Jjijjipong! The Studio Script Nightmare
Jjijjipong! A few days later. As usual, I was rolling around on the bed thanks to the aftermath from yesterday's gym session. This damn muscle soreness showed no signs of letting up. They say you get used to it after about a week, so why was I still aching even after more than a month? Still, my body definitely felt better than before. Maybe this was just the process of getting back to normal levels? I was still a bit below average—no, way below—but I'd made clear progress since the start.
Feeling a swell of pride, I pulled Maximus into a hug and rolled around with him when my smartphone buzzed.
Bzzz. Bzzz.
A deep breath, then I hit accept.
"Hello?"
[Areum-ssi, good morning! How's your condition?]
"Ah, yes. President. Same as always."
[That's a relief. Anyway, I've contacted you to coordinate schedules—we've finalized the contract with Actor O Seokgyun's side.]
It was finally set. Actor O Seokgyun. A middle-aged man with a rugged look but a unique sensitivity, dreaming of camping. Camping with him... half excitement, half worry.
"When works for the date?"
[His schedule is pretty flexible, so they said to match your convenience.]
"Hmm... Could we do a weekday, then?"
[A weekday?]
"Yes. He wanted a 'quiet, peaceful camping' vibe, right? Weekends are packed no matter the site—no way to capture that atmosphere."
To show the true flavor of chartering a whole site, weekdays were unbeatable. No prying eyes or noise—just pure immersion in nature and camping. That had to be his exact fantasy.
[Ah, I see. We'll schedule it for a weekday, then.]
"Oh, for the location, that private site from when I first met Nana..."
The campground where I'd met Im Nana—perfectly secluded, unless you went deep into some forest or logging road, nothing beat it.
After explaining the site, President Kim Manho got to his next point.
[And Areum-ssi, for this project... how about we make it a series instead of a one-off?]
"A series?"
[Yes. Actor O Seokgyun's character is so unique—seems a shame to wrap it up with just one camp.]
He laid it out: a three-parter. Episode 1: our first meeting in the studio, gear intros, and prep talk. Episodes 2 and 3: the full 1-night, 2-day camp footage.
Not a bad structure. Better than dropping into a site cold with a "Let's camp!"—viewers would connect more seeing us bond and prep first.
But... wait.
"Studio shooting?"
[Yes. We've booked a studio at the broadcast station.]
Studio? The word alone felt oppressive. So far, I'd been freewheeling outdoors, in my camping zone, or my car... but a formal studio? Cameras and lights everywhere? Cold sweat just thinking about it.
"Um... how does studio shooting work? I've never done anything like that..."
[No worries. It's simple. We'll send a script ahead. Just basic self-intros, actor intro, Q&A on camping. Think talk show format.]
Script. That word hit like a punch. Scripts made me freeze up worse. Hadn't I created that "hohoho" black history trying to stick to prepared lines on live stream?
'Can't we just go natural...?'
But he was top-tier supporting actor O Seokgyun. Even for variety, there needed to be structure. And above all... I was now a pro creator under MCN contract. No more amateur excuses. Pros handle scripts.
"...Got it. Let's do our best."
[Great! I'll email the script and detailed schedule tonight. Please review in advance.]
Call ended, I flopped onto the bed. Maximus licked my face for comfort, but the anxiety lingered.
Studio shooting... could I pull it off?
That evening.
With trembling hands, I opened the email. Attached: [Planning Shoot Ep1 Script_Final.docx]. The "Final" with a question mark felt off, but whatever.
S#1. Opening
MC (Han Areum): (Smiling brightly at the camera) Hello, subscribers! Your fairy of all things camping, Han Areum here~!
"......"
What the hell? Was I seeing things? I peered at the monitor again.
'Camping fairy'... Who wrote this? Who the hell wrote this script?! Yu Minji PD? Kim Seokho manager? Whoever it was, they had to be my anti-fan. Me, a fairy? I glanced in the mirror. Pretty, sure. Objectively fairy-level looks. Though the body was a bit cheeky for one.
Okay, skip the opener somehow... let's read to the end.
MC (Han Areum): (With sparkling eyes) Actor-nim, what do you think is camping's charm? For me, that moment of becoming one with nature is so thrilling~!
O Seokgyun: (Shyly) Me too... I agree.
MC (Han Areum): Oh my! We click! Jjijjipong!
"Kyahaaaa!!!"
I clutched my head and slammed my forehead on the desk.
Jjijjipong? In the 21st century?! This was torture. Social murder. Say this out loud? On camera? In front of scary Actor O Seokgyun?
'No way. I'd rather die.'
I wanted to call President Kim right then and complain. But...
'Pros don't pick scripts.' Some half-remembered line held me back. How long since I signed the contract? Couldn't whine already.
Fine. Practice. Acting was just good lying, right?
In front of the mirror. Deep breath, force up the smile corners. As cutely as possible, fairy-style.
"Ah, hello... Camping fairy... Han Areum here... hohoho..."
...Mirror me mocked me back. Voice goat-trembly, laugh like a bad con artist.
Again.
"Hello! Camping fairy Han Areum here! Kyarruk!"
Ugh, nausea. No. Absolutely not.
But the script demanded it: [(Smile brightly), (Cutely), (Adorably)]. Every direction strangled me.
A few more tries—disastrous.
"Oh my... we click... Jji... jjijji... pong..."
Chills hit even as I said it; I rubbed my arms.
This was bigger trouble than I thought. Self-loathing crashed in waves. Was this why I became a YouTuber? Why I camped?
Fuck. No way. Anything but jjijjipong.
Who?! Had Im Nana shot with scripts like this?
Curiosity hit; I called her. Connected before ringing.
[Hello~]
"Nana-ssi, I've got a burning question."
[Huh? What?]
Deep breath to steady. Then:
"You've done planning shoots, right? Who writes the scripts?"
[Scripts? Usually the director... no, president and me together? Ah, you saw it! I wrote most of this one? Good, right?]
"...You wrote it?"
[Yup! Don't you think people will love Areum smiling and saying lines like that? So cute. Jjijjipong!]
"It was YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!"
A shouting match later, call ended.
Im Nana. Vengeance coming. How did a early-20s girl even know jjijjipong...? But couldn't bail now. Studio booked, his schedule set. Breach penalty? Massive.
'...Gotta do it.'
Steeled myself, glared at the mirror. Long night ahead.
Shooting day. Sleepless night left my eyes hollow. Faint dark circles from script battles. Makeup cover 'em?
Heavy steps to the station. Heart pounding at the studio door.
'I can do it. Pro. Cog in capitalism.' Chant done, waiting room door open.
"Areum-ah! You're here!"
"...Huh?"
Unexpected face inside: Im Nana. Why?
"Nana-ssi? What brings you here?"
"Hehe, I'm your stylist for the day!"
She beamed, holding up makeup kit.
"Stylist?"
"Yup! Heard from the president you're shooting with O Seokgyun today? I'm a beauty YouTuber too! Here to doll up our Areum pretty!"
Really here for celeb spotting? Eyes screamed "star-gazing."
Whatever. Lucky me. Heh. Revenge sooner than thought.
No hesitation with target in sight. One shot. Against superhuman Nana, only surprise attack.
Straight knife-hand to her side.
"Hygyaaaaaack!!!"
Her scream echoed through the studio corner dressing room.
Mission complete.