Three Kings (2)
Now, what to do first······.
Rembrary strolled along with a contented smile, and decided that the first order of business was to naturally find out where he would be staying for the week. Wherever he went, food, clothing, and shelter always came first, did they not?
"Sangseon."
"Yes, Your Majesty."
"I am weary. I shall go to my chamber and enjoy a hot bath."
"Yes, Your Majesty."
The royal secretariat staff member, sharp as ever, caught Rembrary's intent immediately.
"Excuse me for a moment, then."
The whole walk there, Rembrary felt quietly proud of himself. The thought that he had put his memorized vocabulary to use left him pleasantly warm inside.
"Gatolidoksa Gatoribaam Gatidokshaga anahwanhi gimda. Bayam ganda, bayam ganda."
Riding the momentum, Rembrary scraped together every word he had memorized and hummed them out cheerfully. He dearly wanted to take this opportunity to publicize, loudly and often, that he was absolutely not an idiot.
Back when he had been High Priest, whenever he displayed this kind of cleverness, people would sing his praises: "Our High Priest is truly brilliant!"
Rembrary, deeply satisfied, clasped his hands behind his back. No one shall call me a blockhead ever again.
And in truth, the secretariat staff and civilian participants alike privately concluded that Rembrary was not quite as ignorant as they'd assumed. What exactly he was muttering to himself, nobody could tell, but still.
Moreover, they were struck by his presence.
Rembrary striding along proudly in his dragon robes — with that snow-white hair, it lacked the feel of an actual Joseon king, but it gave off the unmistakable air of a genuine monarch of some country or other.
It was a strange thing: he didn't look the part of a king, and yet the king's role suited him perfectly.
"Here we are, Your Majesty."
The place the secretariat staff had led him to was a building of dignified, elegant beauty beneath a dark indigo roof — similar in shape to the temple he had visited the other day, yet different in feeling.
"This way, please, Your Majesty."
When Rembrary looked around in wide-eyed curiosity, the staff member assumed he must be confused about which of the several rooms was his, and quickly gestured out the direction he was meant to go.
Inside the room at the end of that direction, a thick, plush quilt had already been laid out. The moment Rembrary saw it, fatigue crashed over him like a wave.
"Then I shall take my rest."
No sooner had the words left his mouth than Rembrary hurried to the bed and lay down. The quilt prepared here was so soft and yielding that the bedding back at the dormitory could not even compare.
It's surely not the same material a real king would use, but it is unquestionably better than the dormitory bedding.
"Extinguish the lamps and withdraw."
Having given the command as naturally as breathing, Rembrary slipped under the covers and shut his eyes.
He's actually going to sleep? Already? Without filming more content? The secretariat staff member stared at him in disbelief, but Rembrary was already lying on his side, facing away, eyes closed.
It wasn't an act. He had been up since the small hours of the morning getting the "imperceptible but undeniably effective" makeup applied, and he was genuinely exhausted.
Thanks to his Divine Power, his face stayed fresh and clear even on too little sleep, but that did nothing for mental fatigue.
The staff member watched Rembrary's back in a daze for a while, then finally stepped out into the corridor. The staff didn't work entirely without a script, but the virtue of Time Machine for Just One Week was that they interfered as little as possible.
Out in the hallway, the staff member took up position before the closed door, exactly as real eunuchs would have done.
The court lady and eunuch players who found themselves standing there alongside him exchanged glances and stifled giggles.
At the pre-show meeting, the civilian participants had been asked to live as though they had truly become palace ladies and eunuchs of old for the duration of their week here.
Among the instructions was that some of them would take turns attending the king or standing guard outside his chamber.
They had braced themselves for it in their own way, but the awkwardness was inevitable — every time their eyes met, laughter kept bubbling out.
The secretariat staff member alone stood perfectly straight, quietly calculating which places he would need to take Yeon-woo to later, and when.
Meanwhile, Shin Jo-woon, who had entered a little after Rembrary, immediately went looking for the most atmospheric pavilion on the set.
The staff member assigned to him thought, as expected of the CEO — a man of different caliber, and guided him there.
The pavilion wasn't far off, and while it was clearly newly built, it had been decorated with considerable charm.
"Fine wind today."
Shin Jo-woon murmured it in a low voice, clasped his hands behind his back, and stepped up onto the pavilion floor.
He looked exactly like a young, handsome monarch out of a comic book, and the civilian participants inwardly marveled.
So it's true — the CEO is more celebrity than the actual celebrities. They could finally understand why people in an entertainment industry overflowing with beautiful faces had been so stunned by Shin Jo-woon.
Shin Jo-woon himself, having received more awestruck stares in his life than he cared to count, paid them no mind — though for entirely different reasons than Rembrary.
His head was busy calculating roughly where Jang Tae-ri and Woo Yeon-woo's positions would be. He wanted to secure his spot first and play a prank on the two of them somehow.
But could you really prank someone when you had no idea where they were?
Shin Jo-woon thought for a moment, then asked one of the eunuch players to go fetch him a persimmon.
"A persimmon, sir?"
"That's right. I'll be waiting here, so bring it to me."
Shin Jo-woon's "Your Majesty" speech, a strange blend of his usual polite register and casual banmal, struck the eunuch as odd, but the man quickly agreed and stepped down from the pavilion.
However, he was a civilian participant too, and this was his first time here. He'd descended from the pavilion right away to play his eunuch role, but he had no idea where to go to find a persimmon.
He ended up winging it, wandering awkwardly from place to place.
In the distance, he spotted another king clad in red dragon robes. He couldn't make out the face, but he heard one of the staff members beside that person calling out to him.
"Your Majesty summons you this way!"
Should I go? The eunuch approached, feeling doubtful — and this king was Jang Tae-ri.
At the sight of her, the civilian participant playing eunuch lowered his gaze out of sheer embarrassment. He'd seen her on Dating Process, and Yeon-woo had gone on and on about her too, but······ up close, Jang Tae-ri really did have the image of a wildcat — the fierce, capable air of her contrasted adorably with her compact frame. And those sharp, clever eyes of hers.
But had he been able to peek inside Jang Tae-ri's head, the eunuch would not have been able to simply admire her.
Jang Tae-ri intended to teach a very thorough lesson to Shin Jo-woon, who had dared to declare himself a king the moment she announced she would be one.
She planned to be a little more lenient with Yeon-woo than with Shin Jo-woon — a small personal bias of hers — but she had absolutely no intention of letting him off entirely.
It pained her a little to think of attacking her beloved Yeon-woo as well, but power had always been merciless, and there could only be one king, could there not?
So Jang Tae-ri, having calculated that this eunuch must belong to either Shin Jo-woon or Woo Yeon-woo, asked:
"You. Where are you headed right now?"
Following the preset script, the eunuch answered as though the three kings were completely indistinguishable.
"Pardon? Well, naturally, I'm off to fetch the persimmon His Majesty just ordered me to bring."
He's carrying food, so he must be the eunuch Yeon-woo sent. Jang Tae-ri zeroed in on her answer.
She had of course considered the possibility that he wasn't Yeon-woo's eunuch, but it made no difference to what she was about to do.
Jang Tae-ri smiled sweetly and gave her command.
"On your way back, grab some apples too, and come here."
"Apples, Your Majesty?"
"Yes. So I may eat persimmon and apple. And you must come here."
Am I even allowed to do this······? The eunuch fretted inwardly for a moment, but answered that he understood and withdrew.
It took him a long while, but he finally managed to locate the food area, and had just gathered persimmons and apples when —
"You there."
As he was walking along, someone called out to him yet again.
Who on earth is it this time? The eunuch, worn out from all this running around, looked up — and it was Rembrary, the last of the three kings he hadn't yet met.
The eunuch sighed once more and approached Rembrary, who asked:
"What is that you carry?"
"The persimmons and apples Your Majesty commanded me to bring, Your Majesty."
The eunuch answered, keeping in mind the established premise that Tae-ri, Yeon-woo, and Jo-woon were all indistinguishable — whereupon Rembrary signaled that he understood, and bade him come closer.
And then, as the eunuch drew near in bewilderment, Rembrary smiled graciously and instructed the staff member standing beside him to take the persimmons and apples.
"Well done on your errand. Most commendable."
"I beg your pardon?"
The eunuch froze and stared at Rembrary for a moment — but Rembrary was already peeling a persimmon and eating it.
"Delicious."
With that, Rembrary turned on his heel and walked off. Taking every last persimmon and apple with him, of course.
The eunuch, flustered, flung out a hand — but in the blink of an eye, before he knew what had happened, he was left empty-handed.
Granted, the other party was a king and he was supposed to be a eunuch, so even without that moment of carelessness he would have ended up empty-handed regardless.
In the end, the eunuch hesitated, then headed back toward the pavilion.
He did waver over whether he ought to go to Jang Tae-ri, but his hands were empty, and he had no apple to deliver. So he went to Shin Jo-woon, his original master.
Yet even on the way there, he couldn't decide whether he had completed his errand or not.
In any case, Shin Jo-woon judged that the eunuch had failed at his task.
"Where is the persimmon?"
"Did Your Majesty not just eat it?"
"When did I ever say such a thing?"
"Pardon?"
"I have been here this whole time, and you brought me nothing at all. How, precisely, could I have eaten anything?"
Having delivered this, Shin Jo-woon let out a short sigh — as if he could see perfectly well how he'd been played — and gave a fresh order.
"Still, disobeying a royal command is beyond the pale. To prison with you."
The eunuch's eyes went wide.
"Prison, sir? Just like that?"
Three hours later, Rembrary came and freed the imprisoned eunuch.
After that, as the eunuch was wandering about looking for his place, Jang Tae-ri found him and demanded to know where her apple had gone and why he still hadn't delivered it — and when he explained he had already delivered it and watched her eat it, she declared he was lying and threw him back in prison.
Rembrary, passing by, let him out again.
"Why do you keep ending up in here?"
Then, as the eunuch tried to go about his business, Shin Jo-woon spotted him and locked him up once more for roaming about unsupervised.
Woo Yeon-woo, passing by that scene, asked "Why are you in here again?" and let him out once more.
After that, Jang Tae-ri spotted the eunuch walking past and, insisting she had never released him, threw him back in.
Woo Yeon-woo witnessed this too, clicked his tongue, and freed the eunuch again.
All of this happened because the set, while spacious, wasn't actually as large as a real palace, and the prison itself sat smack in the middle of a main thoroughfare.
Only after this cycle had repeated itself all the way until evening did Shin Jo-woon personally escort the eunuch to his quarters, smiling faintly to himself.
Nothing concrete, but he had a rough idea now of roughly how far apart Jang Tae-ri's and Woo Yeon-woo's quarters were.
The next morning.
Rembrary rose at a leisurely hour and was mulling over how he might pass the day in comfort when the script suddenly came to mind.
Starting today, there was definitely something he was required to do — and that something was······.
"I am to visit the royal concubines?"
Jang Tae-ri, clad in her dragon robes with her hair neatly arranged, furrowed her brow in feigned surprise at the staff member's words.
Despite having read the entire script beforehand, her acting was surprisingly convincing.
The secretariat staff member smiled with a "Yes, Your Majesty," and explained once more for the benefit of the viewers.
"If you would tell us which lady you wish to meet, we shall arrange a place so that you may share an evening meal together."
At a flick of the staff member's eyes, another eunuch nearby brought over a tray of wooden name tablets and presented them to Jang Tae-ri.
"Which lady will you visit, Your Majesty?"
On the tablets, only the ranks were written — Royal Consort Suk, Royal Consort Hui, and so on. Beyond that, there was no information whatsoever. Not whether they were man or woman, whether they were her age or much older — not even their names.
Jang Tae-ri recalled the second-day event described in the script in a little more detail.
But the script had only said, "Share a dinner date with one of the royal concubines." There was nothing else to go on.
She deliberated for a moment, then picked up the leftmost tablet.
The secretariat staff member looked at the tablet she had drawn and smiled faintly.
What's that smile about? Who did I pick that you're grinning like that?
— End of 123. Three Kings (2) —