Chapter 33
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Translator: penny
Chapter: 33
Chapter Title: Night Guards in Pairs (3)
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"..."
"..."
Walking silently back to the apartment with Anonymous 1, maintaining our silence.
"Five rings and television?"
"Meal and clay pillar water bottle."
Whether those two monsters were actually conversing with each other.
Or if one of them was human, pretending to be a monster by putting on this act...
Either way, we could see the other guards—chilling conversations that sent shivers down our spines.
'If one of those two is human... man, that'd be rough.'
Reminding ourselves that just surviving on our own was tough enough right now, we decided not to probe whether one of them was human.
The moment we were about to head into the apartment...
"..?"
Suddenly, the guards cut off their conversation and went quiet.
"Bu, boombar dilro...! Croco-dil...ro."
"..What, what dildo...? Crocodile dildo?"
"Dilo..!"
Spouting nonsense to act as naturally monstrous as possible.
"House death yesterday-ha."
"Goose meat guard duty."
The night guards eyeing us suspiciously went on their way.
'So unconditional silence looks suspicious?'
Maybe our dead silence had seemed off.
Or perhaps those guards were human too, trying to check if we were real people...
Whatever the truth, we learned that making some noise kept their suspicions at bay.
"Cappuccino... assassin-o."
"??"
The moment I spat out something plausible, I grabbed Anonymous 1's arm and hustled us inside the apartment.
"..."
"..."
He looked like he had a ton to say, but given the situation, we kept quiet until we reached Room 201.
'Just had to get here, right?'
Once we arrived at Room 201, there wasn't much else to do.
Having followed the rulebook, we were about to head back to the guard post when...
Screeech...
The door to Room 202, right next to 201, slowly creaked open.
"..."
"..."
My heart pounded like mad.
What snapped me out of my frozen daze... was Anonymous 1.
"Awl...! Lego, lion statue, let's go."
"..!"
Thanks to his absurd sentence, I realized I was gripping my awl, ready to fight whatever was coming out of 202...
I spun around and quick-marched out of the apartment.
Clank—
Back inside the guard post.
'No one's here? Right?'
After scanning the post and confirming we were alone...
"Hoo... haaa... man, I thought my heart was gonna explode..."
"Huuuh... yeah, for real..."
We finally let out the sighs we'd been holding.
"Hey, Big Whale."
"Yeah?"
"Why do you keep... trying to fight them...?"
"Oh, uh... it's a habit. I always run into monsters in dead ends with no escape..."
"That's a really bad habit. We gotta run, always. Sure, you're a supernova who's cleared way more ghost story dungeons than me... but we're just regular humans. If we mess up fighting monsters... you know what happens, right?"
"Yeah..."
"Run while we can. Fight only when there's no choice. Got it?"
"Yep..."
Anonymous 1 was right.
All my past encounters had been in no-escape spots, forcing me to prep for battle.
Like just now—trying to fight when we could run... was basically suicide.
"Unlike you, I'm just a regular human... I can't kill monsters or anything."
"Uh... I'm just a regular human too...?"
"Haha, that joke was gold."
"?"
"Big Whale, a regular human... If the community was up, I'd share this hilarious news with everyone."
"???"
From now on, I'd run whenever possible.
"Anyway, what was that earlier? A crocodile with a dildo?"
"...No idea what you heard, but it was just a meme. Blew up worldwide then fizzled out."
"Meme? Oh... I've been here so long, I missed the new trends..."
From chatting with Anonymous 1, I could tell he'd been surviving here a long time.
But I decided not to pry.
"Ha... wonder if we can get out. Even with a supernova like you, Big Whale... this is the first ghost story where I'm not confident. Tense stuff."
"We can get out. If no escape route shows, we just clear the ghost story."
"As expected of Jongno's Kim Big Whale. I respect that confidence."
"Nah... not from Jongno, and last name's not Kim."
Vowing to focus solely on escaping this place.
I poked my head out to observe the other night guards.
"To find the escape key... we gotta spot the real human hiding among the night guards."
"Same thought. Finding a human should tell us why the status window isn't activating and all the details."
"Right?"
"Problem is how. How do we find a human without other monsters noticing? While keeping them from learning our language."
Anonymous 1 hit the nail on the head.
Monsters were still learning our language patterns.
If we blurted out a phrase A to find humans, a monster guard who learned A would use it on a real human.
And if that human fell for it, mistaking the monster for human and revealing themselves...
"Real issue. What phrases won't matter if monsters learn them..."
"Stuff like that doesn't solve everything, even for a Big Whale."
Suddenly missing the community hard.
The collective wisdom could've given killer advice...
"We've got time to burn, so let's think it over slowly."
Three hours and fifty minutes since Anonymous 1 and I started our shift—our third night patrol was approaching.
"Let's go. This time, focus on the apartments and check for anomalies."
"Got it."
Planning to keep hunting escape clues during patrol.
We slipped out of the post and circled the apartments when...
"Boombar dilrok lokerdilro."
"What dildo croco dildo?"
'They're mimicking our conversation exactly.'
Another guard perfectly copying our talk.
Not quite perfect, confirming it wasn't human—but a stark reminder of their learning speed.
That's when, in the distance...
'Why are they all gathering here...?'
More night guards heading our way.
"Heavenly lizard mong."
"O, chocolate. Cat."
Forcing some words to slip away...
"Tralala lero tral, lala."
"Zipper cracked from above."
Sudden brainrot meme from another guard...
'...Did I mention the shark with legs earlier?'
I hadn't brought up the legged shark name recently.
Which meant...
'Human? Or a monster who learned it?'
This guard spouting an internet meme... either learned it from another survivor here, or was real.
So...
"..Chimpeni banana nini."
"?"
Tossing out another brainrot variant, just in case...
"Tung... tungtungtungtung... sahoor..?"
"..Lilili laril...la."
Now I was sure: my convo partner was human.
And they were sure about me too.
"..!"
The human guard rushed up close...
"?"
Shoved a slip of paper into my hand, then walked off with their partner.
Back at the post after the third patrol.
"What was that? I thought you were about to get shanked, got chills..."
"They slipped me a note."
"Note? But... what the hell did you even say...?"
"Chatted via old Italian brainrot meme."
"..No way?"
"Guards who haven't learned it yet... only humans would know. They confirmed I was human the same way."
"Whoa... never would've thought of that."
"Lucky we clicked."
We ducked inside and unfolded the paper.
Surprisingly...
We've confirmed: 15:10 ~ 15:25, safe to roam outside alone.
Haven't scoped other times yet, but let's meet then to share info.
Behind the 3rd Guard Post.
Another survivor's message.
"Maybe... we can escape way faster than I thought."
"How?"
"Gather all the people here..."
"You're not about to say 'fight the monsters,' are you?"
"Gather... and through... group orgy..."
"..Just say fight. I'll hear you out."
"Sigh... more people, maybe we can take on monsters."
"Yeah. Better than orgy."
Felt like I got disqualified as human by Anonymous 1.
Anyway.
"Tonight, let's keep finding people."
"Again? Won't monsters learn that Italian bra-whatever meme by now?"
Not full war with monsters... but.
With more humans, escape clues would come easier.
"Use words monsters haven't learned."
"Like?"
"Mesugaki."
"Mesugaki..?"
"Yeah. What word pops up for you?"
"..Loli? Trash..?"
"Exactly. Toss 'mesugaki' at a new guard. If they say loli or trash?"
"Human."
"Bingo."
Time to rally as many survivors as possible.
"..But does it have to be mesugaki?"
"Plenty others."
"..Like?"
"Eh. Hitomi, milf... futa...nari... stuff like that."
"..Definitely human."
"..."
"Our Big Whale... way more impressive than me..?"
No, but seriously...
Is there better convo to confirm humans...?
"Wait, so... Anonymous 1, got better words?"
"I figured world movies like Titanic. Universal for any nationality. But... wow... Big Whale never disappoints."
"..Never talk to me again."
"Aw, why. Don't pout, Big Whale."
"Car sky vroom scream."
"Please, Big Whale..!"
"Clay and fingers from the nape."
"Big Whale..!!"