Chapter 40
Translator: True Detective
Chapter 40: Course Registration (2)
Roughly drank the Hyeja lunchbox. Finished it at a speed where I didn't know if the rice grains were going into my nose or my mouth.
I swallowed my saliva and checked the clock at the bottom of the monitor.
[ 09:58:00 ]
A tense moment. Palms got sweaty so I wiped them roughly on my pants.
Someone asks. Isn't course registration a fight of finger speed, namely a physical game.
Not at all. This is a thorough brain-physical game and a battle of wits.
Why? You can know the reason from now on.
I stared intently at the [Server Time Site] popped up in a corner of the monitor.
The second hand moves. 58 minutes 50 seconds... 59 seconds...
[ 09:59:00 ]
1 minute before. Heartbeat gets faster. The index finger holding the mouse twitched.
40 seconds... 45 seconds...
[ 09:59:50 ]
"Now."
From this moment on, must act on instinct, not reason. I started mashing the F5 (Refresh) key crazily.
*Ta-da-da-da-dak!*
If concurrent users crowd, the server gets lag. Do I have to press around 59 minutes 58 seconds to enter at 00 seconds, or do I have to press at 59 seconds. That subtle sensation divides victory and defeat.
[ 10:00:00 ]
*Click!*
Pressed the Enter key of destiny.
[ Waiting to connect... ]
White loading screen. Please, please.
But.
[ 502 Bad Gateway ]
[ No response from the server. ]
"Ah-it, f*ck!!!"
Server bounced. White screen, the so-called 'Blank Paper Terror'.
Usually mental explodes here and easy to get ruined saying "Uh-uh?". But I don't panic.
"Don't be nervous. It's within expected range."
First turn off that site viewing server time. In a situation where every minute and second is urgent now, there's no luxury to waste bandwidth keeping things like that open.
*Click.*
Closed the window, and immediately took out the hidden card hidden in the taskbar.
Prepared for unexpected situations, I had the course registration site open on another browser (Whale, not Croc). ID and password? Already typed in.
This is my bullet.
*Ta-tak!*
Pressed the login button. While a horde of thousands of zombies is knocking on the front gate, I'm attempting to slide through the dog hole.
Please... please...!
[ Logged in. ]
"Pierced through!!!"
Screen changed. Course registration list appeared.
Still too early to be relieved. Login is just the beginning. The real war starts from now.
"Quickly, quickly...!"
I moved the mouse with trembling hands.
[ Fundamentals of Computer Programming (Section 1) ]
[ Discrete Mathematics ]
.
.
.
[ Introduction to Engineering Design ]
*Ta-dak! Ta-dak!*
Mashed the register button.
Fortunately the once-pierced server was a highway. Every time I pressed they stuck into the registration list as if put in a shopping cart. Safely secured major courses.
"Next... Electives!"
The real decisive battleground is here. I moved the mouse cursor to the [Electives] tab.
[ Understanding of Modern History ]
[ Understanding of Male and Female Culture ]
Found the pre-selected courses and pressed the register button.
*Click.*
But.
"......?!"
The screen froze. Clicked it, but no reaction. The infinite loading of terror began.
"Ah... please. Please. Please."
Mouth dried up completely.
If it lags here it's the end. Can't even press refresh. If I did that I'd be pushed to the very back of the queue. Only choice is to wait.
*Spin spin.*
Only the heartless loading icon was spinning.
"Please... God, Buddha, Allah! I beg you!"
I grabbed the monitor and started praying.
"Where is there a guy who lived as kindly as me! Bought chicken for younger sister recently! Lent her clothes too! Disciplined her too! Yeah?!"
Summoning gods I didn't even seek normally, scraped together the paltry good deeds of my life.
Please pierce through. Please.
*Tick.*
Loading stopped like a lie. And a pop-up window appeared.
[ Course registration is complete. ]
"......!"
I leaned my body back against the chair backrest with a thud and shouted.
"Wow... F*ck, it's done!!!"
Success. Major requirements, popular electives. All clear...!
Desired timetable miraculously completed.
Now only one thing remains. Just need this f*cking school server not to suddenly reset, or explode with a stupid accident (Byeong-keu) like bouncing due to a system error.
Please, God. There is nothing dirtier than giving and taking away.
I pressed the save button one more time with trembling hands. Confirmation kill completed.
"Haaaa..."
Energy drained completely as tension released.
It was only a few minutes, but felt like my lifespan shortened by 3 years. Please manage the server properly, praying there won't be an unfortunate accident of hard-caught classes disintegrating into thin air and shooting a battle royale again.
"First... should report survival."
I picked up the smartphone and entered the [ Clean Male Student Room (5) ].
For reference, the entire group chat including Casanova No. 1 and No. 2 is practically an abandoned room.
Because those guys wouldn't be interested in losers like us anyway, and obvious they'd be laughing 'haha hoho' with older female seniors having their timetables made for them by now.
Let's turn off nerves for their own league. We have our own desperate survival diary.
[Me] (10:13)
: Guys did you register well?
A moment later, replies came up pouring as if they waited.
[Park Hyun-woo] (10:13)
: ㅠㅠ Jin-hyuk-ah... my hands were shaking almost threw the mouse. Still all-cleared though.
[Lee Do-hyun] (10:14)
: Wow, elective competition rate was crazy? 0.1 sec cut. Caught it luckily.
[Kim Min-soo] (10:15)
: Almost missed one major but picked it up at the last minute. Burned white... Phew...
Thank god. Everyone returned alive safely without stragglers.
In this rough female-dominated Engineering College, if even one male classmate fails a grade and disappears, the survival probability (aggro dispersion rate) of the remaining people drops drastically. Must stick together to live.
For reference, reconciled dramatically with Hyun-woo.
Though I begged profusely shooting gifticons via Talk yesterday, the guy must have felt it to the bone too.
How dangerously suicidal it is to attend 'Alone as a Man' in this jungle-like school.
"Monday opening general assembly... don't leave me alone..."
"Don't worry. When going to the restroom... won't hold hands but I'll go with you. We are one."
We made a firm Peach Garden Oath.
Because in Monday's classroom, to avoid suffering a 'public execution' receiving hundreds of gazes sitting alone in the middle of that savage savanna, we are indispensable existences to each other.
Rather than friendship, this is, what is it... a strategic alliance for survival. Men gotta stick together, right.
Of course, if the moment comes when I have to abandon him again, I'll abandon him if push comes to shove. Originally the way to live when meeting a bear, is not running faster than the bear but running faster than your friend.
[Me] (10:16)
: Yeah. Everyone worked hard. See you Monday.
: Yeah. Everyone worked hard. See you Monday.
: Hyun-woo-ya. Don't be late. If you're late going to abandon you and go in.
[Park Hyun-woo] (10:16)
: Hey!!!
I ignored the guy's scream and turned off the phone.
"....Phew."
War preparation is over. Now it's real classes starting.
...So I say, but.
Couldn't take my butt off the chair.
Just in case, one in ten thousand. Anxious that this damn ruined school server might explode belatedly and cause a catastrophe like 'Data Rollback' or 'Reset due to computer error', I can't go anywhere.
Originally on course registration day, shouldn't let go of the string of tension until 6 PM.
"...Should I look at public opinion first."
I picked up the smartphone again and turned on Pandora's Box [Bamboo Forest]. Intended to just watch how the crazy students of this crazy school f*cked up their course registration.
[ Free Board ]
The board was burning as expected. No, lava was flowing.
Title: Hey f*ck is the server real?
Did my tuition not go to the server but into the President's belly fat? 502 Bad Gateway what is that lololol Is it real that after piercing queue 3000 times a white screen pops up
[Comments]
[Anonymous1]
Not only me who bounced right? Thank god ^^ Let's all die together
[Anonymous2]
Ah... my timetable... shopping cart all exploded... suicide angle...
[Anonymous3]
[Anonymous1]
Not only me who bounced right? Thank god ^^ Let's all die together
[Anonymous2]
Ah... my timetable... shopping cart all exploded... suicide angle...
[Anonymous3]
President's office coordinates please. Going to throw a Molotov cocktail.
Title: [Buying] Looking for a spot in 'Understanding Easy Japanese'. Will reward generously.
Please message me. Taking offers first. Can go up to 5. Please ㅠㅠ
[Comments]
[Anonymous1]
Why are you taking that? Not even a honey course (Kkul-gang).
⤷ [Anonymous(Writer)] Shut up I just want to take it.
[Anonymous2]
[Anonymous1]
Why are you taking that? Not even a honey course (Kkul-gang).
⤷ [Anonymous(Writer)] Shut up I just want to take it.
[Anonymous2]
Competition rate for that was crazy lolol 0.1 sec cut give up.
Title: 1st year Comp Eng please coach my timetable (Photo)
(Image of a hellish timetable full of 1st period classes Monday to Friday)
(Image of a hellish timetable full of 1st period classes Monday to Friday)
Is God-life (productive life) possible with this? Thinking of retaking college entrance exam.
[Comments]
[Anonymous1]
Hey, you too? Hey, me too.
[Anonymous2]
5 1st period classes lololol Are you human? A zombie?
[Anonymous3]
[Anonymous1]
Hey, you too? Hey, me too.
[Anonymous2]
5 1st period classes lololol Are you human? A zombie?
[Anonymous3]
Drop out that's faster. 5 days of 1st period even the professor dozes off while calling attendance.
"......"
Wow. A mess.
Screams and curses were rampant every time I scrolled down.
Someone got ruined because the server bounced, someone got ruined due to a miss-click, and someone just got ruined. Those who survived this hellscape were a tiny minority.
And one of that tiny minority, is exactly me.
"Phew..."
Swept down my chest. No such thing as a male quota system. It was purely a miracle created by my physicals (crazy clicking) and luck.
After seeing that scene of agonizing cries, felt anew to the bone how precious my timetable is. Because I pierced through to get classes others can't get even if they pay money.
"...Is this the leisure of a winner."
I watched others' ruined timetables with the feeling of chewing popcorn. Of course, only laughing inwardly since I'd get stabbed if I spat it out of my mouth.
As time passed...
Can really be relieved now. My timetable is, safe.
As peace visited, the squirming instinct inside me raised its head. Others' misfortune is my happiness. And the words of ancient sages said to share good things.
I smiled an evil smile and pressed the board write button. Originally, there is nothing as thrilling as acting like you succeeded amidst bastards whose course registration got ruined, the so-called 'Deceptive Bragging (Bi-tik)'.
Bi-tik is exactly, joy.
I captured my perfect timetable. Major requirements, popular elective 'Sex and Love' included golden balance timetable. And wrote the post with a very hypocritical and aggrieved tone.
Title: Guys ㅠㅠ please look at my timetable...
(Photo)
No... I originally wanted to take 'Understanding of Philosophy' but my hand slipped and registered for 'Sex and Love' ㅠㅠ Heard this is boring should I drop it?
(Photo)
No... I originally wanted to take 'Understanding of Philosophy' but my hand slipped and registered for 'Sex and Love' ㅠㅠ Heard this is boring should I drop it?
And majors all avoided morning classes and got caught in the afternoon... I'm a morning person wanting to wake up early what do I do? Am I ruined? ㅠㅠ
[ Registration Complete ]
3 seconds after uploading. Comment section exploded.
[Anonymous1]
?
[Anonymous2]
Hey where do you live. Call out the address.
[Anonymous3]
Stop your deceptive bragging -- Before I kill you.
[Anonymous4]
Wow... Concept or real? Caught 'Sex and Love' by mistake? F*cking b*tch...
[Anonymous5]
Please drop it. I will pick it up. Will give 30,000 won reward. Check message please.
[Anonymous6]
(Severe curse) (Severe curse)
"......Kuh-heup."
Bit my lip tight to hold back bursting laughter. Corners of my mouth went up as if to hang on my ears.
Reaction is very sticky (good). Like live fish jumping around. Seeing the screams of suffering sentient beings, feels like my blocked insides are blown wide open. Doing community for this taste.
"Ah, stress relieved."
I watched the pouring messages and cursing comments with satisfaction like listening to classical music, then leisurely deleted the post.
Hit and run.
Not leaving a trace. This is exactly the aesthetics of trolling, and the attitude of an intellectual.
Perfect morning. Now with a refreshed mind, should pull a round of Time and Space (Heroes of the Storm).
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