Three Kings (1)

Rembrary stared at the Ox-Head, utterly baffled.

The only word he could make out was "moo."

No — he understood what was being said well enough. What he could not understand was why it was being said to him.

The Ox-Head was talking as though... as though Rembrary ought not to attack it.

Rembrary turned the matter over for a moment, then decided to simply ask outright.

"I say there, Moo."

[Moo.]

"Why are you pretending to be so familiar with me?"

At the question, the Ox-Headed Monster's eyes darted about guiltily, and then it held out a hand and said something entirely beside the point.

[H-hold my hand. Hands? Shall we hold hands?]

"Tell me first why you are acting so familiar."

Even so, when Rembrary refused to let it slide, the monster simply repeated itself.

[Not same kind, but close. This close, we hold hands. We interlock fingers too, yes?]

Not kin, but close?

Rembrary was about to demand what on earth that meant when the evil spirit clinging to his shadow occurred to him.

Could it be reacting to that spirit's aura? Does it sense something familiar in the evil spirit's power?

The real Woo Yeon-woo, bound to the shadow, had popped out of the body before, so it would hardly be strange for another youkai to notice the evil spirit soaked into Rembrary's shadow.

But the moment he moved to press for details, a ding announced the elevator doors opening.

Taking that as its cue, the Ox-Headed Monster scurried out the window in a flustered panic.

"Wasn't that a youkai, just now?"

Even as he watched it go, heavy footsteps drew near and Sa Gam-jae's voice rang out. The one who stepped out of the elevator was Sa Gam-jae himself.

When Rembrary stared at him, Sa Gam-jae stared right back with a look that asked why he was staring.

Rembrary sighed. "When you see a youkai, does it never occur to you to go and catch it?"

"That is not my assigned department."

"Gamjae, Gamjae..."

"Who was it?"

"The Ox-Head. The very one you said you would investigate and have heard nothing about since."

"Ah."

Only then did Sa Gam-jae amble over to the window and peer down. Rembrary shook his head slowly at the sight. Evidently Sa Gam-jae reserved all his enthusiasm for ferrying the souls of the dead down to the Underworld.

Was that because this side of the afterlife divided its labor so strictly?

"It appears to be gone already."

"What did you come here for?"

"The ox, you mean?"

"You."

"Jongwoo came looking for me."

Shoving him out the door would be pointless — he clearly had no intention of chasing the Ox-Head down at this stage — so Rembrary simply nodded, pressed the elevator button, and let it be. He had matters to discuss with Sa Gam-jae privately anyway, so there was no need to order him to give chase. Not that he seemed likely to catch it if he did.

While they waited for the elevator, which had carried itself off to another floor, to come back around, Rembrary confirmed that no one else was nearby, then asked:

"Gamjae. What do I seem like to you?"

"Do you mean as humans see you, or as a grim reaper's eyes see you?"

"As your eyes see me."

"You felt like a knockoff Saint."

"..."

"Does that offend you? But the fundamental holy power is different, so I could not help being unused to it. What I sense from you resembles holy power, and yet it is not the holy power I know — so not only I, everyone was confused."

"Tell me this, then. Do you sense anything dangerous from me?"

The elevator arrived, and the doors slid open with a ding.

Yet even as the two of them boarded, the doors closed, and the elevator carried them on its way, Sa Gam-jae held his silence and gave no answer.

An elevator is so cramped a space that it breeds awkwardness even among friends, let alone strangers — and the two of them were no exception. As the silence stretched on, an uncomfortable pall settled over the little metal box.

Rembrary furrowed his brow. Do I truly give off the aura of an evil spirit? Why will he not answer?

Fifteen seconds that felt like an eternity later—

Almost in the same breath as the doors opened with a ding, Sa Gam-jae answered, without conviction.

"A little?"

Back at the dorm, Rembrary sipped the tomato juice Jungseo had blended for him and ate his ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠chicken breast salad in gloomy silence — the same salad he had eaten so much of it had lost ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠all taste.

Thanks to his devoted pizza consumption he had gained two kilograms, whereupon Jongwoo had leapt into action and slashed his chicken breast rations, so the plate held fewer pieces than usual.

But Rembrary's glumness was not the chicken's fault alone.

He was turning over what Sa Gam-jae had said, and what the Ox-Head had said.

He radiates a dangerous aura... the demon beast mistakes me for something like its own kind...

As the High Priest, was that not a genuinely humiliating thing to hear?

Granted, even here, showing Saint-like qualities was dangerous. Still.

"Here, eat this."

Apparently deciding Rembrary was sulking over the shrunken portion, Hye-gyeol — blissfully oblivious — coolly handed over his own konjac jelly and strolled off toward the sink.

Rembrary sighed and peeled the lid off the jelly anyway.

I really must ask Daeju about this later.

But the very moment he raised the open jelly to his lips, Tae-in emerged from his room and came toward him with a sheaf of A4 paper in one hand.

He's not about to walk over here and slash me with those... is he?

Rembrary eyed him with some suspicion, but instead of any such thing, Tae-in simply drew near and meekly held out the bundle of papers.

"What is this?"

Rembrary asked without taking them, staying on his guard, and Tae-in grimaced and swore under his breath.

"Run one errand and this is the thanks I get, damn it."

"What errand?"

"Jungwoo hyung said to bring this to you. For the variety show you're going into."

"You mean One Week Time Machine?"

Rembrary accepted the script with a distinctly unimpressed face and gave it a careful look. There were words he had never once seen or heard, each followed by an "→" mark, and beside each of those, a word he did know.

That was the pattern.

"Are these words once used in Joseon?"

"How would I know? I'd assume so."

Tae-in answered curtly and retreated into his room. Rembrary leafed through the A4 pages Jongwoo had sent along.

After any number of twists and turns, the day finally came to film One Week Time Machine.

Rembrary was anxious — he still had not mastered all the words of Joseon — but unfortunately, he was told he could not bring the papers with the words written on them into the shoot.

Worse still, on the grounds that the setting was a virtual Joseon, he could not even bring his phone in, and his costume had to be changed into before entering the set.

"All the cameras inside the set are hidden, so you can simply go about your days thinking you've truly become a king. This here, Lee Sang-seon, will be assisting you."

The staff member brought over a man dressed in court-eunuch garb and introduced him to Rembrary, who was studying his red dragon robe in the mirror.

"Is he a civilian applicant?"

"No, he's one of our staff. Ms. Jang Tae-ri and Mr. Shin Jo-woon each have a staff member assigned to them in the same role, to help them out."

"Very well."

"You can live however you please, but there is a premise to the show, so the three of you must avoid running into one another."

As the staff explained, the man assigned to play Lee Sang-seon patted his own waist with a grin.

There was a walkie-talkie there — the point being to keep the three kings from crossing paths — but Rembrary failed to grasp what the gesture meant.

"One moment, please... since all three of you will be entering separately."

And fifteen minutes later.

At the staff's signal, Rembrary — trailed by court ladies, eunuchs, and guards — stepped into the palace where he was to live as king for one week.

He had assumed, it being only a week's stay, that the set might be a half-hearted affair. In fact, it was a fully realized palace.

Fascinated, Rembrary looked about him, then turned to Lee Sang-seon and asked:

"By the way — what if I wander about, my route tangles with someone else's, and I run into Mr. Shin Jo-woon or Ms. Jang Tae-ri?"

But from the moment he had set foot inside the set, Lee Sang-seon was no longer staff.

"I know not what Your Majesty speaks of, Your Majesty."

"?"

"Who might these Shin Jo-woon and Jang Tae-ri be?"

Their eyes met, and Lee Sang-seon flashed a grin.

Understanding at last, Rembrary nodded.

"Names of the anchovy and the wildcat I keep."

"Quite so. This humble servant had entirely forgotten."

Rembrary smiled with satisfaction and clasped his hands behind his back.

So... in this place, he could behave exactly as he had in his original world, and everyone would take it in stride... was that it...?

— End of Chapter 122: Three Kings (1) —