The Cleanest Apology in the World
Mut-runo is everywhere.
Mut-runo here, Mut-runo there.
I asked my followers to write an apology for their ban appeals, and instead, they started terrorizing me with Mut-runo—fan fiction about me.
I started this off on the wrong foot.
Because of that one damn guy who hit the #1 spot on the trending page, everyone and their mother jumped on the bandwagon, using Mut-runo to try and get their bans lifted.
I really want to see the face of the guy who started this. What kind of person is he?
After unbanning about 30 people, I finally threw in the towel.
"Let's stop here."
"That's enough, I'm not doing it! You have to know when to stop, this is too much."
The biggest reason I decided to stop reading Mut-runo was because of one post that finally crossed the line.
[Title: The Awakened's Reaction to Vtuber Emperor Lee Jia]
Nickname: LeeJiaIsAnAnomaly
Content:
Yeo Junghwan: Ah, Lee Jia's broadcast was fruitful again today!
Ahn Suhee: Lee Jia, I want to teach her my magic.
...
Yoo Iseul: Damn it, Lee Jia! I like you!
...I couldn't stand it when people I actually know started appearing in Mut-runo.
It’s clear the public doesn't really know Yoo Iseul. They only know her as "the girl with the bad attitude," but she is actually the most mysterious Awakened from the perspective of the public.
There couldn't be a more appropriate character to appear in Mut-runo.
But if her name comes up, I can't even control my facial expressions, and if I open my mouth and make a slip of the tongue, it’ll be a total disaster.
I think it's right to stop reading Mut-runo here.
Right.
Even though ten thousand people were banned, the fact that my viewership hasn't dropped below 10,000 is proof that most of my followers have alt accounts.
30 people out of 10,000. Percentage-wise, that's only 0.3 percent, but that's just because so many people were banned from my channel in the first place.
It's already been an hour and a half since the content started.
30 people is plenty.
Ah.
I don't know about anything else, but that donation really gets under my skin.
"Strict? What do you mean strict? It's incredibly lenient!"
My channel's ban policy is so lenient it can't even be compared to other Vtubers.
I let almost everything slide unless you really cross the line.
Looking at the chat history of the banned users, there were three main patterns.
Number 1, pitting Vtubers against each other.
[But doesn't it feel like Lee Jia will overtake Ayase soon? I don't think Ayase is all that lol]
I don't know about other things, but I never unban the guys who type this type of chat. It's fine to put me down, but comparing me to other Vtubers to lift me up is... an unforgivable sin.
Number 2, blasphemy.
[The grace of the Shining Stars is bullsh*t lol. It's disgusting to see people worship a fake god.]
I've said it many times, but this isn't roleplay. It's real.
If you call the Shining Stars a "mediocre person who lost to the Non-Shining Galaxy" as a joke, I'm willing to overlook it with a 7 to 30-day ban, but if you blaspheme like this seriously, it's an instant permanent ban.
Number 3, harassment.
...I'm embarrassed to say it, but this type accounts for 99 percent of my bans.
Again, joking around is fine, but...
When I look at the chat history, I genuinely wonder if these crazy people are possessed by demons.
"The rules aren't the problem. You guys typing bad things are the problem! And, though it's a bit awkward for me to say it myself... my manager is doing a great job, too."
My channel manager, 'GraceOfMutStar', is the best at what they do.
They don't act out just because they have power, they don't overstep their bounds, and they ban people strictly according to the rules.
If I didn't have a manager, my channel probably wouldn't even be running properly.
This isn't just my opinion.
The followers also readily admit that my manager is good at their job.
Well, as the chat said, I treat my manager at the highest level in the industry. I'd be the one in trouble if they didn't work hard.
"I told you not to chat!"
Doing a good job is one thing, but becoming a "named" user is a problem.
"Alright, I'll look at just a few more for the very last time. And for the record, I'm not reading any more Mut-runo."
I read through a few more popular posts, but there was no one I wanted to unban once I excluded the Mut-runo ones.
The patterns were one of two things.
First, they wrote a good apology, but their crime was too heavy.
Hello, Jia. I'm a 22-year-old who enjoys your broadcast. About 3 months ago, on your broadcast... ...In that sense, if you lift my ban, I will type nicely and watch your broadcast quietly. Thank you.
They wrote such a good apology that I was going to unban them, but then:
[Lee Jia is honestly better at broadcasting than Mitsuki lol]
[Isn't Ayase a total joke? lol]
[Ayase <- A case who grew her broadcast size by picking up empty houses like a total water rocket]
How dare they blaspheme Ayase in front of me? Do they think I'd unban them?
The second pattern was when the crime was light, but the apology was written like sh*t.
[Ah, I want milk]
[Goo goo, Mommy! Feed me!]
[The baby bowl is crazy]
[Isn't it a milk bag, not a holy power bag?]
[Pooooooof! lol]
...Uh, this guy is crazy.
...But surprisingly, this is the average follower. There are tons of guys who type like that.
It's borderline, but it didn't cross the "line" I have in my head, so it's not enough for a permanent ban.
The problem is.
This crazy guy typed that 50 times in one minute.
In other words, he wasn't banned for harassment, he was banned for spamming.
Compared to the others, this is a misdemeanor, so I was willing to unban him, but:
I didn't do anything wrong, why was I banned? I only said the truth? Is this a fact-ban? If you have a conscience, unban me, Jia.
...This was basically a protest, so I ended up skipping him too.
"That's it, I don't think there are any normal people left, so I'll stop here."
"100,000 won is a different story."
If you pay, things change. I can read your post as a kind of reaction.
No, wait, before I read the apology.
"I'll do an autopsy first. Give me your main account ID."
"...The nickname is already suspicious, and I don't like the excuses."
I didn't like it, but since it was 100,000 won...
I checked the chat history of 'ArmpitFootButtSuck'.
"Augh! I told you to stop, please!"
His chat history can be summarized in one word.
[CENSORED].
"Sorry, but this is a capital offense. You really lived up to your nickname."
Right, it's an abyss.
Even for 100,000 won, I don't think I can unban this.
But 'ArmpitFootButtSuck' was persistent.
"I told you, it doesn't matter how well you write the apology, this is a no-go!"
"Ha... alright, but don't be disappointed if you don't get unbanned."
Sorry, but even if a legendary master calligrapher wrote the apology for you, I have no intention of unbanning you.
I checked his apology.
[Title: Ah, I have received the grace of the Shining Stars]
Nickname: OneBlessedByMutStar
Content:
Ah, Shining Stars!
Under your brilliant name, I confess the sins I have committed.
I am a foolish sheep, a prodigal son who has lost his way!
The sin of not knowing the grace of the Master and spitting out bad words, I deserve to die!
...
I have apologized to the Shining Stars.
I request a ban appeal.
"..."
"...I've lifted your ban."
"What. He said he apologized to the Shining Stars. Then that's the end of it."
This is it.
This is the cleanest and most ideal apology in the world.
Simply put, this guy used a cheat code.
With the screams of the followers who did the stupid work of writing Mut-runo, the ban appeal content ended.
Oh, for the record.
The event is over from this moment on, so I don't plan on unbanning anyone even if they give a sincere apology to the Shining Stars from now on.
Because people might abuse it by selling the name of the Shining Stars.