display.
“This is already an A-cut.”
“Are you really a trainee? You look incredible on camera.”
The staff began nodding one after another.
“The styling suits him so well, too.”
With compliments pouring in, Kang I-yul shyly clasped his hands together.
I silently cheered as I watched him.
‘Yeah. This is right.’
A face like this deserved this kind of reaction.
Before my regression, Kang I-yul had always received ambiguous evaluations during the early stages of the survival show.
-He's handsome, but is he really handsome enough to make a fuss over?
-His face changes way too much depending on the styling.
-Seriously, what does Kang I-yul even look like? I can't recognize him every time I see him;;
-Is he bad on camera? He's insanely handsome in person. It's such a wasteㅠ
But not anymore.
The Kang I-yul standing here now was a face that anyone could only acknowledge.
Being handsome was a given.
Now he had an atmosphere to match.
“Just move around naturally.”
Click, click.
The shutter never stopped.
I clenched my fist for no reason, overwhelmed by emotion.
This time, things would be different from the very beginning.
---
After Kang I-yul's shoot ended to overwhelming praise, everyone who came after him was the very definition of “flashy.”
Bleached hair.
Vibrant colors.
Overly tight curls.
Accessories dangling everywhere.
Even Nobodies 1, 2, and 3, the guys who had picked a fight with me, had apparently coordinated their looks and all ended
up with traffic-light hair.
“Wow.”
‘At least we'll be able to spot them from a distance.’
Everyone glared into the camera and screamed their desire with their entire bodies.
‘I am an idol.’
Click, click—
I understood the desire to look cool.
But everything was better in moderation.
The photographer's sighs grew longer and longer.
The staff exchanged glances.
‘Half of them…… are going to kick themselves under the blankets when they see these photos.’
I quietly waited for my turn at the end.
“Last one, huh? Trainee Yoo Seong-woo?”
“Yes!”
Finally, my name was called.
A glorious achievement accomplished after a full three hours.
Any nervousness had disappeared long ago.
With the prospect of finally getting one step closer to going home, I happily walked forward.
But the moment I stood beneath the lights—
‘Wow, this…….’
My eyes instinctively squinted.
‘Just opening my eyes is already a challenge.’
“All right, stand in the center and look straight ahead.”
The photographer's voice kept flying at me.
“Pull your chin in just a little—no, don't pull it in that much!”
“Like this?”
“That's too much.”
And that was the beginning of a silent scream.
“Relax your body a little, but not too much. Just put a little tension in your fingertips—”
‘What kind of warm iced Americano nonsense is that supposed to mean?’
Click.
“Smile slightly, but don't close your eyes too much. Try lifting just the corners of your mouth as much as possible.”
I felt like I wanted to become a marionette.
Pull all the strings attached to my mouth upward.
Loosen all the strings attached to my eyes.
“Look at the camera with a blank expression, put a little strength only in your eyes, but relax the tension in your
face—”
What else could I do?
I simply followed his instructions.
At least he wasn't sighing like he had earlier, so I considered that a blessing.
Click.
The back of my neck tingled, and even my toes were tense.
“Now! That's it. That's perfect. Hold that pose—”
But the photographer showed no intention of stopping.
The flash went off again.
“All right, keep the same posture and change your expression. We'll do one more.”
“Yes!”
While he briefly drank some water, I finally let out the breath I'd been holding.
For the first time since the shoot began, I was looking at the photographer instead of the camera.
His face was flushed with excitement.
“This time, let's have you smile as widely as possible.”
The photographer smiled.
“It's okay if we can see all your braces.”
For a moment, my mind went completely blank.
Smile……
As widely as possible?
“What happened? You suddenly froze.”
“Again! Let's make it a little more natural.”
This was the hardest mission imaginable.
My facial muscles simply wouldn't cooperate.
‘Naturally…… naturally…….’
The problem was that thinking about being natural already made me unnatural.
Click.
For the first time, the shutter stopped.
“Don't force yourself to smile. Just think of one moment when you were happy.”
One moment when I'd been happy.
Those words echoed in my head.
When I first received a song commission?
When one of my songs reached number one?
There were plenty of moments that came to mind, but I couldn't grasp any of them clearly.
Then—
Kang I-yul, now changed back into his own clothes, entered my field of vision.
The hand habitually brushing his hair behind his ear.
At that moment, a memory overlapped with what I was seeing.
A flower festival held in the countryside.
Impactor was performing when an older woman standing near the front handed them a single flower.
It was such a small, low stage that she could reach it simply by stretching out her hand.
Kang I-yul looked surprised for a moment.
Then he smiled brightly and accepted the flower.
Without hesitation, he tucked it behind his ear.
I thought my breath had stopped.
‘Even in a moment like this, you shine.’
There were no dazzling lights.
No enormous stage.
And yet he shone.
No.
He knew how to shine.
That memory came rushing over me like a wave.
Click.
Before I knew it, I was smiling brightly.
It was simply a smile that had burst out from somewhere inside me.
“Nice!”
The photographer's voice rose.
“That's it! That expression right there!”
Click, click, click!
The shutter went off repeatedly, and I kept smiling.
Not at the camera.
At Kang I-yul beyond it.
Finally, when the photographer lowered his camera, everyone crowded around the monitor.
“Holy shit.”
“We could probably just release this exactly as it is.”
“This came out insanely well.”
Only then did I look at the screen.
“……Ah.”
There I was.
A face smiling so brightly that my braces were completely visible.
And the emotion captured in that smile was so vivid that I couldn't describe it with words.
It was an expression I'd never once encountered, even after looking at myself in the mirror for my entire life.
I couldn't take my eyes off the screen for a long time.
‘So this is what I looked like.’
It was dazzling.
I'd never once wondered what I looked like when I was looking at Kang I-yul.
My chest swelled with emotion.
My throat tightened.
The corners of my eyes grew hot.
It wasn't only Kang I-yul who had been shining.
I, too, had been shining alongside him in those moments, at the same temperature, within the same span of time.
The me on that screen proved it.
“Seong-woo, you did really well.”
The photographer smiled.
“When these photos are released, people are going to go crazy.”
“Exactly. The moment they see this, they'll vote for him.”
The admiration continued around me.
But I could barely hear what they were saying.
My eyes simply wouldn't leave the screen.
‘……Yeah.’
Only now did I think I understood.
I wasn't someone who had simply spent my life chasing after a shining star.
I was someone who had faced that light and, within the same moments, shone alongside it at the same warmth.
For the first time, I truly faced myself.