My First Legendary Item Was a Fucking Elixir
My first legendary item in this life was a fucking elixir. I’d suspected as much, but it really was the real thing. My head was ringing so hard I felt dizzy. Was I happy about it? No. Fuck no. Absolutely not.
This… isn’t even decent thesis material…… That was why. The reason I was letting out a hollow laugh.
Elixirs were one of the few potions whose recipes had survived into the modern era. They were treated as closely guarded secrets—passed down one heir at a time, never taught to outsiders, never taken beyond the family gate—but the actual manufacturing method still existed. If you looked hard enough, you’d probably even find an intangible cultural asset like “18th-generation Elixir Craftsman.” That was why the archaeological community didn’t consider discovering an elixir some monumental achievement. It was basically the other-world version of Coca-Cola; figuring out the recipe from the finished product was nearly impossible.
Still, it’s not like this is a bad thing.
By weight, this stuff was more expensive than mithril. The legendary potion that could cure anything except death, cancer, and male-pattern baldness. But if only it had come with the recipe… I could have named my own price, even if they brought me a thousand bottles.
Then again, maybe it was for the best. If money had blinded us, we might have ended up drawing blades on each other. Thinking about it that way made this feel like a decent outcome. Besides, we’d also obtained a map to other forward bases. I should just be satisfied that we’d secured funds.
“An elixir?! I-is that really an elixir?!”
The moment I stepped out carrying the box, Tirsi let out a scream. Everyone else’s eyes widened to the size of fists at the sound.
“N-no, Nord!! C-can I… can I take a look?!”
Tirsi approached as if possessed, babbling in an odd voice. I trusted her and held out one of the potion bottles.
“There are four bottles. Is one enough?”
“Detect Coagulation!”
Whoooosh.
Light enveloped the potion bottle the moment Tirsi cast the spell. I think she’d used the same magic when we fought the golem.
Shake shake shake shake.
Tirsi stared at the light with such intensity that she suddenly developed a case of violent tremors. Startled, I snatched the potion back.
“Tirsi. What’s wrong?”
“What do you mean, what’s wrong?! This is a top-grade elixir with zero sediment and perfectly even mana distribution! Four bottles of this could build an entire mansion!”
She asked it like she couldn’t understand why I wasn’t shocked. Look, when the units get that big, it stops feeling real. Might as well say I won the lottery.
While I was staring doubtfully at the elixir, Selena unfolded her fan.
“A-ha-ha-ha!! I’m more shocked than I’ve ever been in my entire life! I feel like my eyes might roll right out of my head!!”
Selena spoke in a tone that suggested she was anything but surprised.
“Mister Nord!! Congratulations!! This is the first time I’ve ever seen an elixir myself!! Father had some, but he never showed them to me!!”
“R-really?”
“Yes!! I’m already starting to regret acting so proud earlier!! But words once spoken and suns once set can never be taken back!! We will not ask for any share of your elixir!!”
That was honestly a relief to hear. Still, just in case, I’d have to watch my back on the way home so no one planted a knife in my skull.
When Selena burst into laughter, we naturally turned to Nathan. He cleared his throat.
“Ahem. The second clause of our contract stated that acquired items would be divided into three equal parts, correct? Since Miss Selena has yielded her share, we would be entitled to one and a half bottles—”
Nathan cut himself off and whispered with his party members. Was he seriously considering stabbing us in the back over this?
I set the potion box down, but Nathan continued with a genuinely regretful expression.
“We will take only half a bottle for emergency use. You were the ones who found everything from start to finish, and you helped us last time as well, didn’t you?”
“You’re sure? I don’t refuse good will, you know.”
“Hahaha. We didn’t come here just to make money. Let’s call it the pleasure of meeting good business partners. Please remember that Team Viridian is always open to requests.”
“I’ll keep that in mind. Heh heh heh.”
I divided the elixirs according to what Nathan said and handed them over. All the while, I was secretly laughing inside.
So they know they weren’t much help.
Of course, adventurers weren’t the type to feel guilty and voluntarily reduce their share. Even if they did nothing, they’d still demand their agreed payment. But that only applied in the deep layers between the Adamantite and Mithril ranks.
Image management, huh? Pretty smart.
The daughter of one of Romania’s largest merchant guilds, a doctoral researcher and lab director in the archaeological community, and possibly even me in the future. Getting labeled a “leech” by that many important people was the last thing a high-ranking adventurer wanted.
Once you reach Mithril rank, you start caring about your reputation.
Who would trust an adventurer team that sold its conscience for money? The story changed once you rose above mithril, but at the Mithril level there were plenty of peers. With so many substitutes available, if you didn’t manage your image properly, you’d be stuck with the scraps no one else wanted. Yeah. Yeah.
“It would be hard to find better compensation than this. We can report that the tower has been fully cleared.”
Nathan spoke bitterly as he accepted his half bottle. No one argued with him.
We gathered the few spoils we had and decided to head back up the ruins. Incidentally, no one wanted Crown of Crowns’ book because “the content wasn’t anything special,” so it became Larilura’s property entirely.
“Ahaha ha ha♡ Ehehehe♡”
Larilura hugged the book tightly to her chest as if terrified it might tear, laughing brightly. I wondered if I’d react the same way if I found material for a proper paper. I was curious about its contents, so I’d ask her about it later.
Dana will probably add my name to this expedition report too.
Thanks to the field assistance of Master Nord, the exploration was a success. Something like that. Basically the same as getting your name added to a group project. It was one more line on my resume as an archaeologist. If we could locate the ruins marked on the map, escaping my master’s degree might not be far off.
Anyway, we retraced our steps and climbed back up the tower.
“Koro ro ro ro—!!”
The insect monsters tried to block our path, apparently summoned from various places in the other world, but standing in the way of a party that included two Mithril-class and one near-Mithril-class fighters only earned them a quick death.
“The sun after almost three whole days!!”
The moment we reached the surface, Selena shouted with overflowing energy. I checked my pocket watch. It was 1:20. Fuck, we’d already been inside that tower for three days.
“Director Berbeia. If you could sign here on the request form…”
“Ah, yes.”
The Mithril team had prepared documents while climbing up. After receiving Dana’s signature, they bowed to us.
“Then we’ll take our leave. We plan to rest a bit before continuing practical training, so we hope to see you again someday.”
“Yes. Have a safe trip. Take care.”
Nod.
Nathan and his companions nodded in acknowledgment and returned to their tent. It seemed that the ability to part ways cleanly—like Nefertiti did—was also part of a veteran adventurer’s skill set.
“Dismuke!! Prepare to return to Heisvent!! Everyone!! Get ready to head back!!”
“Yes, my lady.”
“The funeral arrangements and condolence money for the deceased… let’s finish discussing that after we return.”
A brief shadow crossed Selena’s face as she sheathed her sword. But the moment she turned back to us, that deep worry had vanished completely, so I pretended not to have seen it. It wouldn’t have been right for me to say anything anyway.
“Mister Nord. There were many twists and turns, but I’m glad we’re parting ways while still alive. As I said before, once I return to Romania I will send you a letter of gratitude.”
“I’ll keep it safe and show it off to guests. I’ll tell them I’m acquainted with a future tycoon.”
“A-ha-ha-ha-ha!! Such pleasant words!!”
Selena reacted favorably to my moderate flattery. She was a merchant; she couldn’t possibly be taken in by my cheap praise. She was probably just giving an appropriate reaction. After laughing until tears formed in her eyes, Selena shook my hand and said,
“Connections really are wonderful things. Sometimes personal networks can protect your life or your fortune. Just like this time.”
“Where I come from, there’s a saying that even brushing sleeves creates a connection. So after fighting together with our lives on the line, wouldn’t you say our bond is far from ordinary?”
“I certainly hope so. With that in mind, I’d like to enclose an invitation along with the letter of gratitude. Would that be all right?”
“An invitation?”
Like asking me to visit her mansion or something? That felt a bit awkward. Maybe it showed on my face, because Selena unfolded her fan and laughed again.
“It’s an invitation to the auction! The grand auction held every spring in the capital of Romania, where fresh green life blooms!”
Ah, that kind of invitation. It was true that I had no idea who might buy the elixir.
If she just sends it, that’d be perfect.
An auction would definitely fetch a higher price than a private sale. There would be plenty of people who’d lose their minds over something like “Legendary elixir of an ancient civilization (with official certification from the Mages’ Guild)”.
“Thank you. That’s a very good reward.”
“Not at all!! I hope you make full use of our connection to sell your fine goods at the appropriate price!! …Ah. Just so you know, a portion of the commission will come to me.”
“Puhuhu. Since I’m receiving the invitation, I’ll gladly accept that.”
Snap!
Selena closed her fan, apparently satisfied with my answer.
“As expected, you’re so magnanimous!! You truly have the bearing of a hero!! By the time we meet again, I will have become an even greater tycoon!! You can look forward to it!!”
Was that her farewell? Selena returned to her tent, still laughing brightly. I think that heroic bearing is more present in your laugh than in me, ma’am.
“Tsk. It’s finally over. Thanks to someone, my heart went through hell—worrying, getting excited, worrying again. I’m exhausted to death.”
Now that only our group remained, Dana grumbled while stretching her arms in a very unrefined manner. The reason it looked crude was because our Dana’s armpits were on full display in the most obscene way. I’d been enjoying the view when Dana’s jab caught me in the shoulder.
“It’s over, right? Let’s go home. I want to wash up so bad I could die. We borrowed horses, so it won’t take long.”
“Ah, about that. I’m sorry, but would it be all right if I return first?”
Tirsi raised her hand as she spoke. Since she couldn’t reinforce her body with mana, she looked the most exhausted out of all of us.
“I heard this was supposed to be a day trip, so I scheduled my work accordingly. I have things to do tomorrow, so I’d like to get back quickly, wash up, and sleep. Is that okay?”
“Ah. If that’s the case, don’t worry about us. Thank you so much for everything, Tirsi. I’ll divide the elixir payment and give you your share later.”
“We helped each other out. Still, it feels good to be thanked for my hard work.”
Tirsi smiled with a tired face. Franc nodded as well.
“Nord, you must be tired? Wait here. I’ll go bring the horses.”
“Horses? You even borrowed horses?”
“Yeah. We were in a hurry. I hired some people to watch them too.”
“Must have spent a lot. Sorry about that.”
“Is money the issue? My husband didn’t die, so it’s all good.”
With that, Dana waved her hand dismissively and left with Franc and Tirsi to fetch the horses.
Thud.
I sat down cross-legged in the wilderness. Fuck, every time I come to this western-movie-set-looking place I only end up suffering.
Plop.
While I was clicking my tongue, Larilura sat down beside me. I didn’t pay her much mind and simply gazed at the blue sky. I had many memories of the night sky with Franc. But after spending so much time in the dark other world, this bright daylight sky didn’t feel bad at all.
“It’s blue and bright. Nice.”
“It really is.”
Larilura answered my absentminded remark. She sat on the sandy ground, hugging her knees, and muttered in a somewhat distant tone.
“…Hey, senior. Thank you for everything.”
“For what? If it’s about the book you got, I’m planning to borrow it later.”
“Ugh, seriously. Don’t play dumb. You’re smart but you act so dense.”
Thump thump.
Larilura smacked my shoulder like she was sulking. I grinned and flopped down onto the ground.
“What’s there to thank me for? If I started listing them one by one, my mouth would fall off.”
“Yeees, yeees~. Let’s call it even. Anyway, ever since I met you, senior, every single day has been so eventful I never have time to get bored, you know?”
“That’s just how I am. And I don’t get any breaks either, you know?”
“True. This time too, things would’ve gone really bad if I hadn’t been there, right?”
Larilura took off her hat and drew a graceful arc with her slightly swollen lips.
“You know, last time I wasn’t any help at all, so I think I made up for it this time? What do you think, senior?”
“You mean during the black mage incident? Yeah. You fought so well I can forget about what happened back then.”
“Ahaha♡! I knew you’d say that. You live like you have nine lives, senior, so having a reliable junior like me around isn’t bad, right?”
“Heh heh. That’s true. But still, you don’t have to force yourself to help, okay? I have Franc and Dana.”
“Hmmm…… I worked really hard too. But I guess family is still the most reliable, huh?”
Larilura made a rare low sound, sniffling through her nose.
“…How many more wives are you planning to add?”
“I’m not some royalty collecting ten wives. Still, it might end up around four or five.”
That was a number even well-off commoners could manage if they were at the top of their class. You’d need wealth and ability far beyond a poor noble’s to pull it off, but my goal was an even higher hurdle. Still, it wasn’t impossible.
“I see. Two or three more, then.”
Whoosh!
Larilura suddenly sprang to her feet. She turned her back to me, brushed the sand off her pants, and laughed energetically.
“I’m really looking forward to next spring☆! Senior, when you go to Romania you absolutely have to take me with you, okay? I want to see the troupe leader and my circus friends too!”
“Sure. Why not.”
I answered with a smile and closed my eyes. Next spring. It wouldn’t be long now until the fourth anniversary of my arrival in this other world.