Unnie! I'll Buy You a Bra!
(bowing bunny emoticon)
"Unnie!"
"Come out quick! Hurry!"
"Grandma and I are eating apples, so come right down!"
“What kind of action-hero energy is this…”
Is it because she's a real high school girl? They don't mess around.
Starting at 10 AM on a Sunday morning, Im Ha-rin bombarded me with texts like a machine gun, then actually showed up in real life.
Is this for real? Do girls actually go shopping for underwear together?
No, if I swap genders here, it's like guys hitting up a PC bang with friends and then buying panties. That's insane. Does that even make sense???
"Unnie, when are you coming? If you don't come down, I'm coming up???"
“…Crazy girl.”
Forget cool-headed judgment—Im Ha-rin's momentum was enough to kidnap me and have energy left over.
Ha, whatever. Let's think positive.
When I was a guy, I'd never done anything like a date, so this is a huge win, right?
Anyway, I had no clue what to buy at Lupin, so I zoned out for 30 minutes and bolted.
— Thud thud thud!
“Unnie—! You didn't die, did you? Right?” The high schooler packs a punch.
The heavy pounding on the front door echoed loudly through my place.
“Didn't you say you were eating apples?”
“Apples take 10 minutes tops!! Unnie, hurry up. We gotta go quick so we can buy stuff, go home, hit the PC bang, game some more! Days aren't long enough!”
Is this what they mean by energy vampire?
Is this why old guys say generational gaps are a killer?
“You're driving me nuts……”
I grabbed a black hoodie just like yesterday and threw it on haphazardly.
Good thing I showered right after waking up, sensing she might show.
“You, seriously. If you put this much effort into school…”
“I go to school like a champ. Don't worry, unnie.”
I opened the front door and stepped out, and there was Im Ha-rin in casual clothes, grinning at me.
Yeah, kids these days grow up so fast—without the uniform, you can't tell high school from college girls.
“But unnie… hmm.”
Im Ha-rin suddenly crossed her arms and scanned me up and down.
“What? You said let's go. You're the one short on time. What's up?”
“Don't you have anything else at home? You came in dolphin pants and a hoodie yesterday too. And the time before?”
“I do, but it's a hassle to dig out.”
I had more pants and skirts, sure.
But these turned out the most comfy after trying them.
“Unnie, you've got some hidden body confidence, huh?”
“…What?”
“Well, your thighs are killer, and your legs are nice and long? I'd wanna show 'em off too…”
“That's not it. Hold on. I'll change.”
“Huh? Unnie? Unnie? Wait, unnie?!”
I didn't expect it to come off that way.
Not some perv out to flaunt my figure, I just headed back inside and grabbed the first pair of track pants in sight.
* * *
Anyway, half-dragged out of the house against my will, I ended up at a department store reeking of cosmetics.
…I didn't even know there was one near home.
“Unnie, got a favorite brand? I'll get that one.”
“…Nope?”
Do girls have those? Don't you just grab any panties?
Brands for that too?
“Really none? Or something you've always wanted to try?”
“Nothing specific.”
“Tch… Unnie, playing hard to get? Aren't we super close now?”
No, I really don't know!
How the hell would I know where Jeong Hana got her panties and bras??
Guess I gotta pull the orphan card here.
“We're close, yeah. You think I'm holding out on purpose?”
“You've been 'dunno dunno' since earlier.”
“That's 'cause I really don't. Ha-rin, you heard from your grandma, right?”
Im Ha-rin glanced around as we hopped on the escalator and tilted her head.
“What, like how you chat with grandma sometimes, eat together? Not that.”
“You seemed to know last time.”
“That you were an orph—”
Im Ha-rin scratched the back of her head mid-sentence.
“Orphanage?”
“Yeah, think about it. You figure a girl from there fusses over brands for bras or panties? You wear what the nuns give you.”
“Oh…… Sorry.”
Orphanage for the win.
Universal excuse.
Pretty solid alibi, honestly?
“So… unnie, you never tried nice stuff even living there?”
“Not like I'm rolling in cash. Felt wasteful.”
“Wow… Then I'll get you something pretty today.”
“Buy me food instead.”
“No way! Nope!!”
I'd take chicken over pretty bras any day.
Ignoring half my words, Im Ha-rin grabbed my hand the second we stepped off the escalator and dragged me straight into an intimidating lingerie shop from the entrance.
Ah, this is awkward.
No clue where to look.
“Lemme see… Unnie, how 'bout this?”
Im Ha-rin picked up a lingerie set from the rack and showed it to me.
“Nah.”
“Why?”
“Color's kinda pervy.”
What's with the red. Red.
“No, unnie, color's changeable. Feel the fabric or whatever.”
Not a perv—why touch a bra?
They're all the same, right?
“Bras just itch anyway when you put 'em on…”
“That's 'cause yours are cheapo Daiso 2-3k ones! Know how much this is?”
“No matter the price, it itches against your—” Gurk…
89,900 won
What the—price error?
“What kinda nipple holster costs 90k?”
“Whoa… Unnie, that's so ignorant.”
Im Ha-rin tapped the red bra.
“This is new material, super comfy. Absorbs sweat great too, no rash even for big cups like yours…”
“Ah, okay okay. Enough. You're no salesperson… Ha, too pricey.”
No matter how good, it's just a bra?
Burning a high schooler's allowance on this feels wrong.
“Can't let you drop 90k. Let's get something else.”
“You like it though?”
“Dunno. Not my usual style.”
Shape's different for starters.
Jeong Hana's bras were like tank tops you could just slip on…
“Ha, can't be helped. This one… and this…”
“Hey, what're you— no?”
“What's no? Try 'em on and come out, unnie. You can try everything here, right?”
Grinning, Im Ha-rin straight-up asked the saleswoman watching us from 50 meters away.
“Yes, feel free to try them on, ma'am.”
“See? No charge for trying. Oh, but unnie, what's your size?”
“I, I said I don't kn—”
“Jeez, unnie knows jack about anything but games.”
Then don't drag me!
No time to refuse, Im Ha-rin shoved the hangers at me.
“Here, go try 'em quick and come out. Unnie!”
“No, I… wait. How many is th—”
While I floundered, she pushed me into the fitting room.
“…Gonna lose it.”
If I go out like “ugh, tried it~” without really doing it, it's pointless, right?
Bra inspections are overkill, but she'll grill me later if I actually tried her gift.
“Sigh.”
Finally, I glared at the bra on the hanger, let out a long sigh, and cracked the door.
“Hana. I dunno how to put this on. Help.”
Better to ask for help than struggle solo.
* * *
After department store shopping, we headed home, dumped the haul, and went right back out.
“I'll get this.”
Back outside, guilt stabbing me hard, I drew a line the second we entered the cafe Im Ha-rin was hyped for.
“Huh? I can cover this too, unnie.”
“Nah, I feel too bad. You dropped over 200k earlier, right?”
“Obviously? I paid with card.”
“You… No idea your allowance, but you good spending like that?”
That was the issue.
I planned to chew her out for even one 90k bra, but…
Im Ha-rin coolly bought me two whole sets.
Super basic designs, black too—couldn't even refuse!
“Yeah, Mom and Dad give me plenty. No biggie?”
“Ugh, fine. Okay. I'll wear 'em well. But drinks are on me today.”
Wanna shake this guilt of sucking her allowance dry to the bone!
“Sure. Then I'll have this…”
Im Ha-rin poked the kiosk on the table, picking some seasonal menu… thing.
Name full of English, flavor a total mystery.
“I'll stick with mango smoothie…”
“Unnie, but hey.”
Orders done, she propped her chin and stared right at me.
“You don't have a job?”
“You calling me an unemployed bum?”
“Not judging! You said no income earlier? Never heard about part-time gigs.”
Yeah, me neither.
No deposit records in Jeong Hana's account screamed “part-time.”
“Kinda… Part-times are scarce these days.”
Honestly, no plans for one right now.
Money gets dire? Last resort's there.
Rice farming ain't a Lost of Fantasy meme for nothing—real pinch, I can grind cash anytime.
“Really? Then how 'bout this for you, unnie?”
“What… You recommending a job?”
Im Ha-rin nodded and shoved her smartphone screen at me.
Lost of Fantasy PlayPeople Channel Seeks Your Valuable Tips & Guides!
PlayPeople?
What, here it starts as a YouTube channel instead of a site?
Kinda fresh. Pretty famous guide site back home.
“What's this?”
“Channel run by PlayPeople company. They take game tips/guides like this, turn 'em into shorts or vids?”
“So, post my tips there for cash?”
“Yeah, famous for paying well!”
No need to write full guides—just spill tips, get paid.
“Wanna try? Unnie, they might even hire you full-time! Heard tons got scooped from Mushroom Story, Underground Castle & Hero that way.”
“Yeah? Eh, too much hassle. Pass.”
Im Ha-rin pulled a sky-falling face at my words.
“H-Hassle, so no?”
“Yup, too hassly.”
You wouldn't get it.
Back home, we didn't call 'em PlayPeople addicts, “auto-block PlayPeople,” or mouth-breathers for nothing.
“I just wanna game in peace.”
Unfortunately, the world doesn't bend to my whims.