Chapter 174: Little by Little, Slowly (9)
Translator: RaidenTL
Chapter 174: Little by Little, Slowly (9)
It wasn't that I didn't understand where Luche was coming from. Back then, I had been in charge of her basic training, and we had a senior-junior relationship. It made sense that she wouldn't be thrilled about me using formal honorifics with her now.
Even though we had no ill will toward each other and had spent the last ten years together, the sudden realization of our past made it feel like we were reuniting after a long time. I could understand why my formal tone bothered her.
However, the time we spent together when she was A.T. was only a few months, whereas the time I had served as her subordinate was nearing a decade.
Even if I now knew the Luche standing before me was A.T., she had been my superior for the last ten years. And as long as we were on Earth—however long that might be—she was the person I had to serve as my boss.
From the perspective of someone who had spent a long time in the military, suddenly dropping formalities was not an easy task to execute.
"Why are you being so formal?"
As if sensing my hesitation, Luche stared intensely at me and spoke.
"Because you're the Team Leader."
I understood well enough that she was A.T. without her having to say it again. But the fact that she was A.T. didn't change the fact that she was the current Luche.
The time I spent with A.T. was enjoyable, but the memories of the last ten years with Luche were far more vivid.
"But you're still my senior."
It was true that I was from an earlier recruitment class. However, having missed several opportunities for promotion, I was very used to using honorifics with juniors who had become my superiors.
It wasn't just me; it was incredibly common for people to miss the promotion window and end up serving under their juniors. It wasn't considered strange at all.
In fact, within Spacetro, where people gained vast experience traveling across various planets, it was a frequent occurrence.
"But you are still Team Leader Luche. If I start speaking informally, then going forward..."
While a superior and subordinate might speak casually if they are close, it’s generally not a good choice for the organizational hierarchy. Finding out Luche was A.T. was shocking but joyful. That didn't, however, automatically grant me the right to speak informally to my Team Leader.
Just as I was about to explain that it was too much to ask me to speak casually right away, Luche’s eyes, which had finally dried, began to well up again.
"Wait, hey... why are you crying again?"
"Shut up... I'm not crying yet."
If she said she wasn't crying yet, didn't that mean she was going to cry?
The most urgent matter was to soothe her before she broke down again. I needed to find a way, and fast. Usually, buying her something sweet from a nearby convenience store would do the trick, but we weren't in a situation where I could just pop out to a shop.
"You speak informally to Seira..."
"Ah..."
I had just argued that I couldn't speak casually to a Team Leader, but I had no rebuttal once she brought up Seira.
Unlike Luche, whom I had known longer as a superior, Seira and I had spent an overwhelming amount of time together—first as neighbors and friends, then as peers in the same recruitment class.
I used honorifics with her in official settings, but that was strictly for public appearances.
It wasn't that I didn't respect Seira as a Team Leader. When my path to promotion was blocked because of the various messes I caused, she was the one who constantly cleaned up after me, and in the process, she achieved results that everyone acknowledged.
Having watched her exploits from right beside her, I recognized her status as a Team Leader more than anyone else.
But speaking informally to Seira was a separate issue.
We had been friends for so long that it felt awkward to use honorifics with her in private. Of course, when Seira first became a Team Leader, I tried to be formal, but I found it awkward and Seira hated it, so we spoke casually when it was just the two of us.
Most of the soldiers and other Team Leaders were aware of this. A soldier speaking informally to a Team Leader might be bad for the hierarchy, but since most people in the Seoul Branch knew how long I had been with Seira, they tended to overlook it.
"Seira is a bit... how should I put it? We're just too close..."
Even if people overlooked it, I couldn't take it for granted. I needed a solid explanation if someone asked.
Luche was demanding to know why I spoke casually to Seira but not to her. Since I never usually had to explain it, I racked my brain to find the right words.
But this wasn't something an explanation could fix. In the past, Luche had watched Seira and me together and had been part of that circle.
If I explained, "It's because I've known Seira for a long time," Luche would technically fall into that category too. There was a difference in the total duration, but the "length of time" argument wouldn't hold water.
In fact, it would sound like I was saying, "I'm staying formal because the time we spent as senior and junior was too short," and if the conversation went that way, Luche’s mood might sour beyond my control.
"Ugh, hic..."
While I was busy thinking after saying I was close to Seira, Luche’s clenched fists began to tremble, and tears were on the verge of spilling over.
"No, that's not it! You and I are close too, Luche. Of course we are."
To hell with the reasons why I could speak casually to Seira but not to Luche. I didn't have time for that. I couldn't draw a line between us right after finding out she was A.T.
I reached out and stroked the head of the near-tears Luche. I erased the honorifics I had been using and adopted the casual tone I used to comfort her in the past.
Luche, who might have burst into tears if I'd waited a second longer, wiped her eyes with the back of her hand. I, on the other hand, struggled to adjust to this atmosphere, which was so different from twenty years ago.
If I viewed the A.T. of twenty years ago and the current Luche as separate people, there would be nothing to adjust to. But it was startling to realize that A.T., who had started to pick up my personality traits back then, had grown up to be this Luche.
"They say people change, but isn't this a bit much?"
If I told the guys who used to work in the hangar back then that A.T. had become a crybaby, they would never believe me.
I suddenly wished Kruger would wake up soon so I could tell him the news.
"It's all because of you, Senior."
"Me?"
I tilted my head. It was true I hadn't recognized her for ten years, but I couldn't think of anything I'd done that would have changed her personality so drastically.
"Kaijin are fast learners."
I knew that already, but I wasn't sure if it fit the context of this conversation.
As Luche said, Kaijin learn incredibly fast. Especially those who are less than thirty years old; they go through a period of significant change influenced by their surroundings, much like human puberty.
Of course, there are individual differences, and some Kaijin don't change much at all.
For instance, Roy hadn't changed much from his days as a Bioroid to becoming a Kaijin. But while his personality remained stable, he still displayed the characteristic fast learning of a Kaijin through the many things he experienced.
While some Kaijin learn without their personalities changing, others undergo massive shifts.
As I thought about this, Luche’s transformation began to make some sense.
Perhaps the repeated defeats she suffered as the leader of Team 3 over the last ten years had triggered this change.
The problem was, if the change was due to Team 3's losses, then her saying it was "because of me" didn't add up.
"Senior. At first, you weren't interested in me at all."
"At first? You mean when we met as Team Leader and subordinate?"
It was important to know if "at first" meant when she was A.T. or when she was Luche. It turned out she meant when she was Luche.
Naturally, I wasn't very interested at first. I had been living a relaxed life after being pulled from active duty, only to be suddenly reassigned to the field. Since it had been a long time since I held a combat role, I needed a lot of time just to get my edge back. I was too busy looking out for myself to care about a new Team Leader.
Then, after thinking it over, I reached a conclusion and asked her without hesitation.
"Was it because you wanted me to recognize you?"
It occurred to me that her personality shift might have been an attempt to grab my attention—since I didn't recognize her and showed no interest.
I asked her, half-doubting, and Luche avoided my gaze, her face turning red.
"Is that really it?"
Her avoiding my eyes only confirmed it, making me realize that I was indeed the cause of her personality change.
"It's embarrassing to say it myself, so don't ask."
Was this why she only felt better when I comforted her, even when other team members failed? The things I had dismissed as Luche’s whims started clicking together like puzzle pieces.
"I'm sorry. You must have waited a long time."
Thinking of Luche waiting for over ten years made me feel truly apologetic. Luche, still looking away, stole a glance at me.
"I've always been slow to catch on, but I was really late this time."
I had promised myself I wouldn't let being slow cause things to go wrong anymore, but I hadn't realized there was still something I'd missed.
"There's probably a lot more you haven't realized yet."
"Huh?"
"I'm not going to tell you. You have to figure those out for yourself, Senior."
The idea that there were still things I hadn't noticed made me feel uneasy, but seeing as Luche said I should take my time to figure them out, it didn't seem like anything dangerous.
"So, Senior. What are you going to do about Hunter Killer?"
"Ah..."
As Luche calmed down, she brought up the topic we had discussed in the office. The moment I prepared to talk about it again, I felt my face heat up all the way to my ears.
"What's wrong?"
I stopped stroking her head and stood there with a red face. Luche tilted her head at me, and this time, I was the one who avoided her gaze.
"Trying to talk to you about this again... it's just really embarrassing now."
Talking to Luche about Hunter Killer—about my girlfriends—had been nerve-wracking before, but not embarrassing. She was my boss, and I was reporting on matters related to the enemy, so there was nothing weird about it.
But now that I knew Luche was A.T., reporting about Hunter Killer felt incredibly shameful. It felt like I was asking for dating advice from a junior I used to train.
"What do you plan to do? Dating the enemy... and an entire team at that."
"I only reported it back then because I was struggling. Now, I can handle the situation to some extent. It might even help with the investigation into the Superhumans."
I didn't want to use my girlfriends for the mission, but when making a report, I had to frame the story that way.
Though I had told them to put it off for now, it was true that Hayoung and Su-ah had suggested transferring to Spacetro, which would certainly bolster our investigation into the Superhumans.
"Are you serious about dating them?"
"...Yes."
It was embarrassing, but I could answer that question directly without any evasion. I wiped the playful smile from my face and spoke seriously. Seeing my sincerity, Luche let out a long sigh.
"Fine, I get it. Since it's your choice, Senior, I'll keep it a secret for now and watch how things go."
She then smiled and touched my hand, which had been stroking her hair. I petted her for a moment longer before letting go.
Luche hopped up from her seat, her mood seemingly back to normal, and stretched.
"Still, it's a shame. I can't believe I let those Earthlings beat me to the punch."
Hearing Luche’s playful remark, I gave a faint smile and countered with a joke of my own.
"Anyone listening would think you actually like me."
I followed Luche as she walked toward the bus door to get off. Hearing my words, she stopped in her tracks and spun around to face me.
"What makes you think I don't?"
It was as if she was responding to a joke by saying it wasn't a joke at all. I froze and stared at her blankly.
"You were the first person to ever tell me that I was someone precious, Senior."
Luche blushed, gave a bright smile, and then hurried off the bus. Left alone, I stood there dazed, staring at the door she had just exited.
"Wait, what?"
It didn't take long for my stunned mind to process her words and return to reality. I knew I shouldn't jump to conclusions after experiencing so much in such a short time.
For now, let's take it one step at a time. There's no need to rush.